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Body Language Human Resources Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“Never Again Be Vulnerable To Hidden Body Language Aggression“ – Negotiation Insight

“Reading body language accurately has many advantages. Detecting hidden aggression is one of them.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert.

 

“Never Again Be Vulnerable To Hidden Body Language Aggression“

 

One member of a negotiation team said to the other, that meeting became ruckus quickly. At first, I couldn’t tell if the other side’s leader was being passive-aggressive, or if he perceived our proposals to be inappropriate or repulsive. But then, I knew he was upset by the body language gestures he emitted. They pointed towards outright aggression. That’s when I knew things were about to get ugly. What body language signs did you observe that indicated he was about to become aggressive, was the question asked by the man’s associate.

When someone’s about to become aggressive, do you know what signs to note? It’s essential to be able to understand the nonverbal and body language signals that indicate imminent hostilities. Doing so will allow you the time to deflect or redirect such efforts. Continue, and you’ll discover five body language signals that foretell pending aggression.

Blustering:

“I’m going to put my foot so far up your rear that it’ll come out of your mouth.” “Yeah! And what do you think I’ll be doing while you’re trying to put your foot up my rear?” Blustering occurs in many forms. When it’s verbal, it’s easy to see and understand. Because words are used to convey one’s sentiments, which decreases the misperception of one’s intent. But blustering also occurs through one’s body language. A person portrays it by puffing out their chest, extending the outreach of their arms on both sides, and even in the stance that slightly projects one foot slightly ahead of the other. In each instance, that person is positioning himself for the pending aggression that’s he’s considering. And, depending on how heated the environment, he may not be consciously aware of the behaviors he’s committing. And that’s why you should take note. By doing so, you’ll have the opportunity to temper his behavior before it reaches the point of uncontrollability.

Eyes:

Darting – When someone is agitated, and they begin quickly scanning the environment with their eyes, they’re in assessment mode. This gesture alone does not indicate pending aggression on this person’s behalf. But coupled with other signs such as flaring nostrils, protruding chin, and fist/hand flexing, darting eyes lends more credence to the probability that pending aggression is increasingly heightening.

Narrowing – When someone’s eye focus becomes narrow, they’re lending more emphasis on the subject of their attention. That means they’re blocking out other distractions to assess what they might do next to thwart the unpleasantness they’re experiencing. When you see someone narrowing their eyes on you, raise your awareness of their pending intent. They may be in the process of becoming aggressive.

Pupil Dilation – Pupil dilation is another silent display that someone exhibits when they get excited. Dilation can occur from the natural excitement one experiences from being in a pleasant environment too. But you can instinctively tell by someone’s demeanor if they’re happy or agitated. That’s also the insight to seek to determine if they’re becoming annoyed by an adverse action they perceive stemming from you.

 

Flaring Nostrils:

Nostril flaring is one of the most telling signs indicating pending aggression. A person flares their nostrils as a way to get more oxygen into their bloodstream. And in adverse situations, that can be the preparation leading to aggression. The more the person engages in that act, the more they’re preparing to become aggressive.

 

Chin/Jaw:

An outward thrust chin is a silent signal stating that the owner of the action is displaying his desire to take a portion of your space. Conversely, when people tuck their chin, they’re demonstrating the need to protect themselves. Thus, you should perceive the outward thrust of someone’s jaw as saying, I’m not afraid of you. If they take a step(s) towards you while displaying that gesture, they’re becoming more defiant and more aggressive. You can stand your ground or back up. If you hold your position, you’ll be stating with your action that you’re not afraid of them either  – now what? In either case, be aware of where tension resides and adopt the measure that’s best suited to combat it.

 

Hand/Fist:

Flexing – If you observe someone flexing their hand in a negative environment, it may be an indication that they’re attempting to loosen up to get more blood flowing to that part of their body.

Tightening – When someone becomes excessively exasperated, they stiffen their hands, which can turn into fists. Thus, while observing the beginning of someone’s hands flexing, note the moment when their hands turn into fists. A heightening in potential aggression has occurred at that moment. And the person may be a moment or so from lashing out at you.

