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What Frequency Are You On?

“The frequency you’re tuned to determines what you hear and how you act. Be attuned to the frequency that serves you best, when it’s the best that you need to serve you.” –Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“… We just can’t seem to #communicate! I don’t know what’s wrong with you.” Such were the sentiments of one person to the other.

Being on the same frequency as someone that you’re attempting to communicate with, is essential for the transmission of your thoughts and ideas; it’s also pertinent for the assembly of the other person’s thoughts and ideas. If you’re not on the same frequency, at best you’ll misconnect, at worse, you can destroy a relationship.

As my astute friend and thought leader David Dadian, CEO of #Powersolution states when referring to frequency, there’s a commonness to the words one uses when communicating with someone else. That commonness enhances the communications; that, in turn, decreases the incidents of #miscommunications. Thus, when people are on the same frequency, they’re communicating on the same level, they’re tuned to the same station, the same network. One is not at 97.5, while the other is at 107.2.

One way to determine that you’re on the same frequency is by the energy level you experience. A higher energy level of experience denotes a positive flow, while a low level can be the signal of miscommunications. A low level also tends to drain people of their energy.

The next time you’re engaged in what you determine to be a serious conversation, note the level of energy present. Even if you’re discussing something of sorrow or glee, they’ll be a degree of energy that’s locked into the exchange of thoughts and ideas. As long as you can relate that energy to being on the same frequency, you’ll know, at least, that you’re really communicating with the other party. If you observe a whimsical appearance, displays of confusion, or any sign that the person with whom you’re speaking is not getting your message, that will be an indication that there’s a frequency mismatch. That should also serve as a signal to reconnect; you’ve lost your WiFi.

When it comes to frequency, the better you and your partner are attuned to the same station, the greater the chance you’ll communicate at a higher level than otherwise would be the case … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

In every negotiation, the outcome rest on your ability to communicate effectively with your counterpart. Some people don’t communicate as efficiently, because they allow mitigating circumstances to sideline their efforts. That can come in the form of not liking someone appearance, ethnicity, gender, etc.

To enhance your negotiation efforts, be attentive to the distractions that might prevent you from being on the same frequency as your negotiation partner. When both of you reach that plateau, you’ll sense it. It’ll be like the two of you just click when exchanging offers and counteroffers. That’ll also be the time to pursue your negotiation objectives more fervently. That’s the power of being on the same frequency. You and the other negotiator will hear the same things, and you’ll be using common words to speak the same language.

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

What are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #Psychology #Perception #rejection #leadership #HowToImproveYourself #Communication

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Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How To Make Powerful Heart Gestures In A Negotiation

“When it comes to matters of the heart, nothing will matter unless you control the emotions that creep from your heart.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“… and he had the audacity to touch his heart with the back of his hand.”

Where body language is concerned in a negotiation, heart gestures are powerful moves because they’re supposed to connote sincerity. When done correctly, they suggest that the purveyor is being honest and forthright. Here’s the rub. Good negotiators are aware of the potency of this gesture. Some use it to feign sincerity when nothing could be further from the truth.

This article contrasts some of the differences between heart gestures in a negotiation. It also highlights how you can make powerful heart gesture moves when you’re negotiating. If you want to increase your negotiation abilities, take note.

  1. Suspect Heart Gestures:

a. Quick hand movement (hands move towards the heart and then quickly moves away – possibly denoting a quick feeling of emotion/sincerity) Note the point that action occurs to discern the degree of sincerity. If done excessively, an attempt to feign sincerity could be afoot.

b. Non-synchronized hand movement – (hand moves towards heart but not at the pace of speech – denotes lack of sincerity) Speech and body movement are synchronized. A lack of synchronization indicates a lack of forthrightness.

c. Backhanded movement – (more than likely a feigning attempt to nefariously engage you emotionally) This is an unnatural move. The more it’s done, the greater the probability that this trickster negotiator is using this move to solicit your emotions for his dastardly deeds.

  1. Powerful Heart Gestures:

a. Quick hand movement (hands move towards the heart and maintains position for several moments – used to convey surprise or hurt feelings) To add emphasis, lean towards the other negotiator when projecting this action.

b. Synchronized hand movement – (hand moves towards heart at the pace of speech – denotes sincerity) This movement, while capable of being feigned, is more likely a reflection of true emotions being displayed.

c. Hand(s) cupped near the heart – (Attempting to keep one’s emotions in check) Observe the length of time this gesture is maintained. To embolden this move, allow your eyes to become glazed or uncircumspective. This will add to the validity of this gesture.

