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“You Are Not Worthy Of Being Here Promotes Defiance” – Negotiation Insight

“Your imagination promotes future value. When considering value, consider the values of others.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click here to Tweet)

Click here to get the book!

“You Are Not Worthy Of Being Here Promotes Defiance”

 

You tell me I don’t belong here. When your first forefathers arrived, others told them they didn’t belong. Those in authority dismissed them as being “less than.” And that invoked their defiance. Thus, they fought for the right to be recognized as being worthy of belonging and being accepted. So why do you state through your words and deeds that I don’t belong here? Like your forefathers, I and those like me will fight you for what we see as our right to be accepted – our rights to share and partake of the bounty in this land we call home.

If you suppress me, that will only provoke defiance in me. And one day, I’ll rise against you. If you choke the life out of me, I will die. But eventually, those like me, that like me, will fight you. They will exact my vengeance against you and those like you.

Eventually, you and others will hear my voice – even if you attempt to silence me. Because everything changes and the turnarounds that brought you into power will someday sweep that power away from you. So, the question you might ask yourself is, how do you wish to be treated when you’re the one hearing, you don’t belong here.

Those were words offered as a response by someone that was subjugated by the powers to be. Continue reading to discover how you can avert the travails of suppression and avert traveling on a road that could lead to despair.

 

Whether it’s a phrase like “you people,” “you don’t belong in this neighborhood,” or “go back where you came from,” such phrases can serve as triggers that incite resistance. And those that use such verbiage should be mindful of the powderkeg they may ignite. Because such verbiage can rile others to resist the powers to be, and lead to a revolt. And revolutions bring about a form of change that those in power find it difficult to control and accept.

 

Mindset:

  • Authority’s view – We have the power. Others must obey us. That’s the mindset that some with supremacy possess and display when addressing those that they view as not being at their level or beneath them. It’s a mindset that seeks confrontation because when challenged, it must be defended to sustain itself. And it’s vulnerable because the slightest perceived provocation can set it into a defensive posture. That defensive posture may cause others to become defensive. Then, the mindset of everyone becomes encased in a state of protectiveness, which reduces the possibility of averting a crisis or improving a situation.

 

  • Minority’s view – People that have been badly treated in the past by those in authority are sometimes overly sensitive. And their perspective becomes self-affirming when they focus on the wrongful deeds thrust on those of their kind in the past. Thus, a particular phrase, a perceived provocative look, or someone thought to have authority walking too close to them while they shop “can set them off.” Why? Because triggers occur within them. Triggers that bring to mind past infractions that evoke the feeling of being perceived as less than worthy of being or doing what they’re undertaking currently. And the result is, they feel the need to confront the perpetrator – they feel the need to defend themselves for not only the current aggression but for those that have occurred in the past. They’re pushing back on the accumulation of past grievances to amend perceived wrong that has lasted too long. If you’re someone that cuddles such thoughts, be aware of them. That impacts the way you see and interact with others. Also, be mindful that everyone that appears to be an authority figure is not out to torment you.

 

Fear vs. Openmind:

In most cases, when people oppose one another, apprehension exists. Instead of fighting those that you see as not being like you, embrace them, their views, and their opinions. Do so by exploring the question, what are you afraid of, and why do you fear it? Even if you eventually dismiss someone’s premise, doing so will strengthen, not weaken you. Being openminded may create a paradigm shift that sheds a different perspective on how to interact with those you view as foes. You will have expanded your thought process, which only leads to better decision making.

 

Reflection:

Consider all the people that loved us into being here. Those were the generations that preceded us. Their views and thoughts still influence the way we think – even though they may have departed us decades or centuries ago.

When you ignore the thoughts, perspectives, and opinions of others, you may forgo a more significant value that such might have added to the benefit of society. As long as people look at others as being ‘less than,’ everyone’s environment and opportunities will be less than they could have been. To prevent that, be more open to accepting those that don’t share your views. Be more willing to embrace the opinions of those that have ideas that differ from yours. And keep an open mind about being openminded. In so doing, you’ll see a broader spectrum of the positive things that could be versus that which might threaten you. If you let that open-mindedness serve as your catalyst to a better tomorrow, better tomorrow’s will await you … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Defiance #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiationexamples #Negotiationstrategies #negotiationprocess #negotiationskillstraining #negotiationtypes #negotiationpsychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #TheMasterNegotiator #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

 

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Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“Negotiator – Motivating People Can Be Easy – Just Give Them Hope“ – Negotiation Tip of the Week

Motivating people is easy. Just infuse them with hope, and give them the tools to believe in themselves. Then, provide support by showing them how to use those tools. -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

“Negotiator – Motivating People Can Be Easy – Just Give Them Hope“ – Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

When implementing policy, strategy, or procedures that you want people to adopt, you must motivate them. You can accomplish that by giving them hope that your request is in their best interest. If you don’t, or they don’t see value in following your proposition, motivating them will be daunting, if at all possible. Embrace the following insights to get others to support your requests, and they will be quicker to accept the actions you set for them.

 

Mindfulness:

Be mindful of how you’re attired, your mannerisms, and the words you use when speaking. Because others will make assumptions about you and your motives based on the subliminal messages they receive. And that will impact the willingness they extend for you to lead them or avert your directives. To that end, understand what’s proper for the environment you’re in and comport yourself appropriately.

