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How to Observe Body Language to Uncover the Truth

“To uncover the truth, expose its darkness.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

When you negotiate, what body language gestures do you observe to uncover the truth? Do you seek insights from gestures, intonations, and other signs to validate when you suspect the truth is being violated? If so, exactly what do you look for?

You can gain great insight about someone’s truthfulness via their body language, and negotiate better, by arming yourself with the following information.

Body Language

Before you can accurately interpret someone’s body language, you must establish their baseline. That baseline will allow you to more accurately assess and compare the body language gestures the other negotiator exhibits more accurately during the negotiation. To form his baseline, observe his mannerisms when he’s in a non-threatening environment.

Our body seeks to maintain a constant state of comfort. When it’s out of that state, it will commit actions to put itself back into that state (e.g. babies cry for attention when they’ve soiled themselves, adults feeling overly aggrieved strike out in anger to get even and soothe themselves, etc.). During the body’s state of discomfort, observe signs like, rubbing of the hands, touching one’s face/neck/arm/leg, etc., to validate the state of mind that person is in; those signs are called comfort gestures. The person emitting the behavior is attempting to comfort himself; that person’s body is attempting to put itself back into a state of comfort.

When you see the gestures noted above, assess what has caused that person to experience discomfort. Was it something he said? If so, he may have entered a state of untruthfulness. If you sense that might be the case, consider questioning him about your suspicion. Or, you can progress the conversation and note when other comfort gestures are exhibited. The second, third, etc., iteration of such signals will add to the possibility that he’s violating the truth.

Intonation

When a person speaks, note their intonations. It will lend insight into what they believe to be more important than other aspects of what they’re saying. As an example, if someone said, “I’m not sure if that’s the whole truth.” The word(s) they placed the most emphasis on would denote what’s important to them. Thus, if the emphasis was on “whole”, there may be more that’s undisclosed. Once again, if you think that’s the case, probe to get to the root of the possible deception.

When it comes to intonations, observe what causes someone to alter their speaking pattern. Remember, the body seeks a constant state of comfort. Thus, if someone alters their speaking pace, they’re doing so due to the stimuli that put them into that mood. The behavior may be due to their contemplating what to say to complete their thought. If you sense they’re concealing the truth, consider how and when you’ll challenge them.

Once you become astute at reading body language gestures, you’ll uncover secret cues that indicate when someone’s not being forthright. You’ll become a human lie detector … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

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Entrepreneurship Management Marketing Negotiations Operations Sales Skills Women In Business

Thank You for Your Patience

“Patience can be a virtue; it can also be an enslaver. Know the difference to avoid entrapment.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

How many times have you heard the words, “thank you for your patience”? To a degree, there are times when such words become frustrating. You hear over the intercom, “you’re flight’s been delayed”, thank you for your patience. The train is 33 minutes behind schedule. Thank you for your patience.

In most situations when such words are uttered, thank you for your patience, you’re in a captive position. You can’t do anything but wait. So, why do you think such announcements are made? Do you think there’s a hidden message implied?

Sometimes, the attempt is to keep you calm and feeling like the offending party is sorry for the dilemma they’ve caused. They’re soliciting empathy to soften you to the plight you find yourself in. In other times, they’re genuinely sorry.

So, what can you do to pushback on such psychological ploys? In some cases, you can say, I appreciate the sincerity of your statement, can you please do ‘x’? In this case, ‘x’ is something that you might want due to the inconvenience you find yourself in. That request is nothing more than a test to assess their sincerity.

Depending on the circumstances, you might be surprised at what you’re granted. The point is, words are used to influence emotions. In this case, they could be used to assuage the hostile feelings that may be swirling in you due to the circumstances. To allay those feelings and test your negotiation skills, ask the other party to show through action how sorry they are. You can request anything that pleases you. I’ve done it by asking for a penny. The request got a laugh, which made the situation more tenable. It changed the outlook I had and that of the other party.

When you find yourself in a position of helplessness, due to situations that you perceive to be out of your hands, take actions to control them. You’ll be amazed at how well you feel … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations? 

