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Category: Body Language

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Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Negotiations Sales Women In Business

“How To Display Massive Confidence By Your Body Language“ – Negotiation Insight

 

Click here to get the book!

 “How To Display Massive Confidence By Your Body Language“

“Confidence is perceived. And body language is its deliverer.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

Your body speaks. It does so through the body language you display to others. Through that, they assess the degree of confidence you possess.

He walked painfully slow and hunched over – people gaped at him as soon as he entered the room. His pace suggested that he wasn’t in a hurry to get anywhere fast. When he spoke, he did so in a low tone that caused others to lean in to hear what he was saying. After he departed, one individual in the room to whom he was attempting to sell his company’s latest product said, “and that’s the sale’s rep they sent to represent their company – they must be having serious problems.”

I’m willing to bet that you didn’t think our slow-walking, slow-talking person was a sales rep. You most likely have an image of salespeople being full of vigor. When your body language doesn’t match expectations, your intent can become misperceived. Worse, others might assume you lack confidence.

 

The following are ways that you can convey more confidence in the way you use your body language.

 

Walking Taller:

When you feel threatened, your body contracts. That’s the body’s way of making itself a smaller target. Thus, when you walk hunched over, you’re signaling that you feel unsafe.

To project more confidence, walk erect. Hold your head high and your shoulders back. That’ll signal fearlessness. You’ll become perceived as possessing more physical and mental strength. At that moment, others will be less likely to challenge you and more open to listening to you.

Walking Fast:

Through their pace, fast walking people indicate that they have someplace to be. They’re on the move. Their gesture suggests that they possess energy – energy is something others sense. It’s something that attracts attention.

When walking into a room, walk at a quickened pace – you’ll command attention. Movement attracts our eye. The faster that movement, the more riveting our attention will become to that motion.

Firm Handshake:

The receiver of a handshake makes assumptions about its deliverer. That’s due to the nonverbal information dispatched through handshakes. With a weak handshake, the receiver might assume the deliverer is weak of will. He might also assume that he can manhandle the deliverer.

When shaking hands, consider the message you’re sending. Based on the nonverbal message you wish to transmit, consider shaking someone’s hand based on the firmness of their handshake.

When people meet for the first time, a handshake will usually last for three up-and-down movements. If it’s longer, that may suggest that there’s a powerplay at hand. That means, the person holding the other person’s hand the longest is attempting to exude control. Most likely, he’ll attempt to maintain that control throughout the engagement.

Strong Voice:

An unintended weak voice suggests that the speaker lacks commitment or possesses insecurities. Whenever you wish to sound convincing, use a louder and stronger voice. Raise it a few octaves above your normal speaking voice. That’ll be enough to convey commitment about what you’re saying. You can also add a deeper tone on words you wish to emphasize. That will give those words more meaning. It’ll also enhance the perception of your gravitas.

Smiles and Frowns:

A smile displayed at the appropriate time adds additional meaning to your words. It can turn a sarcastic remark into one of puzzlement (i.e. what did she mean by that). A smile can also deepen a relationship through the warmth of conveyance.

A frown can be very potent. If you wish to display dissatisfaction with someone’s words, let a frown represent your thoughts. By not using words, that person will wonder to what degree you’re dissatisfied with his pronouncements. If he’s not astute, he’ll begin giving you unexpected information.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

Knowing how to read and use body language will give you an advantage in a negotiation. Being able to read and use body language accurately will extend that advantage … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

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Body Language Health and Wellness Leadership

As a Man, Do These Describe You?

Guys

Here are a few things that are true for most of us:

  •  We suck at talking about things that truly matter. So, we end up in personal and private battles that affect our entire world.
  •  We confuse the word vulnerable with the word weakness. So, we end up not being close to our spouses and feel underappreciated accordingly. 
  •  We do what we’re most confident in and avoid what we’re least confident in. Typically, the area we are least confident in deals with how to be closer to our wife and our kids. 
  •  Our private and personal world is directly tied to our professional world. When one is off – so are the others. 
  • We don’t know who to trust so we trust nobody with the deeper things of life. So, we end up isolated and struggling in ways nobody knows about – including our wife. 
  •  We all fear loss of some sort. Whether it’s loss of income, career, company, marriage or whatever…we all have fear within. Even so, we fake strength and it’s costing us every day! 
  • We all have blind spots. The only way to see them is with someone else’s help. However, most of us don’t have a person who can be honest with us without us getting defensive. 
  • Our metrics for success are often tied to our income and toys more than they are to our life and legacy. When we leave this planet, the only things that really matter are our faith, family and friends. If we major in the wrong things…it’s a sad ending. 
  • When we are hit with reality, instead of dealing with it, we turn up the noise and get back to the rat race. 
  • Our excuses are actually truths wrapped in lies. Until we own our $@*% we can’t be helped & we will find someone, or something, to blame.

If you’re still reading, then obviously something (or a few things) hit home.

MY greater focus for men is helping men who are secretly struggling, escape their fears.

If that’s you, let’s talk.

I can help!

PS – If that’s you – what’s it costing you to not do something about it AND how much life is getting away from you? I know for a fact, you will not wish you waited longer to get it together.

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Body Language Entrepreneurship Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Operations Sales Skills Women In Business

“Do You Know How To Be A Powerful Negotiator” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

 “Power – something that others grant you, even if you momentarily take it from them.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

Click here to get the book!

“Do You Know How To Be A Powerful Negotiator”

 

He was pompous, screamed at others while demeaning them, and not well-liked – most of his associates detested him! Some wondered if that was why he’d been stuck in the same management position for over a decade. Plus, he was not a good negotiator – he lacked insight on how to use power. He used bullying tactics with his subordinates (i.e. you’d better do this or else), and veiled threats to delude his peers to get what he wanted. Everyone collectively swore they’d get even with him. And one day they did.

Do you know how to be a powerful negotiator?

 

Sources of Power and How To Use It:

Voice inflection – There’s power, or lack of, in the way you speak. You can make a statement that sounds like a question or a question that sounds like a statement simply by the inflection in your voice. To sound more powerfully, apply a deeper tone to your voice when emphasizing words of greater importance. This is especially true when negotiating. A deeper tone on, that’s my best price, conveys more conviction to your statement.

Positioning – Whether it’s your physical proximity to others or the proximity of your words, what proceeds your words impacts their perception. Therefore, be mindful of when you speak. If you speak after someone has delivered a rousing proposal, your words may be received with less enthusiasm. The same is true of your physical proximity to others. If you’re physically close to someone with power, your words will carry greater weight simply because of that proximity. Others will assume that there’s a sense of power bestowed upon you from the power person in the environment.

When negotiating, consider the order of your offers and their alignment with people of power. You can also make a prior offer appear to be better by downgrading the one that follows it – in that case, your message states that the trajectory of the offers to follow will become progressively worse.

Manipulation – A negotiator can gain momentary power through manipulation (for this purpose, the word manipulation is neutral – it’s not good or bad). One can use it to feed the other negotiator’s desires by embellishing the item he seeks from you. By doing that, you heighten his sense to acquire it.

To embellish an item, highlight how the other negotiator will feel, and/or appear to others once he’s acquired it. Take note of his body language as you make your summation. If he slips into a dream-like state while smiling and becoming dreamy-eyed, he’s also imagining the great sensation he’ll experience once he’s acquired your offer – you got him! Continue down that path and extract whatever he’s willing to forgo to acquire the offer. Be careful not to turn embellishment into a lie. That might come back to haunt you.

Likeability – Never underestimate the hidden value of likeability. It’s a factor that has swayed many negotiators. I’ve seen lower offers accepted because of it. It’s easy to be likable with most people – just be pleasant. Warning – with some bully types, you’ll have to meet power with power. Thus, the likeability factor may be a detriment. Instead, seek to become respected – respect will be the source that cedes greater power to you.