 

Awareness:

Unless you expect the unexpected, you’ll never observe it. Therefore, be keenly aware of those that plot in secret. Because they work in darkness for a purpose. And more than likely, that purpose won’t serve you.

 

Decorum:

During interactions with adversaries or those aligned with you, be aware of the silent signals you send via your body language. Your slightest grimace at an inopportune moment will momentarily flash your disdain about a subject’s discussion. And that can sway someone’s perception of your likeability. If the likeability factor is missing or contrary, you’ll have a harder time trying to convince someone to follow you.

Even if someone assails your position, keep your cool. That is, keep it unless you’re in an environment where such a slight is expected to be met by a stern rebuttal or some other action that allows others to think, I would have done the same thing. Your task is to make others see themselves in you and your position. That will be the allure that attracts them to bond with you.

 

Replicate Online And Offline Platforms:

Have you observed how social media platforms get people to engage with others? They do so by letting you know when others have tagged you in a post, picture, or article. Thus, the more people involved in a thread of information, the more nudges you’ll receive about the thoughts and comments of others that may include you. That procedure impacts your curiosity. Natural inquisitiveness will heighten the desire in most people to investigate what someone has stated about them. Because they want to know what others are saying – especially if it may be salacious.

You can use the same process to move people to embrace your ideas and direction. To do that, filter the information that others see by feeding them the positive statements that others are making about your position. The more positive comments people see, the more swayed they’ll become to accept your view. In social media, you can use the platform that’s easiest to control. But social media is not your only controlling point to consider.

You can use any platform to manage your message. Thus, it doesn’t have to be social media. It can be something as simple as posting flyers in prominent places that depicts positive sentiments about your position. All you have to do is have control over the process and what people see. That will influence the way they think.

 

Digital Trace:

There’s a plethora of digital information that awaits your uncovering. And if you uncover savory nuggets, that’s another way to shift the perspective that others have of your adversary. If you choose to use such information to advantage your position, before doing so, make sure that information will move your opponents’ supporters. And remember that a smart foe will attempt to gather information about you from digital trace information too. So, keep yourself away from controversy today that might negatively impact someone’s perception of your character tomorrow.

 

Getting People To Follow Your Request:

There are three psychological factors that you must activate when coaxing others to accept your directives. If these forces are not employed, your subjects will be less likely to embrace your offerings.

Deep Psychology:

  1. Motivation – The person must want to perform the behavior.
  2. Ability – The person perceives themselves to have the ability to address your request and view it as not being difficult to do.
  3. Trigger – You must give a call to action and remind them to address the behavior you wish them to embrace.

To be effective, you must use the three actions mentioned, motivation, ability, and trigger in the same request. The formula is, behavior, equals motivation, plus ability, plus a trigger. Therein will lie how you can use psychological motivators to entice more people to embrace your requests or demands.

 

Using Other People’s Words:

To enhance your position, consider using the words of others about the direction you wish people to adopt. You can couch those words from a positive or negative perspective. As an example, if you want people to move closer to your position, cite the words an influencer used to talk about a stance that’s similar to yours. If seeking to decrease the probability of people challenging your opinion, recite the words of doom that a prominent figure made. In either case, you can strengthen your point by using third-party sentiments. Thus, ponder this, and other tactics you can employ, that’ll influence the thoughts of those you wish to impact.

 

Reflection:

When people speak, a silent rider accompanies their words, which conveys hidden information about their inner thoughts. And those silent signals can undermine the intent their words were meant to report. Hence, what someone says can be perceived to have different meanings based on the words they use, and their mannerisms. And that impacts the perception that others have of them.

Always keep the insights mentioned in mind. By doing so, you’ll be better positioned to entice people to follow, embrace, and accept your leadership and directions … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

#People #Hope #Bodylanguage #readingbodylanguage #Negotiations #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiation examples #Negotiation strategies #negotiation process #negotiation skills training #negotiation types #negotiation psychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

 

 

 

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Entrepreneurship Management Negotiations Operations Sales Skills Women In Business

“Don’t Joust When You Want To Project Powerful Trust“ – Negotiation Insight

“Trust is like a shimmering light. It appears one moment and gone the next. To keep it illuminated longer, limit those that would keep you in the dark.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click here to Tweet)

Click here to get the book!

“Don’t Joust When You Want To Project Powerful Trust“ – Negotiation Insight

“Trust is like a shimmering light. It appears one moment and gone the next. To keep it illuminated longer, limit those that would keep you in the dark.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click here to Tweet)

Click here to get the book!

“Don’t Joust When You Want To Project Powerful Trust“

How do you know they’ll trust us? I don’t know. But, if they sense we’re willing to follow their lead, not joust with them, and project an open, honest, and powerful desire for them to trust us, I believe they will. So were the words exchanged between two members of a team that desperately wanted their counterparts to trust them. They needed to be trusted because, without it, the chances of a successful outcome would become significantly diminished.

When engaging people, trust plays a pivotal role in the outcome. And, since that leads to faith, which impacts confidence, which affects expectations, the degree you’re trusted determines how far they’ll follow your requests and mandates. Without that, you risk standing on the proverbial desert of isolation, waiting for an oasis that most likely will never occur.

