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How to Negotiate Better and Avoid a Liar’s Beating

 “To avoid beatings, avoid their cause.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

When you negotiate with a liar, be cautious. Identify him as fitting into one of three categories, a habitual liar, a loose attendant with facts, or one that honestly misstates information. There’s a distinct difference between those three mindsets. To negotiate better and avoid a liar’s beating, know those differences and how to address them. This article notes the distinctions and gives insights into doing just that.

Habitual Liar

This is the negotiator that will lie for the pleasure of deceiving you. He obtains a ‘high’ when viewing himself as a master trickster. He’s also the most dangerous negotiator type that you can encounter because, at times, he’ll lie just to be lying. Don’t let your guard down with this type of negotiator. If you do, you may pay a high cost for your lesson.

Loose with Facts

The negotiator who uses facts loosely may be someone that seeks to sway you with information. He may do so if he senses your logic is driven by data. In his attempts to sway you, he may quote statistics and/or facts that aren’t as valid as he professes them to be.

If you suspect he’s playing loosely with facts, pull out your mobile device. Ask your favorite Internet site about the validity of his statement. Do that in front of him. You may have to do that a few times. He’ll get the hint that you’re not someone swayed by the tactics he’s employing.

Misstates Information

Something that’s stated as the truth is a lie if it’s not true. And, everyone misstates facts at times. This may occur due to faulty memory. Because of that, your guard doesn’t have to be as high as with the other two types. Nevertheless, you should still note the degree of misstatements he makes. If he projects a demure demeanor while doing so, he may be using that as cover to hide his deceit.

Test the Liar

Regardless of the liar type, test him. As an example, cite an erroneous fact pertaining to the negotiation. Observe what he does with it.

  • The habitual liar may embellish it, or attempt to use it to his advantage quickly; this may occur at any point in the negotiation.
  • The loose fact individual may extend your version while waiting to see where it might lead; he’s not ready to bite on your bait. If he brings it up later, note when he does so. That’ll be an insight into how he plans to use such information.
  • The misstates facts person may not say anything; that could be a clue that he’s not overly enamored with facts or the lies that extend from them. But, if he attempts to use the erroneous information to his advantage, consider moving him into one of the other categories.

If you sense deception, use the web the other negotiator is spinning to capture you, to ensnare him. To do that, if you’re speaking in-person, watch his expressions. Observe the degree his eyebrows rise; to the degree they do so, you will have surprised him. Note what he does next (i.e. stammer, clears his throat, rubs his eye(s)). Those gestures will indicate that he knows you’ve caught him. And he knows that you know it.

In every negotiation, a negotiator will lie to some degree. You should be most concerned with those that continuously lack conformity to the truth. They’re the ones that will attempt to expand the negotiation pie, only to steal it from you in the end. Thus, the more adept you are at recognizing and knowing how to negotiate better to avoid a liar’s beating, the less likely you’ll incur that beating … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Liar #Avoid #Beating #Negotiator #Negotiations #bodylanguage #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How to Win More Negotiations by Framing Better

 

“Framing is the impactor on one’s sensibility.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

When framing anything, the better the frame, the greater the chance for a successful outcome. Consider a wall, versus a fence, versus a barrier. You can use all of them to protect those that are inside. They can also be what keeps those on the other side from gaining entrance. And, you can state that they can protect those on either side. So, what’s the difference from a framing perspective? The difference lies in the perception of how you define the barrier. That’s why framing is so important.

When you frame content to be discussed in a negotiation, your framing of it determines how it will be perceived, how it will be discussed, and how the negotiation will flow.

The following are a few insights you can use to win more negotiations by framing them better. Doing so will increase your chances of having a winning negotiation outcome.

Value Proposition:

Before you attempt to frame a discussion, you should know what someone’s value proposition is. Because, if you make a concession that’s not perceived as being valuable, you might open yourself to a greater request (e.g. I don’t need that, but how about ‘x’). If you’d not intended ‘x’ to be discussed, you could have framed your offer by stating, I can concede on this, but not ‘x’. By doing that, you take ‘x’ off the table before it has the chance of entering the offer proposition. Mind you, the other negotiator can still request to have it, but you will have set a marker for denying him his wish. If you’ve used it as a red herring, you may turn the perception of its value to a greater benefit to your position. Then, if you wish to concede it, you should request something substantial in return.

Framing Mindset:

“He was right before, isn’t he right now?” Be careful of how you validate or accept a point as being valid. Just because an entity has been right 99 percent of the time, doesn’t mean that it’s right this time. Then again, if the other negotiator subscribes to such a thought, use it to your advantage.