In a negotiation, the words, ‘thank you for your patience’ can be a way to subdue a request for concessions, or slow the negotiation process down. It can also suggest genuine sincerity for an indiscreet remark or action. The point is, you need to understand the real meaning of someone’s conveyance to assess the purveyor’s true intent. Without validation, you could misperceive that intent, which can cause the negotiation to take an unexpected turn.

First, consider the mindset you possess; your current state of mind will influence your perspective. Next, consider the person with whom you’re negotiating. Has she displayed an ill temper throughout the negotiation, or a demeanor that’s been non-threatening, passive, and one of conciliation?  Take into account what has occurred prior to that point; the closer you are to a point of exasperation, the less likely you are to being in an understanding mindset. That means if you’ve been riled throughout the negotiation, or at a point that’s not too distant, you’ll be more likely to seek retribution and less likely to offer forgiveness.

Always be mindful of the intent of the other negotiator. It’s through that understanding that you’ll gain insight into the real person with whom you’re negotiating.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How to Win More Negotiations by Using Power Right

“The perception of power is based on how it’s used. Use it right, and you’re perceived as being powerful. Use it wrong and you’re perceived as being weak.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

What does power look like in negotiations? Is it encompassed in the outcome (i.e. he who obtains the most is more powerful)? Is it encapsulated within the flow of the negotiation, or does it stem from another source? You can win more negotiations by using power right, but first, you must know how and when to deploy your power. Thus, your assessment of how to present the presence of power should be based on the negotiator type that you’re negotiating with.

Lead or Led

Power in a negotiation may take the form of the person that’s leading or the person that’s led. In the former situation, a false pretense can be assumed because he assumes he’s in the lead. That can lend itself to a false sense of bravado, which might cause one to expose his hand.

On the other hand, some people prefer to be led in a negotiation. Of the four personality types of negotiators (i.e. Hard/Closed, Hard/Open, Easy/Closed, Easy/Open) the ‘Easy/Open’ negotiator type is the one most susceptible to being led.

Hard/Closed

The most combative of the negotiator types will be the ‘hard/closed’ negotiator. His mental perspective is, ‘the only way I can win is if you lose.’ Thus, he’ll fight you for every gain you acquire and be very reluctant to make concessions unless he receives something in return. Just as an aside, some negotiators will adopt this posture to assess your response. That means this style of negotiation is not his preferred manner to negotiate. You can gain insight into the validity of his attempts by adopting the same demeanor, making a small concession and seeing how he responds or challenging him per his demeanor. In either case, don’t engage too deeply until you’ve gained enough of an assessment to know definitively what he’s up to.

Hard/Open

This negotiator type will not be as rigid as the ‘hard/closed’ type, but she may be close. She won’t be as gruff. Her demeanor will be one of allowing you the hope of acquiring more of what you seek if you go along with her plans.

With this type, go slow. Allow her to lead you to gain insight into her plans. Again, make small concessions when appropriate and request concessions to determine how amenable she might be to a give and take process. Don’t attempt to be heavy-handed with her. If you do, she may stiffen and become the ‘hard/closed’ type.

Easy/Closed

The ‘easy’ type of negotiators are the most amenable types to negotiate with. While the ‘easy/closed’ type will be the most difficult between the two, she will still be more open than the ‘closed’ types.

With this type of negotiator, adopt a power position; this is to let her know that you recognize the power you possess in the negotiation. Don’t pose it as an outright threat. Instead, position it as the silent stick that can be employed if the carrot doesn’t work.

Easy/Open

This is the easiest type to negotiate with. He will be amenable to following your lead. Be sure not to spook him. If he feels safe in the negotiation, he’ll follow your lead without question; he’ll even do so to his detriment. But he wants things to appear fair, so be aware of this trait in him. The best power to employ is the appearance of no power. Let him think he’s in the lead and you can lead him from behind.

When using power in a negotiation, the way you employ it based on the negotiator type will impact the success you have with it. By knowing when and how to employ your power, you’ll be in a more powerful position throughout the negotiation … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#win #Power #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

Do You Suffer from the Illusion of Success?

“Success has many suitors. Are you prepared to be embraced by success?” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Exactly what is a success? You hear people talking about success but seldom do they speak about what it means to be successful. Some people may see what they consider to be a bum laying on a grate and deem him as lacking success. Is that true? Might that individual be so happy with where he is in life that he would consider himself to be successful?