 

Reflection:

Like a snake, you can observe the lynchpin behavior of someone that’s in the process of striking out at you. In the snake’s case, it emits signals through its rattle, warning you of pending danger. Then, if you don’t vacate the surroundings, he strikes you. The same is true of a human. Initially, he gives warning through his body language to get you to back off. And, if you’re persistent at making him feel uneasy, he’ll strike at you.

To avoid harm’s way, note the mentioned signs that lead to aggression. As soon as you sense a verbal or physical attack is imminent, become more observant about the pace of its escalation. And remove yourself from the environment if possible. If that’s not possible, adopt a posture that’s more or less threatening than what’s confronting you. And be aware of the effect this has on your nemesis. In some cases, it will cause him to increase his efforts. In other situations, it may be the form of de-escalation needed to subdue an explosive situation that’s in the making. Know the difference to determine the best action to adopt. Because the optimum word is control – and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#BodyLanguage #Aggression #vulnerable #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiationexamples #Negotiationstrategies #negotiationprocess #negotiationskillstraining #negotiationtypes #negotiationpsychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #TheMasterNegotiator #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

 

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How to Stop a Thief From Taking Your Life

“Life’s most important factor is time. Thus, the way you use your time determines the life you’ll live.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Time is your most precious commodity. Once it’s gone, your life ends. Thus, your time is your life. What you do with it determines what your life will be.

No matter who you are, no matter what you do, every day a thief takes a little bit of your life away from you. Depending upon your complicity in his act, he takes a little or a lot. But he does so every day! Over time, his efforts add up to a staggering loss of your time, viability, and opportunities. Do you know who the thief is? Do you know how to stop him from taking your life? Are you even aware of what he’s doing to you?

For some, it may come as a surprise – for others, it won’t – the thief is you! You’re the one that’s allowing yourself to run awry with your time and your life – thus you can arrest those efforts that aren’t serving you. To do that, become more mindful of how you use your time.

How Your Time is Taken:

There’s a cost to allowing your time to become taken. Do you know what that cost is? Consider calculating the cost of your time in dollars. That should make the squandering of it more meaningful to you.

Every day you’re bombarded by distractive sources that cry out for your attention. They may show up in the form of a friend calling when you’re engaged in more productive activities. They may occur as something in the background that captures your attention that diverts your actions to something less productive. If you’re okay with having your attention diverted, that’s okay. Everyone needs diversions sometimes to re-energize themselves.

The point is, pay attention to anything that proves to be a distraction from endeavors that are more important. They’re your time stealers. And they’re the impediments that will prevent you from reaching higher heights. By the fact that you’re controlling the distractions that detour you from more important tasks should alert you to the need to exercise greater control over such occurrences.

How to Stop Your Time From Being Taken:

Everyone encounters time stealers. Some allow them to occur due to a needed diversion from what may be mundane – they may be seeking something that’s more exciting. Others may do so because they’re fatigued and don’t possess the mental energy required to maintain focus. No matter the reason that your halted, note it. There’s valuable feedback information contained in that reason. You can gain greater insight into yourself and what serves as your motivators.

When you catch yourself diverted from more viable tasks, one way to prevent yourself from losing valuable time is to say aloud, “stop thief”. Doing that will allow your conscious and subconscious mind to become more attuned to how and when you allow yourself to get off track. And you’ll become more aware of how to combat such time thefts.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

Time is the one precious commodity that every negotiator has. Thus, to that degree, all negotiators start off evenly. Even if you’re pressured by time constraints, initially if the other negotiator is unaware of those constraints, you and she are on the same time paradigm. Therefore, the way you utilize your time through the offers you make determines the flow of the negotiation and the degree that it’s beneficial to you.

You can make up for the time that might become lost by anticipating the unexpected and planning for it. Then, should it occur, you’ll be prepared to address those situations without losing time. That’s one way to stop time thefts from preventing you from reaching your goals, which will assist you in achieving greater negotiation outcomes … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams

#stop #thief #life #Secrets #Negotiate #Process #Power #Powerful #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

Are There More Powerful Hidden Secrets Concealed in You?

