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Negotiator – Five Crazy Ways to Prevent Being Burned by a Bully

“To beat a bully, defeat his sources of power.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Dealing with a bully can be daunting, exhausting, and frustrating. It can leave you in a state of anxiety and devoured by stress. But that doesn’t have to be the case. Observe the following 5 crazy ways to prevent being burned by a bully when negotiating.

Three bully types:

  • Hard Core:

This bully type is someone who likely had psychological challenges as a child. He wants the respect and acknowledgment that he’s someone to reckon with.

  • Middle Core:

This individual is someone whose bullying is based on circumstances. While all bullies seek to maximize their efforts based on situational opportunities, this bully type will seek to escalate his situations if giving the chance to do so to become a hard core bully.

  • Soft Core:

A soft core bully is one that’s classified as a bully in training. He’s usually someone that’s enticed into doing things to prove himself to those from whom he seeks approval. He’s what’s known as a useful idiot in intelligence parlance.

It’s to your advantage to know the bully type that you’re dealing with.

Do a good deed:

Most bullies wear their emotions on their sleeves. They want others to like and appreciate them. Studies have indicated, when people are in a positive frame of mind, they’re more receptive to your thoughts and ideas.

If you commit a good deed for a bully before the negotiation, that could endear you to him, which may lead to him having a more positive perspective of you. If so, he may be lax when it comes to emploring bullying tactics against you during the negotiation. As in all cases when dealing with a bully, you should be mindful of how he might react as the result of you doing good deeds for him. Some bullies will interpret such actions as a green light to push you harder.

Group threat:

A group threat can be an assembly of others you amass to threaten the bully or his supporters. In either case, the group you assemble should be perceived as a formidable force that the bully or his followers will have to contend with if he attempts to bully you. It should also be a force that the bully perceives as being threatening to his standing and wellbeing.

Playing field:

Don’t play on the bully’s field. That means, when negotiating with a bully, do so on your own terms. Don’t allow him to dictate where and when the negotiation will occur. If he says, ‘x’, you say, ‘y’. Bullies like tough guys. Show him that’s who you are by the actions you engage in.

Scorched earth:

There will be times when you must stand up to a bully to show him how tough you are. Sometimes, you’ll have to take that to the extreme.

A scorched earth approach to negotiation is one way to display that extreme. It entails positioning yourself as someone that will ‘burn down everything’ if you don’t get your way. After positioning yourself as such, make him fight for every concession you grant him. You want him to feel like he’s really been in a battle during the negotiation. In times of perceived peace, make him wish he’d prepared for war.

Some of the above strategies will work with some bullies and some won’t. By knowing the type of bully you’re dealing with, you’ll have a better idea of how you can prevent him from burning you. Thus, by implementing the strategies above, you’ll enhance your negotiation position. You’ll also be better prepared to thwart the efforts of a bully … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Ways #Weakness #value #Hide #bodylanguage #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

Negotiator Win: Know How to Turn Weakness to Power

“Weakness, like power, is perceptional. Knowing when to display one can expose the other.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Have you ever employed the initial appearance of weakness as a tactic in a negotiation? It can be a great way to gather valuable information. When the other negotiator sees you in a weakened position, that’s the time when you can turn your perceived weakness into a source of power. Observe the following to do so.

The Opening – Setting the Stage:

To set yourself up to be perceived as weak, consider the following strategies.

  • At the opening of the negotiation, offer a weak handshake; this positioning is enhanced by allowing your hand to be on the bottom of the handshake (i.e. the other negotiator’s hand on top of yours). That will subliminally signal subjugation on your part.
  • Project a sense of slowness to grasp points. Don’t overplay your hand. Remember, you’re playing the role of someone that’s not sure of himself.
  • Allow yourself to be maneuvered by making concessions quickly when doing so is not detrimental to your position.
  • Refer to having to consult a higher authority when pushed too hard for a concession; that’ll convey a sense of powerlessness.
  • While engaging in the processes above, seek to uncover the other negotiator’s source(s) of power. You can use that as leverage against him later in the negotiation.

Mid Game – The Turn:

This is the point at which your demeanor transformation begins.

  • Know the strength of your resources compared to your opponent. That will be your source of power. You can use it as leverage during the negotiation to thwart his efforts.
  • During the negotiation, be prepared to refer to a higher authority that trumpets the other negotiator (e.g. him – we reached a multimillion-dollar deal with company x last year, you – we know that and they’re talking with us this year; I guess they didn’t like the results of your deal.)
  • Create a false sense of value with red herrings as chits that you can trade later for items and concessions of importance.

End Game – The Closing:

This is the time you employ tactics that display, you’re no longer a weakling.

  • Begin to use the red herrings you set up in the prior phase to enhance your negotiation position. Be stubbornly diligent when making concessions at this point. Your efforts should send a subliminal message that indicates, you’re going to be a tough negotiator from this point on.
  • Once you’ve engaged in the strategies above, be cautious. You will have transformed yourself from the weakling you initially appeared to be into a titan. The other negotiator will realize that he’s dealing with someone that’s more astute than he originally thought. That will cause him to raise his guard. He’ll also be seeking ways to adjust his negotiation strategies to match his new reality.

The timeframe and phases mentioned above still have to be accompanied with the negotiation strategies that are appropriate for the type of negotiation you’re in. Thus, the outline above should serve as a foundation to which you can add more specifics steps to fit your situation. By using this outline, you’ll be well on your way to creating a roadmap that leads to more successful negotiation outcomes … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Power #Weakness #value #Hide #bodylanguage #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How to Unlock Your Imagination and Win More Negotiations

“To enhance your imagination, don’t shackle it.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

To win more negotiations, you must know how to unlock your imagination. It’s your imagination that will determine how well you do in the negotiation.

As a child, your imagination was limitless and boundless. You could obtain and achieve anything that your imagination could conceive. No matter what it was, all you had to do was imagine it and it became your reality.

You can capture that same sensation when negotiating by using the following insights to heighten your imagination. The heightening of those senses will lead to more winning negotiations.

Know how you think:

When addressing your reasoning skills, do you note if it’s sequential or random; a person with high sequential reasoning skills is better equipped to create a systematic series of actions directed to a specific outcome. You should be aware of the thought process you engage in to maximize your efforts. Doing so will allow you to see the gaps in your imagination, which in turn can lead to heightening your thought process.

Know your senses:

Are you more visual, kinesthetic, or auditory? The answer is dependent on the environment and circumstances. So, how does the environment impact your thoughts? And, in what situations are you guided by one sense versus another? Again, to engage your imagination more effectively, you need to be aware of what and how to ignite it. Having that information will be the key that brings your imagination to life.

Before you can explore the depths of your imagination, you must know how to reach it. Knowing the answers to the questions above will be the conductor that directs you on the path to that opening.

To enhance your imagination process:

Don’t be restrictive with your thoughts. That means, be willing to consider the inconceivable.

Mix elements of your thoughts that may appear not to be related. Even when thinking disparate thoughts, there may be connecting threads that lead to deeper contemplation. Your imagination will reside in that place.

Converse with selected people in your circle that can help you delve deeper in thought.

Heighten your emotional sense of awareness. The more you’re aware of your emotions, the greater the opportunity to control them. Controlling them allows you to alter your perspective, which can lead to an enhanced imagination.

Meditate – Sometimes, your mind becomes so encircled by negative thoughts that you can’t think succinctly. During such times, if you’re at the negotiation table, call a timeout, remove yourself from the table and meditate. Meditation will slow your thought process and allow you to relieve the stress that comes from negative thoughts. Once you feel a sense of serenity, consider sublimating the sublime where your thought process is concerned.

Watch the meaning you assign to an outcome. If you suspect that it will be negative, your thoughts will flow in that direction. Your mind will enter a different thought process than if you’d considered the outcome to be positive. When you’re not sure of an outcome, consider the possibility of it turning out negatively or positively. Prepare for the worse, but don’t dwell on it. Think about the way you think.

When you sense you’re in a negotiation position that generates angst, use the strategies above to unlock your imagination. By unleashing that inner power, you’ll begin to think in a manner that’s more progressive towards winning the negotiation … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Imagination #value #Hide #bodylanguage #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Negotiators: Beware of the Hidden Danger in Free Value

“There’s always a hidden fee in free. Don’t accept free without knowing what that hidden cost might be.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

As a negotiator, what do you consider when you hear free? Do you think about the hidden danger that may lurk in something that’s free? Sure, there could be value in the offer, but you should also beware of the hidden danger in anything that’s free.

When you hear the word free, your brain goes into a sense of euphoria. The endorphins begin to flow at the thought of receiving something for nothing. In such a mindset, you can become susceptible to lowering your guard. Doing that can leave you vulnerable to unsuspecting ploys. That can occur even when you’ve planned how you’ll address such offers. When you find yourself in such quandaries, consider the following.