When engaged in a negotiation, take note of when a negotiator touches his heart and the number of times that he does so. Use this to establish your baseline of how and when, and under what circumstances, you’ll employ this gesture. The purpose of doing so is to become mentally reflective of the other negotiator’s actions. Once you enact your gestures using the intervals that he displayed, your gestures will appear to be more genuine to him.

The heart has been romanticized as the stimuli of our emotional being. To convey your emotional sincerity, let your emotions flow freely when it serves you to do so. If you’re negotiating with someone of like-mindedness, your heart gestures will be heartfelt. They’ll be noted subliminally on the subconsciousness of the other negotiator, if not on a conscious level. That will tend to endear you to her, which will make the negotiation flow less obstructively … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#HeartGestures #NegotiatingWithABully #Bullying #Bully #negotiations #Negotiator #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #PowerNegotiation

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How In-Depth Is Your Communication Planning?

“To communicate more effectively, do so based on the mindset of the recipient.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Before communicating with someone, what factors do you consider? Too much information, or information not delivered in the manner expected, can go unconsumed. Too little information can meet the same fate; it can also lead the receiver to seek more insight. So, what should you do to enhance your communication efforts?

Determining the degree of information to bestow upon anyone is guided by many factors. Consider the following factors to enhance your communications.

1. Environment

Always consider your communication environment. One that’s too loud or too quiet might incite unintended distractions, which may impact the reception of your message. Depending on the message and your anticipated impact, assess the best environment to deliver it, based on the person to whom you’re delivering the message.

2. Character/Trust

Knowing the character of the person with whom you’re conversing will determine the depth of information you’ll be willing to share. If trust is not a factor, you’ll be more likely to disclose more insights.

If you know you’ll be in a future situation with someone whose trust has not been vetted, or someone whose trust you question, before giving them the ‘inside story’, give them tidbits of information and see what they do with it. You can accomplish this with multiple people by giving each a slightly different version of the same information, stated as a secret that they shouldn’t share; then, see what version comes back to you through other sources. The originator’s signature will be embedded in the version that comes back. Therein will lie an assessing barometer that indicates the degree of trust you can associate with that person.

3. Mood

A person’s mood can change at any moment. That change influences their perception of information.

To enhance your communications, deliver messages based on the mood of the recipient and how your message ties into that mood. If need be, alter their mood before making your delivery.

As an example, if you have to deliver bad news, avoid times when the receiver is in a depressed state. Do this, unless you’re offering insights that you want him to address that’ll enhance his state of mind. To the degree you control the delivery of information, you control the state of mind you’ll put someone into.

4. Objective

When it comes to parsing information, always consider your objective and outcome sought before doing so. If the mood, character of the person, or environment is not right for the delivery, abstain from doing so. Rushing forward at inopportune times can severely detract from the message and your objective of delivering it. In some cases, you may want to give a snippet of information as a ‘coming attraction’. That’s one way to set the stage for what’s to follow.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

In a negotiation, the factors that determine the impact of an offer/counteroffer are determined by the factors mentioned above. If the mood is one of hostility, there may not be the degree of acceptance to an offer then if the mood was more upbeat and open. If there’s trust in the character of the person you’re engaged with, you’ll extend more trust when such is the pivotal point upon which a negotiation may hinge.

In order to engage in more successful negotiations, you should tend to the factors above. They’ll enhance your negotiation efforts … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

What are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #Psychology #Perception #rejection #leadership #HowToImproveyourself #Communication

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Negotiations News and Politics Sales Women In Business

How To Best Combat Misinformation and Disinformation in Negotiations

“Misinformation can be disinformation. Know the difference between the two to better address the inherent intent of its dispenser.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Someone once said, “All is fair in love, war, and #negotiations.” If that’s true #misinformation and #disinformation are armigers that some negotiators use as weapons of mass destruction.

In order to best combat misinformation and disinformation in negotiations, you must know the difference between the two before you can address either. The question is, to what degree are you prepared to deal with this type of ploy?

Misinformation can be daunting when deciphering the truth. Coupled with disinformation, the truth can become darn near undetectable. Observe the following to make the distinction less elusive.

