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How to Negotiate Better and Avoid a Liar’s Beating

 “To avoid beatings, avoid their cause.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

When you negotiate with a liar, be cautious. Identify him as fitting into one of three categories, a habitual liar, a loose attendant with facts, or one that honestly misstates information. There’s a distinct difference between those three mindsets. To negotiate better and avoid a liar’s beating, know those differences and how to address them. This article notes the distinctions and gives insights into doing just that.

Habitual Liar

This is the negotiator that will lie for the pleasure of deceiving you. He obtains a ‘high’ when viewing himself as a master trickster. He’s also the most dangerous negotiator type that you can encounter because, at times, he’ll lie just to be lying. Don’t let your guard down with this type of negotiator. If you do, you may pay a high cost for your lesson.

Loose with Facts

The negotiator who uses facts loosely may be someone that seeks to sway you with information. He may do so if he senses your logic is driven by data. In his attempts to sway you, he may quote statistics and/or facts that aren’t as valid as he professes them to be.

If you suspect he’s playing loosely with facts, pull out your mobile device. Ask your favorite Internet site about the validity of his statement. Do that in front of him. You may have to do that a few times. He’ll get the hint that you’re not someone swayed by the tactics he’s employing.

Misstates Information

Something that’s stated as the truth is a lie if it’s not true. And, everyone misstates facts at times. This may occur due to faulty memory. Because of that, your guard doesn’t have to be as high as with the other two types. Nevertheless, you should still note the degree of misstatements he makes. If he projects a demure demeanor while doing so, he may be using that as cover to hide his deceit.

Test the Liar

Regardless of the liar type, test him. As an example, cite an erroneous fact pertaining to the negotiation. Observe what he does with it.

  • The habitual liar may embellish it, or attempt to use it to his advantage quickly; this may occur at any point in the negotiation.
  • The loose fact individual may extend your version while waiting to see where it might lead; he’s not ready to bite on your bait. If he brings it up later, note when he does so. That’ll be an insight into how he plans to use such information.
  • The misstates facts person may not say anything; that could be a clue that he’s not overly enamored with facts or the lies that extend from them. But, if he attempts to use the erroneous information to his advantage, consider moving him into one of the other categories.

If you sense deception, use the web the other negotiator is spinning to capture you, to ensnare him. To do that, if you’re speaking in-person, watch his expressions. Observe the degree his eyebrows rise; to the degree they do so, you will have surprised him. Note what he does next (i.e. stammer, clears his throat, rubs his eye(s)). Those gestures will indicate that he knows you’ve caught him. And he knows that you know it.

In every negotiation, a negotiator will lie to some degree. You should be most concerned with those that continuously lack conformity to the truth. They’re the ones that will attempt to expand the negotiation pie, only to steal it from you in the end. Thus, the more adept you are at recognizing and knowing how to negotiate better to avoid a liar’s beating, the less likely you’ll incur that beating … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Liar #Avoid #Beating #Negotiator #Negotiations #bodylanguage #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Leadership Marketing Personal Development Sales

5 Sales Strategies Not Found in How-To Books

As a salesperson, you’re trained to ask customers what they want in terms of your product offerings. That’s wise advice but it’s incomplete. If you only ask customers what they want and then give it to them, you’re missing the biggest opportunity that has ever come in front of you – the chance to sell innovation.

Technology allows us to do things that were once thought impossible. While it is important for salespeople to ask customers what they want and then deliver on it, all that will do is keep you in the game – not ahead of it.

Chances are your competitors are asking customers the same questions, they’re getting the same answers, and they’re providing the same solutions.

So how do you break through to the next level of sales and become an anticipatory salesperson? Below are six strategies you won’t find in most how-to sales books.

1. Follow the Golden Rule of Sales

The Golden Rule of Sales is to give people the ability to do something they currently can’t do but would want to do if they knew it was possible. In other words, the Golden Rule is to help your customers be anticipatory. It’s called the Golden Rule because it’s much more profitable than simply giving clients what they ask for.

The key is that you have to look a little bit further into your customers’ predictable needs based on where they’re going. Only then you can see unmet needs and new opportunities.

2. Get Comfortable Around Technology  

One stumbling block in selling technology can be that the end user is awkward with new types of technology and related products. But another stumbling block could be that you, as the salesperson, are unfamiliar or uncomfortable with the tech-driven solution you could be selling.

This is where the value of a time travel audit, one of the core components of my Anticipatory Organization Model, can prove essential.

3. Practice Anticipatory Selling

Anticipatory selling offers enormous opportunity for those who recognize that the very nature of sales is shifting and, further, that there are strategies to leverage that change.

One key strategy of anticipatory selling boils down to something I call a pre-mortem. Unlike a postmortem, which is an examination after the fact, a pre-mortem is focused on anticipating objections, problems and issues before they occur – and, from there, pre-solving them before the sales process even begins.

4. Raise the Bar on Trust  

You need to shift from being a vendor to being a trusted advisor. A vendor simply supplies a product. A trusted advisor supplies true advantage.

When you seek that higher ground and become a trusted advisor, your clients trust you more.

Remember that the future is all about relationships. Relationships are all about trust, and you gain trust by earning it. So never teach people to distrust you by stretching the truth or hiding some pertinent information. To differentiate, you need to raise the bar on trust.

5. Commit to Finding the Customer’s Truest Needs

When you focus on redefining what you already have, you can take your current offering and leverage it to new levels. That’s when you become a sales leader. It’s not because of some fast-talking sales pitch, it’s because of your commitment to your customers and their true needs.

So focus on relationships, trust and truth, and you’ll be able to give your customers tools and solutions they never dreamed possible. As a result, both you and your company will attain new levels of success and realize the profit potential you always knew existed.  

Want more tips for anticipatory selling? Get my book The Anticipatory Organization: Turning Disruption and Change into Opportunity and Advantage, available now at www.TheAOBook.com

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Best Practices Human Resources Management Marketing Personal Development Sales

There Are Two Kinds of Training. Only One Works.

For as long as I’ve been working, I’ve experienced training. We all have. We also know that it doesn’t’ always “stick”. This is especially true of sales training. Let me share one big “why”.

As my role transitioned into sales leadership, and now consulting, I had to figure out why some training works better than others. When an initiative involves training, whoever owns the results of that initiative (sometimes different from who leads the training) must understand why…and what to do about it.

There Are Two Kinds of Training.

The two kinds of training are really related to two kinds of content:

  1. Content that trainees can “know”.By this, I mean that information in the training is simply transferred with little or no behavior change. Examples in the sales world are how to prepare a bid or enter an order, or how to find collaterals. General examples might be how to log into the company networks or get help, where to go for an access badge, etc. In banking, we had “how to spot and report possible money laundering” training. The point: learning is simple knowledge transfer. Training works fine for this kind of content.
  2. Content that addresses what trainees “do” (behavior content).A lot of sales training falls into this category. It introduces and defines specific selling behaviors…perhaps with some role-playing for practice. A training department might erroneously measure “success” via post-course content retention testing. By contrast, the vice president of sales owns results responsibility; for him or her, success means permanent behavior change. Millennial-friendly hip multimedia content, video role-playing or easily digestible micro-eLearning modules won’t change behavior. These innovations are great at achieving “know”: they effectively transfer knowledge and introduce desired behavior, but they don’t drive behavior change.

The second kind of training doesn’t work…without help. Behavior change training alone works for only a very small percentage of self-starting and highly capable sellers.

I have watched many companies fail to distinguish between the two kinds of content. As a result, they unconsciously cripple a “sales training” initiative by applying a “know” solution to a “do” problem. They fail to adequately reinforce behavior change after a “do content” training event.

Changing Behavior is Simple, But Not Easy.

The difference between “know” content and “do” content is the level and type of follow-up required. “Do” requires follow-up coaching. Until recently, coaching required a personalized coaching regimen delivered via old-fashioned human interaction. (more about new innovations in that area below). The graphic above shows a table of the difference between a training event and coaching for “do” content. Notice how coaching focuses on adopting or changing behaviors. The differences are pretty self-explanatory.

The gold standard of coaching behavior content is and has always been manager-delivered. Due to the one-on-one nature of effective coaching, a seller’s immediate manager is the logical person to deliver effective coaching.

I was one of the first in my company to become fully certified in the full suite of (Miller Heiman Group) coaching methodologies. I now help not only my own clients, but those of several colleagues to build coaching acumen in their management corps. It’s a hugely rewarding part of my consulting practice: I grow sales careers by growing sales managers’ careers.

Artificial Intelligence (AI) Comes to Coaching

The promise of AI is that it can act as an expert system that tirelessly monitors behaviors looking for gaps. An AI system has the time that a sales manager lacks. This is a powerful management tool. It also requires a huge underlying data set to “teach” the system to recognize both behaviors and behavior gaps.

I work with one of the first systems capable of recognizing critical selling behaviors. It diagnoses selling gaps proactively. It’s able to spot deal risks and recommend corrective selling behaviors in time to change the deal trajectory, a major innovation. This system operates from an expert system database built from the deepest experience base in existence: the largest, most successful B2B selling organization in the world. This knowledge base is poised to become the first to use machine learning (one form of AI) to diagnose sales opportunities via CRM data. This requires a different CRM that collects behavior data rather than today’s usual “activity-based” tracking. For instance, you can’t coach from “how many calls did this salesman make”. You can coach from data about meaningful conversations. CRM data isn’t today’s activity-based tracking; it’s metrics with insight into a buying decision…selling behaviors.

While personal coaching is still the gold standard, an expert-based system focusing on selling behaviors lightens the load on front-line sales managers. Sales managers are a very overloaded group, and can use the help.  A system which can automatically catch and notify sellers of the most common behavior gaps allows managers to concentrate their coaching on higher-value issues. Managers can follow up when sellers don’t react to machine-based suggestions, coach for more subtle points, etc.

Don’t Address a “Do” Problem With a “Know” Solution

If you and your company want to embark on a sales performance improvement journey, make sure your plan distinguishes between “know” and “do” content.  Then make sure that you do “do” correctly: with a robust coaching component. Also look for a solution which has a clear future into automated ongoing coaching using AI or some similar technology.

If you’d like a fresh set of eyes on your situation, I’d be happy to spend some time hearing your situation out, and your thoughts. Contact me at mark@boundyconsulting.com if you’d like to access a free sounding board. Comment below if you have any additional insights or questions to share.

To your success!

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Best Practices Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Women In Business

Are You Afraid of Losing to Progress?

“If you fear losing what you’ve gained, you’ve already lost it.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

When you think of progress, do you become afraid? Do you even consider what progress is and what it means to you? Progress will occur whether you’re afraid of it, don’t consider it, or choose to let it pass you by. It’s the one thing that’s constant in life. So, if you want to evolve in the ever-evolving environment that you’re in, you can do that by considering the following.

1. Define what progress means to you and why it has that meaning; you should realize that your definition will change over time. Recognize when those changes occur and what brought them about. Then, use markers to identify and measure how close you are to a goal. Make readjustments when they’re required. If you become apprehensive about making them or you do nothing to address them, consider whether you’re afraid of losing to progress. You may have a mental barrier that’s holding you back.

2. Ask yourself, when did you most aggressively seek progress? Why did you seek it? Other questions to ask are:

  • What changed in your life to cause you to seek progress?
  • How did you feel while you were going through what promoted the need for change, for progress?
  • What has change done for you?

3. What do you fear the most about progress? Is it change itself that causes angst? Other questions to ask are:

  • Are you fearful of leaving those you’ve known behind?
  • Are you concerned about where progress might lead you?
  • Will you regret not following the path of progress later in your life? If so, what does that thought do to you? How do you feel about it?
  • What has frustrated you the most about progress?

When you won’t move forward to embrace a goal, especially if it’s one that’s important to you, something’s holding you back. If you explore all realms of possibilities and you still can’t identify the silent hand that’s gripping you, you might be afraid of losing to progress. To test the theory, ask yourself the questions above. You’ll find answers to your dilemma in those questions. When all else fails let that be the last thought that you tackle. If fear is the culprit and you successfully combat it, you’ll slay that gobbling … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

Fear prevents some negotiators from being more aggressive. Because of that, they’ll lack the drive to obtain more in a negotiation. While you should exercise caution in a negotiation, caution based on fear can be self-demeaning.

If you fear progress, due to the gains you’ve acquired in a negotiation, assess the mindset that’s motivating you. There are times when leaving too much on the negotiation table is just as bad as attempting to gain too much. In either case, you can appear to be inept. When you display that type of demeanor it can be the setup that signals the other negotiator to be more aggressive with you. That could also be what signals him to push you harder by seeking more concessions. And, that’s a position you don’t want to be in.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Losing #Fear #Progress, Afraid #Success #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How to Win More Negotiations by Framing Better

 

“Framing is the impactor on one’s sensibility.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

When framing anything, the better the frame, the greater the chance for a successful outcome. Consider a wall, versus a fence, versus a barrier. You can use all of them to protect those that are inside. They can also be what keeps those on the other side from gaining entrance. And, you can state that they can protect those on either side. So, what’s the difference from a framing perspective? The difference lies in the perception of how you define the barrier. That’s why framing is so important.

When you frame content to be discussed in a negotiation, your framing of it determines how it will be perceived, how it will be discussed, and how the negotiation will flow.

The following are a few insights you can use to win more negotiations by framing them better. Doing so will increase your chances of having a winning negotiation outcome.

Value Proposition:

Before you attempt to frame a discussion, you should know what someone’s value proposition is. Because, if you make a concession that’s not perceived as being valuable, you might open yourself to a greater request (e.g. I don’t need that, but how about ‘x’). If you’d not intended ‘x’ to be discussed, you could have framed your offer by stating, I can concede on this, but not ‘x’. By doing that, you take ‘x’ off the table before it has the chance of entering the offer proposition. Mind you, the other negotiator can still request to have it, but you will have set a marker for denying him his wish. If you’ve used it as a red herring, you may turn the perception of its value to a greater benefit to your position. Then, if you wish to concede it, you should request something substantial in return.

Framing Mindset:

“He was right before, isn’t he right now?” Be careful of how you validate or accept a point as being valid. Just because an entity has been right 99 percent of the time, doesn’t mean that it’s right this time. Then again, if the other negotiator subscribes to such a thought, use it to your advantage.

You can do that by stating that you’ll be discussing ‘x’. Then, state that ‘x’ has been proven to have a 99 percent accuracy factor. Framing any point in that manner lends more credibility to it. There’s also a sense of security implied in the statement, because most people like the perceived sense of being surrounded by others.

Combating Opposing Framing:

If it doesn’t serve your purpose, be prepared to refute the framing attempts of the other negotiator. While doing that, have your own talking points ready to rebut his attempts to refute yours.

A good negotiator knows the hidden value that lies in framing a negotiation. Therefore, there will be an aspect of ‘give and take’ as you and he spar over the process you’ll use, and how you’ll frame those processes, to engage in the negotiation. During the planning stage of the negotiation, give serious thought to how you’ll frame your points and the strategies you’ll use to alter the other negotiator’s perspective.

Personas:

How are you going to act? The persona you project during the negotiation, confidence, or a lack of, and when you project that persona, will impact the negotiation. So, you should plan for how and in what circumstances you’ll promote a certain persona versus another. That’s also where framing comes in. If you synchronize the framing with your persona, you’ll have more perceived credibility.

Framing can serve as a silent ally that lies dormant while waiting to lend assistance in positioning the negotiation. When used stealthily, it can be what gives you a hidden advantage that the other negotiator never sees coming. Thus, using it wisely can enhance your chances of winning more negotiations … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Framing #Negotiations #bodylanguage #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Boundy’s Bookshelf: The Silo Effect. Are Your Sellers Siloed?

I just finished reading The Silo Effect.  The Peril of Expertise and the Promise of Breaking Down Barriers, a 2015 Book by Gillian Tett of The Financial Times.  I recommend it to anyone in a business leadership position.  For my own work with clients, I found Ms. Tett’s observations helped me clarify how important and valuable a company-wide focus on customer valuewill be to any company.

Most business people know that the word silo refers to “a system, process, department etc. which operates in isolation from others”.  Organizations establish specialty sub-organizations while pursuing efficiency, manageability, and other worthwhile goals.  The term silo tends to be used when dysfunctions arise: information hoarding, parochialism, competition for resources.

Silos sometimes contribute to more than mere aggravating dysfunction.  According to the book, regulators over-compartmentalized in the early 2000s, causing them to fail to connect all the contributors to the 2008 financial meltdown.

Siloed Sellers.

For me, a seller is anyone who touches the customer.  In many companies, this can include a wide variety of specialty roles:

  • New customer sales
  • Existing customer account management
  • Sales engineering, technical sales
  • Demonstration specialists
  • Inside sales
  • Bid/RFP services
  • Customer service
  • Technical Support
  • Implementation/customer success
  • Finance/accounts receivable/billing/credit
  • Key account managers
  • Channel management
  • Marketing
  • ..and more.

Forget all of the non-seller functions in your company: there are a lot of potential silos just among the roles that interact with customers.   And that’s a problem.

Your customers hate your silos

We’ve all had frustrating experiences when each new person we talk to needs us to explain a full backstory…often made more frustrating when they don’t believe what their last co-worker told us. All of these experiences tell us why we shouldn’t inflict negative experiences on our customers.

Worse, avoiding negative experiences is setting the bar far too low.  I advise that every seller (anyone who touches a customer) be equipped to talk to customers about their needs, problems, and aspirations.  Better, your people should be able to uncover and develop value with a customer.  Further, every seller role probably looks into your customer from a different angle; combining value insights into a single de-siloed view is something few great companies achieve.

De-siloing.

In The Silo Effect, Tett describes how data technology is coming of age to share information across silos.  She also maintains (as do I) that such technology is valueless if there is not strong leadership and a vision that busts down silos.  She shares stories of several organizations with strong leaders dedicated to silo-busting business models.  It’s an interesting read (made even more interesting when you imagine what one of those companies learned about its blind spots in 2016, the year after the book was published…unending vigilance and a little healthy paranoia is the lesson, I think).

I love working with clients to unite every seller role around customer-perceived value.  The key is finding the right leadership, and helping them operationalize the tools.  Companies who pursue a corporate “culture of continuous value improvement” use technology and training to translate a customer value focus into a cohesive corporate culture.  It’s probably not the only way to bust seller silos, but you seldom go wrong trying to deliver too much customer value.

If you’d like to discuss a more coordinated approach to your customers – say, the important ones you would hate to lose – reach me at mar@boundyconsulting.com.  You can also comment below.

To your success!

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

After That, Then What?

“Action without thought is like a squirrel driving a car. It’s nonsensical.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Why did you do that? Were you aware of what you were doing? Those may be the questions that others ask you when you’ve engaged in senseless behavior. Most of the time the answer to the questions are, I don’t know; I guess I wasn’t thinking. To avoid senseless behavior ask yourself, after that, then what.

Thinking ahead:

Before you engage in activities, do you think of the consequences that might occur as the result of those actions? Most people are aware that there’s a reaction for every action. Some people forget that truism. And, sometimes forgetting it leads to unexpected circumstances. Don’t let that happen to you. Before engaging in a deed, to be more aware of what might happen after it, during the decision-making process, ask yourself, after that, then what.

Understanding your mindset:

At different stages of the day, your decision-making process shifts. That’s because, as things happen throughout the day, the accumulation of the day’s activities causes you to alter your perspective. As an example, if someone has angered or vehemently challenged you about a point, you’ll be more likely to refudiate someone else that attempts to convey the same sentiment. Thus, you should always be aware of the mindset you possess when making decisions and what has occurred to influence your thoughts.

Timing:

When considering, after that, then what, be thoughtful about the timing of your decisions. Sometimes, you’ll have the power to bring your decision to fruition at that moment, other times you won’t. Thus, depending on the importance of the decision, it may behoove you to delay its implementation until a more favorable time.

Remember, decisions have two spectrums, haste makes waste and, he who waits too long loses opportunities. Thus, it may befit you to balance those spectrums on the pendulum of time.

If you want to avoid taking two steps forward and one step back in your life, before engaging in a decision, make sure you engage in, after that, then what thinking. Your decision will lead to an action. That action will lead in one direction versus another. If you don’t want to find yourself in a desolate place tomorrow, be more aware of the decisions you make today … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

Sometimes, offers and counteroffers flow quickly during a negotiation. Quick responses can lead to unwanted positions and disadvantage your standing. To sustain your negotiation efforts and enhance your chances of having a winning outcome, be mindful of where every concession and offer may lead. If you’re astute, you can use the, ‘answering a question with a question’ tactic to gain information (e.g. what do you mean? what do you think I mean?). That’s also a tactic you can employ to slow the other negotiator’s attacks when he’s bombarding you with questions. To insulate yourself even more from his bombarding, ask yourself, after that, then what.

Suffice it to say, when you’re in the heat of a negotiation, the way to ensure that you don’t act too hastily is to always ask, after that, then what. Doing that will lessen the chances of you wandering into a negotiation minefield. It will also allow you to maintain greater control of the other negotiator, yourself, and the negotiation.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Mind #Success #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #liars #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

Negotiator – Five Crazy Ways to Prevent Being Burned by a Bully

“To beat a bully, defeat his sources of power.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Dealing with a bully can be daunting, exhausting, and frustrating. It can leave you in a state of anxiety and devoured by stress. But that doesn’t have to be the case. Observe the following 5 crazy ways to prevent being burned by a bully when negotiating.

Three bully types:

  • Hard Core:

This bully type is someone who likely had psychological challenges as a child. He wants the respect and acknowledgment that he’s someone to reckon with.

  • Middle Core:

This individual is someone whose bullying is based on circumstances. While all bullies seek to maximize their efforts based on situational opportunities, this bully type will seek to escalate his situations if giving the chance to do so to become a hard core bully.

  • Soft Core:

A soft core bully is one that’s classified as a bully in training. He’s usually someone that’s enticed into doing things to prove himself to those from whom he seeks approval. He’s what’s known as a useful idiot in intelligence parlance.

It’s to your advantage to know the bully type that you’re dealing with.

Do a good deed:

Most bullies wear their emotions on their sleeves. They want others to like and appreciate them. Studies have indicated, when people are in a positive frame of mind, they’re more receptive to your thoughts and ideas.

If you commit a good deed for a bully before the negotiation, that could endear you to him, which may lead to him having a more positive perspective of you. If so, he may be lax when it comes to emploring bullying tactics against you during the negotiation. As in all cases when dealing with a bully, you should be mindful of how he might react as the result of you doing good deeds for him. Some bullies will interpret such actions as a green light to push you harder.

Group threat:

A group threat can be an assembly of others you amass to threaten the bully or his supporters. In either case, the group you assemble should be perceived as a formidable force that the bully or his followers will have to contend with if he attempts to bully you. It should also be a force that the bully perceives as being threatening to his standing and wellbeing.

Playing field:

Don’t play on the bully’s field. That means, when negotiating with a bully, do so on your own terms. Don’t allow him to dictate where and when the negotiation will occur. If he says, ‘x’, you say, ‘y’. Bullies like tough guys. Show him that’s who you are by the actions you engage in.

Scorched earth:

There will be times when you must stand up to a bully to show him how tough you are. Sometimes, you’ll have to take that to the extreme.

A scorched earth approach to negotiation is one way to display that extreme. It entails positioning yourself as someone that will ‘burn down everything’ if you don’t get your way. After positioning yourself as such, make him fight for every concession you grant him. You want him to feel like he’s really been in a battle during the negotiation. In times of perceived peace, make him wish he’d prepared for war.

Some of the above strategies will work with some bullies and some won’t. By knowing the type of bully you’re dealing with, you’ll have a better idea of how you can prevent him from burning you. Thus, by implementing the strategies above, you’ll enhance your negotiation position. You’ll also be better prepared to thwart the efforts of a bully … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

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Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

Who’s Blocking Your Sun?

“When your sun is being blocked, move.” – Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Life is going along nicely for you and then something happens. The sun that has been brightening and serving as a source of warmth in your life is suddenly gone. It’s then that you wonder, who’s blocking your sun.

The blocking of your sun is a metaphor for anything or anyone that disturbs the calm, the flow of success, or state of near bliss that you’re experiencing. Disruption occurs in everyone’s life. It’s what you do during such times that will determine what occurs next in your life.

So, what do you do when someone disrupts your life, block your sun? At what point do you begin to create strategies to alleviate the growing concern about needing to change the direction of your life?

Here are a few signs that might alert you to a coming eclipse, the blocking of your sun.

  • Your life appears to be perfect, or at least as perfect as it has been for some time. You begin to think, “I know what comes next. Things are too good. Bad times must be ahead.”
  • “I can’t believe I just got that promotion, that raise, that client! These are fantastic times. I’d better enjoy this while it last. Before long, I’ll be back in the hunt for the joy I’m experiencing.”
  • How about this one – “I can’t believe things aren’t getting better. How much longer can I stand this?”

In every situation above, your thoughts led to the perception that things were going to change. Even when you question how long a bad situation was going to last, your thoughts were exploring the possibility of calamitous times ahead.

Here’s the point. Your thoughts lead to your actions. Thus, what you focus on becomes the driving force that determines the direction you’ll take in your life. So, if you focus on negative occurrences, you shouldn’t be surprised when negative things occur in your life. After all, you’re the one that summoned them.

When you’re unsure of an outcome, focus on the positive aspect. Since you don’t know what that outcome might be, focusing on the possibility of it being positive will relieve the degree of stress that might occur from focusing on the negative aspect of it. Sure, you should consider the possibility of a negative outcome. Prepare for it but don’t dwell on it. Once you’ve prepared a plan, move on. Let your mind rest in peace knowing that you’re ready for what might come your way.

Someone or something will always attempt to block your sun. But you don’t have to support the effort. Keep a strong mind with a strong mental disposition and even when the clouds start to gather, you’ll have the mental fortitude to turn those gray skies to blue. You’ll prevent your sun from being blocked … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations? 

Unanticipated challenges occur in every negotiation. When that happens, don’t fret. Even if you’ve prepared for the unexpected and the unexpected occurs, don’t fret. Worst-case scenario, call a time out; get away from the negotiation table. There’s a lesson to learn. That lesson will be of benefit in the future. By adopting that mindset, you should be able to allay your emotional state of mind. That should lead you back to a more rational thought process. In so doing, it will lead you to a path of clearer thinking.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

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Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

Negotiator Win: Know How to Turn Weakness to Power

“Weakness, like power, is perceptional. Knowing when to display one can expose the other.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Have you ever employed the initial appearance of weakness as a tactic in a negotiation? It can be a great way to gather valuable information. When the other negotiator sees you in a weakened position, that’s the time when you can turn your perceived weakness into a source of power. Observe the following to do so.

The Opening – Setting the Stage:

To set yourself up to be perceived as weak, consider the following strategies.

  • At the opening of the negotiation, offer a weak handshake; this positioning is enhanced by allowing your hand to be on the bottom of the handshake (i.e. the other negotiator’s hand on top of yours). That will subliminally signal subjugation on your part.
  • Project a sense of slowness to grasp points. Don’t overplay your hand. Remember, you’re playing the role of someone that’s not sure of himself.
  • Allow yourself to be maneuvered by making concessions quickly when doing so is not detrimental to your position.
  • Refer to having to consult a higher authority when pushed too hard for a concession; that’ll convey a sense of powerlessness.
  • While engaging in the processes above, seek to uncover the other negotiator’s source(s) of power. You can use that as leverage against him later in the negotiation.

Mid Game – The Turn:

This is the point at which your demeanor transformation begins.

  • Know the strength of your resources compared to your opponent. That will be your source of power. You can use it as leverage during the negotiation to thwart his efforts.
  • During the negotiation, be prepared to refer to a higher authority that trumpets the other negotiator (e.g. him – we reached a multimillion-dollar deal with company x last year, you – we know that and they’re talking with us this year; I guess they didn’t like the results of your deal.)
  • Create a false sense of value with red herrings as chits that you can trade later for items and concessions of importance.

End Game – The Closing:

This is the time you employ tactics that display, you’re no longer a weakling.

  • Begin to use the red herrings you set up in the prior phase to enhance your negotiation position. Be stubbornly diligent when making concessions at this point. Your efforts should send a subliminal message that indicates, you’re going to be a tough negotiator from this point on.
  • Once you’ve engaged in the strategies above, be cautious. You will have transformed yourself from the weakling you initially appeared to be into a titan. The other negotiator will realize that he’s dealing with someone that’s more astute than he originally thought. That will cause him to raise his guard. He’ll also be seeking ways to adjust his negotiation strategies to match his new reality.

The timeframe and phases mentioned above still have to be accompanied with the negotiation strategies that are appropriate for the type of negotiation you’re in. Thus, the outline above should serve as a foundation to which you can add more specifics steps to fit your situation. By using this outline, you’ll be well on your way to creating a roadmap that leads to more successful negotiation outcomes … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

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