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How to Really Overcome a Bully Before Negotiating

“A bully is a misguided person with perceived power. Extinguish his sources of power and you extinguish the bully.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Do you know how to really overcome a bully before negotiating with him? There you are. You’re negotiating against a bully! He’s someone that’s willing to lie, cheat, and steal to come out ahead in the negotiation. You think to yourself, ‘what can I do? This son-of-a-gun is not playing fair and I don’t know how to overcome him!’ The answer to, ‘what can I do’ was hidden in what occurred before the negotiation began.

The following insights will allow you to position yourself better to overcome a bully’s ploys before you negotiate with him.

Positioning:

In every negotiation, positioning occurs. It’s shown in the way the negotiators perceive each other and themselves. Thus, positioning is important because it determines how negotiators will interact with one another.

If you know you’ll be negotiating against someone that has bullied others in the past, before entering into the negotiation, attempt to discover the demeanor of those individuals. In particular seek to define whether they were perceived to be weak by your opponent due to their short-comings, or if your opponent felt empowered due to some other factor(s) he had going for himself at the time of the negotiation(s). That information will allow you to best position yourself from a position of strength. A bully’s loathing for weakness is the reason he only picks on targets that he perceives to be weak.

Leverage: (ploys you can employ when negotiating with a bully)

  • Using Other people
    • All bullies look up to someone. If you can find a way to curry favor with the bully’s icon, you can supplant his bullying efforts against you. After all, the bully wants an easy target. If the bully’s icon has favored you, that makes you less of a target to the bully.
  • Bully’s weakness
    • All bullies have an Achilles heel. It may be how they wish to be perceived by others. It may also appear in the form of the bully being perceived in one light versus another. Whatever it is, discover it and be prepared to exploit it during the negotiation if such is called for.
  • Bully’s Persona (his vanity)
    • If you’re aware of the pride a bully takes in having himself perceived in a certain light, attempt to alter that light; have it shine on someone or somewhere else. You will have taken away his source of motivation. Hold it hostage until he dismantles his bullying ways. The point is, hit him where you’ll get the most attention and where it will hurt him the most. Remember, he despises weakness and applauds strength.

Be Stealthy:

Every good negotiator gathers information about the opposing negotiator. When you know you’ll be negotiating against a bully, drip misinformation into places that he seeks to gather information about you. The better you can use such information to misguide him, the more difficult it’ll be for him to assess the type of negotiator you are; always be willing to display a different negotiation demeanor based on the opposing negotiator.

When engaging a bully in a negotiation, there are all kinds of mind games that occur. Utilize the insights above and you’ll be in a better mental state than the bully. The better you play the game, the greater the chance that you’ll be able to overcome a bully when negotiating … and everything will be right with the world.

What are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

#HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #Bully

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Health and Wellness Human Resources Management Women In Business

Combating Employee Apathy

Today I had lunch with a friend who is a cognitive neuroscientist. She was telling me about her research that identifies which patients are more likely to comply with their doctor’s instructions – whether regarding diet, medication, smoking, etc. – and which are likely to ignore instructions and continue their unhealthy habits, undeterred. She said there was one variable that was the strongest predictor of which path a person would choose: whether or not they demonstrated apathy.

In that situation, apathy stemmed from a variety of beliefs ranging from denial that the risks of their current lifestyle were as severe as doctors claimed, to lack of confidence that they would be able to maintain the new routine, or fear that it would simply be too much work. Whereas her examples pertained to healthcare, I realized that the apathy factor is just as obstructive in leadership and motivation.

For me, the question of converting apathy into motivation brings up an interesting question regarding who is responsible for this change. To what extent is it the employee’s responsibility to motivate themselves to perform better, and to what extent is it yours, as their supervisor, to help them find a reason to feel motivated?

An apathetic employee can be toxic to an organization. The longer you let them be, the more damage they can cause. Some would say that these are the employees you need to terminate, and soon. But sometimes it’s not that simple, such as when the company process for termination can take months or longer, and require substantial consistent documentation. Plus, many have the potential to turn around and become productive contributors with the right guidance and opportunities.

But how can you recognize apathy early on, before it’s too late?

There are a variety of warning signs of apathy. As all communication is conveyed through three primary channels – verbal, vocal and visual – let’s take a look at some of the signs in each area.

Verbally, listen for specific comments that indicate that someone is not on board, or doubts the value or validity of what he or she has heard. Passive-aggressive comments like, “Whatever,” “Here we go again,” or “it doesn’t matter what I say because nothing is going to change anyway,” are clear indicators that there is a serious disconnect between their perception of a situation and yours. Alternatively, a lack of voluntary, proactive engagement in conversations may indicate a lack of interest or a lack of confidence in something. Try to notice patterns in the person’s comments, as the words he uses will often either implicitly or explicitly indicate the nature of the problem.

Sometimes, however, the words themselves may not overtly indicate a problem, but as the saying goes, “it’s not what you say, it’s how you say it.” It becomes important to listen past the words to their delivery. Vocally, when that person speaks, do they sound interested in the topic, or tend to mumble their way through most conversations? Are they rushing through their comments like they just want to get the meeting over with? Is there something in their voice that sounds anxious, frustrated, terse, sad or distracted? What if you’re not sure what you’re hearing? The answer is simple: Ask.

Finally, trust your eyes. Look for behaviors that indicate a lack of connection, such as substandard performance, poor attendance, or lack of participation in group conversations or activities. Physical and behavioral signs can also include sighs of resignation or exasperation, eye-rolling or lack of eye contact, poor posture, and frowning.

It’s not to say that the occasional demonstration of any of these signs is an immediate red flag; after all, we all have good days and bad days. But when the behavioral exception turns into the rule, it’s time to give it a second look.

At that point once you have identified some patterns, it’s critical to speak with the employee and get to the heart of the apathy. You can’t determine a solution, or even guide someone else to finding their own solution, unless you find out what the root cause of the problem is. Often, apathy can be an indirect cry for help.

This kind of conversation can be one of the most intimidating and challenging conversation for leaders, but whatever you do, don’t ignore apathy. For those who are conflict-averse to start with, the issue is fraught with hazards and uncomfortable topics from the employee’s objectively poor performance to their subjectively negative attitude. If you need some help in broaching this discussion, check out my previous post and video for strategies and tips on how to initiate sensitive conversations.

You might discover that they don’t understand the importance of their role or how their work fits into the big picture. Alternatively, the work could be too easy and thus unstimulating, or too difficult and thus overwhelming. Maybe they are dealing with a stressful home situation such as a sick and elderly parent or child with special needs. Or they could feel like they don’t know how to fit into the company or departmental culture, which can be demoralizing.

Naturally, some of those issues are easier to address than others in helping the employee find solutions that inspire internal or intrinsic motivation (see Sharon Smith’s series here on this issue). But through constructive dialogue, you can determine mutually beneficial and responsible steps to take, such as empowering the employee with training for greater skills development and future career opportunities…. Or you may jointly decide that it’s in everyone’s best interest for you to introduce the employee to someone outside the company who could offer them a position that they will find fulfilling, and leave of their own volition, on good terms. But sometimes, just knowing that you noticed and cared enough to ask what’s going on can be a huge first step toward overcoming apathy, and changing attitudes, behaviors and performance.

Of course, the employee has to make the ultimate choice for him or herself, but part of leading and mentoring is helping people gain new perspectives and grow. The best leaders can find the right path to lead anyone.

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Accounting Best Practices Economics Entrepreneurship Health and Wellness Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Skills Women In Business

Life is Always Testing You; A Negotiation Inspirational Insight

“Tests are meant to measure your improvement. Life’s tests are meant to improve you!” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“Life is Always Testing You”

“This is a test. For the next 60 seconds …”

“Fear not the passing of time. Fear instead your lack of ability to use the gifts that time gives you.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Life is always testing us and thus, life is always a test. Be thankful for that because it means that you’re alive, with the ability to go higher in life.

We plan for one thing and something else happens. We set our expectations upon what we’ve planned for and life zags when we thought it was going to zig. At times, it can drive you nuts! But, you shouldn’t let it. Consider it as just another test that life is putting before you; it’s doing so to make you stronger. It’s doing so to see how quickly you can adapt to unexpected occurrences. To the degree that you don’t let such occurrences create mental angst within you, you’ll become infused with more resiliency in life, for your life. That can serve as a source of motivation to fortify your mental attitude and enhance your aptitude to achieve more in life.

The way we perceive and interpret what occurs in our life determines how we’ll adapt to those occurrences and how well we interact with them. Thus, if you view an occurrence from the perspective that it’s a test from which you can improve your abilities, the new/altered occurrence from what you expected can be viewed in a more positive light. That positive perspective should allow you to deal with the unplanned, unexpected occurrence easier and with less apprehension.

When something doesn’t serve you, don’t let it disserve you a second time. Occurrences will come to you from many different sources. Let the positive things that come from such sources support you. For those that detract from you and your goals, be thankful for their insights as you say goodbye to them, knowing that they too add value to your life.

Once you look at your life’s occurrences as being a value-add to your life, you will have adopted a mindset of openness, acceptance, and a mental state of ease. Once you do that … everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

Negotiations are fraught with occurrences that challenged your preconceived plans based on the plans you assembled for the negotiation. Again, to the degree you’re flexible in the flow of the negotiation and you’re adaptable to the changing flow that occurs in/during it, the better a grip you’ll have on determining its outcome. That means you should manage your emotional state during the negotiation, constantly be thinking of any hidden meanings in unspoken and spoken words and any additional insight that body language gestures convey. That assembly of insights will make you a more formattable negotiator, which will lead to better negotiation outcomes for you.

What are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to  sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

#HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #Lifetest

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Entrepreneurship Health and Wellness Management Technology

Craig Weiss Shares How His Company Will Allow Us To Control Our Dreams

As part of my nationally syndicated radio show, Take the Lead, I interview top leaders and successful individuals who share their success stories.  I recently had the chance to interview Craig Weiss, Founder and CEO of Aladdin Dreamer, a technology company that is designing a wearable that allows people to control their dreams. He originally practiced patent law. Prior to Aladdin Dreamer, Craig oversaw NJOY, Inc. the world’s largest independent electronic cigarette and vaping company as President and later as CEO.

To hear the entire interview, you can go to the podcast version, which includes an interview with David Mead, who co-wrote Find Your Why with Simon Sinek and Peter Docker: http://www.podcastgarden.com/episode/david-mead-and-craig-weiss_118355 or you can see the video interview with Craig Weiss on Youtube at: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SH3c7OpVTZg&t=1613s

The following are highlights of what Craig discussed in our interview.

  • How Aladdin Dream will allow customers to control their dreams
  • His experience in the vaping industry and how he was lambasted
  • How receiving a law degree impacted his success
  • His startup company and how he is raising funds
  • Serial entrepreneurship issues
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Best Practices Health and Wellness Human Resources Management Marketing Skills Women In Business

When You’re Just Too Busy

We wear busy like a badge of honor. Busy has become a status symbol within our society, which is crazy when you stop to consider how terrible it is to our productivity, personal well-being and relationships. We believe if we aren’t busy, we aren’t productive.

Researchers have discovered people are feeling overwhelmed at work dealing with constant distractions that then spill over into our personal lives, affecting our recovery, families and friendships. The result: the feeling of anxiety, stress, fatigue and a lack of focus on what matters most.

The Centre for Time Use Research at Oxford University says the total amount of time people work is the same as it’s always been and data indicates people who say they’re the busiest generally aren’t.

Question is: If we aren’t actually busier than in the past, why do we feel like it?  

Part of the answer is simple – attention is our new currency and is more valuable than ever before. With a constant stream of incoming emails, meetings to attend, things to read, ideas to execute, it’s no wonder we feel unable to give our undivided attention to what is most important.  When you couple everything competing for our attention with the digital age of technology, it’s no wonder we are feeling overwhelmed, overstressed and overtired. Fact is: we work 24×7. We never get a break.

Technology and societal pressures leave us feeling the need to be accessible to everyone all the time. As a result, everything suffers. Ironically, being constantly accessible actually decreases our productivity, not the other way around. When we feel rushed, we actually suffer from decreased production, focus and attention to detail. The pace of which we work slows, we are more apt to make mistakes and more likely to disconnect from meaningful relationships.

When we are overwhelmed and lack concentrated focus, we inadvertently compile our stress by taking on even more obligations than we can handle. Before we know it, we are sacrificing what matters most to suffice what matters now. Even worse, we have preprogrammed ourselves to believe we must always be on, plugged in and responsive. We fail to give ourselves the necessary time to recover and refocus.

It’s time to change our mindset. It’s time for an Attention Revolution.  We must stop considering busy as an indication of our importance. We must measure our success not by the time it takes to complete a task, rather the results we achieve. It’s time to prioritize what matters most to us and use those priorities as filters for what we commit to doing. We must learn to say ‘no’ to requests for our time that steal our attention from what matters most. It’s time to start realizing the value our undivided attention brings to relationships, productivity and accountability.

Maybe then, we’ll see we aren’t as busy as we thought we were.

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Entrepreneurship Health and Wellness Management Marketing Technology

Billionaire Naveen Jain Shares His Moon Shot

As part of my nationally syndicated radio show, Take the Lead, I interview top leaders and successful individuals who share their success stories. Naveen Jain, the billionaire behind Viome and Moon Express, sat down for a live interview with me.

To hear the entire interview, you can go to:  http://drdianehamilton.com/episodes and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Z0KVSnO9Ow&t=219s.

The following are highlights of what he discussed in our interview:

  • Going from being poor to becoming a billionaire is a mindset
  • Ask what can I do about a problem
  • What if energy becomes like oxygen and does not cost money
  • Abundance makes things demonetized
  • Half of the Fortune 500 companies will go bankrupt in next 15 years
  • The pace of disruption
  • What Uber has accomplished and what will happen to them
  • What is your moonshot and what is possible
  • Smaller problems are harder to solve then bigger ones
  • How to get to the point of landing on the moon
  • Don’t have a plan B as a crutch
  • How to create a billion-dollar company
  • Reason people buy products
  • Curing all disease
  • Better to get into industries with which you are not familiar
  • 70% of serotonin is produced in the gut and not the brain
  • Tony Robbins and Peter Diamandis and the Joe Polish Genius Network event
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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Health and Wellness Management Women In Business

Achieve Peak Performance – Pay Attention to Your Well-Being

Some of the smartest and most successful people I know understand in order to have the ability to work at peak performance levels requires incredible energy and stamina. To have that consistently, one has to schedule recovery time. It’s as important to your bottom line as landing that big client or making the next sale. Let this sink in:  According to SHRM (Society for Human Resource Management, 85% of talent managers agree employees who use most (or all) of their vacation time are more productive and focused.

See, part of taking care of yourself is being a champion for your own physical and mental well-being. That’s why you’ll see extraordinary leaders plan and take vacation down time. That means disconnection from responsibility, technology, and even emails! (That last one scared you a little, didn’t it? Studies show that over 50% of employees check work-related emails after hours, on vacation and during holidays. STOP.) While it’s not always possible to completely “unplug”, it should be a goal to use your down time as true time away. To replenish the mind and spirit. To shake out the cobwebs. Find new perspective. Renew energy levels. And make quality time to pay ATTENTION to loved ones the top priority.

I read an article not long ago in Fortune Magazine that shared how Europeans think Americans are crazy because while they take up to six weeks of vacation per year, statistics show that US employees leave 429 million vacation days on the table annually. Interestingly 40% of executives think employees would be more productive if they took vacations. Yet among those same senior managers, 72% said if offered unlimited vacation time they wouldn’t take it! What’ THAT about?

If what you REALLY want is to be better at what you do, and have a better life while you’re doing it – try these three strategies for scheduling recovery and downtime: 

Plan early: One thing we do as a team, is review calendars at the first part of the year and plan a variety of trips during that year and might include cars, bikes, pool time or trips back to Australia to see family and friends. It’s a practice we have followed for many years to ensure the majority of vacations are scheduled to give us experiences to look forward to. Can you review your calendar and book time to enjoy something that you love to do with people you love being with?

Create variety: Look for ways you can mix it up – with a variety of destinations, adventures and times of year based on your needs and budgets. I’m not a stay-cation kind of gal. My office is in my home (maybe you have one there too.) That means I would just work the whole time, so that doesn’t work for me. For some people, it works. Consider visiting a new spot, driving instead of flying, build in adventure, art galleries visits, or a walking tour of a city. With so many online tools to help plan your visit, you can leverage community events, support local initiatives and experience cities and towns in a completely new way. We often use the site HomeAway.com, as I prefer an apartment or a house than a hotel when traveling for extended stays. We have used this service around the world and have loved it every time. My career allows me the luxury of travel to incredible places staying in lovely hotels and yet some vacations the idea of getting on another plane or staying in another hotel. Can you and your family choose a new adventure in the next twelve months that everyone can help plan to enjoy a trip together?

Go offline: This is the toughest ask for many of our clients (and me) but it’s not impossible! Can you create an out of office message that bounces back to manage email providing an alternative person to help while you are away? Can you stay off social media and instead focus all that time and attention on creating memories with those you love? I am a huge fan of a digital detox; your vacation is a great time to do that.

Get outside. There’s something incredibly life-affirming about getting outdoors in beautiful new space. Think mountain hikes, a walk on a nature path, collecting shells on a beach, or catching fish on a lake. Have you ever noticed how much better you feel, how much deeper you sleep and how much healthier you feel on vacation when you invest time to be active while you are relaxing?

Create memories: Truly, isn’t one of the biggest reasons we work so hard is to create a lifestyle for our loved ones? Keep this in mind – recovery time is not always just about your taking a break, it’s about taking the time to create special experiences with family and friends. It’s about connection. It’s also NOT negotiable for any leader who wants to excel. If you want to accelerate your leadership and be a productive contributor on your team? Take time off. You will be more fun to work with, more focused and energized and you will create memories with people you care about, and isn’t that the reason many of us work?

Here’s my challenge to you: Pay attention to what matters. You, your health, and your loved ones all benefit from scheduled recovery, book yours today.  Need more convincing or ideas how you can achieve peak performance through regularly scheduled recovery time? Check out this video and learn how professionals can achieve maximum productivity results, focus and dedicated attention to goals and priorities through recovery time.

 

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Growth Health and Wellness Management Technology Women In Business

7 Attention Saving Strategies to Manage Email Distractions

Could you accelerate daily productivity with tips to manage email distractions? According to a report by McKinsey, 28% of a person’s workday is spent checking email.  Sound familiar? That’s over one quarter of your entire business day is allocated just to manage emails. It’s a wonder any of us get anything done. Studies show that 26% of employees admit email is their number one distraction, and I believe that.

Here’s what I’d like you to remember – emails are requests from other people who want YOUR time and ATTENTION to accomplish THEIR objectives. While it is, of course, a necessary form of communication – YOU get to set the terms of how it is used, putting YOU in control of your time. Your time is far too valuable to let others determine how you spend it. So, what’s a person to do?

Here are seven of my favorite strategies to manage email distraction:

  1. Invest 15 minutes.This is something I’m passionate about. I love breaking things down into manageable bits. Manage email in 15-minute increments. Set the timer on your iPhone, play a game and answer as many as you can. Then move onto a more strategic activity.
  2. Put a limit on it.According to a University of British Columbia study, to manage email distractions means limiting your reading of email to three times per day reduces stress and distractions by 47%, boosting productivity and focus. That’s huge!
  3. Unplug from the unwanted. Millions of people use me, which is a fabulous tool that allows you to unsubscribe from email subscriptions that are filling up your inbox. If you’re not reading them, skip that distraction, save yourself valuable time and just unsubscribe.
  4. Block it out. Freedomis a cool distraction management tool that I use on my Mac and iPhone to block social media sites and email. It’s kind of the internet version of a do not disturb sign and it’s ideal for creating focused, uninterrupted time when you’re looking to increase productivity. More than 450,000 people use this app across multiple electronics.
  5. Create short cutsText Expander is one of my fave apps on my Mac. It is so simple. By allowing you to load short cuts for regularly used responses, words, and templates, it can save an ah-mazing amount of time. If you find that you respond to emails with similar information on a regular basis, this app might be one of your new faves as well!
  6. Bounce them back.If you use Gmail, this one might be the answer you’ve looked for. Boomerang for Gmail is a great service to manage emails by allowing you to bounce emails back to you when you want to answer them and write emails and schedule delivery for another time. Helps to keep that inbox overwhelm at bay.
  7. To-Do list it.I haven’t tried it yet, but for fans of to-do lists, the Taskforce app sounds like a solution. It lets you transform your emails into tasks and comes with an automatic filtering feature.

Being a leader in today’s world means challenging the way you work, communicate, interact, and manage your time and talent. When you recognize how very valuable your hours are, you start to get protective of them. Fortunately, there are brilliant people out there creating new dynamic tools every day that can help us effectively streamline our workdays, so that we reclaim that mismanaged time and invest it making memorable moments by paying ATTENTION to the important people in our lives.  When you do? You will have more impact and influence at work, at home, and in your community. That’s a win-win-win for everyone!

If your emails have merely become a means in which to communicate to others, it’s time to make them a way you can genuinely connect. When your emails are elevated to be more personal, personable, connected and sincere, others will not only want to read them, they’ll enjoy doing so.

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Growth Health and Wellness Technology

Digital Transformation Drives Strange Bedfellows

The dust is clearing on the recent announcement that CVS is acquiring Aetna in a deal that surprised many observers. But it shouldn’t surprise you, if you have been paying attention to the way digital transformation is creating new threats and opportunities in formerly staid industries.

Aetna is in the health insurance business and has been trying to get bigger, but regulators have turned down that approach in recent years. So, for Aetna, it makes sense that, if you can’t acquire and you are concerned about competing at your current size, you would agree to be acquired.

What surprised people was who the acquirer was, because people still think of CVS as a retail chain. CVS is indeed a retail chain and it is clearly making this move because Amazon (and to a lesser extent, Walmart) are within striking distance of a broad attack on specialized retailers, such as drug stores. While many retailers are shrinking amidst this onslaught, CVS has an option to pivot from pure retail to healthcare, where it might be a lot easier to compete with a physical presence.

CVS has been sprinkling its MinuteClinic urgent care facilities in many of its retail locations and has become a powerhouse in the drug coverage market with Caremark, so adding Aetna  makes a lot more sense for a healthcare company that happens to have a retail presence. If that, in fact, seems like what Amazon is becoming, with its recent acquisition of Whole Foods, maybe that’s no mistake.

A joke has been circulating in recent years as to whether Amazon can become Walmart faster than Walmart can become Amazon. CVS has evidently heard that joke and beaten Amazon to the punch (line). CVS already has a deal with the Cleveland Clinic to provide a platinum option for the very best care that can be delivered through telemedicine. If Amazon jumps in, don’t be surprised to see clinics in Whole Foods with telemedicine options, too.

It would be one thing if this were all happening just to cut costs, but it is really the patient experience that is driving the changes every bit as much as cost. When you are sick, you don’t want to call the doctor and hope for an appointment during business hours. You want to make an appointment 24×7 as easily as you summon an Uber car and get your prescription at the same place you get your diagnosis. That’s the new experience that is possible already for minor problems. What CVS is betting is that major problems that need more than a nurse practitioner can be handled through in-network doctors and high-end specialist through telemedicine with the nurse practitioner right there to assist. Instead of being referred to a specialist, maybe they can summon a specialist on your first appointment.

Now there is a lot to be worked out, but you can see the direction it is going in. Healthcare is likely to be a very interesting space in the next few years. All the local practices have been bought up by the hospital health care networks who have bet heavily on local providers as though the current model will last forever and they just need to lower prices. My guess is the retailers will bet more on a low-cost MinuteClinic model with in-network doctors (like Aetna’s networks) and a high end telemedicine model. Over time, there should be considerable price pressure on the hospital networks getting squeezed in between.

If you’re not in healthcare or retail, maybe you think you’re off the hook. Guess again. The kinds of pressures causing these cross-industry mergers are the very essence of what digital transformation causes. If you aren’t staring down your customer experience and asking how digital can change the game, you are just waiting for someone else to disrupt you.

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Growth Health and Wellness Women In Business

What is Your Bottom Line?

Years ago I was a project manager for an international franchise organization who was involved in acquisitions and rebrandings. I was working closely with their legal counsel primarily dealing with franchise agreements and defining trading areas. This legal team was amazing! They were so bright, talented, focused and strategic. We had a great rapport.

On one occasion two members flew in from Montreal to Toronto to meet with me. We had a tight deadline and too much to do. We had been hard at work all day and it was going on 7:00 pm. Our eyes were starting to burn and we were feeling nausea from all of the reading. At one point one of the lawyer’s said, “I can’t believe I came all this way to feel sick! If I read one more Appendix D, I’m going to throw up!”

I thought that was a good time to change the mood so I started singing , “ I would walk 500 miles” then the other lawyer sang, “And I would walk 500 hundred more” lastly Mr. Appendix D sang, “Just to be the man who walks a thousand miles and falls down at your door!” Then Mr. Appendix D found that song on his laptop and played it. The three of us stood up and stomped around the boardroom. It was a great stress relief! We worked well into the night and managed to meet our ambitious deadline.

A few days later they were back in Montreal and called me to help them out with mediation. They had an unintentional situation that needed damage control. One of the lawyer’s filled me in on the pertinent history and another lawyer began to coach me as to what to say and what not to say. After about half an hour of coaching I told her that this seems too complicated. Then I asked her, “What is your bottom line?”

I continued, “Be fair, and tell me what your best case scenario is?” She told me the best case scenario. Then she explained that she didn’t think I would be able to even get to that point in the mediation, as the other party’s mediator was known to be very aggressive. She wished me luck.

About an hour later I was on a conference call with the other party’s mediator. I said “hello” and then she interrupted me to begin her rant. I pressed the mute button and ate my golden delicious apple (it was really delicious). She went on and on and on. It must have been at least 20 minutes, which is a really long time to be yelled at by someone I didn’t even know. She eventually paused, so I thought that was my cue to start.

I had a lot of work to do and was not interested with dragging this out any further, so I simply proposed the bottom line. She was silent. I asked her to kindly relay the proposal to their legal counsel and ask them to reply to our legal counsel. I wished her a good day and then I hung up the phone. Done!

It was the end of the work day and my phone rang as I was getting ready to leave the office. I picked it up. It was the legal counsel. They were so happy to inform me that the other party accepted the proposal. They asked me what it is that I said to be so convincing. I told them, “I silenced her with a fair offer. No one can argue with that – not even her!” We laughed.

The next day, I received a beautiful bouquet of flowers, a delightful basket with cheese, crackers and chocolates and a card that read, “Special delivery from 500 miles!”

Michelle Nasser, Executive Coach michellenasser.leaders@gmail.com