You can do that by stating that you’ll be discussing ‘x’. Then, state that ‘x’ has been proven to have a 99 percent accuracy factor. Framing any point in that manner lends more credibility to it. There’s also a sense of security implied in the statement, because most people like the perceived sense of being surrounded by others.

Combating Opposing Framing:

If it doesn’t serve your purpose, be prepared to refute the framing attempts of the other negotiator. While doing that, have your own talking points ready to rebut his attempts to refute yours.

A good negotiator knows the hidden value that lies in framing a negotiation. Therefore, there will be an aspect of ‘give and take’ as you and he spar over the process you’ll use, and how you’ll frame those processes, to engage in the negotiation. During the planning stage of the negotiation, give serious thought to how you’ll frame your points and the strategies you’ll use to alter the other negotiator’s perspective.

Personas:

How are you going to act? The persona you project during the negotiation, confidence, or a lack of, and when you project that persona, will impact the negotiation. So, you should plan for how and in what circumstances you’ll promote a certain persona versus another. That’s also where framing comes in. If you synchronize the framing with your persona, you’ll have more perceived credibility.

Framing can serve as a silent ally that lies dormant while waiting to lend assistance in positioning the negotiation. When used stealthily, it can be what gives you a hidden advantage that the other negotiator never sees coming. Thus, using it wisely can enhance your chances of winning more negotiations … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Framing #Negotiations #bodylanguage #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

Negotiator – Five Crazy Ways to Prevent Being Burned by a Bully

“To beat a bully, defeat his sources of power.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Dealing with a bully can be daunting, exhausting, and frustrating. It can leave you in a state of anxiety and devoured by stress. But that doesn’t have to be the case. Observe the following 5 crazy ways to prevent being burned by a bully when negotiating.

Three bully types:

  • Hard Core:

This bully type is someone who likely had psychological challenges as a child. He wants the respect and acknowledgment that he’s someone to reckon with.

  • Middle Core:

This individual is someone whose bullying is based on circumstances. While all bullies seek to maximize their efforts based on situational opportunities, this bully type will seek to escalate his situations if giving the chance to do so to become a hard core bully.

  • Soft Core:

A soft core bully is one that’s classified as a bully in training. He’s usually someone that’s enticed into doing things to prove himself to those from whom he seeks approval. He’s what’s known as a useful idiot in intelligence parlance.

It’s to your advantage to know the bully type that you’re dealing with.

Do a good deed:

Most bullies wear their emotions on their sleeves. They want others to like and appreciate them. Studies have indicated, when people are in a positive frame of mind, they’re more receptive to your thoughts and ideas.

If you commit a good deed for a bully before the negotiation, that could endear you to him, which may lead to him having a more positive perspective of you. If so, he may be lax when it comes to emploring bullying tactics against you during the negotiation. As in all cases when dealing with a bully, you should be mindful of how he might react as the result of you doing good deeds for him. Some bullies will interpret such actions as a green light to push you harder.

Group threat:

A group threat can be an assembly of others you amass to threaten the bully or his supporters. In either case, the group you assemble should be perceived as a formidable force that the bully or his followers will have to contend with if he attempts to bully you. It should also be a force that the bully perceives as being threatening to his standing and wellbeing.

Playing field:

Don’t play on the bully’s field. That means, when negotiating with a bully, do so on your own terms. Don’t allow him to dictate where and when the negotiation will occur. If he says, ‘x’, you say, ‘y’. Bullies like tough guys. Show him that’s who you are by the actions you engage in.

Scorched earth:

There will be times when you must stand up to a bully to show him how tough you are. Sometimes, you’ll have to take that to the extreme.

A scorched earth approach to negotiation is one way to display that extreme. It entails positioning yourself as someone that will ‘burn down everything’ if you don’t get your way. After positioning yourself as such, make him fight for every concession you grant him. You want him to feel like he’s really been in a battle during the negotiation. In times of perceived peace, make him wish he’d prepared for war.

Some of the above strategies will work with some bullies and some won’t. By knowing the type of bully you’re dealing with, you’ll have a better idea of how you can prevent him from burning you. Thus, by implementing the strategies above, you’ll enhance your negotiation position. You’ll also be better prepared to thwart the efforts of a bully … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Ways #Weakness #value #Hide #bodylanguage #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

Negotiator Win: Know How to Turn Weakness to Power

“Weakness, like power, is perceptional. Knowing when to display one can expose the other.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Have you ever employed the initial appearance of weakness as a tactic in a negotiation? It can be a great way to gather valuable information. When the other negotiator sees you in a weakened position, that’s the time when you can turn your perceived weakness into a source of power. Observe the following to do so.

The Opening – Setting the Stage:

To set yourself up to be perceived as weak, consider the following strategies.

  • At the opening of the negotiation, offer a weak handshake; this positioning is enhanced by allowing your hand to be on the bottom of the handshake (i.e. the other negotiator’s hand on top of yours). That will subliminally signal subjugation on your part.
  • Project a sense of slowness to grasp points. Don’t overplay your hand. Remember, you’re playing the role of someone that’s not sure of himself.
  • Allow yourself to be maneuvered by making concessions quickly when doing so is not detrimental to your position.
  • Refer to having to consult a higher authority when pushed too hard for a concession; that’ll convey a sense of powerlessness.
  • While engaging in the processes above, seek to uncover the other negotiator’s source(s) of power. You can use that as leverage against him later in the negotiation.

Mid Game – The Turn:

This is the point at which your demeanor transformation begins.

  • Know the strength of your resources compared to your opponent. That will be your source of power. You can use it as leverage during the negotiation to thwart his efforts.
  • During the negotiation, be prepared to refer to a higher authority that trumpets the other negotiator (e.g. him – we reached a multimillion-dollar deal with company x last year, you – we know that and they’re talking with us this year; I guess they didn’t like the results of your deal.)
  • Create a false sense of value with red herrings as chits that you can trade later for items and concessions of importance.

End Game – The Closing:

This is the time you employ tactics that display, you’re no longer a weakling.

  • Begin to use the red herrings you set up in the prior phase to enhance your negotiation position. Be stubbornly diligent when making concessions at this point. Your efforts should send a subliminal message that indicates, you’re going to be a tough negotiator from this point on.
  • Once you’ve engaged in the strategies above, be cautious. You will have transformed yourself from the weakling you initially appeared to be into a titan. The other negotiator will realize that he’s dealing with someone that’s more astute than he originally thought. That will cause him to raise his guard. He’ll also be seeking ways to adjust his negotiation strategies to match his new reality.

The timeframe and phases mentioned above still have to be accompanied with the negotiation strategies that are appropriate for the type of negotiation you’re in. Thus, the outline above should serve as a foundation to which you can add more specifics steps to fit your situation. By using this outline, you’ll be well on your way to creating a roadmap that leads to more successful negotiation outcomes … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Power #Weakness #value #Hide #bodylanguage #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How to Unlock Your Imagination and Win More Negotiations

“To enhance your imagination, don’t shackle it.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

To win more negotiations, you must know how to unlock your imagination. It’s your imagination that will determine how well you do in the negotiation.

As a child, your imagination was limitless and boundless. You could obtain and achieve anything that your imagination could conceive. No matter what it was, all you had to do was imagine it and it became your reality.

You can capture that same sensation when negotiating by using the following insights to heighten your imagination. The heightening of those senses will lead to more winning negotiations.

Know how you think:

When addressing your reasoning skills, do you note if it’s sequential or random; a person with high sequential reasoning skills is better equipped to create a systematic series of actions directed to a specific outcome. You should be aware of the thought process you engage in to maximize your efforts. Doing so will allow you to see the gaps in your imagination, which in turn can lead to heightening your thought process.

Know your senses:

Are you more visual, kinesthetic, or auditory? The answer is dependent on the environment and circumstances. So, how does the environment impact your thoughts? And, in what situations are you guided by one sense versus another? Again, to engage your imagination more effectively, you need to be aware of what and how to ignite it. Having that information will be the key that brings your imagination to life.

Before you can explore the depths of your imagination, you must know how to reach it. Knowing the answers to the questions above will be the conductor that directs you on the path to that opening.

To enhance your imagination process:

Don’t be restrictive with your thoughts. That means, be willing to consider the inconceivable.

Mix elements of your thoughts that may appear not to be related. Even when thinking disparate thoughts, there may be connecting threads that lead to deeper contemplation. Your imagination will reside in that place.

Converse with selected people in your circle that can help you delve deeper in thought.

Heighten your emotional sense of awareness. The more you’re aware of your emotions, the greater the opportunity to control them. Controlling them allows you to alter your perspective, which can lead to an enhanced imagination.

Meditate – Sometimes, your mind becomes so encircled by negative thoughts that you can’t think succinctly. During such times, if you’re at the negotiation table, call a timeout, remove yourself from the table and meditate. Meditation will slow your thought process and allow you to relieve the stress that comes from negative thoughts. Once you feel a sense of serenity, consider sublimating the sublime where your thought process is concerned.

Watch the meaning you assign to an outcome. If you suspect that it will be negative, your thoughts will flow in that direction. Your mind will enter a different thought process than if you’d considered the outcome to be positive. When you’re not sure of an outcome, consider the possibility of it turning out negatively or positively. Prepare for the worse, but don’t dwell on it. Think about the way you think.

When you sense you’re in a negotiation position that generates angst, use the strategies above to unlock your imagination. By unleashing that inner power, you’ll begin to think in a manner that’s more progressive towards winning the negotiation … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Imagination #value #Hide #bodylanguage #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How Do You View Your Time?

“The agency of time is an equal factor for everyone. To maximize time, be wise about how you view and use it.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

What’s your experience with time? How do you view it? Why is it that time appears to move slowly and at other times it appears to move much faster? There’s no secret about the answer. It’s what you do with your time and the perspective you have of it that makes it appear to pulsate.

This will take forever:

Have you observed how long a task takes when you think it’s going to take a longtime? Sometimes, it doesn’t take as long as you expected. When completed, you feel good and think, that didn’t take that long after all. More then likely, you feel good about your accomplishment and the perspective you have of time.

At other times, the task takes significantly longer than anticipated. You encounter impediments that you’d not considered. You become frustrated! In some cases, you pursue the task to completion. At other times, you surrender to what you perceive to be inevitable and throw in the towel.

What’s the end differences? The differences lie in the perception you had before you engaged in the task, what you experienced while addressing it and its outcome. Be mindful of that because it’ll shape your outlook when assessing future task.

I’m stuck:

Do You find yourself doing the same things repeatedly because you’re constantly relearning the same lessons? Do you see your goals moving further away as you attempt to achieve them? For you, time may seem to be a whirling mass that’s sucking you into a vortex. You’re in a rut!

Consider how you might improve your plight and develop a plan to do so. Then, engage your plan and observe the benefits derived from it. If they don’t meet your expectations, modify the plan. Be mindful of how you’re viewing the time spent when doing so. That will impact the view you have about your degree of success.

In the zone:

When you experience happiness, you experience the sensation of euphoria. When you experience prolonged happiness, that transcends into a higher sense of euphoria. It’s likened to being ‘in the zone’, a mental place that eclipses the limits of thought and time. What do you do to experience that sensation? Note what it is and when it occurs, because the more you replicate it, the more improved you’ll become. And, you’ll have a better perspective of what you’re doing with your time.

As you engage in your endeavors, consider how you view the usage of your time. If you note what makes you feel better, versus worse about its usage, you will begin to summit to the pinnacle of utilizing your time better, while feeling better about its usage. That will lead you to experience a higher sense of fulfillment … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

How you view the usage of time in a negotiation will impact the strategies you employ and how those strategies are rebutted by the opposing negotiator. If you view time to be short, you’ll take more drastic measures to get to the end point. That could cause the other negotiator to heighten his sense of time and both of you could find yourselves in a rushed position. That could lead to a calamitous negotiation.

Always be aware of how you view your time and maximize its usage to perceive it as being most beneficial to your cause.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Time #Success #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #liars #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #negotiator

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Negotiators: Beware of the Hidden Danger in Free Value

“There’s always a hidden fee in free. Don’t accept free without knowing what that hidden cost might be.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

As a negotiator, what do you consider when you hear free? Do you think about the hidden danger that may lurk in something that’s free? Sure, there could be value in the offer, but you should also beware of the hidden danger in anything that’s free.

When you hear the word free, your brain goes into a sense of euphoria. The endorphins begin to flow at the thought of receiving something for nothing. In such a mindset, you can become susceptible to lowering your guard. Doing that can leave you vulnerable to unsuspecting ploys. That can occur even when you’ve planned how you’ll address such offers. When you find yourself in such quandaries, consider the following.

What’s the offer attempting to achieve:

People are motivated by their aspirations. Thus, during a negotiation when offers are extended, a goal is at the purpose of that offer. If you’re aware of that intent, you’ll be in a better position to assess its potential value. Offers are not equal. Don’t let one that appears to be free become too costly for you to accept. Examine it thoroughly.

What’s to be gained:

Sometimes, acquiring a concession in a negotiation can add value to your overall goals. If the concession appears not to contain a cost, its allure may become bewitching. Be cautious when such appears to be the case. Good negotiators accumulate chits that they can use at other points in the negotiation. Thus, while you’re receiving what appears to be free, what you’re really receiving could be an IOU.

The timing of the offer:

The timing of an offer can obscure hidden dangers. If the intent is to obtain a greater concession, a negotiator may seek smaller ones to build towards the larger one. Thus, in some cases, positioning may be the goal. That means, offering something for free may be the setup or cover up for something to come.

Always be aware of where a concession or request may lead. Since negotiations are the accumulations of gains and concessions, you don’t want to make a concession thinking that it will lead to more gains. Or, acquire gains that are too costly, compared to the concessions you make to acquire them.

What do you have to concede:

In every negotiation, good negotiators have red herrings to use as chits or diversions. They can serve as bartering pieces that don’t contain a burdensome cost to you, or as distracters from the real intent of your offer. In a best-case scenario, a red herring should be perceived as something of value that you possess that can be dangled as a sought-after desire that the other negotiator wants. The more he’d like to possess it, the greater its perceived value will be. Thus, if it doesn’t cost you anything to relinquish, you can heighten its appeal by feigning great concern to part with it. The point is, don’t weaken red herrings by relinquishing them too easily. Doing so will weaken your negotiation position.

There’s a cost associated with everything we acquire, even if it’s just the time that we invest. Because time itself has a cost. If you keep in mind that nothing’s free, you’ll maintain a more prepared mind to assess the hidden cost and hidden dangers that may be concealed in free offers. Doing so will make you a better negotiator … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Danger #value #free #Hide #bodylanguage #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

What Do You Fear?

“Fear will masquerade as truth until it’s unmasked”. -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Do you know what you’re most fearful of and why? Does fear debilitate you when you’d rather be less susceptible to it? When you find yourself in the clutches of fear, you need to know how to escape it. If not, it will leave you imprisoned and entrapped in a web of despair.

Consider the following the next time you feel fear sneaking up on you.

Inner Child:

There were lyrics to a song that went – ‘little child, running wild …’. All of us carry our inner child with us throughout our life. That inner child can be the source of fearful things you experienced in your formative years that should no longer hold sway over you.

In dealing with your inner child, realize that you’re no longer that person. You’ve evolved. Keep your inner child in check and you’ll be more adaptable to dealing with things that you fear.

Insecurities:

What beliefs temper your insecurities? You should know what they are, why they come into being, and what stimulates them to rise to your consciousness.

Before you can deal with any fears, you must know why they’re prevalent and what gave them life. Once you pinpoint that source, you’ll know to what degree the fear is real or imagined. You’ll also have a better handle on how to deal with them and keep them in check.

Times of Happiness:

During times of happiness, be grateful. Revel in your bliss. But, don’t relax too long. The world continuously evolves, which means you must evolve to stay abreast with the changes that occur in the world.

The point is, the more you recognize when you’re in a state of happiness, the more you’ll focus upon your good fortunes. Doing that will relieve hidden stress, and dissipate fear. That will allow you to experience a greater feeling of happiness. Isn’t that a better cycle to be in?

To enhance your life, know why and when fear becomes ignited in you. To combat it, focus on the times when you were happiest in life. Draw from the lessons learned during those times. Then, mentally summon those happier times to combat fear. By doing that, you’ll recognize when you’re in a good place in your life, and know how to best deal with fear when it comes at you … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

During a negotiation, you and the other negotiator will be motivated by gain and loss at different points in the negotiation. It behooves you to understand when either source of stimulus is present because you need to adopt different strategies to deal with that segment of the negotiation. As an example, the fear of loss can be a potent tool to employ against the other negotiator. Be judicious when doing that so it doesn’t backfire on you.

By taming fear and using it as a source of motivation in a negotiation, you’ll have a greater grasp of how to control its usage. That will place you in a powerful position throughout the negotiation.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Fear #Success #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #liars #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #negotiator

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Best Practices Body Language Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How to Observe Body Language to Uncover the Truth

“To uncover the truth, expose its darkness.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

When you negotiate, what body language gestures do you observe to uncover the truth? Do you seek insights from gestures, intonations, and other signs to validate when you suspect the truth is being violated? If so, exactly what do you look for?

You can gain great insight about someone’s truthfulness via their body language, and negotiate better, by arming yourself with the following information.