What’s the offer attempting to achieve:

People are motivated by their aspirations. Thus, during a negotiation when offers are extended, a goal is at the purpose of that offer. If you’re aware of that intent, you’ll be in a better position to assess its potential value. Offers are not equal. Don’t let one that appears to be free become too costly for you to accept. Examine it thoroughly.

What’s to be gained:

Sometimes, acquiring a concession in a negotiation can add value to your overall goals. If the concession appears not to contain a cost, its allure may become bewitching. Be cautious when such appears to be the case. Good negotiators accumulate chits that they can use at other points in the negotiation. Thus, while you’re receiving what appears to be free, what you’re really receiving could be an IOU.

The timing of the offer:

The timing of an offer can obscure hidden dangers. If the intent is to obtain a greater concession, a negotiator may seek smaller ones to build towards the larger one. Thus, in some cases, positioning may be the goal. That means, offering something for free may be the setup or cover up for something to come.

Always be aware of where a concession or request may lead. Since negotiations are the accumulations of gains and concessions, you don’t want to make a concession thinking that it will lead to more gains. Or, acquire gains that are too costly, compared to the concessions you make to acquire them.

What do you have to concede:

In every negotiation, good negotiators have red herrings to use as chits or diversions. They can serve as bartering pieces that don’t contain a burdensome cost to you, or as distracters from the real intent of your offer. In a best-case scenario, a red herring should be perceived as something of value that you possess that can be dangled as a sought-after desire that the other negotiator wants. The more he’d like to possess it, the greater its perceived value will be. Thus, if it doesn’t cost you anything to relinquish, you can heighten its appeal by feigning great concern to part with it. The point is, don’t weaken red herrings by relinquishing them too easily. Doing so will weaken your negotiation position.

There’s a cost associated with everything we acquire, even if it’s just the time that we invest. Because time itself has a cost. If you keep in mind that nothing’s free, you’ll maintain a more prepared mind to assess the hidden cost and hidden dangers that may be concealed in free offers. Doing so will make you a better negotiator … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Danger #value #free #Hide #bodylanguage #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Body Language Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How to Observe Body Language to Uncover the Truth

“To uncover the truth, expose its darkness.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

When you negotiate, what body language gestures do you observe to uncover the truth? Do you seek insights from gestures, intonations, and other signs to validate when you suspect the truth is being violated? If so, exactly what do you look for?

You can gain great insight about someone’s truthfulness via their body language, and negotiate better, by arming yourself with the following information.

Body Language

Before you can accurately interpret someone’s body language, you must establish their baseline. That baseline will allow you to more accurately assess and compare the body language gestures the other negotiator exhibits more accurately during the negotiation. To form his baseline, observe his mannerisms when he’s in a non-threatening environment.

Our body seeks to maintain a constant state of comfort. When it’s out of that state, it will commit actions to put itself back into that state (e.g. babies cry for attention when they’ve soiled themselves, adults feeling overly aggrieved strike out in anger to get even and soothe themselves, etc.). During the body’s state of discomfort, observe signs like, rubbing of the hands, touching one’s face/neck/arm/leg, etc., to validate the state of mind that person is in; those signs are called comfort gestures. The person emitting the behavior is attempting to comfort himself; that person’s body is attempting to put itself back into a state of comfort.

When you see the gestures noted above, assess what has caused that person to experience discomfort. Was it something he said? If so, he may have entered a state of untruthfulness. If you sense that might be the case, consider questioning him about your suspicion. Or, you can progress the conversation and note when other comfort gestures are exhibited. The second, third, etc., iteration of such signals will add to the possibility that he’s violating the truth.

Intonation

When a person speaks, note their intonations. It will lend insight into what they believe to be more important than other aspects of what they’re saying. As an example, if someone said, “I’m not sure if that’s the whole truth.” The word(s) they placed the most emphasis on would denote what’s important to them. Thus, if the emphasis was on “whole”, there may be more that’s undisclosed. Once again, if you think that’s the case, probe to get to the root of the possible deception.

When it comes to intonations, observe what causes someone to alter their speaking pattern. Remember, the body seeks a constant state of comfort. Thus, if someone alters their speaking pace, they’re doing so due to the stimuli that put them into that mood. The behavior may be due to their contemplating what to say to complete their thought. If you sense they’re concealing the truth, consider how and when you’ll challenge them.

