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“Avoid Danger In Negotiations – How To Control Conversations Better” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

“To avoid danger, control the conversations that lead to it. And, to do that, know how to control conversations.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

 

 

Click here to get the book!

“Avoid Danger In Negotiations – How To Control Conversations Better”

 

Two agents were working undercover as they discussed an update with their informant. They were seated in a recessed area in an attempt to keep their conversation private and to avoid danger. They wanted to control the environment as much as possible. Suddenly, a panhandler walked over and aggressively began to ask for money. One agent said pleasantly, no. But the person persisted by asking, why not? The agent said, no, again. Still, the person continued their plea for money. Finally, the agent growled as he said in a loud voice, I said no! Stunned, the beggar turned and quickly walked away.

Potential danger always surrounds you, even during negotiations (you’re always negotiating). In some cases, you avoid it by staying outside of its bounds. At other times, you prevent it by the way you control conversations in an environment.

When the agents turned their attention back to their update, the informant asked, did you think that person was dangerous? The agent said, no. That beggar didn’t accept my answer the first few times. So, I had to alter the delivery of my words. By changing the tone of my reply and sounding more hostile, the panhandler sensed my, no, response as being more definitive. That’s why he walked away at that point.

Consider the following techniques to increase your control as you negotiate with those that might attempt to be defiant or with those that you’d like to control better.

 

Block and Bridge

Block and bridge is one way to alter the flow of a conversation. You’d implement its use as a conversation began to head in an unwanted direction – one that you feared would cause you to lose control of the discussion or interaction. You might also consider employing it when you wanted to enhance the flow of a conversation.

To invoke its use, when someone began making statements that you disagreed with, or citing accounts not aligned with where you wanted to take the conversation, block their comments. As an example, you can say, you have a point (block), and the outcome was less than expected (bridge). I suggest we take the following approach. It’s known to have better results.

The manner you block someone’s comments depends on the severity of the situation. If it’s one that might escalate to a high degree of irritation, you might consider blocking the other person’s statements with a harsh tone and words. If that’s not required, consider being milder in your intonation and demeanor.

 

Answering Questions With Questions

Answering questions with questions is an excellent way to gather more information than you give. It also allows you to control a conversation. Because the person asking questions is controlling the flow of the discussion. And that occurs as long as the other party is answering questions.

To implement this strategy, ask a question in response to one that’s asked of you. Do this instead of answering the initial query. Thus, instead of providing an answer to that question, you’d respond with one of your own.

As an example, if someone says, do I have to take this course of action? Your response might be, what do you think will happen if you don’t take this course of action? You’ve not answered the question. And if you get a response, you’ve gained more insight into the individual’s thoughts. Along with a possible solution to a situation if you choose to implement that person’s response.

 

Listening To What’s Not Said

Many people consider themselves good communicators because they pay attention to what someone says. In reality, you can be a better communicator and control conversations better by observing what’s someone doesn’t say.

As an example, if someone said, I didn’t do what you said I did. You might consider a person’s answer to mean, I didn’t do what you said I did. Yes, I did it, but not the way you stated it.

By listening for what’s not said, and the response of how something’s said, you’ll gain better insight and control of someone’s statements. You’ll also know more about how that person is communicating. And that will be worth its weight in gold.

 

Reflection  

In every environment, and every negotiation you’re in, think about how you’ll control that environment. In particular, consider how you’ll avoid dangerous situations, what form of control you’ll use, and where that might take you in your encounter. Because the better you control conversations, the more power and control you’ll have in every negotiation and situation that you’re in … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

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Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Negotiations Sales Women In Business

“Negotiator – Is There Hidden Power In The Inferiority Myth” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

“Inferiority is a myth that can enslave your mind. But only if you allow it to do so.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

 

Click here to get the book!

 

“Negotiator – Is There Hidden Power In The Inferiority Myth”

 

Is there a hidden power in the inferiority myth? In its purest form, it’s nothing more than a belief or disbelief that people accept or reject. The illusion exists in its ability to manipulate the thoughts of others for good or bad. Therefore, you should assess whether myths are good or bad, by the way, you and others view them. After all, they shape people’s perspectives and opinions.

You’re continuously negotiating in all of your environments. And, as a negotiator, you should use every asset that’s available to enhance your efforts. The inferiority myth is one tool you can use to do that.

The following are ways to use inferiority myths.

  • Embolden others to feel good about themselves (e.g., I don’t think you’re inferior to anyone.)

 

  • As a source of neutrality (e.g., I always found everyone in your group/area to be open, honest, and easy to deal with. And I know dealing with you will be the same way.)