Body Language

Before you can accurately interpret someone’s body language, you must establish their baseline. That baseline will allow you to more accurately assess and compare the body language gestures the other negotiator exhibits more accurately during the negotiation. To form his baseline, observe his mannerisms when he’s in a non-threatening environment.

Our body seeks to maintain a constant state of comfort. When it’s out of that state, it will commit actions to put itself back into that state (e.g. babies cry for attention when they’ve soiled themselves, adults feeling overly aggrieved strike out in anger to get even and soothe themselves, etc.). During the body’s state of discomfort, observe signs like, rubbing of the hands, touching one’s face/neck/arm/leg, etc., to validate the state of mind that person is in; those signs are called comfort gestures. The person emitting the behavior is attempting to comfort himself; that person’s body is attempting to put itself back into a state of comfort.

When you see the gestures noted above, assess what has caused that person to experience discomfort. Was it something he said? If so, he may have entered a state of untruthfulness. If you sense that might be the case, consider questioning him about your suspicion. Or, you can progress the conversation and note when other comfort gestures are exhibited. The second, third, etc., iteration of such signals will add to the possibility that he’s violating the truth.

Intonation

When a person speaks, note their intonations. It will lend insight into what they believe to be more important than other aspects of what they’re saying. As an example, if someone said, “I’m not sure if that’s the whole truth.” The word(s) they placed the most emphasis on would denote what’s important to them. Thus, if the emphasis was on “whole”, there may be more that’s undisclosed. Once again, if you think that’s the case, probe to get to the root of the possible deception.

When it comes to intonations, observe what causes someone to alter their speaking pattern. Remember, the body seeks a constant state of comfort. Thus, if someone alters their speaking pace, they’re doing so due to the stimuli that put them into that mood. The behavior may be due to their contemplating what to say to complete their thought. If you sense they’re concealing the truth, consider how and when you’ll challenge them.

Once you become astute at reading body language gestures, you’ll uncover secret cues that indicate when someone’s not being forthright. You’ll become a human lie detector … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

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Thank You for Your Patience

“Patience can be a virtue; it can also be an enslaver. Know the difference to avoid entrapment.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

How many times have you heard the words, “thank you for your patience”? To a degree, there are times when such words become frustrating. You hear over the intercom, “you’re flight’s been delayed”, thank you for your patience. The train is 33 minutes behind schedule. Thank you for your patience.

In most situations when such words are uttered, thank you for your patience, you’re in a captive position. You can’t do anything but wait. So, why do you think such announcements are made? Do you think there’s a hidden message implied?

Sometimes, the attempt is to keep you calm and feeling like the offending party is sorry for the dilemma they’ve caused. They’re soliciting empathy to soften you to the plight you find yourself in. In other times, they’re genuinely sorry.

So, what can you do to pushback on such psychological ploys? In some cases, you can say, I appreciate the sincerity of your statement, can you please do ‘x’? In this case, ‘x’ is something that you might want due to the inconvenience you find yourself in. That request is nothing more than a test to assess their sincerity.

Depending on the circumstances, you might be surprised at what you’re granted. The point is, words are used to influence emotions. In this case, they could be used to assuage the hostile feelings that may be swirling in you due to the circumstances. To allay those feelings and test your negotiation skills, ask the other party to show through action how sorry they are. You can request anything that pleases you. I’ve done it by asking for a penny. The request got a laugh, which made the situation more tenable. It changed the outlook I had and that of the other party.

When you find yourself in a position of helplessness, due to situations that you perceive to be out of your hands, take actions to control them. You’ll be amazed at how well you feel … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations? 

In a negotiation, the words, ‘thank you for your patience’ can be a way to subdue a request for concessions, or slow the negotiation process down. It can also suggest genuine sincerity for an indiscreet remark or action. The point is, you need to understand the real meaning of someone’s conveyance to assess the purveyor’s true intent. Without validation, you could misperceive that intent, which can cause the negotiation to take an unexpected turn.

First, consider the mindset you possess; your current state of mind will influence your perspective. Next, consider the person with whom you’re negotiating. Has she displayed an ill temper throughout the negotiation, or a demeanor that’s been non-threatening, passive, and one of conciliation?  Take into account what has occurred prior to that point; the closer you are to a point of exasperation, the less likely you are to being in an understanding mindset. That means if you’ve been riled throughout the negotiation, or at a point that’s not too distant, you’ll be more likely to seek retribution and less likely to offer forgiveness.

Always be mindful of the intent of the other negotiator. It’s through that understanding that you’ll gain insight into the real person with whom you’re negotiating.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

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