Once you become astute at reading body language gestures, you’ll uncover secret cues that indicate when someone’s not being forthright. You’ll become a human lie detector … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Truth #uncover #bodylanguage #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How to Win More Negotiations by Using Power Right

“The perception of power is based on how it’s used. Use it right, and you’re perceived as being powerful. Use it wrong and you’re perceived as being weak.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

What does power look like in negotiations? Is it encompassed in the outcome (i.e. he who obtains the most is more powerful)? Is it encapsulated within the flow of the negotiation, or does it stem from another source? You can win more negotiations by using power right, but first, you must know how and when to deploy your power. Thus, your assessment of how to present the presence of power should be based on the negotiator type that you’re negotiating with.

Lead or Led

Power in a negotiation may take the form of the person that’s leading or the person that’s led. In the former situation, a false pretense can be assumed because he assumes he’s in the lead. That can lend itself to a false sense of bravado, which might cause one to expose his hand.

On the other hand, some people prefer to be led in a negotiation. Of the four personality types of negotiators (i.e. Hard/Closed, Hard/Open, Easy/Closed, Easy/Open) the ‘Easy/Open’ negotiator type is the one most susceptible to being led.

Hard/Closed

The most combative of the negotiator types will be the ‘hard/closed’ negotiator. His mental perspective is, ‘the only way I can win is if you lose.’ Thus, he’ll fight you for every gain you acquire and be very reluctant to make concessions unless he receives something in return. Just as an aside, some negotiators will adopt this posture to assess your response. That means this style of negotiation is not his preferred manner to negotiate. You can gain insight into the validity of his attempts by adopting the same demeanor, making a small concession and seeing how he responds or challenging him per his demeanor. In either case, don’t engage too deeply until you’ve gained enough of an assessment to know definitively what he’s up to.

Hard/Open

This negotiator type will not be as rigid as the ‘hard/closed’ type, but she may be close. She won’t be as gruff. Her demeanor will be one of allowing you the hope of acquiring more of what you seek if you go along with her plans.

With this type, go slow. Allow her to lead you to gain insight into her plans. Again, make small concessions when appropriate and request concessions to determine how amenable she might be to a give and take process. Don’t attempt to be heavy-handed with her. If you do, she may stiffen and become the ‘hard/closed’ type.

Easy/Closed

The ‘easy’ type of negotiators are the most amenable types to negotiate with. While the ‘easy/closed’ type will be the most difficult between the two, she will still be more open than the ‘closed’ types.

With this type of negotiator, adopt a power position; this is to let her know that you recognize the power you possess in the negotiation. Don’t pose it as an outright threat. Instead, position it as the silent stick that can be employed if the carrot doesn’t work.

Easy/Open

This is the easiest type to negotiate with. He will be amenable to following your lead. Be sure not to spook him. If he feels safe in the negotiation, he’ll follow your lead without question; he’ll even do so to his detriment. But he wants things to appear fair, so be aware of this trait in him. The best power to employ is the appearance of no power. Let him think he’s in the lead and you can lead him from behind.

When using power in a negotiation, the way you employ it based on the negotiator type will impact the success you have with it. By knowing when and how to employ your power, you’ll be in a more powerful position throughout the negotiation … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#win #Power #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How to Use One Secret Trick of Good Negotiators

“To obtain more, ask for more. And, know when to ask.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

There’s one secret trick that good negotiators use that allows them to obtain more from every negotiation they’re in. Do you know what it is?

Good negotiators ask for more than they expect to receive. But wait, there’s more! It’s not just that they ask for more, it’s the way they ask, and the timing that allows them to get more.

Characteristics of Questioner:

The way you make a request should be in part, based on the character of the person you’re asking. Some people are brisk (i.e. get to the point), others are more sociable (i.e. let’s take our time). Thus, it would not behoove you to pose the same type of request to the people possessing the characteristics mentioned. If you did, your request might be met by one and not the other, or neither of them, due to the way you posed the question. In either case, you’d be gambling on the outcome. Posing the right question in the manner that’s more receptive to the characteristics of the person to whom you’re asking a question enhances that outcome.

Verbiage Use:

“Can you …”, “Will you …”, “I need …”, “I want …” are forms of openings to a question that will psychologically appeal to different personality types. To maximize the probability of obtaining what you seek, mimic the verbiage used by the person you’re seeking the outcome from. If you observe that she predominantly uses, “can you help me” when requesting assistance, use that phrase on her. It will have an echoing effect on her; that means, the words will sound like something she’s heard before. That’ll be true to her because they will be the words that she uses. That will place her in a mindset to grant your request more readily.

Setup and Timing:

The one main advantage you have over the other person is the fact that you know you’re going to make a request. The timing of when you do will impact the probability of a successful outcome. To enhance that outcome, consider probing by asking questions that aren’t as direct as the one you plan to use (e.g. What do you think about …?). Be careful not to give too much insight about your real intent. If you do, you might be weakening your efforts.

Another tactic you can utilize is to make a request that’s significantly more than what you’re seeking. Then, by comparison, the smaller request won’t appear to be as large.

Situational and Positional Power:

Along with timing, consider when you have situational or positional power. You have situational power when you’re in a situation where you’re perceived by others as being powerful (i.e. police officer with red lights flashing). Positional power stems from the position you hold at the time when you’re perceived as being in control (i.e. boss over subordinate).

During such times, you’ll be able to make requests with an enhanced probability of having them granted.

Asking for more in any negotiation will always enhance the probability that you’ll obtain more. But you must know how to properly execute your requests to enhance that probability. Using the insights above will do just that for you … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Trick #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

‘Body Language Hands’ – How to Immediately Win More Negotiations

“People use their hands to add meaning to their words. To capture more of their meaning, listen to their hands.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Do you observe the body language of someone’s hands when you’re negotiating? To win more negotiations, you should listen to their hands! Hands convey a lot of hidden information in a negotiation.

There’s so much information conveyed by the way someone uses their hands. People use them to show appreciation by clapping. They display their hands to exhibit displeasure in other ways (i.e. sitting on their hands).  They also use their hands when speaking? Hands give insight into the thought process that someone has. As someone is speaking, their hands add or detract from the message they’re delivering; you do the same when you’re conveying information, too.

When there’s a difference between someone’s words and their body language, pay more attention to their body language. It will disclose someone’s intent more than their words. Consider the following lightly when conversing with someone. Consider it more strongly when you’re negotiating.

Hands close to the body:

The closer someone has their hands to their body, the more guarded are their thoughts. You’ll see this display when someone senses perceived threats to their well-being. Their hands are in that position to protect themselves from perceived indifference.

If you see this in a negotiation, it may behoove you to put the other negotiator at ease. Based on what caused him to display his guarded gesture, you may have to address that point before you can induce the comfort you seek to invoke in him.

Hands with interlocking fingers :

When you observe a negotiator in this position, he could be displaying a demeanor that states that he’s not open to your offer, suggestion, or counteroffer. To confirm your observance, consider questioning him about the meaning of his display (e.g. I noticed you have your hands closed and your fingers locked. That usually means that someone (use ‘someone’ to avoid ‘you’ – the latter may make him defensive) is not open to something that has occurred. Is anything wrong?). Then, note his response. If he unlaces his fingers and opens his hands, while saying everything is okay, ask him to proceed. Two things will have happened. One, you will have altered his body language, which will entice him to become more mentally receptive to you and your offers. Two, you will have given him the lead in the negotiation. Based on what he does with it, he’ll give insight about what caused the initial display that you brought into question. And, he’ll give vision to what he’d like to discuss. That will highlight what’s important to him.

Hands pushed away palms out:

Take special note of this gesture because it indicates that the originator wants no part of what caused him to display the gesture. You can note future discernment by the degree that he forces this gesture outward. Also, be aware of this gesture when the other negotiator voices his assertion that he’s in agreement with you. In this case, his body language belies his true feelings. Believe that more than his words.

There are other hand gestures that give insight into a negotiator’s thought process. We’ll leave those to discuss at another time. For now, note the signals mentioned above. In so doing, you’ll be more perceptive. That will assist you in winning more negotiations … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Women In Business

Negotiators: Negotiate Better – Know How to Use Words Right

“Good negotiators listen for what’s not said, in order to hear words right.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

People’s thoughts give life to the words they use to influence others. Thus, their words move people to actions. As a negotiator, to negotiate better, know how to use words right.

Using His Words:

When engaged in a negotiation, listen to the words used by the other negotiator and the way he uses those words. As an example, he makes the statement, “I only want to address one thing at a time.” Later in the negotiation, if he asks you to address multiple items/situations simultaneously, you can state, “I only want to address one thing at a time.” Citing his own words as justification for your actions will psychologically put him into a state of reflection. Note his body language to discern the effect that your words have on him (e.g. leans back resting towards one side of his body, laying a pen/pencil down/aside, looking up into the air). Any such signals will serve as validation that he’s taking your words into his thought process.

Emphasized and Changing Words:

During a negotiation, the opposing negotiator will emphasize certain words. Listen for them. Through his action, he’s denoting the importance that word has in his thought process. You can use that insight to reposition your negotiation efforts to fit the altering situation based on the way he’s thinking.

As an example, if he begins a statement by saying, “Weeee, I think I can do it.” Note the word choice change from ‘we’ to ‘I’. Plus, note how he drew ‘weeee’ out. While making that change, he was likely considering to what degree he’d have to rely on others. By changing his words, he displayed his belief that he has greater control over producing the outcome in question. That display gives you insight into where he believes his abilities lie in that situation. You can clone it by posing similar questions to move him in the direction of your needs throughout the negotiation. That insight will also allow you to cite his pride of authority and position him as such. Then, if you reach a point of decision and he refers to his need to consult others, remind him of what he’s implied about his authority. Even if he states the situation at hand is above his authority, you will have uncovered his limits.

Unspoken Words:

People say a lot through the words they don’t use. Thus, what’s not said can be more important than what’s said. It too gives insight into their thoughts.

During a negotiation, closely observe the word choice used by the other negotiator to convey his thoughts and offers. Consider what he’s not saying and why he may not be using specific words. If you sense he’s attempting to prevent you from uncovering something, ask him about it. Use the words that you believe he’s not saying and observe his reaction. If his reaction is one of dismissiveness, pay attention. You may have stumbled upon a point that requires greater probing.

When people hesitate, pause, or alter their words, they’re giving you insight into their shifting mindset. That shift represents a change in their thinking. If you’re astute, you’ll observe the cause of that action and use it to advantage the negotiation.

From the way you use words to convey your offers, to the way you use the opposing negotiator’s words to shape his perspective, if you use words right in a negotiation you’ll experience greater negotiation outcomes … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Women In Business

Negotiator Safety Perspective is a Strong Matter of Perception

“Look to the perspective of safety for greater insight into the perception of its meaning.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

As a negotiator, what’s your perspective of safety when negotiating? It’s a question you should consider because your perspective influences your thoughts and actions. If you’re not aware of that, you could find yourself engaged in irrational thinking and behavior, which would not support your negotiation efforts. Consider the following thoughts in your future negotiations.

Sensations:

Do you feel it? When negotiating, can you feel the change as it’s occurring? As you’re negotiating, attune yourself to your sensations. In some cases, you’ll sense subliminal signals; they may not fully register at your level of consciousness. If you’re aware of such sensations, you’ll be alert to signs that signal the need to alter your strategy. Note when you have a sense of foreboding. That may be your first warning signal that something may be amiss in the negotiation.

Assess Emotional Wellbeing:

Do you note your EQ (Emotional Quotient) when negotiating? Your EQ is your ability to read and adjust to signals in your environment based on the person that emits those signals. Thus, the better you are at deciphering signals and adjusting to them appropriately, the better you’ll be as a negotiator. Therefore, always maintain control of your EQ.

Environmental Impact:  

What credence do you give to your negotiation environment? The environment shapes your perspective. If not controlled, it’ll shape you!

Consider this, you’re a salesperson at a Mercedes dealership. A Woman drives up in a Chevrolet. She comes in and begins looking at vehicles on the showroom; she’s looking at the high-end Mercedes, not those in the lower price range. What are your thoughts about her and how you might service her needs? What approach would you take to do so? Would your approach be the same if she arrived in a Mercedes? Do you consider the clothes and jewelry she’s wearing? You’ll probably consider those questions and many others before approaching her. Note what was omitted – her need to feel safe in dealing with you, the vehicle she might purchase related to how safe it is, how you’ll deal with her later. Unless you take that into consideration, you may be losing the opportunity to uncover her real desire to purchase the vehicle. Those omissions will also impact the negotiation.

In every negotiation, safety is a silent variable that tags along for the ride. If the exchange between you and the other negotiator becomes tense, the need for safety is usually the harbinger that signals foreboding. It’s also the creator of anxiety, which can lead to stress.

Conclusion:

As you negotiate, be aware of safety’s role. Do so from the perspective of everyone that’s involved in the negotiation. There will be times when you and the other negotiator are worried. You’ll miss that anxiousness as to why that worry exist if you lack focus.

Suffice it to say, to be more successful in your negotiations, first focus on the fears you and the other negotiator have about the outcome. In making those assessments, consider how you and she can use the perception of safety to enhance your perspective. By engaging in this process, you’ll eliminate potential pitfalls that might befall the negotiation, while developing a clearer path to where victory lies for both of you … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

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