The meaning of success can only be determined by you! And, it’s very important that you define what that means. Its meaning will shift throughout your life but unless you define it at every stage of its change, you’ll miss the opportunity to define its meaning for your future.

When you define what success means to you, you’re defining your future. You’re setting psychological neurons into motion within your own brain to acquire the goals that will determine the degree of success you’ve achieved at some point in the future. That will determine the actions you engage in, the friends you associate with, the job or business activities you indulge in, etc. When you define what success means for you, you set a road map of how you’ll reach the weigh stations along the path to success.

So, don’t create the illusion of success by a lack of its definition. Instead, determine what it’s related to as it relates to the person you wish to be in the future. The better you define what success is to you, the greater the chance you’ll have at creating a plan to become successful. There will be illusions along success’ path but they won’t create the distraction that they would have produced had you not defined its meaning. Plus, you’ll be in a better mental place to banish any illusions that would present themselves as a ghostly harbinger to distract you from your path. That will reduce the angst and stress that you would have placed upon yourself.

Once you acquire the insight to determine what success means for you, you’ll be more mindful of the actions that lead to greater success … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations? 

You should never enter a negotiation without having defined what a successful outcome is. You should also define what a less than stellar outcome will look like. Even if you must exit a negotiation prior to its end, you can still view it as a success. It could be viewed as such when considering the time you might have wasted in an endless loop that was going nowhere.

During your strategy planning stage of your negotiation, highlight what a successful outcome will look like and mean to you. Make sure you assess what you think it will mean and look like for your negotiation counterpart too. With a picture of the meaning of success for both of you, you’ll have a greater understanding of how he’s feeling if it starts to slip from him. That, in turn, will allow you to use the illusion of success to keep him on that path or reward him by giving the presence of success back to him. Regardless of your choice, you’ll be in a stronger negotiation position, and that’s something that every negotiator seeks.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Illusion, #Success #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #liars #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

 

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How to Use One Secret Trick of Good Negotiators

“To obtain more, ask for more. And, know when to ask.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

There’s one secret trick that good negotiators use that allows them to obtain more from every negotiation they’re in. Do you know what it is?

Good negotiators ask for more than they expect to receive. But wait, there’s more! It’s not just that they ask for more, it’s the way they ask, and the timing that allows them to get more.

Characteristics of Questioner:

The way you make a request should be in part, based on the character of the person you’re asking. Some people are brisk (i.e. get to the point), others are more sociable (i.e. let’s take our time). Thus, it would not behoove you to pose the same type of request to the people possessing the characteristics mentioned. If you did, your request might be met by one and not the other, or neither of them, due to the way you posed the question. In either case, you’d be gambling on the outcome. Posing the right question in the manner that’s more receptive to the characteristics of the person to whom you’re asking a question enhances that outcome.

Verbiage Use:

“Can you …”, “Will you …”, “I need …”, “I want …” are forms of openings to a question that will psychologically appeal to different personality types. To maximize the probability of obtaining what you seek, mimic the verbiage used by the person you’re seeking the outcome from. If you observe that she predominantly uses, “can you help me” when requesting assistance, use that phrase on her. It will have an echoing effect on her; that means, the words will sound like something she’s heard before. That’ll be true to her because they will be the words that she uses. That will place her in a mindset to grant your request more readily.

Setup and Timing:

The one main advantage you have over the other person is the fact that you know you’re going to make a request. The timing of when you do will impact the probability of a successful outcome. To enhance that outcome, consider probing by asking questions that aren’t as direct as the one you plan to use (e.g. What do you think about …?). Be careful not to give too much insight about your real intent. If you do, you might be weakening your efforts.

Another tactic you can utilize is to make a request that’s significantly more than what you’re seeking. Then, by comparison, the smaller request won’t appear to be as large.

Situational and Positional Power:

Along with timing, consider when you have situational or positional power. You have situational power when you’re in a situation where you’re perceived by others as being powerful (i.e. police officer with red lights flashing). Positional power stems from the position you hold at the time when you’re perceived as being in control (i.e. boss over subordinate).