 

You’re always negotiating:

In the situation with the manager, mentioned at the beginning of this article, others did exact their toll on him. It occurred when subordinates and his peers combined forces – they informed senior management that they’d no longer work with him. The manager didn’t realize that he’d been negotiating with those folks during his tenure with the company. He used his power recklessly. And now their power was coming to bear against him – senior management fired him.

I love to observe people with power. To be specific, I note how they use it, to whom they extend it, and how they’re altered by it. It’s said that power doesn’t change you – it amplifies who you really are. To that point, always keep in mind, the way you treat people impacts their perception of you. Thus, if they perceive you as an ogre, they’ll be less inclined to assist you in achieving your goals. Therefore, use the sources of power as partners in your negotiations – they’ll increase the perception of you being a powerful person. That will lead to more powerful negotiation outcomes … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

#Body #Language #Secrets #Negotiate #Process #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

 

 

 

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Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Mergers & Acquisition Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“Powerful Body Language Secrets That You Need To Know” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“Every ‘body’ speaks. But not everybody knows what someone’s body is saying – do you?” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

Click here to get the book!

“Powerful Body Language Secrets That You Need To Know”

He was overly impressed with her and her accomplishments. His embrace was meant to display just that – his swell of pride for her. But during the embrace, he felt her attempt to break free as a hostage might do at the first glimpse of freedom. He wondered what he’d done wrong. Later he commented to her about the embrace – and the perception he had of her breaking free. She smiled and said, at least you were aware of it – most people aren’t. I don’t like being hugged.

How attuned are you to the #body #language #secrets that people emit every day? If you are aware of such signals, what do you observe the most and why?

The following are a few body language insights that will allow you to understand people better and become a better communicator.

Head Cocking:

The gesture becomes displayed when someone shifts their head to the right or left after its been in a straight or opposite position. It’s interesting to note when it occurs because it denotes someone going into an inward evaluation. Thus, the gesture may originate from something you said or thoughts the person is contemplating.

Eyebrows:

One eyebrow cocked – This sign usually indicates inquisitiveness as to the possible believability of what’s said or outright skepticism.

Lowered eyebrows – Guarded, deception, annoyance, are the signs that this gesture indicates.

Raised eyebrows – Taking in more of the environment – can also denote surprise or interest (note the degree that the eyes widen – that’ll give you more information as to the thought of the person displaying the gesture.)

Palm Hand Gestures:

Hand up, palm facing out –The hand up and palm facing outward signals nonverbally to the other person to halt what they’re saying or doing. As the receiver of that action, you can gauge the degree of the intent by the distance the action extends from the other person’s body. As an example, if they commit the action and their hand is close to their body, the signal is not as strong as if they had a full-body extension of their hand – that would be a stronger gesture because they’re indicating a greater distance between themselves and what you’re saying or doing.

Palm up and open – Accepting, mentally open to receiving information – can also be internal mental contemplation. It can also be a sign of consternation – this occurs if hunched shoulders accompany the gesture.

Feet:

As a body language signal, feet convey more information than most people are aware of. Thus, you should always be mindful of what someone’s feet are signaling.

Feet aligned – When your feet are in alignment with the person with whom you’re engaged (i.e. both sets of feet are pointing at each other), both of you are succinctly engaged with one another – you’re in mental alignment.

Foot pointing away – As someone points a foot away from you, they’re shifting their weight because:

  • Something else has attracted their attention.
  • They’ve received enough information from you for the time.
  • Soon, they’re going to exit the conversation and do so in the direction their foot is pointed in.

Take note of when such gestures occur. Doing so will allow you the insight to shift and control the conversation.

Conclusion:

At the beginning of this article, I posed the question of how attuned are you to the body language secrets that people emit every day. As you see, there are many signals that you might observe. And, if you’re aware when such signals occur, you’ll have greater insight into the mindset of the people you interact with. That will allow you to better understand them and communicate more effectively. Plus, it’ll give you an insider’s roadmap into their thought process and where it’s headed. That too will allow you to help them upon their journey or exit because you choose not to accompany them. Either way, you’ll have greater control of the environments you’re in … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

#Body #Language #Secrets #Negotiate #Process #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

 

 

 

 

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Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Mergers & Acquisition Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

Shoulder Shrugs Can Expose Scary Secrets in a Negotiation

“Shoulder shrugs expose secret information. Notice them to detect their secrets.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Have you heard the cliché, “what you don’t know can’t hurt you”? If you have, do you subscribe to it? If you do, you shouldn’t. Because, a lack of knowledge can expose you to scary secrets in a negotiation – secrets that can bite you at the most unsuspecting points in the negotiation. But, there’s one way you can protect yourself. How – by accurately interpreting the meaning of shoulder shrugs when you negotiate.

Shoulder shrugs convey secret information. They expose hidden thoughts of the person that’s attempting to hide those thoughts.

Observe the following shoulder shrug examples. You’ll obtain hidden information that those shrugs attempt to conceal.

When a person displays a shoulder shrug, it can represent a multitude of hidden meanings. It can be a sign of reluctance (i.e. what more do you expect of me) – a sign of protection (i.e. I’m not going to stick my neck out) – it can also be a sign of exasperation (i.e. I’m getting tired of this). Regardless of the hidden meaning, it gives additional insight into the thoughts of that person.

Single Shrug: A single shrug can denote a lack of full commitment in response to a question or statement made.

Leaning Preference

  • When displaying a single shoulder shrug, a person will tend to favor their dominant side. This is important to note – because it adds additional meaning to the shrug. As an example, if someone that’s right-handed shrugs their left shoulder, he may be displaying less of a commitment to the response that caused the gesture. As with everything related to reading body language, you must establish someone’s body language foundation before you can accurately assess the validity of their actions.

Double Shrug: A double shrug (both shoulders elevated) can connote more commitment to a reply or statement.

As an example, if one elevated both shoulders while stating, “I didn’t do it”, she’d be displaying more commitment to the statement then if she displayed a single shrug – note: to discern the probability of the truth you should still probe deeper. The act of the shrug is that person’s commitment to her pronouncement at that moment – it can change with further probing.

Leaning Preference

  • When someone performs a double shrug, that person’s hands provide additional insights. As an example, if an offer is made consisting of two items and the recipient says, “I don’t care”, while shrugging with one hand higher than the other, he’s nonverbally expressing a preference for one of the items – the preference lies in the order the items were offered or their proximity to the hand that’s higher.

Additional Shrug Meanings:

Hands: The movement of someone’s hands lends insights into their thoughts. To gather additional awareness per the meaning of a shrug, take note of …

  • hands close to the body – indicates they’re guarded
  • hands palms-up – signals they have less to conceal
  • hands palms-down – they’re less accepting
  • hands palms-up-and-out – says, keep away from me

Head Tuck: To observe how threatened someone might feel when they shrug, note the degree they protect their head when …

  • head extends forward – says, I’ll challenge you
  • head to one side – denotes preference
  • head straight up – states, I’m willing to expose more of myself
  • head tucked – says, I’m making myself less of a target

Of course, the additional shrug meanings can conceal someone’s real intent. That’s because good negotiators can affect this maneuver to add perceived emotional credibility to their effect.

Shrug Time:

Always note the length of time a shrug lasts and the number of times they occur. The length and number of times will indicate a person’s ever-changing degree of angst or determination to get you to back off. In all cases, they’ll be signaling information that you can use to enhance the negotiation.