 

  • Perpetrate a stereotype that reflects the negative thoughts others have of an individual or group and cast yourself on the opposite side of that paradigm – This says, I respect you. We’re looking at this from the same perspective. I’m on your side (This is the good cop in the good cop, bad cop, scenario.)

 

  • Use to cast others as being inferior to you – Note: it takes a particular mindset to accept this pronouncement. Therefore, you should be mindful of whom you attempt to project this. Some people will perceive such sentiments as being derogatory. And this my insight them to become rigid, which may lead to confrontation or hostilities.

 

  • Use to cast yourself as being inferior to others – While most individuals seek to project strength, to appear in control, there are times when a demur posture can be beneficial. Casting yourself as being inferior can help that façade. Once again, be mindful of whom you project that image. While it will allow you to maintain a better position with some people, it can be to your detriment with others.

 

  • Use to cast your target’s group as being inferior to him (e.g., Why are you with them? You’re so much better than they are.) While this may work to separate individuals in a group from the group, it may backfire (i.e., He’s like my brother. And I’m just like him and proud of it!). So be cautious about with whom you attempt this.

 

  • Project yourself as a victim of perceived inferiority to the person you’re engaged with (e.g., Are you saying that I’m inferior to you? Why would you think that and why would you feel that way?) This can be the prelude to you feigning heightened aggression or agitation. You’d use this strategy with someone respectful of your authority who you want to restrain mentally. If you attempt to implement this with more strident individuals, you run the risk of encouraging them to become obstinate. So, be cautious. You don’t want to inflame anyone’s ire. That can lead to increased tensions.

 

As in every situation you encounter, you’re negotiating. Thus, as a negotiator, you’re always setting expectations. Some people will attempt to live up to them, while others will strive to live down to them. Hence, you must be sure you set the correct expectation based on the outcome you seek.

To set better expectations based on the inferiority myth, consider the source of power confronting you. If it’s potential trouble, you may suggest that the source’s ability is inferior. If that force is more amenable to follow your commands, indicate that everyone is on the right path (e.g., people that work together create more significant outcomes).

The point is, when employing the inferiority myth, make sure it serves the overall outcome you’re attempting to achieve. Anything less will put your efforts in jeopardy. That will cause unwanted anxiety and stress, which can add to a situation’s decline. Using myths correctly can be a valuable aid, but only if you use them properly. Once you do, you’ll be able to subdue challenges that, in the past, may have gotten out of hand … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Power #InferiorityMyth #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiation examples #Negotiation strategies #negotiation process #negotiation skills training #negotiation types #negotiation psychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

 

 

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Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“How To Use Someone’s Prejudices To Your Advantage” – Negotiation Insight

“Someone’s prejudices can be harmful or beneficial. The perspective depends on who’s making the assessment.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

 

Click here to get the book!

“How To Use Someone’s Prejudices To Your Advantage”

As a couple entered a restaurant, the hostess muttered to no one in particular – they must be confused. They appear to be destitute. To annoy the maître d’, she seated the couple in a prominent space. She wanted to use his prejudices against him and to her advantage. They had a long-running feud. And this was her way of irritating him.

When the maître d’ observed where the couple was sitting, he looked skyward and said, help me, lord. He hurried to the hostess and asked in a very sharp tone, why did you seat those people in that area? You know I don’t like individuals that appear out of place. They’ll detract from the ambiance and ruin the aura of the environment! The hostess smirked and said, you’re right – I did know that. She had just taken an opportunity to needle the maître d’ and use his prejudices to her advantage.

 

The previous story is an example of how someone’s prejudices can be used to your advantage. Doing so can stretch across different environments and occur in many settings. Think of the following when considering how you’ll advantage your position by using someone’s prejudices in your interactions with them.

 

Gender Consideration:

When taking into account the role someone’s gender may play in addressing their preferences, don’t allow that to be a significant factor. Instead, place a greater emphasis on the situation and the personality type of the individual. Some people may respond to situational exchanges that mimic the opposite sex of their gender. To possess a mindset of, she’s just a woman – she wouldn’t do that, can place you in a disadvantaged position.

 

Identifying Sources of Prejudices:

Before considering how you can use someone’s prejudices to your advantage, you must know what they value and why. Without this insight, you’ll never know which of their biases will be of most benefit to you. To gain insight:

  • Play the part – This means appearing as others in the environment to fit into your target’s perception of what’s normal – If you look out of place, you might incur their raft. And this would place you at a disadvantage. The more you appear like someone and their environment, the more they’ll see themselves in you.

 

When would you want to use someone’s prejudices to your advantage?

There can be a host of reasons that warrant using someone’s biases against them to increase your position.

  • Compliance – In some cases, you may want an individual to comply with your commands or desires. You may be in a position where force could be used to accomplish that. But that should not be your first action. Force can sometimes lead to the escalation of a situation, which in turn could lead to a loss of control.

 

  • Crisis – In crises, not only should you consider using someone’s prejudices against them, depending on the direness of the crisis, this ploy may be the best tool to use.

 

  • Guilt/shame – Someone’s prejudices can be used to create a sense of shame or guilt because the individual has strayed outside the bounds of his norms. By persuading the individual to view himself differently, you begin to influence his thought process, which can lead to you controlling his mind and thoughts.

 

  • Gather information – If you seek to gain information about the target’s associates, you can affirm his prejudices. He’ll view you as being like himself and his associates, which will usually free someone’s tongue to wag with hordes of insights and information.

 

  • Create an ally/turn against others – This is another case where appearing to be like your target can attract an intense affinity for you from him. Once a strong bond exists, the possibility will occur to turn this person against those that confront you. If you are outnumbered, creating a divide in this manner can enhance your odds.

 

Reflection:

Prejudices are inherent in everyone. Thus, they’ll be times when you can take advantage of their predispositions to increase your position. Knowing when and how to do so will give you a huge advantage when dealing with people … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

# Use, Someone, Prejudices, Advantage #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiation examples #Negotiation strategies #negotiation process #negotiation skills training #negotiation types #negotiation psychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

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“How to Stop Biases From Turning Into Abuse” – Negotiation Insight

“Abuse stems from biases. And prejudice is the stem from which it grows.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

 

Click here to get the book!

“How to Stop Biases From Turning Into Abuse”

 

Every time he wore a red tie, she felt her feelings change towards him. At first, he didn’t notice when the changes occurred. Then, over time, he sensed the difference in her actions. Her disposition wasn’t unpleasant – she was not as approachable as she was usually. In return, he responded to her change by not being as agreeable to her. Neither of these individuals realized it, but they were interacting with each other based on the biases they possessed.

When people engage others, their biases drive the interaction. Thus, you should always be mindful of how you act based on the environment, those in it, and the thoughts you have about both. You should make the same assessment from the other person’s viewpoint too. If you’re not aware of the effect that has on you or them, you can become the target for abuse or an abuser.

To stop biases from turning into abuse, consider these factors:

  • How might specific triggers cause you to become irrational, and what exactly might you do in such a state?
  • What thoughts are driving you to view your current situation in a particular manner, and could it lead to hostilities?
  • Are you conflating past occurrences with the present one? If so, why?
  • What powers are you conceding by not controlling thoughts that could lead to you committing negative actions?
  • What are your thoughts and beliefs about the people in the environment, and do they stem from hidden prejudices you possess or those with whom you associate?
  • What actions are others in the environment engaged in that might cause you to have disdain for them?
  • How might you treat someone if you have contempt for them based on the beliefs that you share with others that dislike the same people?
  • Are you attempting to impress others by acting a particular way in your present environment?

The point of the questions above is to make you think. And to hopefully do so before a situation driven by your own or someone else’s biases cause you or others to become abusive. In times of heightened tension, regardless of its cause, if you don’t apply a brake to your automatic thought process, that process could lead to unwanted outcomes.

So, before entering into a situation that might escalate due to unseen or unspoken biases, consider how you might guard against them and how you might control an environment should they occur. The better prepared you are to deal with challenges that can escalate and become uncontrollable, the better you’ll be at spotting and containing those possibilities. That will put you in better control of yourself, others, and the environments you’re in … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What does this have to do with negotiations?

 

Every negotiator brings biases into a negotiation. They may originate from thoughts about certain ethnicities and how they respond or act with people from other backgrounds. They can also stem from sexual orientation, gender difference, or a host of mitigating thoughts. Some may derive from misguided beliefs that others possess that a negotiator may admire or aspire to emulate.

Regardless of there source(s), biases can negatively impact a negotiation. Therein lies the reason negotiators must be mindful of the prejudices that may exist in a situation. If one is not observant and doesn’t have a plan to deal with it, the unprepared negotiator can find himself dealing with dire occurrences. In reality, those acts may be red herrings intended to thwart your efforts by demeaning you. A deeper intent may be to push you away from the negotiation so that someone of more liking can get engaged.

Never underestimate the power and destruction that biases can have on an interaction. They can quietly erode your power and sap your mental energy. If you neglect such a force, you may be doing so at your delayed peril.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Bias #Abuse #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiation examples #Negotiation strategies #negotiation process #negotiation skills training #negotiation types #negotiation psychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

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“How To Spot Lies To Be A Better Negotiator” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“To spot lies, observe body language. Body language will leak lies that words omit.” – Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

 

 

Click here to get the book!

“How To Spot Lies To Be A Better Negotiator”

 

“I wasn’t sure what I was sensing. But the story didn’t seem right. I didn’t know if it came from the man’s darting eyes, or his constant lip licking. He seemed nervous. And that increased my suspicion of his guilt.” Those were the words of a police officer recounting his thoughts to a supervisor. He’d just captured a criminal that had been on the lam for decades.

One researcher found most people lie in everyday conversation. They do so to appear approachable and skilled. As a negotiator, when you assess someone’s possible deceit, what signs do you look for in their body language? Are there other nonverbal signals that you spot that give clues to someone’s degree of truthfulness?

When a person lies, their body emits clues. That’s because our body attempts to stay in a constant state of comfort. And, when it’s out of that state, the body displays signals that account for that lack of wellbeing. The following guidelines will assist you in spotting lies in those that attempt to deceive you. Having this information will allow you to heighten your senses when someone is lying.

 

Reading Body Language

  • Facial Reading
    • Forehead – When someone’s forehead begins to sweat, take note of what preceded that action. While the person may be sweating due to the heat, observe to what degree the sweating continues based on questions posed in the conversation. When coupled with other signs, you’ll have better insight into the person’s deceit or truthfulness.
    • Eyes – In some situations, a lier will avoid eye contact, because they know a lack of eye contact may indicate someone’s lying. And others will maintain eye contact longer than usual. To decern when someone may be lying, observe what’s regular eye contact for that person in different situations. As an example, note their eye movement when they’re calm compared to when they feel threatened in an attempt not to disclose the truth. Even when you first meet someone, within moments of the encounter, you can gauge their altering of eye movement. Note what may have caused it to occur.
    • Mouth – When people lie, and they believe someone may be spotting it, the more they speak, the drier their mouth may become. They may begin to lick their lips to offset the dryness or start to swallow excessively. Pay special attention to this act. While nerves may have a role in their actions, guilt from telling lies may be the real source.
    • Ears – Someone fondling their ears may be indicating that they can’t hear what you’re saying. But constant fondling is usually a sign that they’re attempting to comfort themselves. While they may be nervous, note some of the other signals to assess if there’s more to their fondling.

 

  • Body Reading
    • Neck – Rubbing the neck more than usual is another sign of tension, which may be caused by someone lying. Once again, observe other signals mentioned to gain greater insight into what this clue me be giving you.
    • Hands – Some people cover their mouth with their hand when lying. They’re attempting to hold back their words. If someone makes large gestures with their hands and then begin to make smaller ones while displaying some of the other signals noted, that might be another clue that they’re attempting to shield the lie that they want you to believe is the truth.
    • Fists – Hands that become fists indicate potential hostile actions to follow. That gesture in a tense situation may mean the person is tired of your inquisition. He may be experiencing anxiety from thinking you’re aware of his deceitful pronouncements.
    • Feet – When someone suspects that you’re aware of his lying, he may shift his body and point his feet towards the nearest exit. That gesture indicates that he wants to get out of the current environment because he feels uncomfortable.

 

Conclusion 

As you watch someone’s body language, look for a cluster of actions. No action standing alone can definitively denote their truthfulness. Remember, when someone lies, their body emits signals. Those signals may be fleeting. But, if you’re astute at recognizing them, you’ll be better at catching the lies that people tell. That will allow you to maintain greater control in all of your environments … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiation examples #Negotiation strategies #negotiation process #negotiation skills training #negotiation types #negotiation psychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

 

 

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“How To Negotiate Better By Knowing What Value Is” Negotiation Tip of the Week

“To understand someone better, understand what they value. Then, seek to understand why they have those values.” – Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

 

Click here to get the book!

“How To Negotiate Better By Knowing What Value Is”

 

What do you know about value?

“… I’m so sorry for your inconvenience. I can upgrade you to a better room.” Those were the words spoken by a front desk person at a 5-star hotel. He was informing a guest of what he could do as the result of the patron experiencing a restless night. The patron’s restlessness was due to his loud neighbors in other rooms on the floor. The patron had begun calling the front desk around 12-midnight to complain. Throughout the night, he called several more times – all to no avail to squelch the noise that prevented him from sleeping. He thought to himself, and this yammering is ceaseless.

When he checked out of the hotel the next morning, he told the desk manager of his experience. The manager extended apologies on behalf of the hotel, stated that the night’s stay would be removed from the guest’s bill and asked if there was anything else that he could do. The patron said no. I appreciate the gestures you’ve made. Then he said, “all I wanted was a good night’s sleep. I have an important meeting today. And I just wanted to be fresh and well-rested.” As he left the hotel, he wondered if he’d ever stay at that location again.

Do you see the difference between how the front desk person and the desk manager addressed the situation? It’s slight. But it’s also powerful. The desk manager extended apologies, and he asked the guest if there was anything else that he could do. He was seeking the guest’s perspective of value. In other words, he wanted to know what was essential to the guest. If you don’t know what someone values, you don’t know what to offer them. That means you’re making blind offers when doing so in a negotiation.

When you negotiate, there are five factors to keep in mind about value.

  1. People have a different perspective on what they value and why. Once you know their value perspective, seek to understand it.

 

  1. Don’t assume because someone is like you that they’ll like you. Even when people have similar values, there will be nuances that separate their opinions about value. To assume you share exact ideals as your negotiation counterpart can lead to offers and counteroffers that are not valued. In a worst-case scenario, such offers can be damaging to your negotiation efforts.

 

  1. When you’re unsure of a person’s value, ask what they’d least like to lose. The reply will indicate what is of most importance.

 

  1. To test someone about their value, ask, “if there’s one thing that I could grant you in this negotiation, what would it be?” Once again, that person’s value proposition will reside in their response.

 

  1. This last suggestion may fall into the red herring category. It entails discovering something you possess that’s of great value to the other negotiator. Entice that person to believe that he can acquire it but at a very high cost. The higher he’s willing to pay for the acquisition, the higher the value of possessing it will be. Be cautious when engaging this means of acquiring someone’s value perspective. If you don’t allow them to receive it after getting them to make substantial offers, they could become unwilling to grant you much after that. Then, the negotiation might hit a roadblock.

 

To become a better negotiator, you must always understand what is of value to your negotiation counterpart. Once you do, making better offers will be more comfortable – because you’ll know which offers possess the highest value … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Value #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiation examples #Negotiation strategies #negotiation process #negotiation skills training #negotiation types #negotiation psychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

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“Is Your logic Killing The Best of Your Argument” -Negotiation Insight

 

“To be successful, know when to use logic or illogic. Either can kill or enhance an argument.” – Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

 

Click here to get the book!

“Is Your logic Killing The Best of Your Argument”

How do you shape your logic before presenting an argument or rebuttal? And, would it be different if you were a whistleblower?

“The whistleblower doesn’t know what happened. He got his information from other sources.” Those were the words reportedly that came from officials at the White House. The words were stated to discredit the whistleblower. In reality, his account appears to be very accurate. And his report was laid out in a very logical format.

 

When presenting information, consider the following seven suggestions.

 

  1. Make your arguments easy to embrace and understand. The more comfortable someone is in adopting a rebuttal, the more likely it is to persuade them.

 

  1. Solicit empathy – When positioning a response to a question, attempt to place it as the other person would. That’ll allow that person to see herself in your response. It’ll also make it more difficult for her to refute it because she would have engaged in the same manner as you.

 

  1. Before exposing your logic, think of where it might lead and how you might defend your position.

 

  1. To make responses more potent, don’t defuse them. Adding unrelated or challenging to grasp information might defuse your position. Adding too many arguments can lead to a lack of understanding of your primary point. Thus, someone may become confused as the result of focusing on another aspect you’ve mentioned and giving that point more attention.

 

  1. Demeanor – The persona you cast is how people will perceive you. Thus, if you threw the image of someone that’s challenging to deal with, you shouldn’t be surprised when someone deals with you in that manner. Conversely, if you position yourself as someone amenable, they’ll tend to respond to you in that manner. There’s always value in positioning yourself to meet the outcome you seek. Know what that is before projecting your persona, and you’ll have a better chance of convincing others to view situations from your perspective.

 

  1. Don’t appear guilty when refuting a claim that’s logged against you. There are times when how you say something is more important than what you say. That’s because people will perceive your words through the body language gestures you emit while speaking. Therefore, if your words and body language are misaligned, and your nonverbal behavior sends signals of guilt, those will be the overriding indicators that are received. Thus, you’ll become viewed as being more guilty than innocent.

 

  1. Acting crazy – “Crazy is as crazy does.” That’s a cliché denoting how some can feign craziness and use it to advantage their position. They’ll be times when it’s appropriate to act crazy. Doing so will ward off some people that might attack you. And others will keep their distance because they’re not sure how you’ll behave or respond in situations. Thus, this can be a very potent tool to use in certain circumstances. Those environments might occur when you don’t want to appear predictable, or when you want your opponent to stay on guard. That diversion can keep his attention focused on other activities.

 

What does this have to do with negotiations?

 

Every negotiation follows a logical flow. Even when it appears to be illogical, there’s a flow that will become logical. Hence, the better your logic is for what you want to occur during a negotiation, taking into consideration of the other negotiator’s reactions, the greater control you’ll have in that process. That should allow you to control the talks, which in turn should lead to a higher negotiation outcome for you … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Argument #Whistleblower #Logic #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiation examples #Negotiation strategies #negotiation process #negotiation skills training #negotiation types #negotiation psychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

 

 

Categories
Leadership Marketing Personal Development Sales

Warning! A Good Interview Does Not Always Mean a Good Fit!

Let’s get real for a moment.

This is kind of hard to say, but it is something you really need to know, so let’s just rip the band-aid off quickly and get this over with: you may not be as good at spotting a winner during an interview as you think. There. We said it.

You see, many sales managers pride themselves on being able to pick out the best candidates based on their interviewing skills. Sadly, studies have consistently shown that when it comes to picking the best, there is a very low correlation (less than 25%) between a good interview and actual job performance.

Ouch.

And even if you are an exceptionally good interviewer, even the best interviewers can’t make an informed decision if the information received about the candidate was incomplete, irrelevant, or simply didn’t representative of their capabilities and ambitions. Much of which can be traced back to poorly worded job descriptions or less than ideal mandatory interview questions.

The hard truth is that no matter how impressed you were, the candidate you felt was a sure-fire go-getter, may fall flat once the paperwork is done. So much so that you might have been better off with a completely blind selection process. In large part, this is because as much as we would like to believe that we can’t be fooled, we all have inclinations and ideas that make us susceptible to hiring people based on our own personal preferences and internal biases.

OOPS.

 

For example, you may be very impressed with a candidate that attended your alma mater, or one that has a background or interests like yours. While that may make for interesting conversations, it does not mean that they will be top performers in the field. A candidate can also be extremely polished and present themselves flawlessly yet have no real intention of staying with your team long enough to make an impact. Others, who may be nervous or otherwise having a bad day, may actually have highly useable skill sets that never come to light because they did not click the way a less qualified candidate did.

Focus on Performance

 

It is not that interviews are not important; we think they are, but they are only a piece of a larger puzzle. After all, an impressive interview can tell you if the candidate is poised, quick on their feet, and a lot about their overall personality. Interviews however never really give you the entire story, which is why you should consider them as only a part of your hiring strategy. Interviews aside, the best indicators of job performance may lie within other areas, such as those that focus more on skillsets, rather than pedigrees.

A Lesson from The Voice

 

NBC’s popular television show The Voice, illustrates this point well. On the show, celebrity judges must face away from contestants during the initial selection process. This allows the judges to listen intently to the way a given contestant sounds, instead of being distracted by their overall appearance, or other factors. In the same way, when you are evaluating which candidate will become part of your team, you need to focus on the underlying talent, just as much as how well you like them during an interview.

One of the best ways to do this is to require relevant pre-employment skills testing. These should include personality and behavioral tests, as well as sales skills tests. The right testing combined with proper vetting and targeted interviews can go a long way towards placing the right candidate in the right sales role.

By using a thoughtful multi-step process, you can better weed out poor performers, before you hire them, saving you headaches down the road. It also allows you to fill your team with sales representatives that have what it takes to meet sales goals month after month.

Categories
Management Marketing Negotiations Operations Sales Skills Women In Business

“Are You Better Or Worse Under A Pressure Deadline” – Negotiation Insight

 

“Pressure stems from how it’s perceived. To alter it, alter your perspective.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

 

 

Click here to get the book!

“Are You Better Or Worse Under A Pressure Deadline”

I’ll ask you a question in a moment. It’s one that you should have a ready answer. Don’t analyze your response before stating it – answer it in your mind as soon as you read it. The question is, are you better or worse under a pressured deadline?

What was your first answer? Did you think of one before that? Okay. The last question was a trick. Because I asked about your first answer, therefore, there should not have been one before it. But sometimes, when you’re under pressure, you don’t think logically. And, in some cases, you don’t realize that you’re outside the boundaries of reasoning. That can lead to adverse outcomes.

Now that you’re more aware of the thought process you engaged in, analyze the first question I asked again. Are you better or worse under a pressured deadline? Do you have a different answer this time? If so, what caused you to change it? If it’s the same, what did you consider in not changing it? Even if you didn’t alter your response, what were some of your additional thoughts?

You should always be aware of how you perform under pressure and the circumstances that affect your performance. Stress impacts your thought process, which affects your performance. And deadlines impact pressure.

The following are ways that you can perform better under the pressure of deadlines and enhance your performance.

 

Psychology of Deadlines:

Mindset – Be keenly aware of how you act and react under pressure. You should be mindful of how different forms of stress impact your mind and performance too. If you’re aware of that, you’ll be better prepared to address the challenges that will confront you. Even when some of them appear in the form of surprises.

Self-actualization – There will be times when your actions are motivated by a drive to prove to yourself that you can achieve a goal. Even if you’re aware that you have other items with higher priorities, you may elevate a less critical task above them. Then, as the deadline approaches, to complete the other tasks, you find pressure building. And you like it!

The point to remember about self-actualization is, you have to balance it. Weigh it against the importance of addressing real priorities versus those you make up to challenge yourself. While there’s nothing wrong with challenging yourself, do it when it serves you best. Don’t create unnecessary stress for yourself.

Competition – In some environments, you’re more competitive than in others. Know what motivates you to become more competitive in specific situations. And determine what position you’ll play in that competitive game.

Here’s the point. Others can create stress in you but only if you allow them. So, if you determine how you’ll react in environments where someone attempts to motivate you by pitting others against one another, you can choose to participate or not. You’re the one in control of your thoughts, your mind, and your actions. So, control yourself.

 

What does this have to do with negotiations?

 

Deadlines are constant tools that negotiators attempt to employ in a negotiation. They do so because it stimulates pressure. And, good negotiators are aware that people respond differently to pressure. Thus, a good negotiator knows how to exact action by exciting pressure points. She does so based on the activities she wants her opponent to enact.

If you want to become a more efficient negotiator, always consider how you’ll use deadlines to induce pressure. And how you’ll use that as a tool to nudge the other negotiator in one direction versus another. Having a well thought out plan to implement, what could prove to be a decisive instrument, will allow you to control a negotiation better. Having that ability will enable you to have more favorable negotiation outcomes … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

#Pressure #Deadlines #Negotiate #Negotiation #Negotiator #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #Success

 

Categories
Entrepreneurship Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills

Seven Sales Person Cop-Outs

I’ve been helping salespeople and sales leaders become better at their craft for a while.  I’ve seen greatness and, well, less great.  Here are some of the all-time worst things I’ve heard salespeople tell themselves or their managers, actually thinking they were doing well.  (I’m not including anything I’ve heard from salespeople who knew better and were just trying to get away with something.  That’s a whole different set of lessons).

It’s the Company’s Job to Make a Profit at the Price I Sold

Far too many sales forces are divorced from the responsibility of business: to make a profit. This happens regularly in companies compensated only on revenue, not on margins. I don’t care if “it’s hard to measure profit on a given deal because of internal transfer prices” or any other excuse.  If a sales force isn’t compensated on profit, they focus on easy-to-win revenue.

When this is carried to an extreme, sales people feel entitled to sell at discounts…even insane discounts.  I actually heard this from a guy who claimed to be a sales consultant.  I hope his clients survived.

Here’s what sales leaders should coach instead. You need to have conversations about customer value…with customers.  This shouldn’t stop with selling value.  It should carry through toward monetizing value with the customer. Then, pricing – even premium pricing – becomes a comfortable afterthought.  High pricing becomes a bargain.

Great salespeople can sell high volume and high margins.  I know. I’ve seen it. In the mirror.

But I TOLD Him/Her ____

Sales is not one of those jobs where you can get away with simply “telling”, making your listener responsible for understanding what you meant.  Those jobs exist in departments like accounting (and such poor communicators seldom rise to middle management).

The commission for “I did my job, but the customer misunderstood” is zero.  Salespeople are responsible for the picture that forms in the other guy’s head.

Value exists only in a customer’s mind.  If a salesperson simply barfs some “value messaging” they were given by marketing…without having a conversation to confirm that value formed between a prospect’s ears, they are a teller, not a seller.  If that seller doesn’t also confirm how much value formed, they may be the person who thinks “it’s the company’s responsibility to make a profit at the price I sold”.

Our Value is [insert feature here]

The most critical question a sales coach can ask is “what’s our value in this situation?” In fact, if that’s the only question a coach asks, they can learn a lot about how sellers are selling. When sellers have great answers for this question, they probably did everything your methodology teaches them to do. If answers don’t articulate an understanding of customer value, it doesn’t matter how many methodologies they performed; the sale is still in trouble.

When salespeople answer “what’s our value” with a feature or a seller capability, they don’t understand the value. Customers buy outcomes, not products or services. Value forms in the customer’s mind around those outcomes, not your shiny features or stunning capabilities.

Sales coaches who allow value to be described in terms of a seller features or capabilities are failing their salespeople. Value is the desirability of an outcome (hopefully measured in dollars or something just as measurable).  Accept no substitutes.

Customers Don’t Buy Your Product, They Buy You.

Slavery is illegal.  Customers can’t buy you.  As I said above, customers buy outcomes.

This old saying has merit but is meant to communicate how important the seller-customer relationship is.  Specifically, the critical aspect of “relationship” is credibility.  Personal affinity (knowing birthdays, hobbies, expending entertainment budget, etc.) is useful for some buyer-seller relationships, but not for many.

Credibility, though, is foundational to every successful customer relationship.  When a customer is considering some purchase to obtain an outcome, they always consider execution risk. That is, they estimate how likely it is that the purchase will actually result in the desired outcome.  Salesperson credibility forms the foundation of that assessment.  Without credibility, very little buying will actually happen.

Yes, they buy as a result of your credibility while connecting their desired outcome to a purchase, but…they’re buying the outcome.  Always.

Purchasing Says They Like Our ____ Better, but We Have to Meet the Competitor’s Price

I know a number of purchasing people, and they all confirm this truth:

Modern purchasing/procurement professionals are chartered with buying the best total value.

These same purchasing people confirm this truth as well:

Modern purchasing/procurement professionals are not chartered, trained, paid, or given enough time to proactively uncover and evaluate total value.

So…whose job is it to assemble a value picture for them?  That’s right.   A seller’s.  Professionalism and bedside manner counts. Credibility counts even more.  Enlisting the evaluations of experts within the buying organization to validate the value story is often part of the game.

If a seller doesn’t assemble a validated value picture, value doesn’t form in a purchasing person’s mind, and guess what they use to break the tie? Yep. Price.  They like ___ better means they do indeed like it better, but nobody helped monetize that for them…and they aren’t chartered, trained, paid, or have time to do it themselves.

Purchasing Owns the Budget

Purchasing really owns the budget for supplies and equipment used in the purchasing department.  Period.  Salespeople who are led to believe purchasing owns a budget are incorrect.  Sales coaches who let them work under this misconception are damaging careers and losing sales.

Whenever purchasing makes you believe they own the budget, it’s because they believe your offer has no differentiated value. In their minds, there is no need to bother people inside the company with a nonexistent value proposition.  In fairness to purchasing, letting a seller of a non-differentiated product/service shouldn’t happen.  Undue influence, like “whiskey and tickets” shouldn’t shape a commodity purchasing decision.  If your offer’s only differentiation is courtside seats, that shouldn’t be allowed to shape a decision.

As your offer’s differentiation diminishes vs. the next viable choice, the need to analyze value diminishes, and the entire buying organization feels safe in delegating the buying decision to purchasing. Purchasing doesn’t technically own the budget in these cases, but the organization gives de facto authority to purchasing. This only happens, though, when sellers create no value in the customer’s mind. These are the kind of sales environment that is about to be conducted by bots, AI, etc.

I’m Talking to All of the Right People

Complex B2B sales methodologies help sales professionals organize their selling efforts among a multi-person buying ecosystem.  While they’re handy for organizing an approach to an identified set of people, they aren’t that great at identifying all of the appropriate parties.  Most simply tell you “identify everyone, then use our tool”.

When somebody at a customer tells your salesperson the set of people they’ve engaged internally, how does a salesperson – or their coach — know that list wasn’t kept short in order to make somebody’s job easier?  Should you expect anyone at your customer to know how all of your capabilities translate to outcomes throughout their company?

Here’s the reality:  companies silo themselves more narrowly every year. Silos become sub-specialties, then sub-sub-silos, then soda straws. Only one soda straw has budget to buy your offer, but many benefit.  As customer subdivide, more soda straws benefit.  People in your budget-holding soda straw have three things working against them: 1) they no longer have a big-picture view of their own company 2) engaging all the people they really should make decision complexity awful and dysfunctional simply from a committee size standpoint 3) nobody at the buying company has your sellers’ expertise in the domain of possible outcomes.

If your selling organization hasn’t built the business acumen to help customers navigate these challenges, it won’t happen. Customers aren’t equipped – and shouldn’t be.  That’s your job.

Summing Up

I hope you didn’t find any of these hitting home.  If you did, though.  I’m here to talk.  Contact me if you’d like to stop hearing these statements in your sales organization.

To your success!