1. Misinformation Versus Disinformation

Understand that there’s a difference between misinformation and disinformation. While the distinction between the two may have similar appearances, their usage is what really sets them apart.

Misinformation is erroneous information delivered to intentionally or unintentionally alter your thought process. It can also be used as a way to insulate one’s self (e.g. I didn’t mean to misquote that information). Later in the negotiation, that tactic can turn into a trap that detracts from the user’s credibility, if used too frequently.

Disinformation is the intentional attempt to spread false information for the purpose of deceiving you. That makes its usage more dangerous in a negotiation. It also speaks to the character of its user. If you know the user’s intent to persuade you, you’ll have insight into which of these modalities he may use to accomplish his objectives.

2. Know Character of Negotiator

When you know someone’s character, you can more accurately assess and determine their intent. Thus, knowing a negotiator would not venture into the territory of disinformation could lead you to be more understanding if he misquotes information. On the other hand, if you know you’re dealing with a devious individual, one that doesn’t have a relationship with the truth, you’d be wise not to grant him forgiveness when he misquotes information. In such a case, you may have just caught him in a lie that he’s aware of. Let him stew in this dilemma and assess what he does. Doing so will also give you great insight into the possibility of the information being disinformation or misinformation. You can further address the type of information that’s being passed to you by referring to a higher authority that refutes what’s been delivered. You can do this, even if the authority and/or information you cite is not real. It’s called bluffing.

3. Identify Timing and Intent

After addressing steps 1 and 2, assess the intent of the information that you’ve been given. Do so with the thought of what impact it’s intended to have on you, what actions are you to engage in as the result of the information. Also, consider the timing of its deliverance. If you assess that it’s intended to evoke a particular action or thought, assess what the overall intent might be and where such actions might lead. If you sense that something’s not right, don’t continue. Instead, question what you should be paying more attention to.

While misinformation and disinformation may offer challenges during a negotiation, being mindful of how to combat them can lessen their potency. Once you adopt a heightened mindset when dealing with them, your negotiation efforts won’t be fraught with the degree of dismay that otherwise might exist. Thus, by adopting these strategies when dealing with information, you’ll have a better perspective about the information you deal with … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#NegotiatingWithABully #Bullying #Bully #negotiations #Negotiator #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #CombatDisinformation

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Accounting Best Practices Growth Health and Wellness Human Resources Management Taxes

Travel and Entertainment Business Expense Deduction Summary

The 2017 Tax Cuts and Jobs Act made some major modifications to the travel, entertainment, taxable fringe benefits and moving expense deductibility for taxpayers. Above is a summary that shows the difference in the current deductibility (or inclusion in income for employees) for certain of these deductions.

At GROCO, we assist high net worth clients and their families with wealth creation, family transfers, taxes and charitable giving. Please give me a call at 510-797-8661 if you need assistance or have questions on these new rules or would like to know how to make, keep and/or transfer your wealth.

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Accounting Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Skills Women In Business

What You Need to Know About Negotiation Fallacy Dilemmas

“Fallacy dilemmas are only dilemmas to the degree that you allow them life. Test them and you’ll determine to what degree they live.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

When negotiating, you should always be aware of fallacy dilemmas. In a negotiation, fallacy dilemmas are offers presented as either/or propositions, whose propositions are opposite one another. They’re presented in such a manner that they seem to be the only available options.

In discussing fallacy dilemmas with some negotiators, they’ve stated that identifying and using fallacies in a negotiation can be confusing. This article will give you insights into how you can engage successfully with them.

Here’s the challenge with fallacy dilemmas, when negotiating such propositions can be positioned to direct your thought process towards either of the options presented. In reality, there may be a number of other possible solutions that get excluded from your thought process simply because you’re being directed to consider only the proposition offered. Thus, other possible solutions are never considered. That’s why you should be mindful of when fallacies are presented.

Nevertheless, while being mindful of fallacy dilemmas being used against you, they can be an extremely useful tool to have. If you employ this tactic/strategy at the right time, you can enhance your negotiation efforts.

How to guard against fallacy dilemmas in your negotiations. 

Most know the premise, if you’ll lie you’ll cheat, and if you’ll cheat you’ll steal! If you accept that premise as a truism, you’re susceptible to the fallacy.

While it may be true that liars who cheat may also steal, or engage in any combination of nefarious activities, it doesn’t mean that every cheater steals, etc. That’s the dilemma of the fallacy.

Therefore, to guard against fallacy dilemmas during a negotiation, don’t accept any proposition as having only two alternatives.

Note: If you’re in the thick of a negotiation and you sense you’re being forced into thinking that there’s only to options, pause. Take time to reflect. Observe what the other negotiator does. If he attempts to push you into making one of the decisions offered, consider slowing the negotiation down by being more deliberate about your options.

How to use fallacy dilemmas in your negotiations.

You know how to guard against this dilemma, flip it to employ its usage against the other negotiator. To be most effective, consider presenting it in two ways.

  1. Quantitative – Use this type of offer when you want to limit the other negotiator’s perspective to a specified range (e.g. would you rather have zero or a thousand); this offer excludes the fact that through payment terms or other arrangements, he might be able to garner more than a thousand.
  2. Qualitative – Implement this method when attempting to alter the emotional mood of the other negotiator (e.g. would you rather walk away with nothing or something).

Body Language – Add value through intonation emphasis.

With body language, in this case nonverbal communication, the words you place greater or lesser emphasis on dictates the importance that those words convey. Such dictation will also convey a sense of importance when presenting your fallacies. As such, consider ahead of time what words you’ll use to convey a sense of needed urgency when making your offers and how that will be of benefit in your fallacy presentation.

Now that you have a greater awareness of fallacy dilemmas (did you catch what I just did about your awareness (i.e. if something is true, it can’t be false)), use them in your negotiations. Know that things get out of control to the degree that you don’t control them. Thus, when presented with an offer consider all of the options associated with the possible solution of that offer … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#NegotiationDilemma #FallacyDilemma #EitherOrDilemma

#NegotiatingWithABully #Bullying #Bully #negotiations #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology

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Accounting Best Practices Entrepreneurship Health and Wellness Human Resources Industries Investing Management Marketing Skills Women In Business

What’s Your Company’s Moral Compass?

Imagine that you’re in the running for a coveted spot in a well-regarded organization for a high-level position. It’s taken you years to get to this place and you really want this job. You wait and wait through the agonizingly long interview process and in the end, you don’t make the grade.

These are the kinds of situations that “try men’s (and women’s) souls.” How you go through the stages of making the decision to apply, to how you tolerate the waiting, to how you manage the disappointment of being overlooked are great indicators of how you handle stress (and life) in general.

This is just one example of how reaching beyond your comfort zone initiates a series of mental challenges. In his book, Flow: The Psychology of Optima; Experience, Michaly Csikszentmihalyi (Harper Collins, New York, NY, 1990)l, spent years researching the question of what makes one happy. Ultimately, according to his findings, the answer to this very illusive inquiry was: “The control of one’s consciousness determines the quality of one’s life.”

In other words, how we internalize and make peace with the myriad of disappointments and loses as well as deal with our successes and celebrations determine our level of satisfaction we experience in our lifespan.

Given that introspection and transformation are such critical factors in every person’s – and ultimately in every company’s well-being, I’m always amazed at how little attention is paid to the recognition of how important this kind of mental training is.

And I specifically use the word “training,” because the mindset needed to weather the ups and downs of life are not natural. Our brains are wired for danger and spew forth an endless sea of worst-case scenarios. These peak performance skills need to be taught We learn them, either through the school of “hard knocks” – which can take a lifetime – or through parents, teachers, coaches and mentors.

What then, is the role of the company?  Business is business, and the bottom line is the barometer of success or failure.

Yet, the world is changing. The balance of power is shifting, and employees are demanding a more human approach to their work experience – which is in greater synergy to the more spiritual yearnings of mankind. They are asking their companies to honor higher moral values, such as a sense of purpose, respect for family life, racial and gender equality, awareness of individual differences and authenticity, to name a few. In other words, they are asking their organization to be “conscious.”

To be “conscious” means to be transparent, to allow oneself to be vulnerable, to accept responsibility for one’s own behavior and to be on the path of continuous personal and transformational growth. Where is your company on this moral compass?

Here are three ways you can begin to tackle this worthy challenge:

1. Make Your Own Personal Growth a Priority

Wherever you are in the hierarchy of leadership, ask yourself, “Where am I on my own path of personal growth?” Have I invested my efforts to be the best person I can be? Do I have a trusted advisor that helps me see my own blind spots? Every highly successful person I know has someone in their corner who helps them navigate those precarious situations that keep them up at night.

2. Listen to your employees.

Goal setting is a common measure of performance in companies. But when people don’t reach their goals, do you really know why they don’t? There are ways of increasing the level of meaningful communication between managers and employees that go way beyond the traditional semi-annual or annual reviews. Beaconforce, a startup here in San Francisco is one of those innovative companies that have a great solution to this problem.

3. Train Your Employees for the Olympics

As I mentioned above, a resilient mindset is critical for sustainable growth. It may sound like Utopia, but imagine you had an entire organization of individuals who had the mental fortitude to handle the daily pressures of work and life outside of work. Did you know that $1 billion is lost in productivity in the US alone due to stress-related absences? These stress management and peak performance skills, as I said, can be learned. Be that company who understands, appreciates, and puts into action, the concept that all change in your organization and the world, begins with each and every individual having a healthy and resilient mental mindset.

If you’d like to dive deeper to learn more about your own level of Peak Performance skills, go to http://masteryunderpressure.net or join our Facebook community at Mastery Under Pressure Community.

Or contact me directly for a 30-minute complimentary consult at tina@tinagreenbaum.com

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Accounting Economics Entrepreneurship Industries Investing Management Personal Development Taxes

Highlights of the 2017 Tax Cuts & Jobs Act

CHANGES TO INDIVIDUAL RATES AND BRACKETS– lowered top bracket from 39.6% to 37%

  • Married Individuals highest bracket starts at $600,000; Single Individual $500,000; Trust and estate $12,500
  • NEW-Dependent children aged 18-24 in school must use trust rates not Parent’s rate
  • Capital gains rates remain unchanged
  • NEW-three year holding period for carried interest distributions, sales or redemptions for Long-term capital gains
  • AMT thresholds increased

CHANGES TO INDIVIDUAL DEDUCTIONS

  • Only deductions available: medical expense, Interest expense, charitable deductions and tax expense and business casualty loss
    • Taxes limited to total of $10,000; Mortgage debt for existing loans limited to $1,000,000 and New home purchase $750,000.  Cash contributions limit increase from 50% to 60% of adjusted gross income
  • No longer deductible expenses-Alimony paid for and alimony received under divorce contracts entered after 2018, tax prep fees, employee business and investment expenses and other miscellaneous itemized deductions moving expenses; personal casualty theft loss except for federally declared disasters
  • New 529 plans for elementary or secondary public private or religious schools.
  • Like kind exchanges now limited only to Real property so fast-food restaurant franchise licenses and patents; aircraft, vehicles, machinery and equipment, railcars, boats, livestock, crypto-currency, artwork and collectibles are no longer eligible.
  • Current year business operating losses including passive losses limited to $500,000 joint and $250,000 for other filers.  Anything in excess cannot offset capital gain or investment income.
  • No carryback of Net operating business losses. Carryforward of future losses limited to 80% of taxable income.
  • Increased limits for expensing capital assets up to $1,000,000 for new & used property.
  • Non-owner of some private company employees may get up to 5 years to defer income on exercise of stock options or RSU’s.

CHANGES TO ESTATE TAX

  • Life time gift & GST exemption-2018 $11,200,000 single & $22,400,000 married couples.  Will be adjusted for inflation each year.  
  • Annual gift tax amount-2018 Increased to $15,000

CHANGES TO BUSINESS (SCHEUDLE C) AND PASS THRU ENTITIES

  • NEW- 20% deduction for pass thru or Schedule C qualified business income done at individual level
  • Limitation of business interest deduction limited to 30% of the business’s adjustable taxable income, exception for real estate companies who elect longer depreciable life for real estate.
  • NEW-Taxpayer’s average $25 million gross receipts- can use cash method of accounting and don’t have to use UNICAP rules for inventory capitalization.

At GROCO, we assist high net worth clients and their families with wealth creation, family transfers, taxes and charitable giving. Please give me a call at 510-797-8661 if you need assistance or have questions on these new rules or would like to know how to make, keep and/or transfer your wealth.

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Accounting Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations News and Politics Women In Business

Do You Know How to Negotiate With a Bully?

“When negotiating with a bully, assume nothing and question everything.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Negotiating with a bully, or anyone that acts in an obstinate manner can be a difficult proposition. Such encounters can leave you haggard, bewildered, and in a sense of bedazzlement. Stated simply, it can leave you emotionally drained. But, if you know how to negotiate with a bully, you don’t have to risk jeopardizing your sanity or peaceful state of mind.

When you find yourself negotiating with a bully, consider employing the following strategies to lessen his impact.

1. First, identify why the bully feels he can bully you. There’s something that he’s perceived about your demeanor that marks you as a target. Once you discover that, you can alter your demeanor to appear more formidable. Just an FYI, you should alter his perspective of you prior to entering into the negotiation.

2. Understand his source of power. A bully’s mindset is one of picking on people that he perceives to be weaker than himself. His perception stems from his support system (i.e. those that back him), along with his perspective of what he’s achieved versus what he perceives you to possess (e.g. he has friends in higher places, more money, greater status, etc.) To combat his perception, create the persona of someone that’s also connected. You can do this by emulating the bully’s support system.

3. Appear fearless when such is required. A bully will ‘push your buttons’ to discover ways to manipulate you. Everyone is familiar with the schoolyard bully. He picks on the kids that won’t stand up to him. When they do, he usually moves to a target that is less challenging. When dealing with a bully in a negotiation, you have to be defiant when defiance is called for. Remember, the bully will only push you to the point that you allow him and, he’ll continue to push as long as you allow him. Unfortunately, history has taught us this lesson time and time again when dealing with tyrants; tyrants are nothing more than bullies with a bigger platform.

4. Observe body language – In particular, look for nonverbal signs of submission and those that are out of sync with his verbiage (e.g. bully leaning away from you when making a demand – potential sign of him retreating and testing your resolve, softening his demeanor when he senses that you’re displaying backbone, making request with ending statement sounding like a question). Such observations will give you greater insight into what his next action(s) might be and his psyche.

5. Consider how you can have embedded commands in your offers, suggestion, and/or concessions. As an example, observe the statement in bold in the first paragraph of this article. It states, ‘you know how to negotiate with a bully’. Such subliminal messaging may not be observed by the conscious mind, but they will be perceived at a subconscious level. Therein is where it can have an influence on the other negotiator. To combine the effects, lace several subliminal messages together. Use them as needed and apply them judiciously.

While negotiating with a bully can be trying, if you employ some of the suggestions mentioned above, you can decrease the bully’s effectiveness. In so doing you’ll make yourself less desirable from being targeted for bullying by the bully … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#NegotiatingWithABully #Bullying #Bully #negotiations #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology

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Economics Entrepreneurship Human Resources Industries Investing Management Marketing Personal Development

The Long, Hard Road

I recently interviewed Rick Wartzman for my Business Builders Show podcast. Rick is the Director of The KH Moon Center for a Functioning Society at the Drucker Institute, a part of Claremont Graduate University. Rick has written a great book, The End of Loyalty, The Rise and Fall of Good Jobs in America.  This book has 363 pages and 25 pages of citations and sourcing. This is a very well -written, well documented account of the topic of the book. At the beginning of the interview I pointed out that he started the book in 2009 and it was not published until 2017. I asked him why did it take that long? After he made a joke about him being “slow”, he pointed out that it took that long to check on and validate all the information he wrote about in the book. It simply was the long, hard road to get the book done right.

Todays blog from Seth Godin is “Low & Slow (vs.fear)”. He talks about how he rushed the baking of sourdough rye bread. He did not let the dough ferment enough and he turned up the oven, so he could get it done faster so he could meet someone. It did not turn out well. Then he points out a flipside to the story – “Sometimes, we mistakenly believe that we’re building something that takes time, but what we’re really doing is hiding. We stall and digress and cause distractions, not because the work needs us to, but because we’re afraid to ship.”  BTW, remember that Seth Godin has been blogging for I’m not sure how long (a long time) and has not missed a day.

When do we decide to take the long and sometimes difficult road? I see the value in the long view. Just like baking bread correctly, getting a story (your work) right so you can share your insights usually takes time. Be patient. Stay focused. Believe the work you are doing is worthy of the time and effort. So, unless there is an immediate need for speed, consider the long term. Think of the lasting impact your work can have if you take the time to complete all the steps in the process. Those steps will include diligent study, bouncing ideas off family, friends and colleagues and being committed to producing work which will have a positive, lasting impact.

Rick Wartzman, congratulations on taking the time, the long, hard road, to write a terrific book. Seth Godin, slow down and better luck next time with the sourdough rye bread.

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