Action Item:

Start noticing when, under what circumstances, and how frequently people shrug their shoulders. Doing that will increase your attentiveness and skills about this behavior. That will allow you to become a better negotiator … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#ShoulderShrug #secrets #NegotiationStrategies #negotiator #BodyLanguage #Liar #Beware #Negotiate #Process #Power #Powerful #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #BodyLanguageSecrets

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Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

Negotiator: How to Detect Hidden Danger in a Handshake

“Danger lurks in many forms. Don’t let the concealed danger of a handshake endanger you.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert 

“I didn’t come here to learn about handshakes. I came because I wanted to become a better #negotiator.” Those were the unfortunate comments of a seminar attendee. He didn’t realize that he’d overlooked a huge gambit in the negotiation process.

A #handshake conveys important information. The more people exchange them between one another, the more information they convey. It can say, I’m feeling overly optimistic today. It can say, my mood is somewhat deflated. It can also say that I’m going to dominate you because I feel superior today.

Very few people understand the value transmitted when they clasp someone’s hand. Are you aware of such messages when you shake someone’s hand?

After gaining insights from the following information, you’ll never look at, sense, or interpret a handshake as you’ve done in the past.

Wimpy:

Some people equate a weak or wimpy handshake with someone of the same character. Be careful of the assumptions you make.

A weak or wimpy handshake may send a silent message of subservience. It can also be the disguise of someone that’s significantly stronger in character than the handshake conveys. It’s one tactic that good negotiators use to dupe the other negotiator into perceiving a false sense of weakness. That’s done to acquire insight into what the other negotiator might do once she sensed that she was dealing with a mentally weaker opponent.

If you wonder about the validity of such a person, shake hands several times during your interactions. Note the slightest degree of change in the firmness of their handshake. To the degree change occurs, it’ll serve as a barometer indicating a change in character.

Bone-Crushing:

The delivery of a bone-crushing handshake can be an attempt to display strength and dominance. It can be someone’s lack of recognition of their strength related to the hand they’re shaking. It could also be an attempt to conceal weakness.

I recall a business associate telling me that I shook his hand too hard. I knew I possessed a firm handshake but I’d not considered it to be bone-crushing. My associate reiterated his statement a few times. After that, I was always more attentive to not shaking his hand with the prior degree of intensity that I’d used before.

The point is, if you do have a firm handshake, know when to moderate it based on the circumstances. If someone delivers a bone-crushing handshake upon you, and it’s painful, consider saying something. Then, note if any change occurs. If it does, the person is displaying more alignment with you. If it doesn’t, the person doesn’t care how you feel. In either case, you will have gained valuable insight into the person.

Releasing:

The person controlling a handshake is the one that releases it last. A handshake on average last about five seconds. Thus, the person holding the hand of the other individual the longest is stating that they’re not ready to release that person.

Take note when someone extends a handshake pass what’s normal for the situation. They may be sending a subliminal message that they’re superior. They might also be holding your hand longer to comfort you or themselves. Therefore, note when such occurs and the situation in which it happens. Doing so will allow you to gain additional insight as to why they’re committing that act.

Conclusion:

In every negotiation, note its beginning through the information sent via a handshake. If you become attuned to its intent, you’ll have greater insight into that person. That insight will add additional information about how you can negotiate better with them … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Danger #Handshake #negotiator #BodyLanguage #Liar #Beware #Negotiate #Process #Power #Powerful #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #BodyLanguageSecrets

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Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

His Body Language Screamed “Alert: Gullible Liar!”

“Reading body language is like seeing someone’s thoughts. Reading body language accurately gives you the ability to know what those thoughts are.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Something about his body language caught my attention. It screamed, liar!

A man entered my car on the train and announced to everyone that he needed $15 for a train ticket to get to his 13-year old daughter. He said she was at a location where the train ended. He went on to say that someone had already given him $2.

One person gave the requester $5. From there, the requester walked through the rest of our car seeking more contributions. One gentleman said to him, ‘sit beside me – I’ll buy you a ticket.’ The requester said, okay, I’ll be right back and kept walking – he made his way out of our car and into the next one on the train. The gentleman that offered to buy the ticket and I looked at one another and smiled. We knew the requester would not be returning, and he didn’t return.

 

What body language gestures do you think the requester might have displayed? The man that gave our train friend $5 was taken in by his story. On the other hand, the man that offered to purchase a ticket suspected the requester’s story was illegitimate.

When reading body language, be observant of your intuition and a person’s gestures. Your intuition is very attuned to detecting lies.

Intuition:

Intuition is a nonverbal silent signal that secretly conveys information. If the signal was audible, you’d liken it to a knock at the door, the ringing of the phone, or a loud noise. In all cases, it attempts to attract your attention – it seeks your higher sense of awareness.

When you have an emotional sensation whose source you can’t identify, don’t discard it. Instead, raise your sense of awareness to become more attuned to the message that’s seeking your attention.

Body Language:

For a perspective of someone’s intent, observe their eyes, head, hands, feet movements.

Eyes – The requester on the train searched people with his eyes to detect easy marks. He was looking for those that smiled and made eye contact. People that lie will go to the extreme of displaying too much or too little eye contact. They may display too much because they’ve heard that people who lie avoid eye contact. In the latter case, they’re not aware of that. So, since they know they’re lying, they attempt to avoid eye contact to conceal it.

Head – When the requester thought someone was empathetic to his plight, he locked onto that suspect and nodded his head in that direction. The head nodding was a subliminal message stating, you and I understand one another.

Hands – Always watch someone’s hands when they’re talking. In the case of the requester, I noted that his hands moved away from him when he professed the desire to get to his daughter. And they stayed there. Had he gestured in the distance where she was supposed to be and then drew his hands back to his heart or chest as he professed his desire to get to her, he would have been more believable. As it was, his gestures said, there is no daughter at the end of the line. He just wants everyone to think there is.

Feet – When it came to the requester’s plea, once he detected that those close to him would not assist, he made quick movements to get away from that area. When someone is lying, they’ll display feet movements that attempt to put distance between themselves and the lying environment they’re in.

Being able to read body language gives you an advantage in any environment – that’s especially true when negotiating. If you’d like to have x-ray type vision that allows you to see inside of someone’s mind, enhance your ability to read body language … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#BodyLanguage #Liar #Beware #Negotiate #Process #Power #Powerful #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #BodyLanguageSecrets

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Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

Are You a Pleasant Experience Easily Forgotten?

“To be someone’s pleasant experience, you must evoke pleasure in them. Its longevity depends on how you extend it.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“What was his name – you know, that guy that made me laugh so much? He was very pleasant. I wish I could remember his name.”

How many times has someone said that about you? If you don’t know, it’s probably because the person that made the statement never reached out to you. You were easily forgotten. No one wants to think they’re easily forgotten – especially after they’ve bestowed pleasant experiences upon someone.

I offer the following suggestions to become more memorable.

  1. Take the time to understand how individuals experience pleasure – Everyone doesn’t have the same sensations and thus, people experience pleasure differently. To put someone in a pleasant state of mind, you must understand their perspective (i.e. what’s funny, what’s sad, what they are seeking, what moves them). Once you have that insight, you’ll have a better idea of how to inflame their pleasure. And they’ll be more likely to remember you as the source that provided it.

 

  1. When someone is in a festive mood, say your name several times during the conversation. As an example, say, “I know you might think, oh Greg your self-effacing humor is hilarious – but Greg says, for me, it’s not hilarious, it’s my life!” (Do that with a shrug of exasperation to add more meaning and humor to your words. Also, using the ‘third person’ (i.e. “Greg says …”) can add a sense of comedy to your statements.). They’ll remember you easier if you repeat your name because your name will become more infused in their mind. And they’ll associate your name with the occurrence.

 

  1. Be engaging to the degree that your demeanor ignites emotions. People become moved to action via the emotions they experience and feel. To be more memorable, seek to arouse pleasant emotions that make people light up – you can detect this in the smile they display. Once they’re in such a state, keep them there through your actions as long as possible.

 

  1. To connect better, match the body language of those you’re connecting with. You may be familiar with the phrase, people like people that are like themselves. There’s truth in that statement because, psychologically, if you’re like someone, they see a reflection of themselves in you. You can enhance the connection when someone’s experiencing pleasure by getting closer to them physically, making the same body gestures they make (i.e. hand movements, facial expressions, reactions), and speaking at the same pace and rhythm. You’ll influence their subliminal perspective by doing that. And that’ll make you more memorable.

 

  1. When people experience pleasure, they associate whoever is around them with that experience. To be more memorable during such occasions, touch people in a manner that will make them feel good about you being with them – I’m not suggesting anything that’s inappropriate. The more sensations you ignite in them, the more memorable you’ll be.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

Not only do you shape a negotiation by what you say, and how you say it, you also shape it through the emotional arousal you awaken in the other negotiator. Thus, to endear yourself, make people remember the pleasant moments they have as you’re negotiating. When you reach a rough patch in the negotiation, you can attempt to put them back into a more pleasurable state by invoking the happier moments they’ve experienced with you. Doing that will help ease the tension in the negotiation and make it a more pleasurable experience. That will also cause others to remember you more fondly … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

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Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How to Use Micro-Expressions to Negotiate Better

“The mind conceals hidden thoughts. Micro-expressions expose them.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Are you aware that you can see the thoughts of other people? It’s not a magic trick. It’s accomplished by observing micro-expressions. Microexpressions are displays of emotion. They last for less than a second. They occur before the brain has a chance to alter the displayed emotion. Thus, the display is a genuine reaction to the stimulus that caused the emotion to be displayed.

There are seven microexpressions that are generic to everyone on the planet. That means if a stimulus occurred to someone in Europe or Asia, or anywhere in the world, the reaction would be the same.

This article identifies the seven microexpressions and how their recognition can be used in a negotiation.

Fear – Why do we become frightened? In part, it’s a way we protect ourselves. But fear can be debilitating too. In a negotiation, accurately detecting fear will give you an advantage. To obtain that advantage, you must know what the other negotiator is fearful of.

When detecting genuine fear, look for raised eyebrows, widened eyes, and parted lips with the bottom lip protruding downward.

Anger – People become upset in degrees. When it reaches a point of nontolerance, that’s when it becomes anger.

When negotiating, always be mindful of the other negotiator’s temperament, as well as your own. In both cases, when one loses one’s cool, that person can become irrational. Manipulation can easily occur at that time. Thus, they’re opportunities contained in such a mindset if you know how to advantage your position.

There are two main differences between the displayed microexpressions of fear and anger. With fear, eyebrows are raised and they’re lowered when displaying anger. In addition, with anger, one’s nostrils will flare like what a bull might exhibit prior to charging.

Disgust – In a negotiation, this is a temperament that we see when someone is not in agreement with our statement, offer or counteroffer. The other negotiator may say yes to the offer. But if he has his upper lip lifted and his nose turned up in a wrinkle while doing so, he just displayed the microexpression denoting disgust. It’s important to note the distinction between his words and actions because his statement of agreement is not as firm as his body language is indicating.

Surprise – Expressions of surprise can be good or bad (e.g. That’s better than I thought, or there’s no way I’d go for that.) You can recognize surprise by raised eyebrows, wide eyes, and a mouth that’s agape. Fear and surprise have these characteristics in common.

When negotiating, note if the expression of surprise stems from happy or sad expectations. If the other negotiator is too happy about an offer you’ve extended, you might consider reducing it.

Contempt – This gesture is conveyed by a sneer with one corner of the mouth turned upward. The meaning is, “I’m not enamored with this – I might think it’s insulting.’

Take note when you observe this gesture because it can lead to disgust and then anger.

Sadness – When sadness is displayed it’s done through drooping eyelids, lips turned down, and a change in the voice’s inflection and tonality.

If a negotiator displays sadness, it may stem from him realizing that you have the upper hand and there’s no negotiation wiggle room. If that’s a reality, don’t beat him up. You don’t want to turn that into anger, which might lead to unimagined responses.

Happiness – You’ll see this in the form of wide-eyes, a smile, raised cheeks, and a degree of exhibited gaiety.

When perceiving happiness, take note on what caused it but don’t let your guard down. If it’s genuine, you’ll sense an easy flow in the negotiation. If contrived, it may be an attempt to lull you into a false sense of security.

Negotiators look for advantages in every negotiation. Being able to accurately detect microexpressions can be the advantage you need. So, if you want greater advantages during your negotiations, look for the advantages that microexpressions offer. You’ll be a greater negotiator with greater outcomes … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.co 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

# microexpressions #Power #Powerful #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How to Out-Negotiate and Understand Powerful Handshakes

“When someone shakes your hand, take note of what their other hand is doing. Their other hand heightens the meaning of the handshake.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“During our introduction, I felt uneasy. There was something in his handshake that made me think that he was attempting to project himself as being powerful. I wasn’t really sure what that handshake meant but I knew he was sending me a message.” Those were words spoken by a team member when recalling how he felt at the outset of a negotiation.

Handshakes convey hidden meanings. They are one aspect of body language that people should pay more attention to. They can make you feel powerful, be perceived as powerful, or make you appear weak.

Continue reading to discover the hidden meanings conveyed simply by shaking someone’s hand.

Meaning of Handshakes:

  • Hand on Top – One hand on top of the other person’s hand

    • Normally, the person whose hand is on top is signaling superiority. But, allowing one’s hand to be on the bottom can be a ploy to allow the other person to believe he’s in a superior position.

  • Hard – One that appears to be overbearing

    • A hard handshake can be a sign of attempted intimidation. It can also stem from someone that is naturally strong and unaware of the strength they convey when shaking someone’s hand.
    • One’s perception is what denotes the degree that a handshake is strong or overbearing. If you’ve had prior encounters with the other party and have shaken their hand, you have a basis for comparison in the present situation. If you don’t have that comparison, consider what a normal handshake would be like from someone of the same size, gender, and background.

  • Weak – Lacking power, dainty, gentle

    • Weak handshakes convey the exact opposite meaning of those that are hard. Again, don’t necessarily infer that someone is weak because they deliver a weak handshake. It may be the way they wish you to perceive them at the outset of your meeting.

  • Hand/Arm Jerk – While shaking the hand, a quick movement is made that pulls the hand quickly in a jerking motion in one direction and then pushes it backward in the opposite direction.

    • Sometimes, in a playful setting, friends will engage in such banter. In negotiation settings, this gesture is most likely a subtle signal that the one exhibiting it plans to keep the other negotiator off guard. Take note when receiving such gestures and compare it to what follows.

  • Firm – Not too hard, not too soft, both hands parallel to each other

    • In a negotiation, negotiators state through this gesture that they’re equal and respectful of each other.

The person holding the handshake the longest is the one controlling it – they’re stating that they’re not ready to let go. A normal handshake usually lasts for 3 to 5 upward and downward movements. Any more is excessive, which means it’s being done for a reason.

Here’s the rub. Just because someone extends a weak handshake doesn’t make them weak, nor does a strong handshake make them strong.  It can all be a ploy. That means you can use this ploy as a tactic in your negotiations.

By understanding the meaning of handshakes, you understand more of what’s occurring. Thus, when someone shakes your hand, you can respond based on how you wish them to perceive you. That will alter the setting of any negotiation. That will also empower you … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Handshake #Power #Powerful #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions