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Category: Personal Development

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Growth Leadership Personal Development

Successful Introverted CEOs

As a new CEO, your employees expect you to be an extrovert with an outgoing, gregarious personality. Most people have the perception of a successful CEO as being an extrovert. But, in reality, you are a successful introvert who has mastered the ability to act like an extrovert.

There are many ingredients to success and many entrepreneurs who are introverts have their own challenges to deal with when it comes to business success. Introverts typically find several traditional situations too exhausting and draining.

According to research, about 70 percent of CEO’s describe themselves as “introverts”. The list of well-known “Who’s Who” of corporate introverted CEOs includes: Bill Gates, Warren Buffet, movie magnate Steven Spielberg, and Sara Lee’s Brenda Barnes. Introverts make up 40 percent of the population. Considered as introverts, these CEO’s, at times, are able to move far enough towards “extrovert status” to be considered ambiverts. Ambiverts are those who fall in the middle between extroverts and introverts. At times, they can function well in many different situations.

Thriving in corporate America as a shy/introverted executive, you may find yourself moving up the corporate ladder in your organization. Take into consideration the characteristics possessed by introverts. Introverts value privacy, need quiet time alone to recharge, feel more comfortable being alone than being with others, prefer to know a few people well (this fits for many CEOs who are “lonely at the top” and confide in a small circle of friends), like to work independently or with one or two other people, prefer to focus on one thing at a time, communicate best one-to-one, and prefer to communicate in writing instead of through talking. Before speaking, introverts think first then act on what they think about. They prefer listening more than talking, rehearse things before saying them, and are perceived as “great listeners”.

One common trait of highly successful executives is that of being creative. Since introverts spend a lot of their time alone, they are among the most creative individuals in business. Introverts, who are highly effective in completing tasks, can usually get away with saying little, but when they do speak, it is meaningful.

Introverts are also considered self-sufficient, confident, hardworking, having firm goals, reserved, being educated to overcompensate for the lack of social skills, and being Rhodes Scholars. Among people with PhDs, there are three introverts to every one extrovert.

On the other hand, extroverts typically have lots of friends; feel drained when they are bored and alone; are energized when they are with other people; are motivated to action; tend to be sociable with others, talkative, and assertive; prefer face-to-face verbal communication rather than written communication; are ready to share personal information easily to others; and respond to situations quickly. Jonathan Rauch, a self-proclaimed introverted correspondent for The Atlantic and a senior writer for National Journal, wrote a short article on introverted CEO’s that states: “Leave an extrovert alone for two minutes and s/he will reach for his/her cell phone.” Rauch also said that “In contrast, introverts need to turn off and recharge.”

Introverts are among the most successful people in the world. As an introvert, you need to find your own ingredients to success. For as an introvert, while you may not appear as if you have mastered the ability to act like an extrovert, you have the ability to demonstrate that you can be just as successful as other people. Introverts have to train themselves well enough to work through their reserved characteristics and know what they want to do with their career. As an introverted entrepreneur, you have a lot to offer the business world, but you still prefer to grab as little of the spotlight as possible. Do not let being an introvert stop you from reaching your goals − you have the ability and skills to get the job done!

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Best Practices Marketing Personal Development Technology

Your Response to AI Is Actually a Personality Test

I am working with large companies on their use of Artificial Intelligence all the time, and it is possibly the most polarizing technology I have ever been involved with. Some people believe that AI will give us all a life of leisure, with machines doing more of the work so we don’t need to slave away for 40 hours a week. Others are spooked because they think that AI is coming for our jobs. What seems hard for each of those groups is that they are both essentially projecting the same thing–it’s just a question of whether they are optimistic or pessimistic personalities.

I see the same thing with my own clients–AI is equally polarizing, but this time it is around its effectiveness. Some are AI skeptics, talking about how the technology is over-hyped. Others believe it is magic, and will buy anything with those two magic letters. Both views are right–and wrong. AI just isn’t very simple.

Businesses should always be looking to improve their return on investment, which means choosing the simplest technique that solves the problem. Sometimes that’s AI, but often it’s something simpler, cheaper, and lower risk, so we should start there. Many folks are surprised when I say that, because they expect me to be pushing AI for everything, but I don’t see how that makes any sense. I spoke with a potential new client who was so taken aback that as we were leaving, they said to us, “Gee, we speak to a lot of vendors, but thanks for surprising us.”

If you are listening to vendors blathering on about that 5G blockchain kind of AI, it’s time to stop listening to buzzwords and start looking for competence. If it sounds too good to be true, it is. If your spidey sense starts to tingle every time they start talking about neural networks, listen to that inner voice. AI is no different from every other kind of approach out there. Used appropriately, it can be a huge benefit to your business. But you should be asking questions if your vendors wave their hands and can’t really explain why AI is needed and exactly why it works better. Don’t pay surge pricing for the flavor of the month.

Categories
Best Practices Entrepreneurship Personal Development Women In Business

Human Connection Wins Every Time

I started my entrepreneurial journey three years ago. After spending a few decades as a corporate worker bee, I realized that I wanted more for myself and my family. Clearly the obvious choice would be to quit my high paying, secure job to go back to school and start a business being a life coach. Several people thought I was crazy and others were supportive. I knew in my gut that I was making the right decision. But because I had no idea how to actually launch a business, my learning curve was – let’s just say – extended.

Starting a business is no joke. You need a lot of hutzpah to do it. You have to believe in yourself and your mission so completely, you’re basically willing to lay everything you have on the line to succeed. And if you’re like me, working out of your living room, well then, you have to figure out how to network the right way. In the beginning, I was spending a lot of time networking online, because everyone was talking about how easy it was to make money over the interwebs. I made “friends” from all over the world in networking groups and cultivated my own following on social media. It garnered me a few clients and semi-successful product launches. It wasn’t bringing in the big bucks that’s for sure.

In order to get my business moving and working in my favor, I had to get out of my lonely living room and start meeting people. So I attended conferences, set up coffee dates with other entrepreneurs, and created initiatives that encouraged human connection. It only took about a million mistakes to realized that I am more productive and much happier when I’m connecting and collaborating with real life people.

To say I’ve learned more in the last three years about myself and my abilities would be an understatement. You truly have no idea what you’re capable of until you have no choice but to confront your fears and failures in order to turn them into success. I also learned that my seemingly extroverted self is also a bit of an introvert. I don’t love walking into a room full of strangers and making small talk. But with the help of a daily mindset practice, I’ve been able to change that view. Now I veiw walking into a room as a clean slate so to speak. A chance to learn about people I may not have ever had the opportunity to meet if it wasn’t for my current situation. An opportunity to connect and collaborate with like minded individuals, a way to make my brand more visible and to help others do the same with theirs.

We’ve become a society dependent on technology, which is great in some cases. In others, not so much. For a while we let human connection fall by the wayside. We stayed glued to our phones, worried that we might miss something important. Meanwhile something more important was sitting right in front of us the whole time. Human Connection is the most important aspect in building a business. It allows you to maintain focus, get feedback and exchange ideas. So get out there! And if you’re feeling trepidation about promoting yourself and your business, give me a call. I’ll be your wing-woman, because Human Connection wins every time.

Categories
Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How Do You View Your Time?

“The agency of time is an equal factor for everyone. To maximize time, be wise about how you view and use it.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

What’s your experience with time? How do you view it? Why is it that time appears to move slowly and at other times it appears to move much faster? There’s no secret about the answer. It’s what you do with your time and the perspective you have of it that makes it appear to pulsate.

This will take forever:

Have you observed how long a task takes when you think it’s going to take a longtime? Sometimes, it doesn’t take as long as you expected. When completed, you feel good and think, that didn’t take that long after all. More then likely, you feel good about your accomplishment and the perspective you have of time.

At other times, the task takes significantly longer than anticipated. You encounter impediments that you’d not considered. You become frustrated! In some cases, you pursue the task to completion. At other times, you surrender to what you perceive to be inevitable and throw in the towel.

What’s the end differences? The differences lie in the perception you had before you engaged in the task, what you experienced while addressing it and its outcome. Be mindful of that because it’ll shape your outlook when assessing future task.

I’m stuck:

Do You find yourself doing the same things repeatedly because you’re constantly relearning the same lessons? Do you see your goals moving further away as you attempt to achieve them? For you, time may seem to be a whirling mass that’s sucking you into a vortex. You’re in a rut!

Consider how you might improve your plight and develop a plan to do so. Then, engage your plan and observe the benefits derived from it. If they don’t meet your expectations, modify the plan. Be mindful of how you’re viewing the time spent when doing so. That will impact the view you have about your degree of success.

In the zone:

When you experience happiness, you experience the sensation of euphoria. When you experience prolonged happiness, that transcends into a higher sense of euphoria. It’s likened to being ‘in the zone’, a mental place that eclipses the limits of thought and time. What do you do to experience that sensation? Note what it is and when it occurs, because the more you replicate it, the more improved you’ll become. And, you’ll have a better perspective of what you’re doing with your time.

As you engage in your endeavors, consider how you view the usage of your time. If you note what makes you feel better, versus worse about its usage, you will begin to summit to the pinnacle of utilizing your time better, while feeling better about its usage. That will lead you to experience a higher sense of fulfillment … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

How you view the usage of time in a negotiation will impact the strategies you employ and how those strategies are rebutted by the opposing negotiator. If you view time to be short, you’ll take more drastic measures to get to the end point. That could cause the other negotiator to heighten his sense of time and both of you could find yourselves in a rushed position. That could lead to a calamitous negotiation.

Always be aware of how you view your time and maximize its usage to perceive it as being most beneficial to your cause.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Time #Success #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #liars #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #negotiator

Categories
Best Practices Growth Leadership Personal Development

8 Necessary Steps to Make Your Mistakes WRITE!

One of our favorite topics is making mistakes write. Yes, WRITE, like W-R-I-T-E, not just RIGHT. When we started Barefoot Wine, we made so many mistakes that we became experts at it. It then felt natural to create a process for making mistakes.

Our company was a success, but it was built on a foundation of mistakes. Our contracts were just three pages long when we started our business, but 20 years later, when we sold it, they were 37 pages long! We made 34 pages of mistakes along the way.

And that isn’t even the half of it! Our mistakes actually made all of our company’s documentation even better, beyond contract clauses. How? Well, we never put a good mistake to waste!

Here’s our guide to making mistakes write:

  1. Permission

Make sure you and your people have permission to make mistakes, as long as they do so in a way that betters your company. Many new hires come from environments that frown upon mistakes, whether that be their school, family, or a previous employer. They could’ve been embarrassed, punished, or even worse—fired—for making a mistake. You can’t blame them for not wanting to admit to their mistakes! And you can’t blame them for quick fixes, throwing a patch on the problem, saying, “Yeah, there was an issue, but it’s fine now.” That attitude must be changed with a culture of permission. Of course, if they are simply incompetent, they have to go. But sometimes, even the most competent person is afraid to admit to a mistake.

  1. Admission

Yes, you must admit when a mistake is made. Avoid exacerbation and cover yourself. It’s always better when you own up, apologize, and develop a plan to prevent the mistake from happening again. We refer to this as, “Aim, don’t blame!” Blame makes you a victim and it’s disempowering. Take ownership and aim your energy on preventing the mistake in the future. To put it simply, be responsible and clean up your own mess.

  1. Cause

All mistakes are caused by a misconception, misrepresentation, or miscommunication. Identifying these factors is your first step in making a mistake write. We’re all guilty of assuming something about the other person’s actions, and when we’re wrong, things don’t go well. As someone once said, “A-s-s-u-m-e: It makes an ASS out of U and ME!” When you can nail down the cause, you’re already on your way to improvement.

  1. Documentation

Identify any documents that need to be created, fixed, or improved in order to prevent future mistakes. Yes—documents! It could be a checklist, a job description, a signoff sheet, a procedure, a label, or even a clause in a contract. Maybe it’s a big sign above a low ledge that reads, “DUCK!”

  1. Write!

Write everything down. The mistake, the causes, and all revised documents that must be incorporated into your company. Get others involved in this process. Ask your people for suggestions and opinions, and ask other companies as well. Then, you can create new policies and procedures that will prevent the mistake from reoccurring as often. Just one mistake can improve several documents at the same time.

  1. Approval

If your revised documents get lost in the shuffle and are just filed and forgotten, you’ve wasted all your time. You need to get everyone involved. Distribute the new policy and make sure everyone signs off on it. Think about those outside of your company that need to give their approval, too. This is a great way to dissolve hard feelings and to prevent putting others at fault. Create a log where all of these signoffs are kept—this is a useful training tool for new hires. They can see proof of mistakes made and how the new policies and procedures will prevent them in the future.

  1. Acknowledgement

If someone on your team makes a mistake, but makes it “write”, publicly acknowledge them. People thrive on a higher authority’s validation, and on their peers’ approval. Simply write a memo and distribute it to the whole team: “Susan noticed an ongoing problem and improved our procedures to prevent it from happening again.” Now, you’ll notice three things will happen. First, everyone will know who Susan is, what she does for the company, and how she made the company better. Then, they’ll know that they’ll also be appreciated when they resolve an issue. Lastly, Susan is motivated to continue improving the company.

 

  1. And repeat!

One of our senior execs didn’t exactly appreciate this policy—“You’re trying to idiot-proof everything!” We quickly responded, “Not exactly. We’re making things idiot-resistant!” He said, “That could be true, but at this very moment, they’re building a better idiot!” And he was right! The target is always moving. So we added clause after clause to our contracts until they were 37 pages long.

You will make mistakes. Your people will make mistakes. So why not make them write?

For more, read on: http://c-suitenetworkadvisors.com/advisor/michael-houlihan-and-bonnie-harvey/

 

Categories
Growth Human Resources Personal Development

How to Tell the Difference Between Training that Is Frivolous and Training that Gets Results

Let’s take a look at two professional trainers. In today’s post, we’ll call them Joan and Jack.

How Joan and Jack Are Similar

Both Jack and Joan are energetic trainers who get their audiences laughing quickly. They will both do whatever it takes – using props or quacking or asking trainees to do silly things – to illustrate a concept or get them engaged. And when trainees leave at the end of the day, they feel energized and happy.

How Joan and Jack Are Different

A few weeks after training is over, the performance of the people who trained with Joan has really improved. The performance of the people who trained with Jack hasn’t. They quickly went back to “business as usual.”

In other words, Jack’s training is frivolous. Joan’s isn’t, because it gets results.

How to Avoid Wasting Money on Frivolous Training 

Define outcomes and make sure your trainer can reach them. Do you want your salespeople to contact 25% more new prospects? Do you want the people who deliver and install appliances for your store to give true “white glove” treatment to customers? Or do you want your hotel front-desk staff to delight guests with exceptional service?  Your trainer should explain his or her plans to break those processes down into individual steps and address them directly through training.

Help your trainer know who your trainees are. A good trainer will want to know about their ages, prior experience, educational level, current jobs, and all other factors that can be leveraged to engage them more fully in training.  A concerned trainer will also want to be aware of any factors that might cause them not to engage.

Work with your trainer to develop meaning metrics. If you work together to define what you will measure after training is completed, chances are good that your training will accomplish much more, because its goals are well defined.

Monitor sessions and make sure that training stays on track. If you are a company training director or a member of senior management, you might not want to attend sessions, because your presence could put a damper on trainees’ ability to relax and learn. If that is the case, ask a few trainees to check in with you at lunchtime or other breakpoints to tell you whether the trainer is hitting the benchmarks you created. If not, a quick check-in with the trainer can often get things back on track and avoid wasting time and money.

It’s All About Getting Your Money’s Worth and Getting Results 

If you are a training director who wants to record serious results from serious training, it’s important to work closely with professional trainers who don’t only entertain, but educate.  That’s the difference between training that’s frivolous and training that offers a good ROI on your investment.

About Evan Hackel

Evan Hackel is CEO of Tortal Training, a leading training development company, and principal and founder of Ingage Consulting. He is the host of Training Unleashed podcast, and author of the book Ingaging Leadership. Evan speaks on Seeking Excellence, Better Together, Ingaging Leadership, and Attitude is Everything. To hire Evan as a speaker, visit evanhackelspeaks.com and follow Evan on Twitter @ehackel.

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Best Practices Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Negotiations News and Politics Sales Skills Women In Business

Negotiators: Beware of the Hidden Danger in Free Value

“There’s always a hidden fee in free. Don’t accept free without knowing what that hidden cost might be.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

As a negotiator, what do you consider when you hear free? Do you think about the hidden danger that may lurk in something that’s free? Sure, there could be value in the offer, but you should also beware of the hidden danger in anything that’s free.

When you hear the word free, your brain goes into a sense of euphoria. The endorphins begin to flow at the thought of receiving something for nothing. In such a mindset, you can become susceptible to lowering your guard. Doing that can leave you vulnerable to unsuspecting ploys. That can occur even when you’ve planned how you’ll address such offers. When you find yourself in such quandaries, consider the following.

What’s the offer attempting to achieve:

People are motivated by their aspirations. Thus, during a negotiation when offers are extended, a goal is at the purpose of that offer. If you’re aware of that intent, you’ll be in a better position to assess its potential value. Offers are not equal. Don’t let one that appears to be free become too costly for you to accept. Examine it thoroughly.

What’s to be gained:

Sometimes, acquiring a concession in a negotiation can add value to your overall goals. If the concession appears not to contain a cost, its allure may become bewitching. Be cautious when such appears to be the case. Good negotiators accumulate chits that they can use at other points in the negotiation. Thus, while you’re receiving what appears to be free, what you’re really receiving could be an IOU.

The timing of the offer:

The timing of an offer can obscure hidden dangers. If the intent is to obtain a greater concession, a negotiator may seek smaller ones to build towards the larger one. Thus, in some cases, positioning may be the goal. That means, offering something for free may be the setup or cover up for something to come.

Always be aware of where a concession or request may lead. Since negotiations are the accumulations of gains and concessions, you don’t want to make a concession thinking that it will lead to more gains. Or, acquire gains that are too costly, compared to the concessions you make to acquire them.

What do you have to concede:

In every negotiation, good negotiators have red herrings to use as chits or diversions. They can serve as bartering pieces that don’t contain a burdensome cost to you, or as distracters from the real intent of your offer. In a best-case scenario, a red herring should be perceived as something of value that you possess that can be dangled as a sought-after desire that the other negotiator wants. The more he’d like to possess it, the greater its perceived value will be. Thus, if it doesn’t cost you anything to relinquish, you can heighten its appeal by feigning great concern to part with it. The point is, don’t weaken red herrings by relinquishing them too easily. Doing so will weaken your negotiation position.

There’s a cost associated with everything we acquire, even if it’s just the time that we invest. Because time itself has a cost. If you keep in mind that nothing’s free, you’ll maintain a more prepared mind to assess the hidden cost and hidden dangers that may be concealed in free offers. Doing so will make you a better negotiator … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Danger #value #free #Hide #bodylanguage #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

Categories
Growth Human Resources Personal Development

How to Identify the Best Candidates for Leadership Training

Leadership training programs offer your organization many important benefits, including:

  • A cost-effective and efficient way to fill your top jobs by promoting excellent performers from within your organization.
  • A powerful motivator that encourages your most talented managers to stay in your company for the long term.
  • An opportunity to create a strong cross-functional leadership team of individuals who bring extensive experience from different sectors of your organization.

Those are all important reasons to invest in leadership training. But before you start to design a leadership training program, let’s take a step back and ask an important preliminary question . . .

How can you select the best candidates to take part in your leadership training?

In a Breakthrough Ideas in Training webinar for Tortal Training Dr. Keith Halperin, Senior Partner at Korn Ferry, outlined these four “leadership dimensions” that should influence your choice of trainees and your training goals.

Experience – For the Korn Ferry leadership consulting team, experience is part of a process. Dr. Halperin and his team identify the most critical experiences that a company’s leaders have had in the past. They then create training that exposes leadership trainees to those same experiences.

Traits – These are specific competencies that leaders need in order to be successful in your organization. Identifying them requires study of your current leaders. Do they have experience doing business internationally, for example? Are they keen marketers, communicators, financial analysts, or something else? Once you have a fuller picture of key traits, you can select the strongest candidates and design training that cultivates the traits that they will need as they move into leadership positions.

Drivers – “Leading is hard work that takes energy and passion,” Dr. Halperin told the webinar. Before selecting candidates for leadership training, it is important to evaluate whether they really have the drive to want to handle the challenges of top leadership positions, or whether they’ll take your training just because it’s the next step up the ladder.

Competencies – Competencies are abilities that leaders are capable of developing. In his webinar, Dr. Halperin cited “Learning Agility” as one of the most important; it means a person’s ability to move into unknown situations, adjust to uncertainty, and understand what needs to be done. Learning agility also means the ability to learn lessons from past experiences that apply to new situations. Other competencies can include the abilities to earn trust, lead change and create a culture of innovation.

About Evan Hackel

Evan Hackel is CEO of Tortal Training, a leading training development company, and principal and founder of Ingage Consulting. He is the host of Training Unleashed podcast, and author of the book Ingaging Leadership. Evan speaks on Seeking Excellence, Better Together, Ingaging Leadership, and Attitude is Everything. To hire Evan as a speaker, visit evanhackelspeaks.com and follow Evan on Twitter @ehackel.

Categories
Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

What Do You Fear?

“Fear will masquerade as truth until it’s unmasked”. -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Do you know what you’re most fearful of and why? Does fear debilitate you when you’d rather be less susceptible to it? When you find yourself in the clutches of fear, you need to know how to escape it. If not, it will leave you imprisoned and entrapped in a web of despair.

Consider the following the next time you feel fear sneaking up on you.

Inner Child:

There were lyrics to a song that went – ‘little child, running wild …’. All of us carry our inner child with us throughout our life. That inner child can be the source of fearful things you experienced in your formative years that should no longer hold sway over you.

In dealing with your inner child, realize that you’re no longer that person. You’ve evolved. Keep your inner child in check and you’ll be more adaptable to dealing with things that you fear.

Insecurities:

What beliefs temper your insecurities? You should know what they are, why they come into being, and what stimulates them to rise to your consciousness.

Before you can deal with any fears, you must know why they’re prevalent and what gave them life. Once you pinpoint that source, you’ll know to what degree the fear is real or imagined. You’ll also have a better handle on how to deal with them and keep them in check.

Times of Happiness:

During times of happiness, be grateful. Revel in your bliss. But, don’t relax too long. The world continuously evolves, which means you must evolve to stay abreast with the changes that occur in the world.

The point is, the more you recognize when you’re in a state of happiness, the more you’ll focus upon your good fortunes. Doing that will relieve hidden stress, and dissipate fear. That will allow you to experience a greater feeling of happiness. Isn’t that a better cycle to be in?

To enhance your life, know why and when fear becomes ignited in you. To combat it, focus on the times when you were happiest in life. Draw from the lessons learned during those times. Then, mentally summon those happier times to combat fear. By doing that, you’ll recognize when you’re in a good place in your life, and know how to best deal with fear when it comes at you … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

During a negotiation, you and the other negotiator will be motivated by gain and loss at different points in the negotiation. It behooves you to understand when either source of stimulus is present because you need to adopt different strategies to deal with that segment of the negotiation. As an example, the fear of loss can be a potent tool to employ against the other negotiator. Be judicious when doing that so it doesn’t backfire on you.

By taming fear and using it as a source of motivation in a negotiation, you’ll have a greater grasp of how to control its usage. That will place you in a powerful position throughout the negotiation.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Fear #Success #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #liars #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #negotiator

Categories
Growth Management Personal Development

Take Pains to Differentiate Fact from Opinion

A lesson in communication and leadership from my new book Ingaging Leadership

We are living in a time when many people express their opinions as if they were facts. Many do it unknowingly, others intentionally. We hear politicians do it. It has also become commonplace on talk radio and television news.

When people speak with any level of passion or conviction, they often speak as if what they are saying is a fact. In reality, much of what people try to pass off as facts are simply opinions. And when people state an opinion as a fact, their audience is prone to believe it to be a fact and react to it in a certain way. Most often, the conversation either ends or never gets to the point of addressing real issues.

You might hear someone in your organization say, for example, “You cannot bring that product to market by early next year because of A, B, and C.” That person is stating opinions as though they were facts and if you disagree, you look like you are calling him or her a liar.

If you cultivate the habit of delineating between fact and opinion during conversations, you become more empowered to move toward real solutions. If you fail to do so, miscommunications usually result. Imagine, for example, that you’re asking for advice about a particular issue, but that you express your opinion of that situation as though it were undisputable truth. In such a case, the advice that you receive will probably not have great merit, because the other person will not base his or her advice on a wider and more comprehensive understanding of what the situation really is.

From the other side of the equation, it is wise to cast a similarly critical eye on the information you receive, by consistently challenging the assumption that what is being said or presented to you is actually fact. To make the most informed decisions, you need to investigate and become as certain as you can that you are considering not opinions, but the reality of what is taking place.

Now, it’s not realistic to think you can do this with absolutely everything that comes across your desk or in every conversation. Time limitations and pressures often will keep you from probing on a deep level into what you are hearing. And you do not need to do so all the time – not when you are dealing with low-priority issues or activities, for example. But you certainly should do it when you are dealing with serious or deep issues. That’s where you’ll want to dig deeper – to look at every angle to get to the real facts.

When you get there, you’ll realize a significant improvement in business. Fact or opinion? You decide.

Communications skills that help differentiate opinions from facts . . .

When you are offering an opinion, precede it with the phrase, “In my opinion.” This differentiates opinions from facts. Perhaps more importantly, it raises the quality of the conversation by inviting people to contribute to your opinion, refute it, or offer productive alternatives of their own.

Ask other people, “Is what you are saying a fact or an opinion?” This strategy, like the one just above, encourages others to be more alert to situations in which they are tempted to offer their opinions as facts.

Point out when other people are presenting opinions as facts. This can be difficult to do because in a way, you are pointing out that those other people might be lying. Plus, it can be unpleasant to challenge other people’s opinions. If someone says, for example, “Your price increases are killing sales,” you should consider exposing that statement by stating that it is an opinion, not a fact. You can then explore that opinion to see if it has validity or is simply an attempt to box you into a corner or limit a productive search for information and solutions. In some cases, you will discover the other person is simply trying to advance his or her own agenda or goals. One good choice of words is to say, “I believe . . .” (“I believe that other factors could be at work too . . . let’s explore some more.”) In a non-confrontational way, those words help you address the reality that another person is expressing an opinion as though it were a fact.

Get into the habit of looking for facts. If someone says, “Your price increases are killing sales,” you can work with that person to arrive at statistics, data, feedback, and facts that either support or refute the opinion. This elevates the quality of your conversation to a level of higher ingagement.

An Experiment for You to Try

Over the next two days, pay attention to times when people state opinions as facts. Watch some commentary shows on television and notice when it’s taking place. Pay attention to your own communication too, and try to make sure that others know when you are stating an opinion. What do these steps tell you about how effectively you and other people in your organization make this important distinction?

About Evan Hackel

Evan Hackel is CEO of Tortal Training, a leading training development company, and principal and founder of Ingage Consulting. He is the host of Training Unleashed podcast, and author of the book Ingaging Leadership. Evan speaks on Seeking Excellence, Better Together, Ingaging Leadership, and Attitude is Everything. To hire Evan as a speaker, visit evanhackelspeaks.com and follow Evan on Twitter @ehackel.