The more powerful you are, the more powerful you’ll be. To become more powerful quicker, unlock the powerful hidden secrets that reveal your power.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

The evening was turning ugly – It appeared an impasse was at hand. Then, Amie spoke – “since John said he was not trying to insult you and he apologized, how would you feel if what you perceived to be an insult hadn’t occurred? Would you feel better?” With that, Harry said, “I’d feel a lot better.” Then she said, “well, let’s continue from the point of you feeling a lot better.” Everyone smiled, became congenial, and continued with that demeanor for the rest of the evening. Amie’s friend turned to her and said, “I didn’t know you had hidden powers. Are there more powerful hidden secrets concealed in you?”

Tapping Into Your Powers:

Do you know what hidden secret abilities you have? Just because others can’t see your hidden powers doesn’t mean you have to keep them concealed from yourself. Do you know how to tap into them? Those questions were meant to make you think. Because, if you don’t know there are hidden secret abilities in you, you won’t know how to tap into them. To reveal them …

  • First, sense that there’s more power living inside of you. That’s the catalyst, the starting point, at which you’ll move it to a higher sense of self-awareness. To do that …
  • Note how you feel in different environments based on the people you’re with (e.g. their status, their skills, your relationship to them, how they perceive you, how you want them to perceive you).
  • Observe how you feel when others give you feedback through what they say, how they say it, and/or what they do when you’re in different environments. In some cases, you’ll become emboldened. At other times, you may shrink. Take note of why you experienced either. That will allow you to uncover more of your hidden powers.

Embracing Your Powers:

Everyone possesses hidden abilities. You have such secrets concealed in you too. Over time, you’ve accumulated coping strategies that have allowed you to become more powerful. In some cases, you’ve held some of that power back for fear of what might occur if you unleashed it. If you identify fear as a source that prevents you from being more powerful, ask yourself what are you fearful of. And what’s the worst possible outcome that could occur if you confronted that fear. Again, you’ll be tapping into the source of the hidden power within you. That’ll be the beginning process of releasing that power and giving it life.

As you get older, you become more emboldened – you castoff concerns about what others think of you. You state, take me for who and what I am. The point is, you don’t have to wait until you’re older. You can do that right now! Doing so will allow you to unleash more of the powerful hidden secrets concealed in you … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

Sometimes, when negotiators negotiate, they have a tendency to be overly adventuress or overwhelmed at the negotiation table. In either case, their power, or lack of, is the cause of that state. Therefore, you must be aware of what’s motivating you during your negotiations. Too much false bravado can sink you. Too little means you’re leaving too much on the table.

Negotiations occur in every aspect of your daily life. Thus, the better you negotiate in any environment, the greater the outcomes you’ll have. If you’d like to have those greater outcomes occur more frequently, learn to tap into more of the powerful secrets concealed in you.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Secrets #Concealed #Hidden #HiddenSecrets #Negotiate #Process #Power #Powerful #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How to Out-Negotiate and Understand Powerful Handshakes

“When someone shakes your hand, take note of what their other hand is doing. Their other hand heightens the meaning of the handshake.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“During our introduction, I felt uneasy. There was something in his handshake that made me think that he was attempting to project himself as being powerful. I wasn’t really sure what that handshake meant but I knew he was sending me a message.” Those were words spoken by a team member when recalling how he felt at the outset of a negotiation.

Handshakes convey hidden meanings. They are one aspect of body language that people should pay more attention to. They can make you feel powerful, be perceived as powerful, or make you appear weak.

Continue reading to discover the hidden meanings conveyed simply by shaking someone’s hand.

Meaning of Handshakes:

  • Hand on Top – One hand on top of the other person’s hand

    • Normally, the person whose hand is on top is signaling superiority. But, allowing one’s hand to be on the bottom can be a ploy to allow the other person to believe he’s in a superior position.

  • Hard – One that appears to be overbearing

    • A hard handshake can be a sign of attempted intimidation. It can also stem from someone that is naturally strong and unaware of the strength they convey when shaking someone’s hand.
    • One’s perception is what denotes the degree that a handshake is strong or overbearing. If you’ve had prior encounters with the other party and have shaken their hand, you have a basis for comparison in the present situation. If you don’t have that comparison, consider what a normal handshake would be like from someone of the same size, gender, and background.

  • Weak – Lacking power, dainty, gentle

    • Weak handshakes convey the exact opposite meaning of those that are hard. Again, don’t necessarily infer that someone is weak because they deliver a weak handshake. It may be the way they wish you to perceive them at the outset of your meeting.

  • Hand/Arm Jerk – While shaking the hand, a quick movement is made that pulls the hand quickly in a jerking motion in one direction and then pushes it backward in the opposite direction.

    • Sometimes, in a playful setting, friends will engage in such banter. In negotiation settings, this gesture is most likely a subtle signal that the one exhibiting it plans to keep the other negotiator off guard. Take note when receiving such gestures and compare it to what follows.

  • Firm – Not too hard, not too soft, both hands parallel to each other

    • In a negotiation, negotiators state through this gesture that they’re equal and respectful of each other.

The person holding the handshake the longest is the one controlling it – they’re stating that they’re not ready to let go. A normal handshake usually lasts for 3 to 5 upward and downward movements. Any more is excessive, which means it’s being done for a reason.

Here’s the rub. Just because someone extends a weak handshake doesn’t make them weak, nor does a strong handshake make them strong.  It can all be a ploy. That means you can use this ploy as a tactic in your negotiations.

By understanding the meaning of handshakes, you understand more of what’s occurring. Thus, when someone shakes your hand, you can respond based on how you wish them to perceive you. That will alter the setting of any negotiation. That will also empower you … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Handshake #Power #Powerful #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Negotiations Skills Women In Business

Do You Know the Hidden Source of Your Happiness?

“To unveil your sources of happiness, you must know where it lives.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

He spoke with his website designer. After the call, he felt a heightened sense of happiness. As he reveled in his bliss, he assessed his state of pleasure and reflected on why it was in abundance. He realized that those feelings stemmed from that conversation. He thought, “My website will be updated, which means my services and skills will be presented better. That will bring in more business and create more opportunities for me.”

Do you note when you’re happy? Are you aware of the hidden sources of your happiness? Sometimes, we’re happy and we’re not aware of it. It’s usually because we’re not attentive to what put us into an elated state. Are you aware of what causes that lack of recognition?

Continue reading and you’ll discover why it’s important to pay attention to your level of happiness and the benefits gained from doing so.

Know Yourself:

Do you really know what it takes to make you happy? Or, do you leave it to chance? If you relinquish such an important force to chance, without recognizing it, you’re neglecting your wellbeing.

The more attuned you are to your emotions, your dreams, and driving sources of motivation, the easier it’ll be to identify those variables. That means, regardless of your state of mind, you’ll be able to alter it. But to do that, you must be aware of how and when to exercise that control.

The more aware you are of the environments that challenge your happiness, the more opportunities you’ll have to avoid negativity. First, you must know yourself, know what you want, and focus on constantly moving in the direction of your needs and desires.

Accomplishments:

When you sense you’ve made accomplishments, you feel the momentum of progress. And that makes you experience happiness. Conversely, when you’re not making progress, you may feel like you’re in a rut. That diminishes your happiness.

If you’re more aware of your environments and the people in them, you can make better assessments about the probability of outcomes. That’s another reason you should surround yourself with like-minded people. They can serve to help you strive for higher achievements. Their actions can have a profound impact on you and your degree of happiness.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

When negotiating, your emotions sway from one end of the spectrum to the other. At times, they’re like a wild and uncontrollable ride. At other times, they’re akin to a pleasurable stroll on the beach. In either case, your emotions will dictate your actions. Thus, the more aware you are about what causes you happiness, the better you can control your emotions. With that, you’ll be in greater control of your actions when negotiating.

Happiness is truly a state of mind. If you’re more aware of the actions that lead to greater happiness, you’ll be able to induce that state more readily. You’ll also be able to use that skill in times when you might otherwise feel besieged by others, which could lead to unwanted outcomes.

When you learn to control the occurrences that lead to greater happiness, you will have created space where more happiness can reside. That will make you the controller of your happiness quotient … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Happiness #Source #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How Do You Know When You Make Good Decisions?

“Decisions are the stepping stones you make to move from one phase of your life to the next. To be successful, know where each step leads.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

When called into his boss’ office, he was glowing with pride. He thought, “I took a gamble, made the right decision and now I’m going to get that promotion.” As he walked out of his boss’ office for the last time, with his head hung low, he said to no one in particular, “How do you know when you make good decisions if they’re good decisions?” He was fired for making a decision that caused the company to lose its biggest client.

So, what criterion do you use when making decisions? And to what degree do you know or think you’ve made a good decision at the time you make it? Decision making can be dicey. Consider the following when engaging in your decision-making process.

Overall Goals:

Every decision will lead in one direction versus another. The variation may be slight. But, if you make a drastic decision that takes you further from your goals, you will have wasted valuable time and effort. Because that will put more distance between you and your goals. Before implementing major decisions, consider the impact that little decisions will have on your goals.

Where Does It Lead:

To be more mindful of the decisions you make, question yourself about where a decision may lead. Ask yourself, what will be the outcome of the decision you make and how will it impact other decisions? Will the possible outcome be too costly to bear? How will I and those that I care about feel emotionally about the outcome? If you sense a feeling of dread during this phase, it may be a warning to abandon the decision(s) you’re contemplating.

What if:

Play the ‘what if’ game when considering the decisions you’re contemplating. Ask yourself, what would happen if I didn’t make the decision – where would that leave me? Where would I be if I made it? What would happen next? By posing such a series of questions to yourself, you’ll gain deeper thoughts about where a decision might lead. If it leaves you in a place you rather not be, don’t make it – abandon it.

Consequences:

Decisions have consequences. Consider the ones that are more important more carefully. In part, assess the impact a decision will have on your life or those that significantly impact your life. For greater assessment ask yourself, what combined impact will my decisions have on others and how might that affect me, good or bad?

What does this have to do with negotiations?

During a negotiation, you’ll evaluate a countless number of decisions. Some will be easier to make. Because you will have discovered the paths to take during the planning phase.

For those decisions that might bear strong consequences, consider the outcome carefully. If you think a decision may leave you in a good place now but challenge your position later, it may behoove you to forgo it. There’s always another side to consider when considering decisions. Don’t ignore the consequences of that other side. Don’t make decisions in haste – there may be unforeseen consequences.

Even when a decision can appear to be the light at the end of a tunnel, that light can be a train coming at you. Be mindful of how, with who, and when you make decisions. The more you examine the possibilities of where they may lead, the better a handle you’ll have on the decisions to make … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Decisions #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

Negotiator – Do You Know How to be More Powerful?

“Power is perceptional. To control the perception of power, control how it’s perceived.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“The patient fussed with her fur coat as she sauntered up to the doctor’s receptionist. “I have an appointment in 15 minutes with the doctor. Is she on time to see her special patients today?” The receptionist replied with a taunt to her tone, “The doctor’s patients are all special to her. She’ll see you soon.” With that, the receptionist left her station and engaged in other activities.

Are you aware that you can be perceived as more powerful by the way you present yourself? Do you know how to be more powerful as a negotiator? Continue reading and you’ll discover how to enhance your power in your negotiations.

Display of Empathy:

In the story above, the patient ‘sauntered’ into the doctor’s office, fussing with her fur coat and positioned herself as the doctor’s special patient. She projected an image of someone that was self-absorbed. Had she taken the time to observe the receptionist’s activities, commented about them and conveyed a pleasantry, the patient would have been displaying empathy. In doing so, she would have enhanced her power. Instead, she diluted it.

The display of empathy towards another’s plight is one way to bond with that individual. It also says subliminally that you’re not just concerned about yourself. You recognize the other person for what they’re dealing with.

Never discount the value or role that empathy plays in any interaction. It humanizes you while strengthening the emotional ties between people. And that enhances power.

Your Persona:

I’m the king. Bow down to me – Not! When you project an image of self-aggrandizement, some people will rebuff you. They’ll be appalled at the perception you have of yourself, which will cause them to become rigid to your request. While such a persona may work favorably with some people, over time, they too will become tired of it. Then, they will seek ways to avoid or demean you.

Your persona changes over the course of your life. Always attempt to align it with how you’d like to be perceived. During a negotiation, you can dilute a powerful position simply because your persona rubs someone the wrong way.

Demeanor When Rebuffed:

When you’re rebuffed, how do you feel? I’m sure your answer is dependent on who the person is, what the subject matter was, and where it occurred. Just as your answer depends on those variables, so it does with those you engage with.

To possess more power, limit its display to environments where it’s less likely challenged (e.g. boss vs. subordinate, etc.). In addition, if you know you’ll be in an unfriendly environment, have retorts ready that will subdue the subject of the rebuff. Just make sure you don’t escalate the situation and cause yourself distress.

Some of the reasons people are perceived as more or less powerful are mentioned above. There are more reasons but let those be a starting point. To enhance your negotiation efforts and outcomes, always be mindful of how you’re perceived. To the degree it fits the negotiation, align your perceived power based on the person you’re negotiating with. If it’s not perceived as being threatening or overbearing and that’s what you’re striving to achieve, you will have aligned the perception of your power successfully. That will make you appear to be more powerful … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#power #powerful #Negotiate #Negotiations #bodylanguage #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

There’s No Shame in Ignorance

“There’s no shame in being ignorant. The shame comes from not dispelling it.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body language Expert

“Alexa, who is Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator and Body Language Expert? Sorry, I don’t know that” was Alexa’s reply.

Do you think Alexa felt shame about not knowing the answer to that question – it didn’t? Alexa is artificial intelligence. It’s programmed to acquire knowledge. You’re like that too. You acquire knowledge and that reduces your ignorance. There should be no shame associated with engaging in that process.

Ignorance is a lack of knowledge. Everyone is ignorant of many things. So, why do people become shamed by it? This article explores that. And it abates the uneasiness that partners with ignorance.

The Stigma of Ignorance:

Sometimes, there’s a self-degrading stigma attached to ignorance. It generates embarrassment within the person possessing it. Don’t allow that to happen to you. And don’t allow others to weaponize ignorance against you. Understand your uniqueness. Use that as a shield. Then, if you want to become more knowledgeable about a subject, do so because it’s your desire. Don’t let others control you through their ignorance of who you are.

Self-Esteem:

Your self-esteem may come into question when asked for wisdom on a topic you don’t know. Momentary fear may kick in, depending on the circumstances. That dilemma can cause you angst.

If you’re stupefied by a question, alter your self-perspective. There’s nothing wrong with you. You just don’t know. If the subject matter is important, you can acquire knowledge. Don’t let it mentally debilitate you.

Fear of Unknown:

Do you fear not knowing the answers to questions simply because you don’t know what’s being sought? There are times when you become mentally constipated because of what you believe others think of you. Note when that happens. Allay your emotions by thinking that no one knows everything – there are things the person posing questions don’t know. Plus, you give your mental power to others when you allow them to control your self-perception.

Perception of Peers:

You may become daunted by ignorance when considering what friends and associates think of you because you lack knowledge in a certain area. If they’re ‘real friends’, you should be able to express your ignorance without fear of the negative perception of rejection. If that’s a concern, you can always push-back by saying, please reduce my ignorance or reveal your own. No one can make you feel ignorant. Only you have that power. Since you control it, control its perception.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

When negotiating, ignorance can open the door to fear. And fear can throw your negotiation off kilter. By planning extensively for an upcoming negotiation, you can reduce fear – do so by reducing unknown aspects that might cause it to occur. That means, during the planning process, consider as many variables as possible. Plan for them and have strategies ready to deal with situations that might threaten your negotiation position. Being prepared will disperse fears of where you might unwantedly venture into the negotiation. You will also cast the demon of ignorance into the dungeons of anonymity … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Fear #shame #ignorance #ignorant #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

What Scares You?

“Sometimes, your imagination scares you. To assess your fears, check your unchecked thoughts.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“… The thought of that scared me. My focus was on what others would think if I failed.” An executive manager of a major international corporation spoke those words. I suggested that he shift his paradigm from thinking about failure, and what others would think, to one more positive.

Have you ever considered what scares you? While you might be frightened of some things, they may be the doorway that leads to greater opportunities. There are things that you should shy away from. Therefore, I’m not suggesting you go head-first into everything that scares you. Instead, reflect on the benefits that might reside within your fears.

Consider the following thoughts when assessing how, whether, and when you should embrace things that frightened you.

Identify what scares you:

Before you can address your fears, you must identify them. You should also identify why you’re lending legitimacy to them. In identifying them, note their origins. Do they stem for a hurt you experienced in the not too distant past, or do they stem from some further hidden source? The better you are at identifying the source of what scares you, the better you’ll be at assembling a plan to deal with those fears.

Assessment:

While assessing the source of your fears, assess if it’s something that you should rightfully be afraid of. Fear can serve as a warning. Thus, there are some things that you should avoid. In your assessment, label what’s real and what’s imagined when it comes to what scares you.

Imagination:

When we were kids, we dealt with things that frightened us by using imaginary forces. We even created imaginary friends. The point is, we used our mind to help us live in the reality we wanted for ourselves. We can still use our mind for that purpose. When confronting what scares you, imagine what will happen when you overcome your fear by addressing the thing that scares you. Imagine you’re receiving accolades for doing so. Now, how does that make you feel? It should make you feel good. After all, you’re only imagining it, which means, you’re in complete control … as you are always.

You can find motivation from the above thoughts and allow them to move you to action. Or, you can choose not to address your fears. But If you’re serious about achieving greater success in life, you must commit to challenging the things that jeopardize that success, that which scares you. After making that commitment, your life will instantly be on a straighter road to success … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

When negotiating, the fears of adopting one position versus another may cause you angst. But if you’ve considered the unexpected offers that might occur beforehand you will have planned on how to address them. That should allay your fear.

Nevertheless, if you’re caught by a scary situation, don’t show it through any body language and/or nonverbal signals (e.g. mouth agape, widened eyes). You don’t want the other negotiator to sense his momentary advantage. Instead, go into quandary body language display mode (e.g. hand on chin head cocked to one side, or chin resting in hand and on side of face). This action will give you time to think, while the other negotiator wonders what you’re thinking about. If you display a cunning smile while doing so, you may evoke fear in him.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Fear #scare #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

Do You Know What Really Makes You Happy?

“Happiness is your state of mind that only exists when you think it does.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

One day you’re up. The next day you’re down, and so the yo-yo goes. Maybe the ups and downs are not daily, but it occurs to a degree in everyone’s life. Do you know the frequency of your ups and downs? Do you know what really makes you happy?

There’s a reason you should take account of your happiness quotient. It’s the doorway to accomplishing greater achievements. It’s also the doorway that leads to the perception of you leading a better life.

Consider the following insights to note your degree of happiness, what sparks it, and what might cause it to decline.

Self-Psychology:

Know the triggers that lead to happiness and unhappiness. Those two boundaries will be your guardrails that trip your inner silent alarm. Even if you encounter an abundance of happiness, sensitize yourself to how it occurred. You can use those stimuli to acquire greater happiness. That will serve as a motivator to spur you to higher heights. The point is, know what motivates you to stride forward faster and you’ll be more aware of how to do so.

Happiness:

Everyone has a slightly different definition of happiness. To understand the impact that happiness has on you, define what it means to you. Not doing so subjects you to the whims of life’s occurrences. You’ll relinquish control to those dictates and they, not you, will determine when you’re happy and when you’re not.

Unhappiness:

In my writings, presentations, and trainings, I’ve suggested to people worldwide that they note what makes them unhappy. Some have responded by saying, “why would I focus on negativity – that’ll only serve to make me unhappier”. Think about that for a moment. If you didn’t know what a hot stove felt like, you’d be more likely to touch it and get burned. How many times would you want that to occur? The point is, yin and yang are the boundaries of happiness. And unhappiness is the yin in that equation. The more you’re aware of what makes you unhappy, the more clarity you’ll have about how to avoid it.

Friends:

There are some things that we’re more passionate about than others; longtime friends can fall into that category. While some longtime friends can provide a form of happiness, you should be aware of the impact they have on other aspects of your life. In some cases, their views and opinions may no longer support the goals you’re seeking to achieve. If that’s the case, know the value that they add to your happiness quotient. You don’t have to discard them, just appreciate them for the value they add to your life from a different perspective.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

The degree of happiness you experience when negotiating will impact your degree of engagement. Happiness is an unseen ally that’ll allow you to think more clearly from which greater ideas will flow. It will also serve as the tool that unlocks your ability to make better offers and counteroffers.

The more you’re aware of what ignites your degrees of happiness when you’re negotiating and how to temper unhappiness, the better you’ll be when negotiating … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Happy#Success #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions