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Category: Personal Development

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Accounting Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Skills Women In Business

What You Need to Know About Negotiation Fallacy Dilemmas

“Fallacy dilemmas are only dilemmas to the degree that you allow them life. Test them and you’ll determine to what degree they live.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

When negotiating, you should always be aware of fallacy dilemmas. In a negotiation, fallacy dilemmas are offers presented as either/or propositions, whose propositions are opposite one another. They’re presented in such a manner that they seem to be the only available options.

In discussing fallacy dilemmas with some negotiators, they’ve stated that identifying and using fallacies in a negotiation can be confusing. This article will give you insights into how you can engage successfully with them.

Here’s the challenge with fallacy dilemmas, when negotiating such propositions can be positioned to direct your thought process towards either of the options presented. In reality, there may be a number of other possible solutions that get excluded from your thought process simply because you’re being directed to consider only the proposition offered. Thus, other possible solutions are never considered. That’s why you should be mindful of when fallacies are presented.

Nevertheless, while being mindful of fallacy dilemmas being used against you, they can be an extremely useful tool to have. If you employ this tactic/strategy at the right time, you can enhance your negotiation efforts.

How to guard against fallacy dilemmas in your negotiations. 

Most know the premise, if you’ll lie you’ll cheat, and if you’ll cheat you’ll steal! If you accept that premise as a truism, you’re susceptible to the fallacy.

While it may be true that liars who cheat may also steal, or engage in any combination of nefarious activities, it doesn’t mean that every cheater steals, etc. That’s the dilemma of the fallacy.

Therefore, to guard against fallacy dilemmas during a negotiation, don’t accept any proposition as having only two alternatives.

Note: If you’re in the thick of a negotiation and you sense you’re being forced into thinking that there’s only to options, pause. Take time to reflect. Observe what the other negotiator does. If he attempts to push you into making one of the decisions offered, consider slowing the negotiation down by being more deliberate about your options.

How to use fallacy dilemmas in your negotiations.

You know how to guard against this dilemma, flip it to employ its usage against the other negotiator. To be most effective, consider presenting it in two ways.

  1. Quantitative – Use this type of offer when you want to limit the other negotiator’s perspective to a specified range (e.g. would you rather have zero or a thousand); this offer excludes the fact that through payment terms or other arrangements, he might be able to garner more than a thousand.
  2. Qualitative – Implement this method when attempting to alter the emotional mood of the other negotiator (e.g. would you rather walk away with nothing or something).

Body Language – Add value through intonation emphasis.

With body language, in this case nonverbal communication, the words you place greater or lesser emphasis on dictates the importance that those words convey. Such dictation will also convey a sense of importance when presenting your fallacies. As such, consider ahead of time what words you’ll use to convey a sense of needed urgency when making your offers and how that will be of benefit in your fallacy presentation.

Now that you have a greater awareness of fallacy dilemmas (did you catch what I just did about your awareness (i.e. if something is true, it can’t be false)), use them in your negotiations. Know that things get out of control to the degree that you don’t control them. Thus, when presented with an offer consider all of the options associated with the possible solution of that offer … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#NegotiationDilemma #FallacyDilemma #EitherOrDilemma

#NegotiatingWithABully #Bullying #Bully #negotiations #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology

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Accounting Best Practices Growth Health and Wellness Human Resources Management Taxes

Travel and Entertainment Business Expense Deduction Summary

The 2017 Tax Cuts and Jobs Act made some major modifications to the travel, entertainment, taxable fringe benefits and moving expense deductibility for taxpayers. Above is a summary that shows the difference in the current deductibility (or inclusion in income for employees) for certain of these deductions.

At GROCO, we assist high net worth clients and their families with wealth creation, family transfers, taxes and charitable giving. Please give me a call at 510-797-8661 if you need assistance or have questions on these new rules or would like to know how to make, keep and/or transfer your wealth.

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Accounting Best Practices Entrepreneurship Health and Wellness Human Resources Industries Investing Management Marketing Skills Women In Business

What’s Your Company’s Moral Compass?

Imagine that you’re in the running for a coveted spot in a well-regarded organization for a high-level position. It’s taken you years to get to this place and you really want this job. You wait and wait through the agonizingly long interview process and in the end, you don’t make the grade.

These are the kinds of situations that “try men’s (and women’s) souls.” How you go through the stages of making the decision to apply, to how you tolerate the waiting, to how you manage the disappointment of being overlooked are great indicators of how you handle stress (and life) in general.

This is just one example of how reaching beyond your comfort zone initiates a series of mental challenges. In his book, Flow: The Psychology of Optima; Experience, Michaly Csikszentmihalyi (Harper Collins, New York, NY, 1990)l, spent years researching the question of what makes one happy. Ultimately, according to his findings, the answer to this very illusive inquiry was: “The control of one’s consciousness determines the quality of one’s life.”

In other words, how we internalize and make peace with the myriad of disappointments and loses as well as deal with our successes and celebrations determine our level of satisfaction we experience in our lifespan.

Given that introspection and transformation are such critical factors in every person’s – and ultimately in every company’s well-being, I’m always amazed at how little attention is paid to the recognition of how important this kind of mental training is.

And I specifically use the word “training,” because the mindset needed to weather the ups and downs of life are not natural. Our brains are wired for danger and spew forth an endless sea of worst-case scenarios. These peak performance skills need to be taught We learn them, either through the school of “hard knocks” – which can take a lifetime – or through parents, teachers, coaches and mentors.

What then, is the role of the company?  Business is business, and the bottom line is the barometer of success or failure.

Yet, the world is changing. The balance of power is shifting, and employees are demanding a more human approach to their work experience – which is in greater synergy to the more spiritual yearnings of mankind. They are asking their companies to honor higher moral values, such as a sense of purpose, respect for family life, racial and gender equality, awareness of individual differences and authenticity, to name a few. In other words, they are asking their organization to be “conscious.”

To be “conscious” means to be transparent, to allow oneself to be vulnerable, to accept responsibility for one’s own behavior and to be on the path of continuous personal and transformational growth. Where is your company on this moral compass?

Here are three ways you can begin to tackle this worthy challenge:

1. Make Your Own Personal Growth a Priority

Wherever you are in the hierarchy of leadership, ask yourself, “Where am I on my own path of personal growth?” Have I invested my efforts to be the best person I can be? Do I have a trusted advisor that helps me see my own blind spots? Every highly successful person I know has someone in their corner who helps them navigate those precarious situations that keep them up at night.

2. Listen to your employees.

Goal setting is a common measure of performance in companies. But when people don’t reach their goals, do you really know why they don’t? There are ways of increasing the level of meaningful communication between managers and employees that go way beyond the traditional semi-annual or annual reviews. Beaconforce, a startup here in San Francisco is one of those innovative companies that have a great solution to this problem.

3. Train Your Employees for the Olympics

As I mentioned above, a resilient mindset is critical for sustainable growth. It may sound like Utopia, but imagine you had an entire organization of individuals who had the mental fortitude to handle the daily pressures of work and life outside of work. Did you know that $1 billion is lost in productivity in the US alone due to stress-related absences? These stress management and peak performance skills, as I said, can be learned. Be that company who understands, appreciates, and puts into action, the concept that all change in your organization and the world, begins with each and every individual having a healthy and resilient mental mindset.

If you’d like to dive deeper to learn more about your own level of Peak Performance skills, go to http://masteryunderpressure.net or join our Facebook community at Mastery Under Pressure Community.

Or contact me directly for a 30-minute complimentary consult at tina@tinagreenbaum.com

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Best Practices Growth News and Politics Personal Development

We The People

On February 14th 2017, a massacre occurred at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida. A former student, armed with an AR-15 rifle walked through the halls on a shooting spree. Seventeen students and teachers were killed and fourteen others were injured. The assailant, 19-year-old Nikolas Cruz, purchased the rifle himself. This particular rifle, the AR-15, has been involved in several mass shootings. You might recognize some of these recent occurrences: Aurora, Colorado; Santa Monica and San Bernardino, California; Orlando, Florida and now Parkland.

The children have gone back to school, but understandably, with some trepidation. They have anxiety just being at school, dread fire drills, along with remembering the scene no child should have to see especially in a place that should be safe. Think back to when you attended school. Did anything like this even cross your mind? It’s unthinkable. Yet, since 2013 there has been an average of one school incident a week in the United States confirms USA Today.

Depending on how you define school shootings, there have already been 18 this year. How are our lawmakers handling this fact? They are arguing over how to define “school shootings,” states The Atlantic.

Luckily, the students of Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School are speaking out. Recently the children met with President Donald Trump and with lawmakers in the Senate and the House. Their message was one of the horrors they experienced and the strength of demanding something be done.  They are confronting our leaders and holding them accountable for change.

Watching these kids from Florida describe what they went through and how they don’t feel safe in school is heartbreaking. Yet these events happen weekly. Where is the government in all this. Why haven’t things changed? We know there have been discussions in both houses and bills brought forth. These bills have experienced trouble getting passed. One reason is the tacking on of other issues that democrats or republicans want to be passed. They hope they can slide their issue in while the gun violence topic needs to be addressed now.

Another reason nothing gets accomplished is re-elections. This is an election year, so senators and congressmen don’t want to do anything to upset their chance of being appointed. Their focus in on themselves and how to keep or win the seat they want. Basically, they are working for themselves, not working for us.

Senators and congressmen are busy not only with their elections, but with keeping the powerful happy. The NRA is a powerful lobby that no one wants to upset and that gun group is against any changes to the existing laws. Who are the lawmakers working for? Not us.

Let’s take a look at what’s really going on. The recent State of the Union gives us our answer. One of the pictures taken of the house floor this year shows half the house standing in agreement and the other half seated. This not a President Trump thing. When you look at pictures of President Obama’s State of the Union you see the exact same thing except the sides of the room has switched. Our lawmakers are fighting with each other. How can anything get accomplished when the democrats and the republicans don’t work together? Our system is broken and We the People need to stand up.

The job falls to us. We are to hold our senators, congressmen, judges, city and state officials accountable. We are charged with this task by The Declaration of Independence. It states, “That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends [unalienable Rights], it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government…”

When our leaders fall away we are to speak out. Not in the shameful way the media does about our President. Instead, we require our leaders to succumb to the design our country was founded on. This is found in The Declaration of Independence and The Constitution. We the People send the message to our lawmakers; adhere to the rules or you will be removed.

Our government is fractured and needs to be rectified. That means getting rid of those senators and congressmen who are not working for us. There are many leaders in office who have lost the reality of what the people want. They represent their own interests. We must cut them loose.

Our message is clear. No longer do we accept the shut-down of our houses. We don’t tolerate stall tactics; we demand action. We demand that you work while you are in the office we put you in. No longer will we pay the price of your lack of work or your own agendas.

This is an election year and it’s time to clean house. Put term limits in place. You serve two terms and then you are done. For those currently in office, when your second term is up you can’t run again, period. This can be pushed through the Senate and the House of Representatives if we push our leaders to get it done.

Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School was named after a woman who was an environmental activist and journalist. She encouraged people to be a “nuisance” and “never give up” even when politics stand in the way. The students are doing just that. It’s our time to join them while they have the ears of our leaders. We must correct our country now.

 

“You have to stand up for some things in this world.”

-Marjory Stoneman Douglas

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Best Practices Growth Management Personal Development

The Gorilla in the Room

At a recent conference I attended, the keynote speaker talked about a study that I realized had surprising implications for effective leadership.

In this study, people watched a video of kids passing basketballs. Half the kids were wearing white shirts, and half wore black shirts. The instructions were to count how many times the kids in the white shirts passed the ball. Halfway through watching, a kid the same height as everyone else, dressed in a gorilla costume comes walking onto the court from the right-hand side of the screen stops in the middle of the kids, looks directly at the camera, pounds his chest, and walks off the far-left side of the screen. When asked after how many people saw the gorilla, only 50% responded yes. That is because the other 50% were so focused on the instructions to count the kids in white shirts passing the ball that they completely missed this gorilla in the room.

Why is this important, and what does this have to do with leadership?

It’s important because it highlights how much we can miss when we have selective attention, which is defined as the process of focusing on a particular object in the environment for a certain period of time while simultaneously ignoring irrelevant information. Our attention is a limited resource so it makes sense that using selective attention allows us to tune out unimportant details and focus on what really matters.

The everyday purpose for selective attention is that by focusing on too many new ideas and opportunities people become overwhelmed and can’t make a choice about how to move forward, analysis paralysis sets in, so selective attention is imperative.

But what happens when that selective attention turns into tunnel vision? We often think that what we are focused on is the most important thing, the only answer. But what If you and your team are so focused on what you think the answer is that you miss out on new ideas and opportunities?

I propose that selective attention should be done deliberately and with intention in order to ensure that it does not turn into tunnel vision. This means that instead of being so focused on your solution that you only see the ideas, people, and research that support that decision; what if you spent some time each week with your team or a partner deliberately focused on new ideas, open to the possibility that your idea is not the best solution?

The goal for this time is for your team on a weekly basis to get together and discuss their specific focus and the tasks they are currently using selective attention to complete. Each member of the team can then ask questions to see if tunnel vision has taken over, if new ideas are needed, or if new opportunities have been missed.

This should be a healthy conversation that allows debate, conversation, and challenges to keep everyone thinking in new ways. If nothing new comes from it, they can go back to their selective focus on that task or project for another week. However, is something new sparks from this, they should be allowed to explore what that might mean for the project and the team.

This is especially important if you are responsible for a team or project. Of course, you want your team to focus on their tasks in order to reach the desired outcome for the project. Selective focus is necessary in order to get work done without distraction, but it can also lead to missed ideas and new innovation when done in isolation.

The intent of being deliberate in selective attention and making time to ponder new ideas and opportunities is to help avoid tunnel vision and realize that the details you tune out might actually matter.

If you have examples on how selective attention has affected your team for better or worse, email sharon@c-suiteresults.com to share your experiences.

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Growth Leadership Personal Development

Executive Leadership Pearls of Wisdom on Conflict Management

An irritant can be the catalyst for the creation of something beautiful and valuable.

One of the most delectable foods you can eat in our beloved bayous is an oyster po-boy. Talk about delish! My mouth is watering just thinking about it! But watch out! Don’t be surprised if you crunch down on a pearl. (No need to worry about pearls if you’re slurping down raw oysters on the half shell without chewing. Your teeth will be spared. But ca c’est bon!)

Pearls are formed when a piece of grit, sand or shell get trapped inside the oyster. It protects itself from irritation by secreting a liquid around the particle, which eventually, over time, builds into what we know as a pearl.

Many managers tell me that they spend a large part of their workday resolving conflicts and settling disputes among team members. When we think of “conflict,” we automatically think that it is always a bad thing. This is not necessarily true. Like the irritant to the oyster, something valuable can come from conflict.  Actually, conflict can be a very positive thing when it challenges leaders to explore new ideas, sparks curiosity about differences, or stretches the group’s problem-solving efforts.

A little dash of hot sauce, or a bit of conflict among team members is inevitable. Managing conflict within a work group can be quite a challenge, and your team needs a leader who can channel it for the greater good of the team.

Leaders and managers, you are probably constantly faced with playing “referee” between two or more of your employees. (This is a complaint I hear often!) Although I’m certainly not a relationships expert or a counselor, I have had quite a bit of experience in this department (unfortunately).

Try to practice a few of my “pearls” of wisdom to help you help your employees resolve conflicts with as little bloodshed as possible.

Executive Leadership Pearls of Wisdom to Manage Conflict:

  • Foster an open-minded work culture so that employees will realize that their way is just one way of looking at things. Instead of asking themselves “How can I win?” they should ask themselves, “What can I learn?”

 

  • Teach team members to get their emotions under control and to gather their thoughts before they say something that they’ll regret. Explain that the only decisions that can’t wait are those involving the safety or health of others. All other decisions can wait until facts are gathered and emotions are checked.

 

  • Encourage employees that if they must criticize, to criticize ideas not people. Teammates should focus on the issues instead of blaming or insulting others, which would only result in the negative, destructive type of conflict.

 

  • Train yourself and employees to use active listening skills. For example, try restating what the other person is saying before responding. Listen to the whole message rather than just what you want or expect to hear.

 

  • Urge the team to ask questions rather than assume. You know the saying, when we assume…. Well, you can only guess what another person is thinking or what their motivations are.

It’s easy to talk about these pearls of wisdom, and hard to actually perform them regularly. Kind of like talking about the need to exercise, when we really just want to kick back and have a strawberry daiquiri. It is important as a leader that you use these team-building techniques so that your team members can learn to work out disagreements on their own.

CHIME IN:

How do you deal with conflict in your workplace?

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Skills

What’s in Your Blind Spot?

Part of what makes my job fun is that no two clients are trying to solve the same problem. But whether it’s about leading with confidence and authority, managing conflict, or public speaking, they do all share one fundamental challenge: a perception gap, or “blind spot.”

You see when it comes to skills of persuasion and influence, the way you come across to others can make or break your chances of getting to “yes.” The problem is that most people know how they want to come across to others, and they know how they think they come across, but they are also remarkably unaware of how they actually come across. That gap in their perception is their blind spot.

The irony is that they are present in the moment when they interact with others: they hear their own speech and would generally believe they have control over their body and facial expressions, but the way the scene appears to play out in their minds is often very different from other people’s experience. At one time or another, we all suffer from this perception gap.  So why does this happen, and how can you close the gap?

Let’s look at those three components again.

First, how do you want to come across? This connotes an intentionality, and requires some forethought prior to the conversation or presentation. Part of the problem is that most people plan for and attend meetings on auto-pilot, and fail to put any planning effort into this question. If you want people to recognize your confidence, or if you want them to see you as approachable even in times of crisis, it is critical to start with that goal in mind, and consciously monitor your participation to keep your message on track.

Second, how do you think you come across? As the meeting progresses, and/or after it’s over, take stock of how you feel at the time. For example, if midway through the meeting you can feel yourself getting agitated and defensive, remind yourself not to let your emotions get the best of you. Take a deep breath, and watch your tone of voice, body language, etc. At the end, try to reflect on what you said and how you felt at the time, and acknowledge when your speech style did or did not feel like it reflected the way you wanted to appear. Make a point to note any discrepancies to work on them for next time.

Finally, how do you actually come across? Once you’ve attempted to assess your own behavior, seek objective feedback from others. Ask them for overall impressions you made, and if they felt that you did or did not demonstrate the qualities you wanted to project. Regardless of the answer, follow up with asking why. If they say you seemed calm, nervous, moody, distracted, confident or otherwise, ask them to point out any specific behaviors that led to that impression. Maybe you didn’t realize that you kept crossing and uncrossing your arms which appeared standoffish, or only seemed to speak with people at the front of the room and ignored those in the back. Or maybe you spoke with far less intonation variation than you thought, so while you wanted to sound engaged and engaging, people actually found you to be disengaged and appear a bit indifferent. Just remember to assure them that you will openly and graciously accept their feedback, no matter what they share, and that it won’t come back to haunt them if it’s not what you had hoped to hear.

Want to test yourself? Try recording yourself in a one-minute video as you imagine yourself speaking to your upcoming audience, whoever they may be. Go through these steps, planning how you want to come across, practicing mindfulness as you speak, and then watching the video to see where there is a gap between your planning and execution. Once you’ve identified your own blind spots, then you can take meaningful steps to close the perception gap and ensure that your message lands as intended, and you are able to influence the conversation as desired to get the desired outcome.

********

Are you aware of your own blind spots, but don’t know how to fix them? Or are you unsure of where they might be but recognize that you need to identify and fix them? If so, contact me at laura@vocalimpactproductions.com or click here to schedule a 20-minute focus call to discuss it with me personally!

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Growth Human Resources Management Personal Development

Why Don’t Performance Reviews Work at Home?

On St. Valentine’s Day this year there was a funny little piece on the opinion page.  A wife giving a performance review for her husband.  He was labeled a “potential optimal husband”.  He was not quite there yet.  She explained the development opportunities for him, acknowledged his accomplishments as a husband for the past 20 years, and made recommendations for development. (Brody, 2018)

It was funny because it was tongue in cheek.  More importantly, it was funny because it is highly unlikely we would ever attempt to have a performance discussion at home with our spouse or partner.  In my experience, I can’t think of any situation where I would be willing to receive that kind of feedback. I can’t imagine my partner would either.  Am I wrong? If typical performance reviews are popular at work why don’t we use them at home?  It’s because they damage trust and trust is the most essential element for a relationship.

They Damage Trust

The quality of a relationship is directly dependent upon the level of trust. Furthermore, the results of an organization are directly dependent upon the level of trust. Exceptional leaders recognize this and behave accordingly.  They recognize their own behavior must demonstrate trust first before they can expect trust in return.  An exceptional leader will ask great questions in a caring way, and they won’t criticize or micro-manage. Ernest Hemingway once said, “The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.”

When you judge someone, you immediately increase the probability of a negative emotional reaction.  We all have our own opinions about behaviors and events.  We are all biased with our views. But, isn’t it better to either withhold your bias and ask respectfully and positively for what you want?  Or, another option is to honestly acknowledge your bias and then ask respectfully and positively for what you want.  Our opinions may not be facts.  The bible reminds us we should look for the boulder in our own eye before we point out the pebble in another’s.  Aren’t we are better off asking someone questions and offering loving solutions than we are criticizing?

At home, we always need innovative ideas to make the home life better.  The same is true at our work.  Rarely will we improve creativity by criticizing others because it discourages risk taking.  A typical performance review discussion will very often increase fear and anger and shut down innovation.  This applies to a family and a work team.

Skylar Capo, 11, of Fredericksburg, Va., saw a little bird on the ground in her dad’s backyard. (News, 2011)  She then noticed the family’s cat eyeing it, too.  Skylar scooped up the woodpecker and looked for the bird’s mother. Her search turned up empty.  She asked her own mom, Alison, to help her decide what to do.   Her mom suggested they take care of the bird until it was strong enough to survive on its own.  Being an avid nature lover and animal rescuer, Skylar was thrilled.  She had saved the bird from an untimely death at the paws of the cat and she was going to learn how to care for it.

The Capos put the bird in their car to drive to a Lowes Home Improvement Store to search for materials they may need to care for the bird.  Bringing the bird inside in a cage so it wouldn’t suffer in the summer heat while they shopped they began their search when a shopper stopped them.  The shopper claimed to work for the U.S. Fish and Wildlife.   She explained they were in violation of protected species act.  Two weeks later the Capo’s were fined $535 because the law prohibits the capture or transport of any protected species.  A State Trooper, even though she was told the whole story, threatened Skylar’s mom to 1 year in jail if she ever did it again.  Thankfully two weeks later the ticket and the threat were cancelled, and apology was given.

The typical appraisal process is frequently used to enforce policy and procedure.  Policies are designed to control behaviors and they virtually always have positive intentions.  However, as with little Skylar, policies often don’t fit every situation and therefore can cause unintended consequences (the cat killing a baby bird). Because it is used as an enforcement tool, the typical performance review discussion often stops creative action.  What will little Skylar do next time she sees a baby bird in danger?

Any attempt to control behaviors of your partner at home will clearly end in disaster.  Any attempt to make policy without full transparency and agreement from all at the home will also likely end in emotional upset.  The typical appraisal holds many employees back from taking risks and this prevents the organization from achieving incremental change.  The typical appraisal won’t work at home and the home has even higher trust than the work place.  If it damages trust and creativity at home, what makes us think it can work in the workplace?

Check out the interview on C-Suite Best Seller TV to learn more about how to stop leadership malpractice and replace the typical performance review: https://www.c-suitetv.com/video/best-seller-tv-wally-hauck-stop-the-leadership-malpractice/

Wally Hauck, PhD has a cure for the “deadly disease” known as the typical performance appraisal.  Wally holds a doctorate in organizational leadership from Warren National University, a Master of Business Administration in finance from Iona College, and a bachelor’s degree in philosophy from the University of Pennsylvania.   Wally is a Certified Speaking Professional or CSP.  Wally has a passion for helping leaders let go of the old and embrace new thinking to improve leadership skills, employee engagement, and performance.

 

Brody, B. (2018, February 14). My Valentine’s Day performance review. USA Today, p. 7A.

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Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Women In Business

What’s Behind the Curtain?

“In life, sometimes it appears that we’re controlled by invisible forces. Understand those forces and you’ll have greater control of your life.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

What’s behind the curtain of your life? Are you aware of what motivates your actions and why you interact with others in the manner you do? I ask because, the more we know what moves us, the more we’ll know about where and when to move. That insight becomes our source of motivation and our sense of inspiration; it will become the driving force that drives us to become more of a force than we are.

As you engage in your daily activities, take note of why you do some of the things you do; note especially those activities that are misaligned with what you should be doing. If something is pulling you off-track, you should be mentally aware of why it’s doing so. Not until you’re mentally aware of it, can it be altered. You should also know, we are driven by our subliminal thoughts; they override our conscious thoughts. That means, when you’re unsure as to why you engage in something, it’s your subconscious mind that’s driving you.

Going forward, acknowledge and be grateful for what you have, and really appreciate it. Reflect on what you value and how it came to be; the spillover benefit will come in the form of the endorphins that’ll occur. They’ll make you feel happier about life, improve your psyche, and motivate you to achieve more in your life.  That, in turn, will lead to even greater happiness and success … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

Sometimes, we don’t appreciate what we’ve achieved in a negotiation. Nor do we appreciate the skills that we’ve accumulated that has allowed us to obtain the gains we’ve made. If you understand what’s behind your thought process (i.e. it’s makeup), you’ll be in greater touch with the feelings you have. That, in turn, should allow you to focus on what you’ve achieved in the negotiation and what’s important about those achievements. If you don’t want to lose them, protect them. That may mean exiting the negotiation at that time.

You may have a myriad of negotiation tactics and strategies that you employ at the precise moment that such is required. Remember where that knowledge came from. Recalling the sources of your thoughts will allow you to return to those sources for the purpose of refreshment and enhancement. That’s why it’s important to understand what’s behind the curtain of your life, of your mind. Those sources are direct links to what you’ve become, and from which your negotiation skills have grown.

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

What are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #Psychology #Perception #rejection #leadership #HowToImproveyourself

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Health and Wellness Human Resources Management Marketing Skills Women In Business

Are We Being Negative?

Negativity. It is emotionally draining. We are bombarded with negative messages all day long. I was on LinkedIn, Instagram and Facebook over the weekend and I had to log out after only a few minutes on each platform.

There were so many quotes that start with “don’t”. So many opinions about things that quite frankly, are immaterial, or opinions about things that really did not happen.

We have become so accustomed to just putting it out there, everywhere. Sometimes we need to ask ourselves, “are we being negative?”

  • Instead of being sarcastic be kind.
  • Instead of being rude be respectful.
  • Instead of lying be honest or silent.
  • Instead of self-righteous be understanding.
  • Instead of judgmental be forgiving.
  • Instead of fearful be hopeful.

Emotions are contagious. How we think and feel affects those around us. Be positive. The power of positive thinking is amazing!

Think of best-case scenarios and work towards those goals.  Greet people with a smile and say “hello!” Let someone else have that parking spot. Take a deep breath and practice patience. Share a laugh. Say, “sorry”. Ask for help. Do your best.

Have a wonderful day!

Michelle Nasser, Executive Coach, Motivational Speaker, Author

Teaching you how to make the best decisions for your organization.