As you reach to others to enhance your efforts, consider the following factors to heighten the probability that they’ll work with you.

Degrees of Trust:

The characteristics and background of the people you attempt to control will determine the amount of trust they’ll grant you. If they come from non-trusting environments or have had poor relationships with authorities in the past, more time and effort will be required to solicit their trust. On the other hand, if you have a reputation of someone that others have trusted in the past, less effort will be required. And therein lies your measurement as to the effort you’ll spend in obtaining the trust needed to get others to believe and accept what you request of them.

Reasons For Broken Trust:

Entities having cross purposes can be one reason trust is not established or broken. There can be a host of other reasons too. To enhance your efforts, think about the following ideas that might impact the trust factor in your efforts to implant a plan or to get others to bond and embrace your directions.

  • Combativeness – Some people shrink when put in combative environments – they can become absorbed and consumed by it. And yet others will thrive in such situations. You should know the setting that’s best suited to motivate those you deal with based on your surroundings. In some circumstances, you can heighten someone’s abilities for a short time by placing them in stressful situations. At other times they may wither. Always be mindful of the position you put people in and how long you keep them in it.
  • Subjugation – Everyone is not a leader. Thus, some people are more comfortable being followers. Knowing the mental makeup of your allies and those that combat your efforts should be the cornerstone of any plan you create. Incorporating this insight into any strategy you devise allows you to assess and determine how you might manipulate the powers to be. That will enable you to enhance your efforts and erode the forces that oppose you.
  • Hard/Soft hand – History has taught us that force is required to overwhelm a relentless foe. And history has also shown that rebellions can occur when power reigns too heavy-handedly to suppress the desires of the less fortunate. Therefore, when you have authority or supremacy, you should be careful about how you use it.

If others view your edicts as being too harsh, you can entice inner resurrection amongst those that prowl to subvert your efforts. If your approach is considered too soft, you can appear weak or noncommittal for the outcome you’re chasing. Like most things in life, striking the right balance between being too hard or soft is the position you should pursue. That’s the sweet spot that will enable the possibility of you achieving the best outcome.

Fitting The Pieces Together:

Control Jousters – In every environment, people jockey for power. And the factions that stem from those activities can weaken your position and drastically impede your progress – especially if you need a united alliance. So, be mindful of underlings that seek power for their self-aggrandizement. Do this within your forces and your opponent’s ranks too.

Some individuals may want clout to feed their ego, while others may wish it so that others don’t view them as a bottom-feeder. In either case, you can use such forces as leverage to enhance your efforts, or thwart those of your adversaries. In the latter instance, incite those in the opposer’s camp to vie for power, which will pit them against one another. While they’re confronting inner chaos, use their fray to weaken their most robust components by enticing other factions of there’s to align with you. Be careful how you employ this ploy within your ranks. If done ineffectively, you may incite an uprising in your midst.

Reflection:

Anyone can be king-for-a-day. But if you want to be a leader that others will eagerly follow, you must project a powerful trust factor. Doing that will enhance your persona. It will silently state that you’re someone that has influence and someone worthy of leading others. Without those factors, others may follow your lead for a short time, but you’ll have challengers that’ll quest to supplant your leadership. Heavy will be the head that wears the crown. And that head will be yours.

So, inspire others by showing them that you’re a reckoning force. That force can be to their advantage or their detriment. Hence, display firmness when required and at other times, be lenient. Regardless, in the end, to get others to abide by your wishes, adopt the demeanor that’ll move them the most. The one constant factor in that is trust. Use it wisely … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#trust #joust #project #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiationexamples #Negotiationstrategies #negotiationprocess #negotiationskillstraining #negotiationtypes #negotiationpsychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #TheMasterNegotiator #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

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Management Negotiations Operations Sales Skills Women In Business

“Negotiator – How To Overcome Non-Compliance For Better Improvement” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“To feed improvement, starve non-compliance.” – Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

Click here to get the book

 

 

“Negotiator – How To Overcome Non-Compliance For Better Improvement”

Well, I guess that’s it – we lost. No, we didn’t, was the reply. Our opponents offered us a quid pro quo. And I don’t believe half of the folks negotiating knew what the heck that meant. We don’t have to comply with the outcome. And if we don’t, the only thing they can do is reopen the negotiation for our non-compliance. That was an exchange that occurred between two people that were on the short end of what they’d just branded as the initial phase of a negotiation. They were tough negotiators that sought the improvement of their plight. The strategy they’d just chose was to ignore the agreement they’d just made. Instead of abiding, they’d find a reason to ignore it.

I’m sure you can recall a time when you thought you had everything on the right track. It may have been at the end of a negotiation, or any interaction you had with someone. Everyone agreed to abide in a specific manner. Later, you discovered, that was the last thing the other party intended to do.

 

Here’s how you can handle non-compliance in the future.

 

Perspective:

First, be aware of the other party’s perception of an outcome. If they don’t believe they received a good deal, they may attempt to renege on it. Also, remember, someone’s perception is their reality. That means, you can think it’s a good deal from their vantage point, but unless they do, it’s not.

 

Seek Leverage:

Look for points of leverage that can be used to thwart the offender’s opinions. That may lie in unsuspecting places (e.g., church, community, business, political, family, social media, etc.). Depending on your ferocity to alter his non-compliance, leave no stone unturned. The more advanced the leverage you can bring to bear, the less effort you’ll have to exert to achieve a better outcome.

 

Seek Allies:

Allies can be a huge source of leverage. But you have to be cautious about how you choose them, and the environments from which they come.  

 

  • Internal – Be aware of the allies you have inside your camp. Members within your environment may have different goals and aspirations. Thus, some may work against you while casting the pretense of being on your side. To reduce the chance of working with subversives inside your camp, work with trusted sources you’ve worked with before.

 

  • Social media – Because you can’t completely control your messaging on social media, this can be a daunting channel to use when attempting to alter the opinions of your adversaries’ supporters. Thus, it’s one reason to exercise caution when placing information in those venues. Nevertheless, you can promote premises that might resonate with some individuals. Do that by placing timely information on appropriate social media outlets. To enhance your efforts, consider the outlet that the oppositions’ supporters retrieve information from when considering this as a possible tool.

 

  • News outlets – Who do you know in the news outlets in your town? If you don’t have any contacts, create some. When you want to get a message to stakeholders that might be used as leverage or for any other advantage, news outlets can be an invaluable resource. Don’t ignore them. And, if you don’t want something disparaging you say to reach others, don’t say it. Even if it’s ‘off the record’, someone may leak your words.

Communications:

 

  • Speak the right language – When communicating and attempting to bond with other parties, speak their language. That means, use the same words and idioms they use. To bond even better, use the same inflections and accents they use too. Mirroring them through speech will create the impression that you and they are similar. And it’s difficult for someone to dislike someone that’s like themselves. Conversely, if you wish to lord over others, use lofty language that signals your prominence over them.

 

  • Keep communications simple – In some cases, it may be better to keep your communications simple. For some information consumers, you should use words that are easy to understand. Don’t speak over their heads by using words that they can’t comprehend. If you do, your communication may become challenging to grasp and understand. If it’s overly challenging, they may perceive you as putting on airs, or worse, misleading.

 

  • Galvanize opponent’s supporters – It may appear contradictory to galvanize your opponent’s supporters. But your efforts to thwart their non-compliance may be enhanced by using an opponent’s supporters against him. Sometimes this can be accomplished by appealing for fairness in an attempt to capture the hearts and minds of those individuals (e.g. how would you like someone doing this to you or those you care for). At other times, you may pursue their support by casting your opponent in a light that is far outside of what’s typical for a situation. Adopting either of these maneuvers, depending on the circumstances, should allow mental movement to occur in the minds of your opponent’s followers. Remember, you’re seeking the hearts and minds of those individuals. If you want either or both, use the appropriate strategy required to acquire the outcome you’re seeking.

Reflection:

Striving to overcome non-compliance can be a daunting task if someone’s actions are allowed to fester into a formidable foe. Therefore, always be watchful of situations going awry. Take action before they hinder you. The quicker you’re able to identify the beginning of a straying position, one that’s departing from an agreement or expected behavior, the faster you can address it. That will be half the battle of confronting those that later contradict their commitment.  You will have uncovered them at the early stages of their betrayal, which will give you more time to reposition yourself and them … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Improvement #Non-Compliance #opposition #Body #language #Bodylanguage #readingbodylanguage #Negotiations #Control #Conversations #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiation examples #Negotiation strategies #negotiation process #negotiation skills training #negotiation types #negotiation psychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

 

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Growth Human Resources Management Negotiations News and Politics Skills Women In Business

“The Hidden Role Politics Plays In The Cover-up” – Negotiation Insight

 

“Some people think cover-ups are a necessity of life; others think they’re not. But when politics is involved, always think of covering yourself, less you be the one that’s covered up.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click here to Tweet)

“The Hidden Role Politics Plays In The Cover-up”

He awoke with a feeling of utter disbelief. He’d done everything right by following the guidelines and keeping his superiors abreast of his actions. They’d given him their buy-in as he moved from one aspect of the operations to the next. Still, when the outcome was not as expected, he was abandoned by those that had given him their assurances of support. Even worse, they threw him under the proverbial bus. He didn’t know it at the time, but politics had played a role in his abandonment. There’d been a cover-up. And his betrayal was done to conceal the nefarious actions of others.

Later, he wondered what happened and mused about being a sacrificial lamb. Upon reflection, he realized that he’d been led to slaughter while others kept him in a state of calm. And that occurred through the reassurance that his superiors and contemporaries gave him that he’d be protected. He concluded that politics had played a hidden role in the decision to cast him as the fall-guy. It placed the blame on him for what others touted as an adverse outcome.

Has anything like that ever happened to you? I’m sure you can recount some issues that you experienced in your life that took a side-turn. Just when you thought everything was on the track of success, something occurred to derail it. It may have been politics’ hidden role that served as the culprit.

When a crisis is brewing, warning signs occur. If you miss those signals, you may be walking down a precarious path fraught with danger that’s waiting for your arrival. To become better insulated from the undesirable underbelly that politics can have in uncertain situations, consider the following as you go forward in life.

 

The Political Game:

Most cover-ups occur due to pressure brought from a superior force. And it’s cast upon those that have limited abilities to confront it. Therefore, when you’re the lesser force in the equation, be vigilant about why an entity might abandon you, due to the pressures forced upon them. Therein will lie one of the safeguards you can use to protect yourself.

When politics are involved, people will align with unimaginable sources to safeguard themselves. Consider the forces you might form to shield yourself too. Just keep in mind that no alliance is permanent. Hence, be aware of when they shift. As they do, that’ll be your cue to reassess the forces against you and the possible time to form new alliances.

Mindfulness:

Be mindful of the role you’re playing in someone’s political game. Consider how disposable you are and what the kingmaker’s goals are. You should also take into mind the type of characteristics he possesses. Ask yourself, is he someone that stands behind his words? What proof has he shown of that in the past? What were some of his most dire situations where he stood up for those he represented? And, if so, when did he abandon them?

You’re seeking a roadmap of his past activities that might indicate how he’ll act and react in future situations. That’s important because you’re going to base your interactions with others in his sphere based on his prior actions. Sometimes, that insight will allow you to become insulated from the drudgeries of the politics that might grip him.

Connections:

Connect with those in power while realizing that their power is fluid – just like it’ll flow to them, then through them, one day, it’ll eventually flow away from them. So, be aware of whom you’ll connect with as power shifts. Also, be translucent when doing so. That means you should be cognizant that there are no permanent friends, no permanent enemies, just permanent interests.

Thus, always consider if you’ll align yourself with the power that’s behind the face of power or those that defy that source. To assess which may be better, determine the path to whom authority is flowing, and the probability of it igniting new leadership. Either way, understand the political game you’re in, and you’ll have a better chance of protecting yourself. Accordingly, you need to choose wisely.

Reflection:

No one is immune from injustices. Because justice herself can be an unfaithful mistress. If you think because you do the right thing, by following the rules and keeping interested parties abreast of your actions, you’ll escape harm, think again. Politics make for strange bedfellows. Always remember, those with substantial influence and power don’t want to lose it. To prevent that from occurring, they may combine forces with the most unsavory characters to maintain their authority. And that can leave you in the lurch.

Consider the thoughts and ideas mentioned earlier when you first sense betrayal or shifting support. Even better, attempt not to place yourself in such a position by always being aware of what’s occurring around you. If you’re never in a place where danger lurks, it will never find you … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

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“How To Resolve Powerful Opposition By Reading Body Language“ – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“Don’t fear opposition. From it, you can become stronger.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

 

 

Click here to get the book

“How To Resolve Powerful Opposition By Reading Body Language“

 

He observed the opposing member’s body language and noted a rise in their opposition. He thought – this intervention is not going well. I’ll display a stronger resolve through my body language when I speak. And that will enhance my words.

Even those not astute at reading body language become swayed by their gestures. Some they see, and others they miss – their subconsciousness may capture the latter. That may lead to someone thinking, ‘I had a hunch or a feeling about that. But I didn’t know what it meant.’ In reality, that was their intuition summoning their consciousness. When one notices the slight gesture of someone biting their lips, hands-on hips, or an intense glare, those gestures convey a message.

You can use the following information about reading body language to resolve opposition to your position.

 

Identify Alliances

Always know who’s aligned with whom before you attempt an intervention. Without that insight, you don’t know who might be your real friend or foe. That’s important because, without that knowledge, you can’t confront the real force that opposes you. Thus, there may be a stronger force with superior powers that go unaddressed. And that could leave you going in circles wondering why you’re not advancing.

To identify possible factions aligned against you, consider planting misinformation about one group in the other. And note what that information does within those units. In particular, observe what the info does per new alliances the opposition forms. You can glean additional insight by visually inspecting the coalitions when you’re in the same environment. Do that by noting who congregates with whom and any other nonverbal exchanges that occur. You’re looking for the slightest of shifts to increase your advantage. If the forces are still committed to one another as before, that might indicate the information was insufficient for its purpose. It could also imply that there’s a stronger alliance than you’d imagined. And an FYI, this tactic is served better if you have a confidant within your targets midst place the information.

While some might consider this maneuver to be underhanded, depending on the threat confronting you, it may be well warranted – even if some revile you. Just be mindful that those with the most to lose will be the ones that contest you the most. Once uncovered, they’ll be the real opponents challenging your position.

 

Understanding One Important Body Language Queue

To identify alliances through body language, observe gestures passed between members of the opposition. Such gestures as one member placing a hand on the shoulder of another while talking can silently indicate that he’s seeking support from that person. You can also observe someone searching for assistance when a person speaks, and someone from his group places a hand on his shoulder. Since the prior gesture can also be a form of control (i.e., let’s not go that far), take note of when it occurs and who initiates the action. If it’s a “let’s not go that far” intent, the person displaying the gesture may be a leader behind the scenes or someone that you can use later to control the person speaking. Using a veiled leader in that capacity would allow you to use the hidden powers of an influencer.

 

Signs of Escalation

Some body language gestures are like canaries in a coal mine – they foretell pending danger.

 

Face-To-Face

You can sense some body language gestures before the display becomes altered. Thus, those displays reflect the emotional state of that individual at that moment. Those signals are called micro-expressions.

There are other signs to observe, such as hand flexing, the hand becoming a fist, displaying a grimacing demeanor while moving closer to you, and increasing the rate of speech. Such indicators can be the signal of emotional elevation, which can lead to hostile escalations.

It’s important to note such signals because they can indicate a change in the mental temperature. And that could put you in a worse position – which can lead you and them to become unreceptive to logical thinking.

 

On Phone

When speaking on the phone, listen for deep sighing, the deliberation of words, and the pace of speech of the person with whom you’re talking. As someone’s ire becomes heightened, you’ll hear the rise of it through those nonverbal queues. Note if you’re displaying such gestures too. Because regardless of who commits those actions, it’s an opportunity for you to shift the conversation in a direction that suits your purpose.

 

Reflection:

You can note the effectiveness of your efforts by the shifting positions your opponents adopt. Note the shift verbally and physically when in person. That’ll indicate their attempts to seek an opening they can exploit. Which means they’re on the defense.

Thus, when intervening in situations, depending on the value of the outcome, do so with vigor – don’t dither. Dithering can waste your time and hamper your position. And that’s something you can’t afford. Use the body language signs mentioned before, during, and after an intervention. They’ll put you in a more powerful position … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

 

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“7 Micro-Expressions You Need To Know – Negotiate Better” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“Reading micro-expressions can help avert crises. But only if your interpretation is accurate.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

 

 

Click here to get the book!

“7 Micro-Expressions You Need To Know – Negotiate Better”

A pale expression held his face. Holy ‘blank’ was the four-letter word obscenity he uttered. We’re in a full-blown crisis! Dumbfounded, he said, what are we going to do now? We have to negotiate with them! His associate said, let’s meet with our adversaries. We can read their micro-expressions during the meeting to gain insight into their real thoughts and feelings. That’ll allow us to know what’s really on their minds.

Do you know how to read micro-expressions? Do you know what they are? Continue reading, and you’ll be able to answer both of those questions. Plus, you’ll discover how you can use them when you’re in a crisis.

 

Micro-expressions:

Micro-expressions are emotional displays that last for less than a quarter of a second. They reflect the reality of someone’s thoughts at that moment. Hence, if you’re able to interpret someone’s emotional displays accurately, you’ll have insight into their current emotional state. Doing that will give you insight into how they feel about an offer or statement. During a crisis, having this insight gives you real-time information about the direction you should take.

There are seven micro-expressions generic to everyone throughout the world

  • Fear – When detecting genuine fear, look for raised eyebrows, widened eyes, and parted lips with the bottom lip protruding downward.
  • Anger – Anger is denoted by lowered eyebrows and flaring nostrils reminiscent of a bull before charging.
  • Disgust – This micro-expression is displayed by the upper lip turned up, while the nose is wrinkled.
  • Surprise – You’ll recognize surprise through raised eyebrows, wide eyes, and open mouth.
  • Contempt – This gesture appears as a sneer. You’ll note it by one corner of the mouth turned upward.
  • Sadness – Note sadness through drooping eyelids and downturned lips. A change in voice inflection and tonality may also accompany genuine sorrow.
  • Happiness – Happiness is shown through wide-eyes with crow’s feet or wrinkles at their corners, a smile, and raised cheeks. A degree of exuberance may also accompany this gesture.

 

Using Micro-expressions In Crisis Intervention

Knowing someone’s real thoughts allows you to understand their source of motivation – and that’s the benefit of being able to read someone’s expressions.

During a crisis, use the unannounced information you’ve gathered and assess how strong the opposition is. From there, determine the degree of mental or real force to summon. Another plus is the ability to evaluate the commitment that those on the opposing side have to one another. Accordingly, if you can identify those with less alliance, you may be able to separate them from the others. Therefore, you’d be weakening their numerical strength, which may assist in decreasing their overall power.

Once you’ve gathered the mentioned insights, consider different ways to use them to your benefit. As an example, you might:

  • create false scenarios to confuse the other party per the direction they should take
  • align some of your stronger positions with their weaker ones (do this to keep their stronger points at bay) – then you can state that you’re trying your best to meet their needs
  • form a splinter group, consisting of those from your side, theirs, and neutral stakeholders to combat the overall strength of the opposing party – this maneuver is akin to divide and conquer, with the benefit of your team becoming stronger, while their’s become diluted.

 

Feigning Micro-expressions

While genuine micro-expressions give insight into one’s mind, you can fake them. As an example, you can exaggerate contempt by turning one corner of your lip up and allowing it to linger longer than a micro-expression. Even if the other person didn’t initially observe your expression, you could ask if he saw what you’d done. Regardless, you’ll have him on the defense by asking questions and him answering them.

 

Confront With Caution

There’s nothing more daunting than sizing up an adversary and not identifying its true leader. That means you must be hyper-aware of who your real opponent is and the decision-making abilities they have. You’ve heard about the power behind the throne. Even more so during a crisis, that’s who you want to confront. Your rivals may have a shared leadership structure or using a front-person as the face of their team. They’d do that to confuse you.

To identify a power source, observe who might look at whom for confirmation before making or accepting an offer. You can also detect subtle signals per the hesitation in committing that act. That’s where your observance of micro-expressions will lend assistance in identifying a person fronting as one possessing power.

 

Reflection

Being able to identify and interpret micro-expressions accurately will give you an enormous advantage in any situation. During a crisis, having this skill will magnify your power exponentially. So, if you use this ability wisely, you’ll deter and avert more crises … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

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“Are Myths About Supremacy Destroying Your Life” – Negotiation Insight

 

“The myth about supremacy is, it is a myth. Because everyone’s insights add value to the whole, even if their insights detract from the thoughts about the superiority of others.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

 

Click here to get the book!

 

“Are Myths About Supremacy Destroying Your Life”

 

Don’t allow the supremacy myth to destroy your unrealized opportunities due to the way you think.

We don’t need their input. We’re superior in every way to them – said one associate to the other. So, they entered into a bargaining session with those they assumed were inferior, and became obliterated! Since they went into the situation with a superior mindset, they’d not considered options that might have improved what became their dismal outcome. They didn’t prepare appropriately per thoughts they should have pondered. And that was to their detriment.

Continue reading, and you’ll gather insights to improve your interactions with other people. Because, even if you don’t define yourself as having myths about others, others have them about you. And since everyone is codependent upon each other, ignoring this illusion can prevent future advancements in thinking for you and them. Without that improvement, everyone will advance at a slower pace.

 

Impact of Thoughts

As someone of authority, have you considered how myths impact your life? If your first thought was, I don’t think others are inferior – you should reconsider your belief. Everyone considers himself above others in some cases. You may view the disheveled homeless person, the ticket-taker on the train or those in other environments to be inferior. The point is, recognize your reality for what it is. From that point, you can begin to deal with your version of the myth. That’s important because that myth might be hampering the advancement of your life based on the way you think.

 

The Problem With Supremacy

Thinking you’re superior to others taints your mind. It affirms misconceptions that you possess that may hamper your interactions with others. And that can place you at a disadvantage when you’re trying to sway someone to adopt your position. Worse, you’ll lose time and attrition on aspects that might have otherwise advanced that position.

Always be aware of what you say about the abilities of others. And be more aware of the inner thoughts you possess about such feelings. Because that’s the message you’ll project in the way you act towards them.

 

Identifying Your Fears

Fear may be driving your beliefs about your supremacy. If so, are you aware of what you fear? The point is, you should examine why you hold such views to be truths if you do. Because you’re alienating yourself from those that you may use as allies in a best-case scenario. In a worst-case scenario, you’re turning them into adversaries.

By identifying your source of motivation, you’ll have a point from which to address your supremacy challenges. That will allow you to shift your mind, which will lead to self-improvement and your positioning with others. That means the more open you are to their viewpoints, even if you don’t initially agree with them, the better your chances will be of understanding their perspective. From there, you’ll become more sensitized, which should place you and them on a better road of consideration, which should lead to better outcomes.

 

Reflection

When you’re in any role, leadership, or non-leadership, you must possess top-of-mind awareness of how you view people. If you consider others to be inferior, you’ll attempt to cast that demeanor upon them. Some will resist, and others will fight you for the insult you toss their way. That can dampen your position and make it more challenging to deal with them.

People see the world differently. That’s due to the experiences and environments they’ve encountered. Therefore, if you wish to improve conditions in a situation, consider availing yourself to the thoughts and opinions of those that don’t come from your background, and those that haven’t shared your experiences. Having their added viewpoint will allow you to see conditions from another perspective. It will also open the spectrum of new opportunities. Those will become the opportunities that will increase the chances of improvement for everyone involved … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

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“Reflection – Negotiation – What Is The Expiration On A Promise” – Negotiation Insight

 

“All promises have expiration dates. Don’t let yours expire without reaping its rewards.” – Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click here to Tweet)

 

 

Click here to get the book!

“Reflection – Negotiation – What Is The Expiration On A Promise”

 

… They needed to increase their perception of power. So, they sought an ally to enhance that perception. They made a promise to support that ally’s efforts from that point into the future.

But when a new leader gained power, he abandoned his ally. The ally, upon reflection, realized they were pawns in their former partner’s game. They’d been betrayed and sold out because they no longer had the value they once possessed. Within their ranks, they asked the question, what is the expiration on a promise?

That question is one that you should ponder about every situation. Things constantly change. And thus, parameters formed in one alliance can alter a promise when people form other partnerships. So, if you feel the ground shifting, take note of where it’s flowing. That noted change will signal the possible need to develop new alliances. A promise will only last as long as it serves a purpose. To assess when it may begin to lose its commitment, consider the following.

 

Where you were

Knowing the environment a promise was made in, and the surrounding circumstances that led to its creation will give you a starting point from which to monitor its party’s commitment. Consider who the players were that entered into the alignment that made the promise. And, consider their source of power moving into the future. Making that assessment can serve as a bell-weather that indicates when you should consider forming new alliances. Being blind to such occurrences can leave you in a darkness that’s fraught with danger.

 

Your journey

As you reflect on the dilemma of lost trust, due to broken promises, think of the path that you and your allies have traveled. Consider what might have led or is leading to a separation of support you’ve provided for each other. Partnerships don’t dissolve overnight. There are always pending signs of potential danger. Look for them and heed warning signs on your path. Think about the variables that transpired that you possibly ignored due to circumstances that you didn’t want to consider or those that you intentionally chose to ignore. The purpose of that is to assess the mindset that you and your ally had as you traveled to the place that you now find the relationship. Ask yourself, what can I do now to increase my perceived value? Who might I align with to improve my position? And where might that alignment lead? You need firm footing to escape a slippery slope. Connecting with those that can extend support might be the support required to do just that.

 

Where you are

Now, you’re in a very precarious situation. Your most reliable ally has deserted you. And, you’re left surrounded by your enemies. What do you do? To survive, you must create new alliances. And you have to consider the trust factor. And you must ask, how long might a promise they make last? The answer that echoes back is, now is not the time to worry about that. You’re in survival mode.

If you want to survive, you must do whatever is required to sustain yourself. That may even include making alliances with the devil. Meaning, you may have to stretch very far outside of your comfort zone. But if survival is meaningful to you, you’ll do what it takes to prevent you from being taken by what you do.

 

Reflection

When you find yourself in a less than tenable position, due to broken promises, don’t be Pollyannaish. Look at your dilemma for what it is, not necessarily the way you want it to be. Everything changes. And as they do, they don’t have to leave you in a lurch. You can prevent that from occurring by being aware of shifting alliances and making sure that you’re aligned with powers that will remain powerful. Do that as long as an association serves your needs, and you’ll be less likely to be broken by broken promises … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

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“Negotiator – They Will Fight Back But Will They Conquer” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“To decrease your chances of being conquered, know how others will fight.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

Click here to get the book!

“Negotiator – They Will Fight Back But Will They Conquer”

He realized he’d be entering into a tough situation. In past interactions, verbal fights had broken out within this group. And tensions had frayed. Those frayed tensions led to increasing distrust amongst those discussing the proposed resolution.

Anticipating how someone might respond to an offer or proposal is something that you should always consider. Why? Because it impacts how you and they will interact. Thus, if you’ve had conflicts in the past, and nothing’s been done to address them satisfactorily, more than likely, they’ll fight you in the future.

The following is information you can use to plan, control, and dissuade others from attempting to conquer you. It’s a thought process that every good negotiator considers. And when someone fights to overcome your efforts, it’s insightful information that will arm you to combat them.

 

Planning

 

  • Fight/Flight/Stand Still
    • Before engaging in any forum, assess what occurred in prior encounters with its participating members. That history reflection will provide insights about the developments that might arise in your upcoming meeting with them. It also allows you the time to plan the actions and reactions you’ll promote to enhance your position.

In particular, consider whether you want the next encounter to end in a stalemate (you’re marking time to become stronger), you want the opposition to flee the potential conflict, recognizing your strength is too powerful for them to combat (be mindful of how you cast yourself – this may cause your opponents to seek greater power by building stronger coalitions), you’re going to fight for future positioning or as a means to get closer to its end.

  • Strategy
    • You should develop an approach based on what’s occurred in the past, the outcome that arose from using that plan, how those you engaged during that session reacted, and to what degree new players will enter into the upcoming activities. Taking into account those factors will allow you to shape the tactics you’ll develop to create and employ the best strategy.

 

  • Who are you
    • Another thought to consider is, who are you? That question answers the characteristics you possess. Some people can’t or won’t engage in some activities because it may be outside of their moral bearings. Having insight about your ethical boundaries will help you determine how far you’ll go to seek an outcome that may be crossing a line. Make the same assessment of those that you’ll be meeting.

 

Improvement

 

  • Interactions
    • Have you ever been in a situation where you didn’t get what you wanted, and yet you still felt good about the outcome? Even if you haven’t had that experience, that’s the emotional state you want to instill in others that deal with you. Leave them feeling that they walked away with something that they’re proud to have achieved.

The way you accomplish that feeling lies in how you deal with people. In some situations, you don’t want to appear stubborn, dogmatic, or immobile. In the wrong condition, people will detest you. But in the right circumstances, such a demeanor will aid in fostering the persona needed to back those that pose threats away from you. So, be aware of how you project your persona and make sure it matches the outcome you’re seeking. Doing so will prevent future consternation that might impede future progress.

 

  • Framing
    • Framing occurs when you control the narrative of a conversation. And, by framing an interaction in a particular manner, you control the discussion and the flow of the communication.
    • Outcome – No matter the outcome, think about how you’ll frame it so that it appears to be beneficial to your position.
    • Opponents – Think about how you’ll frame the opponents that have engaged you during and after an interaction. You can position them in a positive or negative light, depending on how you wish others to view them. The choice you make should depend on how you want them to interact with you going forward.

 

  • Future Interactions
    • Other players – When considering how you’ll improve future situations, consider who might become aligned with whom. That’ll impact the chances of future success for you and them. There may exist the opportunity to use their alliances to your advantage.

 

Reflections

In answering the question, they will fight back but will they conquer, the answer is, it depends. It depends on the variables that you identify and address that will influence the outcome of a meeting – and how successful you are in developing a plan that accurately addresses those variables. The point is, you’ll have more control of any encounter if you plan for it appropriately. Once you do, you’ll be less likely to be conquered in your engagements … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

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