During such times, you’ll be able to make requests with an enhanced probability of having them granted.

Asking for more in any negotiation will always enhance the probability that you’ll obtain more. But you must know how to properly execute your requests to enhance that probability. Using the insights above will do just that for you … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Trick #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How Will You Know When It’s Time to Leave?

“Staying too long in any environment depletes your resolution for change.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

When was the last time you found yourself wondering, why am I still here? What purpose is being here serving me? Sometimes, those questions beckon to the beginning of a new journey. They serve as an indicator of change in your life. Those feelings usually manifest themselves in some subliminal emotion you sense. They nudge at your consciousness. They do so in an attempt to move you. They’re saying, it’s time to move on. Pay attention to those emotional signals because they’re calls from the future. They’re summoning you to move from where you are to where you’ll be. In paying attention, take note of the direction you move in. Those same emotions will gently speak to your consciousness along your journey’s path. They’ll indicate to what degree you’re moving in the right direction.

If you think about it, you’ve been moved by silent thoughts and stimuli that have gently moved you out of one environment and into another throughout your whole life. More than likely, when you were younger, you were not aware when those silent thoughts provoked you. At some point, you acquired that recognition. When you did, that was the awakening of a higher sense of awareness that you’d invoked within yourself.

When you sense that it’s time to move on, know what’s motivating you and name it. Assess if you’re attempting to escape an environment or moving towards a greater goal. It’s important to recognize the main source of motivation because, once you identify it, you’ll have greater insight into what caused you to move. There’s a difference between moving away from and moving towards something. The difference resides in the motivation.

To determine the degree you’ve improved, set goals. As you progress towards the achievement of a goal, have mile-markers that indicate the progress you’ve made. By noting that, you’ll know when you need to make a course correction. That will also be the signal that indicates whether it’s time to leave the path you’re on to seek another.

Never be afraid to realign your actions to achieve greater goals. You were not meant to stop striving forward. That only occurs when you die. So, no matter the turmoil you experience, no matter the perceived setbacks you encounter, never be fearful of leaving an environment that no longer serves you. The longer you stay in a debilitating environment, the more debilitated you’ll become. You’ll have less time to revel in the success you seek. If you note the progress you’re making along the path of life’s journey and you’re willing to leave a path that’s going nowhere, you’ll find a better path for your life … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

Many negotiators have found themselves stuck in a negotiation long after they should have departed. When it comes to negotiations, the longer you stay engaged, the more likely you are to make unnecessary concessions.

If you find that things aren’t going to your satisfaction, consider points that you might use to exit. In such a case, knowing when it’s time to leave can save you a lot of time, anxiety, and stress. And, as a negotiator, that’s something you don’t want or need.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Time, #Success #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #liars #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

‘Body Language Hands’ – How to Immediately Win More Negotiations

“People use their hands to add meaning to their words. To capture more of their meaning, listen to their hands.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Do you observe the body language of someone’s hands when you’re negotiating? To win more negotiations, you should listen to their hands! Hands convey a lot of hidden information in a negotiation.

There’s so much information conveyed by the way someone uses their hands. People use them to show appreciation by clapping. They display their hands to exhibit displeasure in other ways (i.e. sitting on their hands).  They also use their hands when speaking? Hands give insight into the thought process that someone has. As someone is speaking, their hands add or detract from the message they’re delivering; you do the same when you’re conveying information, too.

When there’s a difference between someone’s words and their body language, pay more attention to their body language. It will disclose someone’s intent more than their words. Consider the following lightly when conversing with someone. Consider it more strongly when you’re negotiating.

Hands close to the body:

The closer someone has their hands to their body, the more guarded are their thoughts. You’ll see this display when someone senses perceived threats to their well-being. Their hands are in that position to protect themselves from perceived indifference.

If you see this in a negotiation, it may behoove you to put the other negotiator at ease. Based on what caused him to display his guarded gesture, you may have to address that point before you can induce the comfort you seek to invoke in him.

Hands with interlocking fingers :

When you observe a negotiator in this position, he could be displaying a demeanor that states that he’s not open to your offer, suggestion, or counteroffer. To confirm your observance, consider questioning him about the meaning of his display (e.g. I noticed you have your hands closed and your fingers locked. That usually means that someone (use ‘someone’ to avoid ‘you’ – the latter may make him defensive) is not open to something that has occurred. Is anything wrong?). Then, note his response. If he unlaces his fingers and opens his hands, while saying everything is okay, ask him to proceed. Two things will have happened. One, you will have altered his body language, which will entice him to become more mentally receptive to you and your offers. Two, you will have given him the lead in the negotiation. Based on what he does with it, he’ll give insight about what caused the initial display that you brought into question. And, he’ll give vision to what he’d like to discuss. That will highlight what’s important to him.

Hands pushed away palms out:

Take special note of this gesture because it indicates that the originator wants no part of what caused him to display the gesture. You can note future discernment by the degree that he forces this gesture outward. Also, be aware of this gesture when the other negotiator voices his assertion that he’s in agreement with you. In this case, his body language belies his true feelings. Believe that more than his words.

There are other hand gestures that give insight into a negotiator’s thought process. We’ll leave those to discuss at another time. For now, note the signals mentioned above. In so doing, you’ll be more perceptive. That will assist you in winning more negotiations … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

But Wait, There’s More – Negotiation Insight

“Never forget that you have the power to choose what you wish others to see in you.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

When do you reflect upon where you are in your life? Does it occur when you’re beset by misfortune or when you’re in a state of exhilaration? It’s a thought that warrants attention because you’re always being moved by your thoughts. And, your thoughts transfer into actions.

When you’re in a certain mental state, note the words you use to represent that mindset to yourself and others. Words have power. Thus, the way you use them will influence your actions and that of those around you. When you muse to others and yourself about what you’re thinking or how you feel, you’re giving insight into your personality. That insight allows others to assess who you are, what you might do in a situation, and how they might interact with you during those times.

Anytime you’re not feeling normal, whatever that might be for you, and you don’t wish to expose it, cloak it by displaying a different demeanor. If you’re a frequent reader of my writings, you know you’re always negotiating; that means, what you do today impacts tomorrow’s opportunities or lack of. You don’t have to consider your actions as being a negotiation. Nor do you have to consider air as a vital part of life. Nevertheless, both are truisms.

To achieve more, you must be mindful of how you represent yourself to others. The more you wish others to perceive a certain persona, the more aligned your actions should be with that persona. If you leave people with the thought that there’s more to you than they know, you’ll have them in a state of wonderment that states, but wait there’s more. That will heighten their intrigue of you, which will serve to increase their interest … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

Predictability vs. Unpredictability

During a negotiation, a collage of thoughts, words, and actions will attempt to drive the negotiation down different paths. The predominant collection of that makeup will determine your success; another consideration will be your past demeanor. The latter will serve as input about how you’ll respond to certain stimuli.

In a negotiation and in every aspect of your life, people will believe of you what they see. Sure, they’ll color their perception based on their biases. The rub is, if you don’t present yourself based on how you wish to be perceived, they’ll fill in the blanks without your input. Don’t wonder as you wander. Show others what you want them to see in you.

People like predictability. But, if you want to win more negotiations, they’ll be times when it behooves you to be unpredictable. During such times, leave others wondering if there’s more to you to uncover. Doing so will serve your benefit. They won’t be able to completely figure you out. Thus, they’ll lack the ability to predict what you’ll do next. That’ll serve to foil their negotiation plans. To keep them off-balance, create a state of mind for them that says, but wait, there’s more.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#HiddenValue, #More, #Aware, #Success #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #liars #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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Be Aware of the Straw Man

“Always attempt to control those that attempt to control you. By doing so, you’ll have greater control.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Are you aware when others invoke a straw man to maneuver you? Be alert to such actions. Those actions may leave you instilled in fear. Worse, they may leave you confused about why you engaged in an action.

Straw man has several meanings. It can refute a response that veers from the initial point while giving the appearance of addressing it. As an example, a supervisor might say to his boss, “The team worked a lot of overtime to get the project in on time. I think we should give them a 2% bonus.” The boss’ response, “That’s horrible thinking! If we gave a bonus every time they did their job, there would be no incentive for them to do anything.” The boss’ rebuttal, while appearing to respond to the supervisor, ignored the overtime the employees worked to get the project in on time. It ignored that they went above their normal duties.

A straw man can also refer to a person lacking in integrity or substance. An example of this might be, “As he felt backed into a corner, he said, you can do to me as you like, but my followers will make you pay for your deeds.” The reference to, ‘my followers’, was an attempt to conjure up a straw man that would seek retribution.

Suffice it to say, always attempt to control those that are attempting to control you. In so doing, you’ll be in a better position to maintain control of yourself … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations? 

Who uses a straw man?

During a negotiation, a straw man can be invoked to foster a position to embolden its user. It might be employed to inject fear, reward, happiness, or retribution into the negotiation process. If stealthily employed, it can give the appearance of its user’s fingerprints not even being on the suggested deed (e.g. one negotiator to the other – they may harm both of us if we adopt that position). Thus, it can be one way to insulate one’s activities from any blowback. In this case, think of the straw man as being the image that one wants to cast that’s greater than the image of the one doing the casting.

Why are straw men used?

a straw man is yet another tactic used in a negotiation by savvy negotiators. Some stumble into its usage, not realizing the effect it can have on a negotiation.

When used deftly, this tactic can alter the course of a negotiation by distracting from the point at hand, altering the flow of the negotiation, and casting doubt in the mind of the negotiator that adopts a position.

In your future negotiations, take note when a straw man is attempted to be used against you. Also, consider when it might be beneficial to invoke your own straw man. Doing so will take your negotiation abilities to higher heights.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

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Negotiators: Negotiate Better – Know How to Use Words Right

“Good negotiators listen for what’s not said, in order to hear words right.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

People’s thoughts give life to the words they use to influence others. Thus, their words move people to actions. As a negotiator, to negotiate better, know how to use words right.

Using His Words:

When engaged in a negotiation, listen to the words used by the other negotiator and the way he uses those words. As an example, he makes the statement, “I only want to address one thing at a time.” Later in the negotiation, if he asks you to address multiple items/situations simultaneously, you can state, “I only want to address one thing at a time.” Citing his own words as justification for your actions will psychologically put him into a state of reflection. Note his body language to discern the effect that your words have on him (e.g. leans back resting towards one side of his body, laying a pen/pencil down/aside, looking up into the air). Any such signals will serve as validation that he’s taking your words into his thought process.

Emphasized and Changing Words:

During a negotiation, the opposing negotiator will emphasize certain words. Listen for them. Through his action, he’s denoting the importance that word has in his thought process. You can use that insight to reposition your negotiation efforts to fit the altering situation based on the way he’s thinking.

As an example, if he begins a statement by saying, “Weeee, I think I can do it.” Note the word choice change from ‘we’ to ‘I’. Plus, note how he drew ‘weeee’ out. While making that change, he was likely considering to what degree he’d have to rely on others. By changing his words, he displayed his belief that he has greater control over producing the outcome in question. That display gives you insight into where he believes his abilities lie in that situation. You can clone it by posing similar questions to move him in the direction of your needs throughout the negotiation. That insight will also allow you to cite his pride of authority and position him as such. Then, if you reach a point of decision and he refers to his need to consult others, remind him of what he’s implied about his authority. Even if he states the situation at hand is above his authority, you will have uncovered his limits.

Unspoken Words:

People say a lot through the words they don’t use. Thus, what’s not said can be more important than what’s said. It too gives insight into their thoughts.

During a negotiation, closely observe the word choice used by the other negotiator to convey his thoughts and offers. Consider what he’s not saying and why he may not be using specific words. If you sense he’s attempting to prevent you from uncovering something, ask him about it. Use the words that you believe he’s not saying and observe his reaction. If his reaction is one of dismissiveness, pay attention. You may have stumbled upon a point that requires greater probing.

When people hesitate, pause, or alter their words, they’re giving you insight into their shifting mindset. That shift represents a change in their thinking. If you’re astute, you’ll observe the cause of that action and use it to advantage the negotiation.

From the way you use words to convey your offers, to the way you use the opposing negotiator’s words to shape his perspective, if you use words right in a negotiation you’ll experience greater negotiation outcomes … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

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