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“Negotiator – This Is How To Avoid Manipulation Of False Choices” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“To avoid manipulation from offering false choices, know their intent.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

“Negotiator – This Is How To Avoid Manipulation Of False Choices”

 

As a kid, when my friends and I played games that required choosing who’d go first, we flipped a coin. While one person flipped the coin, the other person would call heads or tail. Then, one day before a coin flip, one of my friends said to the other, “heads I win, tails, you lose.” And after the coin flip, he won the call. We were very young, and initially, we were unaware of the manipulation that had occurred. Later in life, as a negotiator, I understood how choices could lead to manipulation and how manipulation can lead people to engage in actions that are against their self-interest.

The following information will help you avoid being manipulated, as a result of people offering you false choices.

 

Expectation

A good negotiator is aware of setting goals for a negotiation. And she’s doubly conscious that she’ll have to make choices throughout the talks to achieve her goals. Part of that process is setting the expectations of the opposing negotiator, such that he will have a perspective of what he can achieve. The setting of expectations also assists in avoiding being manipulated by an opposer that might offer false choices.

Thus, before, and sometimes during a negotiation, the better you are at setting expectations, the lower the probability will become that false options will thwart you. And that will enhance your negotiation abilities, interactions with the other negotiator, along with a smoother negotiation process.

 

Identifying Choices

Okay. Now that you’ve set expectations, what should you be aware of when offered choices during the negotiation? The answer is, it depends. It depends on the strategy you’ve set per what you thought would occur during the process. And you should take into account the events that happen during the negotiation that you’d not anticipated. Per the latter, if someone offers you a choice such as the “heads I win, tails you lose” scenario, which you now know is an attempt to manipulate you into a false choice, you can turn the tables. One way to do that is to let the other negotiator know you’re aware of the manipulation attempts that might occur. If she asks why you’re making that statement, tell her you’re stating it so both of you can avoid them, which will make the negotiation process less challenging.

 

Weighing Options

There’s another facet to consider when weighing choices. Some negotiators will offer options in a yes or no format or an either-or perspective. The point is, some choices lead you to a false premise. Those choices limit your options, and the ability to improve your outcome.

Be aware of when a negotiator offers such decisions to you. And be mindful of when someone is attempting to place you in an untenable position. By being alert to their efforts, it’ll help you slip the bind they try to put you in with false choices. So, make sure you weigh your options and consider where someone’s attempts may be attempting to take you.

 

Antithesis

An antithesis is a direct opposite of what’s said or done prior. Thus, you should be aware of when a negotiator presents a choice in this manner because it can be the beginning stage of manipulation. The reason being, an option offered in this manner, might be akin to a good cop, bad cop offer.

That means, if you don’t accept the first choice, the second one will be worse, and the following options will be worse than the preceding ones. Thus, if you’re not mentally alert to what’s occurring, you could find your emotions pulling you down a path that you should be avoiding. Why? Because the pathway will be taking you further away from your goals.

 

Negative Thoughts

Another form of manipulation stems from negative thoughts your opponent has about you or those you have about her. That’s why you should assess her thoughts before the beginning of a negotiation – because negative thoughts impact one’s perception, and it influences their interaction.

Suppose you’re aware that negative thoughts exist between negotiators. What should you do? It would be best if you attempted to improve the relationship before you negotiate. If you don’t, both of you may become drawn into a manipulative course of negative actions as the result of ill feelings.

To combat negative emotions, offer to be collaborative in your efforts to achieve an acceptable outcome. In a worst-case scenario, your opponent may reject your offer. If she does, you might consider asking her how, or if, she’d like to proceed. If she says she doesn’t want to continue, you may have avoided a tumultuous experience from which you’ll probably be better off. On the positive side, if she’s amenable to your offer, you may be able to lower your guard. But don’t drop it too much, you may have to raise it quickly.

 

Anger

Above all, when engaging in a negotiation, control your emotions. Don’t let anger shade your decisions or how you view the other negotiator. If you don’t control anger, you invite the opportunity for manipulation to foster choices that may not be pertinent per the solution required.

When you sense anger is on the rise, get away from the environment. Call a time out. When you’re in an angered state, it’s best to calm yourself before engaging in any action. Doing that will save you future challenges and problems in the negotiation.

 

Reflection

To a degree, it’s a negotiator’s job during a negotiation to pose questions that help her maximize her outcome. Thus, it behooves her to offer manipulation choices that take her counterpart in the direction that suits her goals. As her counter negotiator, it’s your job to present her with manipulation choices. Thus, both of your efforts are to thwart the other’s attempt from causing the outcome to be lopsided against themselves. Therefore, by being attentive to the choices offered, and where those choices may lead, you can avoid the manipulation that’s inherent in every negotiation. And everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://c-suitenetwork.com/radio/shows/greg-williams-the-master-negotiator-and-body-language-expert-podcast/

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Choices #Manipulation #BodyLanguageSecrets #csuitenetwork #thoughtcouncil #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Bodylanguage #readingbodylanguage #Negotiation #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #negotiationPsychology #HowToNegotiateBetter #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Control #Conversations #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

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Growth Human Resources Negotiations Skills Women In Business

“This Is How To Conquer A Scary Negotiation Bully” – Negotiation Insight

“The scary thing about fear is whether you dare to conquer it.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

“This Is How To Conquer A Scary Negotiation Bully”

 

People don’t realize; they’re always negotiating.

She bullied me in that negotiation. Why did you allow her to bully you, was the question asked by the associate? I’m not sure. I think I did because she was tough, mean, and scary. I was intimidated by the tone and tactics she used and the berating she subjected me to throughout our talks. I know I lost the negotiation. But I just wanted to get away from her.

The preceding conversation occurred between two associates. They were talking about a buzzsaw of a woman that one of them had encountered during his negotiation. When dealing with a bully, you learn as much about yourself as you do the bully, especially when it comes to the actions you take to avoid danger.

It’s natural to avoid danger. That’s what cautions your brain when you sense it. But too much caution can paralyze you into a state of inaction. And that won’t benefit you in the long run. Thus, when dealing with a bully, consider the following ideas.

 

Assessing Power

  • Understanding Bully’s Self-View

Before you can understand a bully’s motivation, you must recognize how he sees himself. Does he consider himself to be a stable genius or some other praiseworthy phrase to represent himself? If so, that might be a sign that he’s riding high on his ego. Whether it’s warranted might be something to question. The arching point is, by understanding his self-view, you’ll have an idea from which to create a defense based on that perception.

  • Sources of Power

It’s always advisable to understand the source of a bully’s power. One way to identify his power sources is to observe who he follows, what the norms are of the followers, and to what degree he’s motivated to stay in favor with them. With that information, you can become better prepared to confront and conquer his forays against you.

  • Why You

Ask yourself, why is the bully, bullying you. Does he sense weakness that he can exploit? If so, what is that weakness, and how can you overcome his perception? The more insight you can gather about this aspect of a bully, the more understanding you’ll have to conquer his actions.

  • Bully’s Needs

Okay. You have a perspective about the bully’s sources of power. But the essential component of that assessment is why the bully seeks authority. And what needs does power satisfy for him? Most people become driven to have dominion over something. But most people temper the way they go about achieving it. A bully’s drive for such a quest can be born from feeling insignificant, the desire to live up to someone’s expectation, or the need for acceptance. By identifying his needs, you capture the ambitions behind his actions.

 

Assembling Allies

  • Your Best Allies
    • At some point, you must confront the bully. To do that, consider the allies you’ll utilize to assist you. Your best supporters will be those the bully fears, and those that’ll stand with you in confronting the bully.

 

  • Know Bully’s Allies
    • Having a sense of who supports the bully will help you understand his source of strength. It’ll also help when targeting those that might assist you. And that knowledge will allow you to be better prepared when you confront the bully.

 

  • Utilizing Influencers
    • While a bully’s supporters may be his influencers, there may be others that the bully would like to emulate. If you identify them, and they align with your thoughts, you can point to them as role models for the bully to follow. That would give him something to consider per altering his behavior.

 

Addressing The Bully

  • Confronting The Bully
    • Before engaging the bully, plan your approach, and determine which negotiation strategies you’ll use. Also, prepare for how you’ll inform him of his actions related to him bullying you.

 

  • In considering how you’ll approach the subject of his bullying, you must consider the best time to do it. You don’t want to engage him when others are with him – that might serve as energy for him to become more aggressive.

 

  • Once engagement occurs, attempt to control the narrative. The person controlling the conversation controls the discussion. Be polite, but firm.

 

 

  • Using Negotiation Tactics
    • A significant tactic that negotiators employ is to divide and conquer. And it’s one you should consider using. The point of gathering allies of the bully was to assess who might flip to your side. Thus, to utilize this tactic, give his supporters an incentive to flip. The more of them you can turn, the more leverage you’ll have when dealing with the bully.

 

  • Another strategy is to threaten the bully by challenging his power source. In some cases, his supporters may not know he’s using their cachet. By threatening to reveal his antics to those individuals, you might create the pressure needed for him to abandon bullying you.

 

  • Some bullies are so full of themselves that you can lure them into untenable situations by using bait. The bait could be getting him to secretly attempt to obtain something of which his supporters would find distasteful. Your goal is to create conflict amongst him and his supporters. To that end, you should use bait that’s almost too good for him to pass up. If he takes the bait, sound an alarm to his supporters without having it associated with you. That will keep his focus off of you.

 

Reflection

The information could have been simply titled, “How To Conquer A Bully” because whether one is scary or not, he can cause angst to rise in you. And since you’re always negotiating, regardless of whom you’re dealing with, you employ negotiation strategies in your interactions. Thus, the title intends to convey a pinpointed perspective from a broad point of view. Therefore, while dealing with a bully can be scary, if you employ the insights mentioned, you’ll have a better chance of thwarting a bully’s attempts to bully you. And everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://cms.megaphone.fm/channel/CSN3928767635?selected=CSN2004356661

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#BodyLanguageSecrets #csuitenetwork #thoughtcouncil #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Bodylanguage #readingbodylanguage #Negotiation #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #negotiationPsychology #HowToNegotiateBetter #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Control #Conversations #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

Categories
Growth Human Resources Negotiations Skills Women In Business

“What Will You Do When The Leader Is Powerless” – Negotiation Insight

“A leader is as powerful as his followers allow him to be.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

“What Will You Do When The Leader Is Powerless”

 

People don’t realize; they’re always negotiating.

 

Leaders possess power because others give it to them. And the power of a leader is continuously shifting, which makes the dynamics of a leader’s power something to note. While the shifts may occur over an extended time, if you observe the flow of its direction, you can insulate yourself from being on the wrong side of a leader’s waning power.

No matter what your title or function is, you’re a leader in some capacity. And that’s why you should be concerned about the flow of power below and above you. Those shifts impact the impact you have. Question – why might you not want to be on the side of a leader that’s losing influence, which is what power is? Answer – your power can decline when you’re associated with someone that’s losing his control.

The ensuing are insights about the sources of power and influence. You’ll also discover how to protect yourself when it stems from a more significant source, along with what you might consider when power is shifting.

 

Leadership Style

It’s essential to observe the style of a leader. It lends credence to what he promotes, why he commits specific actions, and what activities and causes he may engage. For this purpose, I sort leaders into two categories.

  • Selfish

Self-interest is a perspective that all leaders share. The difference between some is good leaders balance self-interest against the needs of their followers. But exceptional leaders put the interest of their followers ahead of their own.

One way to assess a leader’s style is to note when he places the interest of others above his own. Conversely, if you observe an increasing trend towards his self-interest, that might be your sign to disassociate from him – his followers will eventually do so. At worse, you should become more alert to the length of time a leader’s downward trend continues. Your fortunes and future will depend on the time you’re connected to him.

 

  • Selfless

A genuine selfless leader tends to be more appreciated by his followers. And, when given the choice of whom to follow, all things equal, this style is what most people will embrace. Accordingly, if you attach yourself to this leadership style, you’re more likely to attract a more profound following. Then, when the leader becomes powerless, depending on the situation, you’ll be more likely to step up, or into the leadership void.

 

Power Sources

It’s good to know the origins of a leader’s power. Once you’ve identified it, you can observe when that leader’s influence may expire.

  • Temporary Power

With temporary power, a leader can be in an ‘acting’ or trial bases position. No matter how long his supremacy lasts, in the overall scheme of time, all power sources are temporary. Therefore, when calculating the probability of a leader losing power, consider what he’s currently doing with it, and how people are responding. While addressing a leader that possesses temporary power can be beneficial to your cause, staying connected too long can become detrimental to your longterm goals.

  • Positional Power

A leader’s positional power stems from current circumstances and environments. Thus, his influence can constantly shift, based on changing conditions. And that may expose him to becoming powerless sooner than later. Consequently, some people may forego extending their loyalty to him.

While you can lend support to a leader that has positional power, you should consider how long he’ll have his status, what he’ll do when his power is gone, and who’ll assume the leadership mantle when it occurs. While connected to one leader, always keep an eye out for the one rising on the horizon. The latter will be the future, and since the future will become the present, you can gain more power by helping a future leader amass more authority today.

 

Protecting Power

  • Manage Expectations

Regardless of a leader’s power, he should always manage the expectations of how he’ll use it. If he doesn’t, others will set the expectations for him. If their expectations are overblown, the leader has a problem. The question then becomes, when will it occur, and how will he deal with it? That could create an opportunity for you if you’re savvy enough to warn him and then protect him from potential blowback. That should ingratiate him to you, which can serve as your top power source for the time being.

 

  • Observe Sources Of Power

You can gain insight when it’s time to untie bonds with a specific leader, based on how he conducts himself, and with whom he’s attracting as his followers. Since the dynamics of a leader’s power is dependent on his followers, when that base begins to decline due to his ill deeds, that might be your signal to unaffiliate with him. Otherwise, you may fall as he descends.

 

Leader’s Associates

  • Associate’s Goals

Understanding the goals of the leader’s associates’ will inform you of what they seek from him. That will allow you to gauge how long associates might follow that leader before disassociating. And that’ll be your tripwire as to when you might take action.

  • Controlling Your Power

Your power lies within the sources of a leader’s associates. Therefore, if you can impact a leader’s followers, you can have a degree of influence upon the leader. To maximize your efforts, stay close to the leader’s associates, but distant enough to avoid negativity once the leader’s power begins to wane. To do that, keep your ears and eyes open for a changing tide to ensure you’re not swept away by it.

 

Reflection

Everyone should be concerned about the leader with whom they give power. Even when it’s a close friend or associate, when you give someone power, you provide them with dominion over you. That impacts your life. Because that person will influence the way you think and your opportunities.

Thus, to the question of what will you do when the leader’s powerless, observe when the leader is losing power and break when appropriate. That’s not to say, desert a leader because he no longer has influence. It’s to state when a leader engages in dastardly deeds, and he’s a negative weight on your success, consider lifting your anchor. That will allow you to find a better leader. And everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Leader #csuitenetwork #thoughtcouncil #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Bodylanguage #readingbodylanguage #Negotiation #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #negotiationPsychology #HowToNegotiateBetter #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Control #Conversations #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

 

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“Negotiator Do You Know How To Stop Deadly Emotions” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“Emotions can be easy to control, once you learn how to control them.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert  (Click to Tweet)

 Click here to get the book!

 

“Negotiator: Do You Know How To Stop Deadly Emotions?”

 

People don’t realize; they’re always negotiating.

 

Negotiators engaged in easygoing negotiations attribute the flow of the talks to their emotions. For discussions burdened by slowdowns and setbacks, that too is usually due to emotions attached to the negotiation. And that’s why you should be alert to the feelings shown throughout your bargaining sessions. They impact how the interactions will progress and how each negotiator will view the other.

The following are insights on how to detect deadly emotions. The ideas will help you negotiate away from negative emotions that could ruin your talks. Once armed with this information, you’ll be able to avoid deadly conflicts at the negotiation table, while maintaining greater control of the negotiation.

 

Negotiator Psychology

Negotiators possess different mindsets at different stages during negotiations. That mindset becomes altered based on what occurs during the exchange of information. Thus, the triggers ignited within the minds of the negotiators, ignites the emotions that follow from the triggers. Accordingly, as is the case when dealing with people in general, you must take into consideration what prompted the mood they display. To that end, be aware of the following mindsets, along with what promotes them to become prevalent in your talks.

 

Aggrieved

A disturbed negotiator seeks ways to assuage his feelings. And if those disturbing feelings occur during a negotiation, he’ll most likely attempt to project his mood onto you. So, how might you contend with someone of this ilk? The answer is, it depends.

If the distempered demeanor is due to something he attributes to you, attempt to understand his emotional point of contention. You won’t know how to address his sourness until you uncover the reasoning for his discontentment.  After you’ve identified and attempted to correct his sulkiness, if his demeanor doesn’t shift, you may have to play hardball with a hardballer. If you’re up for it, prepare for battle. If not, seek someone to negotiate on your behalf.

 

Pleasing

This negotiator type can be easy. His temperament is one where he goes along to get along. Nevertheless, please don’t sell this individual short by thinking you can have your way because of his initial desire to be pleasing. If he perceives you as being overbearing, untrustworthy, or overly demanding, he may transform into the aggrieved negotiator mentioned a moment ago. And then, instead of stopping deadly emotions from hampering your negotiation, you may have just given life to the death of it.

 

Neutral

The neutral negotiator type enters the negotiation with emotions that are unaligned. That state is a, “let’s wait and see what happens. Then, I’ll adopt the persona that I’ll display.”

Since this person has an open mind when entering the negotiation, the way you treat him will shape his emotions. The trick is the balance you must maintain between acquiring what you want, compared to what he wants, and what you’re willing to give. That can be a delicate balancing act to perform. Still, if you and he maintain an exuberant state of emotions throughout the process, the avoidance of deadly emotions should be easy to accomplish.

 

Detecting Emotional Shifts

 

Mindfulness

Before becoming aware of unpleasant emotions, you must possess mindfulness about the environment. That means you must be mindful of verbal and nonverbal cues emitted by the other negotiator, along with other gestures that convey his emotional state of mind. If you miss those inputs, you’ll miss outcries for attention. And that could lead you deeper into a negotiation fraught with deadly emotions ahead.

 

Nonverbal Utterances

Per tones emitted, some negotiators convey their sentiment to statements made by grunting – that’s an example of a nonverbal emotional display. That grunt is a negotiator’s sign signaling the expression of his feelings. And that utterance will occur based on what was said or done. Note when it happens. It has meaning.

 

Communication

People communicate through their words, body language gestures, and nonverbal sounds. To detect when an emotional shift occurs, observe when someone’s verbiage becomes more pronounced, an escalation in their declarations, and heightened nonverbal communication. Such signs will denote a change in their mental attitude, which might be your sign to intervene to prevent their emotions from placing the negotiation in danger.

 

Controlling Emotional Flow

Savvy negotiators understand the power contained in controlling the emotions that flow during a negotiation. Thus, like an orchestra director, they seek to harmonize the talk to be pitch-perfect when such serves their needs. They’re also aware that tension in certain situations can create compliance. Thus, they engage in the sense of steadiness between having the most meaningful of emotions at the proper position at the appropriate time. Observe the following when attempting to control the emotional flow in your negotiation.

 

Course Correction

Every negotiation has course corrections. It’s in the form of accepting and rejecting offers and counteroffers. And during that process, talks can become vulnerable to emotional outbursts that lead to dangerous consequences.

Thus, you should pick an appropriate point in the negotiation to engage in a course correction. Such aspects might occur when the negotiators are tired, or when it’s time to eat. It can happen at any moment in which you can create an excuse to exit the negotiation for a break. What you’re seeking is a way to disrupt the events that are causing negativity to flow. By exiting the environment that’s causing tempers to create stress, you alleviate the source of the tension. Once you reassemble, do so with a pleasant demeanor in the atmosphere.

 

Reflection

Every negotiator displays emotions when they negotiate. Good negotiators use tactics, such as those mentioned, to control their emotions and those of the other negotiators. Once you become adept at utilizing the strategies mentioned, you’ll be in greater control of all of your negotiations. And everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Emotions #csuitenetwork #thoughtcouncil #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Bodylanguage #readingbodylanguage #Negotiation #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #negotiationPsychology #HowToNegotiateBetter #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Control #Conversations #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

Categories
Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“Do You Know How To Easily Win More Negotiations” – Negotiation Insight

“Everyone believes negotiations are easy until one becomes difficult.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

 Click here to get the book!

“Do You Know How To Easily Win More Negotiations”don’t realize; they’re always negotiating.

That was one of the easiest negotiations we’ve had. Yeah, especially when you compare it to the one two weeks ago, when a member of the opposing team insulted me by referring to my mother as a female dog. I wish all of our negotiations were as easy as the one today. That was the exchange between two negotiation teammates, as they reflected on the talks they’d just concluded.

Some negotiations are more laid back, relaxed, and comfortable than others, due to several factors. The following information will allow you to control a discussion better by understanding the variables that shape its flow. The insights you’ll gain will give you the tools needed to shift gears quickly in a negotiation when such is required.

 

Assessment

 

The first step towards a successful negotiation is understanding the variables that shape your bargaining session. Such variables as the perceived value of what you’re negotiating, the negotiation style of the other negotiator, the allotted time, body language displayed, and how both of you address possible impasses, will impact your engagement.

Thus, the outcome will be determined by how you approach those variables and how adaptable you are during the negotiation. Do it right, and you’ll have more of a haggle-free interaction. Do it wrong, and your talks will become fraught with drama, dismay, and impasses that’ll lead to a dead-end outcome.

 

Variables To Consider

 

  1. Allotted Time

The time set aside for the negotiation is a factor to consider seriously. Because it impacts the actions that negotiators will engage in as time begins to run out. And thus, not only will it affect the mentality of the negotiators, it could become the factor that determines when people start to negotiate in earnest, along with the source of stress that can lead a negotiation to impasses.

 

  1. Peak Performance Time

Everyone has peak times when they’re most alert, creative, and productive. And that’s the time you should negotiate. It’s even more important to do that when you’re at critical points in the negotiation. To maximize peak time performance, attempt to uncover the other negotiator’s peak performance times, too. With that information, you can attempt to negotiate when he’s off his peak, and you’re on yours. Having discussions during his off-peak periods will give you an added advantage because he won’t be as alert.

 

  1. Opponent’s Variables – Consider:
  • How much leeway does he have without having to consult someone else?
  • To whom must he prove himself that may not be at the negotiation table?
  • What horrors must he avoid, at all costs in the talks, to make the outcome a win for him?

The insights gained from the answers to those questions will illuminate the degree of self-power he has in the negotiation, and how you might control him as the result of knowing his limitations.

 

  1. Style of Negotiators

Negotiators use different approaches in a negotiation. And their attitude determines if they’ll play the part of someone tough or easy. With those less knowledgeable about negotiations, they may haphazardly enter a talk unaware of the persona they’re about to engage. And that puts them at a disadvantage.

 

Always attempt to understand the mindset of the person with whom you’re negotiating. By recognizing his mental makeup, you’ll have more insights into how he thinks. That’ll allow you to predict somewhat how he might act to offers you make, based on how you present them.

 

  1. Style of Negotiation

Every negotiation has a particular flow and style to it. You can attribute that to the characteristics of those involved in the talks. Accordingly, you should note the ebb and flow of all of your negotiations. For one, it affects how you’ll engage in future discussions. And it’ll give you feedback about how to make a session easier to participate in, in the future.

 

  1. Timing of Choices/Offers/Counteroffers

Be mindful of your choices, along with the offers and counteroffers you extend. The value and perception of your offerings are explicitly tied to when you make them. Therefore, always consider the impact that an offer will have on the ones that will follow.

 

  1. Order of Offers

To give the appearance of an offer being more valuable, first, position it. You’d do that by making your introductory offer less appealing than the present one. Be mindful when adopting this approach. If the other negotiator senses you’re making better offers as the result of him rejecting them, he may hold off on committing until he believes he’s heard your best offer.

You can also increase the perception of an offer by taking it off the table. The ‘takeaway’ is a powerful motivator. Because once someone embraces a proposition, that person doesn’t want to lose it.

 

Body Language

There’s an abundance of information conveyed through someone’s body language. That information entails what a person says and what they do. Thus, it would help if you always were observant about why a person uses their body in the manner you witness. What you observe are signals indicating what’s going on inside their mind. The following are a few signals to note.

  1. Mood – When someone’s mood shifts, it’s caused by a sensation they experience. That may be due to them reflecting on your offer, wondering if they should have made a different offer or a feeling that they’re not where they want to be in the negotiation. When you see someone’s mood shift, if it’s not to your liking, question them about what has happened. Better to address it then than allow it to be the cause that disrupts the negotiation later.
  2. Hand movement – What someone does with their hands can be one of the most revealing aspects of their inner thoughts. If they cover an eye, rub an ear, put their hands in their pockets, those could be signals that they’re less committed to what you’re discussing, versus what they may say verbally. As is true when reading body language signals, you must first observe how someone uses gestures before you can accurately identify why they displayed them at a particular time. And it would be best if you watched the cluster of their actions. One action alone is not definitive to what they’re thinking.

 

Reflection

Negotiations can be as easy or difficult as the parties involved chose to make them. By arming yourself with the information mentioned, you’ll become positioned better to engage in your negotiations from a position of strength and control. And everything will be right with the world.

 

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Negotiations #csuitenetwork #thoughtcouncil #Bodylanguage #readingbodylanguage #Negotiation #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #negotiationPsychology #HowToNegotiateBetter #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Control #Conversations #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

Categories
Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“How To Overcome Hidden Secrets Of The Leader’s Body Language” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“Secrets reveal themselves, but not until you uncover them.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

Click here to get the book!

“How To Overcome Hidden Secrets Of The Leader’s Body Language”

 

People don’t realize; they’re always negotiating.

 

All leaders have secrets. And all leaders reveal their secrets through their body language. But when it comes to leaders, it may be more challenging to understand the signals they emit. That’s because some leaders are more comfortable displaying certain body language gestures. And even when they’re not as forthright as their words proclaim, they may appear so at ease that their gestures emit little insight about their secret thoughts. It’s the lack of inner emotions that can prevent their real feelings from being displayed.

Nevertheless, there are ways to discern what’s occurring in the mind of a leader. It may be a little more challenging, but you can uncover a leader’s thoughts through his body language. The following information is a road map to overcome the hidden secrets that some leaders would rather you not know.

 

Leader Types

Before assessing how to overcome a leader’s hidden secrets, you must understand the type of leader you’re evaluating. In some cases, depending on his leadership abilities, he’ll display his confidence through different body language gestures. Note the following three categories as examples.

 

  • Unsure Leader

A leader that’s unsure of himself, or the position he wishes others to adopt, may tend to make smaller body language gestures when he’s communicating. Thus, when you see such signs, consider whether the individual lacks self-confidence per what he’s saying, or if he’s attempting to conceal points that he doesn’t wish to have revealed. In either case, the reason he displays close body language gestures is due to him not feeling overly comfortable.

 

  • Leader Exploring His Power

The leader exploring his power can be one that’s acquired a new position, or someone attempting to fill the void of authority. In either case, this individual type might show broad and sweeping gestures as he initially begins to communicate. You’ll note the degree of comfortability he has with his power when someone seriously challenges him. At that point, take note as to whether his gestures become smaller and more tightly controlled. That’ll be an indication he’s attempting to protect himself – from what is the question that should come to your mind.

 

  • Confident Leader

A confident leader displays open gestures (i.e., hands apart, palms up, smiling, etc.) when delivering news he believes is right for his followers. He may even have his jacket off, or sleeves rolled up to enhance his persona. And even when he has to deliver bad news, he won’t cloak it in tightly controlled actions that make him appear different than his typical displays. His movements may become minimized to align with the circumstances at hand, but they won’t alter to the degree that you sense he’s adopted a completely different personality type. Thus, when you sense a drastic departure from his typical body language displays, that’s when you should become concerned that he might be concealing secrets.

 

Disassociated Rhythm

When people speak earnestly, they do so with their hand movements to the rhythm of their words. And since by nature, leaders are in the eyes of those they lead, they’re adept at having their words and body language gestures synchronized. Thus, when they want to make a strong point, it’ll usually be noted through the gesture of a fist pounding downward, or a pointing finger that denotes direction.

Therefore, when such signs are missing, note it. And, when a leader speaks, observe the tonality he uses when delivering his message. Words convey conviction, but it’s the emotions layered over those words that allow his commitment to be felt by those consuming his message.

 

Signs of Stress

You may recall a member of the opposing party offering a rebuttal to the State of the Union message delivered by the U.S. President. As that member was speaking, he reached for a bottle of water several times to quench and soothe his throat. Even when the water was slightly out of reach, he awkwardly extended his hand far enough to grasp the bottle. At a minimum, it appeared abnormal. And that awkward body language reaching gesture, along with others, even though this was a seasoned political professional, revealed his nervousness (e.g., https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dWkjVvoXIS0 ). Two giveaways made that announcement.

The first giveaway was him realizing that he should not step away as he did. The member’s attempt to maintain eye contact with the camera noted that. Thus, he attempted to retain his position while awkwardly reaching for the bottle and trying to maintain camera eye contact. He didn’t accomplish that goal, so he stepped away momentarily. That only served to enhance his anxiety.

His second giveaway was the amount of water he drank. He reached for water several times throughout his rebuttal, with each occurrence being the announcer of his discomfort.

When one’s throat becomes constricted, it’s a sign of stress – you saw that in the politician’s body language. And in that case, the water served as a soother for his throat and to ease his nervousness. Thus, observing when a leader’s throat becomes constricted is one way he discloses his nervousness. And that’s a sign worth noting to uncover the secrets that he may wish to conceal.

 

Reflection

Depending on the circumstances, all leaders conceal secrets from their followers. In some situations, concealment may be due to the time the leader needs to formulate a plan. At other times, the leader may require time to implement nefarious acts to enact against his followers. Therefore, the better you are at discerning the body language gestures a leader exhibits in different situations, the more insight you’ll have as to when he’s hiding secrets versus when he’s secretive for secret sake. In either case, you’ll have a secret gateway that reveals what’s really behind his words. And everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Secrets #Leaders #csuitenetwork #thoughtcouncil #Bodylanguage #readingbodylanguage #Negotiation #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #negotiationPsychology #HowToNegotiateBetter #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Control #Conversations #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

Categories
Entrepreneurship Negotiations Operations Skills Women In Business

“Trust Is The Most Important Factor In A Negotiation” – Negotiation Insight

“Without trust, the factor of truth becomes inconsistent.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

“Trust Is The Most Important Factor In A Negotiation”

 

People don’t realize; they’re always negotiating.

As the negotiation began, it was open and respectful. The two negotiators engaged with the honest intent of reaching an outcome that both parties could embrace. In part, the interaction was calm because the two negotiators were friends, and they had a high degree of trust for one another. Little did they know, within two weeks, their deal would unravel. It would be due to a factor that would strain the negotiator’s friendship going forward. And it would raise doubts about how they could trust one another in the future. The factor that threatened their future relationship was born out of a third party’s actions. Someone that wasn’t involved in the initial negotiation. The following is how you can protect yourself from having this happen to you.

 

Memorialize Agreement

When capturing the covenant of a negotiated agreement, do it as close to the party’s settlement as possible. Even if best of friends say, “we can do this deal on a handshake,” memorialize it. At best, you’ll have an audit trail of the agreed outcome. At worse, the documentation can serve as a guide to reinitiate negotiations.

In either case, no matter with whom you negotiate, document the understanding of what the parties are to do next. The document will be your roadmap. It can also be a factor that provides insights to draw upon for your future negotiations with others.

 

Consider How Your Deal Might Unravel

Question – when do you have a problem? Answer – at the problem’s inception. Question – when does a problem’s inception occur? Answer – when you’re made aware of it.

One moment, you have a deal, and then the next moment you don’t. The best deals can fall apart when it’s time to produce the results of the agreement. And agreements are most vulnerable between the period of understanding the deliverables and delivering them. And, many factors can play a role in disrupting what the negotiators agreed upon as an outcome. Factors such as trust can wreak havoc on a negotiated transaction (i.e., I wonder if the other negotiator will deliver what we agreed, third parties, etc.)

To guard your deal against unraveling, don’t become complacent while waiting for the deliverable of the agreement to occur. If you do, you may find yourself waiting for a disaster. Be proactive by reaching out to the other party. Ask if everything is on schedule. And question if there are any negative occurrences on the horizon that might affect the deal, etc.. What you’re seeking are signs that the deal might be coming apart.

Some negotiators think you run the risk of inviting the other party to renegotiate the deal when you ask if it is still on target. But, if the agreement is in the process of failing, you’re already in a renegotiation state. You’re just not aware of it.

Don’t wait for a problem to come to you. Go to it and address it on your terms. You’ll have more leverage in doing so because you’ll have greater control of it at that time.

 

Sounds of Broken Trust

If you listen intently when a negotiator speaks, you can hear the sounds he makes as he’s breaking trust. Those sounds will be in the form of the words he uses to explain why he can no longer commit to the deal. He may say things like, “I didn’t remember agreeing to that. Or, I thought you meant something else.” Regardless of the excuse, the documented agreement can serve as a refresher of what the two of you agreed.

In the situation mentioned in the opening, the third party that injected himself into the negotiation stated that the negotiator whose side he was on didn’t recall agreeing to the covenants that were specified. With that, he pushed the talks back to the two friends. That maneuver created angst in the partner of the third party.

The person negotiating without a partner noticed the quickness with which the third party wanted to conclude the conversation with him. And that set off a silent alarm. At that point, the lone negotiator suspected his friend would be breaking the trust they’d established about their agreement. That was confirmed when his friend offered a new deal. When asked what occurred with the prior arrangement, the response was a jumble of apologies. The lone negotiator’s regret was, he wished he’d recognized the sounds of broken trust sooner. That would have given him more time to salvage a deal that had already gone astray.

 

The Price of Broken Trust

No matter your environment, be it in a negotiation or a friendly exchange of information, when there’s a trust void, caution is at hand. And when people are cautious, they’re more measured with their thoughts and actions. Plus, broken trust can belabor a future negotiation due to the negotiators wondering when the other might break trust again. Accordingly, they’ll make offers and counteroffers tenuously, which will hinder the pace of the negotiation.

Always be aware that there’s a cost when you abandon trust. The best way to address that mindfulness is to heighten your awareness about what you agree to, and being willing to live with your agreement. Trust is a precious commodity. And thus, it something to be cherished.

 

Reflection

The two friends renegotiated a new deal because the lone negotiator wanted his friend to experience the win he was seeking. But what the third party and the other negotiator didn’t realize was the lone negotiator had a factor that would test their trust in the future. He thought a win is a win until it’s no longer a win. And since he knew that you’re always negotiating, he planned to reopen the negotiation in six months. You see, when trust is orphaned, it can become adopted by the person that embraces it, which enhances that person’s appeal. And everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Trust #Factor #csuitenetwork #thoughtcouncil #Bodylanguage #readingbodylanguage #Negotiation #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #negotiationPsychology #HowToNegotiateBetter #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Control #Conversations #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

Categories
Growth Management Personal Development Women In Business

Take the Time to Do It Right: There are No Shortcuts to Success!

The Fourth Step of the Faremouth Method is “Take The Time To Do It Right.”   In times of uncertainty and change, some may feel compelled to take short cuts.  Short cuts may seem to be the easiest way to get from one point to another but there will always be a price to be paid in that process.  The fear of the unknown might lead some to sacrifice their own morality for a perceived favorable outcome but, even that, creates more fear of the truth rearing its ugly head at a later time.  The truth will be exposed when you least expect it.

 

One of the ancient teachings by Buddha emphasizes three things which cannot be long hidden – the Sun, the Moon, and the Truth.  In other words, we must always continue to uphold our integrity.  Specifically, when looking for a job in these challenging times during the pandemic, integrity and honesty are non-negotiable.

 

This brings me to a real situation that happened just the other day.  I had been on a search assignment for one of my clients that involved a very specific skill set and background.  I came upon a resume that seemed to be “right on.”  The candidate had the exact skillset and tenure that the client required.  I did a video interview, which is now replacing the in-person interview, and the candidate seemed to really resonate with all the requirements and more.  The “more” part was the interesting twist in the scenario because, as I later found out, there was for sure more to the story.

 

After my preliminary findings, I sent the resume to the client and they reviewed and decided to interview the person for this job.  I then advised the candidate of the day and time requested, etc.  He agreed, and, at that point, decided to inform me he would send me an updated resume.  Being perplexed, I asked if he had taken a very short temp job.  His response was to let me just review the resume when received.

 

Upon receiving the resume, I noticed there were some major discrepancies from the initial resume that had been submitted.  I immediately called the applicant to discuss the differences on the resume and after a back and forth discussion, he confessed the reason for expanding the truth on the resume was out of fear.  Fear of not getting an interview if his real situation was revealed.

 

Unfortunately, when then submitting the updated resume, which I felt compelled to do, the client declined to interview the candidate.  No matter what the truth is, your resume must reflect the truth. By admitting your truth or stretching it, you could eventually cost yourself the job offer and respect.

 

The unfortunate part, however, is that if he would have taken the time to do it right, and presented the situation honestly, he would have had a better opportunity to get the interview and possibly a job offer.  The choices we all have to make, whether during or in the absence of the pandemic, have to be aligned with integrity.  In fact, integrity may be more important now than ever due to the enormous competition out there.  Employers are really looking for people they can trust, rely upon, and count on in these very uncertain times.  They are looking at everything under a microscope these days.  Knowing that might inspire one to become their best self and deal with challenges of the past in a new and innovative way.  It never pays to present a work history or details as to why you left a particular employment which is inaccurate.

 

In some cases, even, if a candidate is uncertain of how to present a challenging situation in their work history, it might behoove them to get the advice of a mentor, career counselor, or friend to know how to present it in an honest and truthful way.  At the same time, a challenging situation can be presented in a way that will shed a positive light and have the common denominator of the experience be laced with honesty and integrity.

 

Personal courage is not the absence of fear.  It is the ability to put fear aside and do what is necessary.  Courage takes two forms, physical and moral.  Physical courage is overcoming fears of bodily harm which we can all relate to with Covid-19.  Moral courage is a willingness to stand firm on values, principles, and convictions and to stand up for what you believe to be right, regardless of the consequences.  Allow your own personal light and compass to always shine on the real truth of who you are rather than what you want your story to be.

Categories
Growth Management Personal Development Women In Business

Asking Better Questions to Prepare for the New Work World

Becoming our best self is a life-long process.  Sometimes that journey is filled with many twists and turns along the way.  The thought occurred to me as to how we can expand and grow after the pandemic.  So often during our life, we are ruled by a fear of failure, disappointment, facing rejection, etc.  JK Rowling once wrote something like, “you will never truly know yourself or your strength until tested by adversity.”  It is only when our lives become challenging that we see how strong we truly are.

 

As we prepare for this new journey, we find that by asking better questions now will give you the time to prepare honest responses to ensure better results as well as educate yourself to secure a better job offer in the future. The world will eventually evolve to a “new normal” and, when it does, you need to do all you can to be able to compete in this post-pandemic world.

 

In the New Work World, if you are serious about securing a job or making a career shift, you will have to “put the pedal to the metal” to be proactive and make a strong commitment to being able to stand out above the competition.  As with any great setback in life, the real winners are those who have resilience and perseverance.  You really do have choices as to how you respond and dedicate your energies to create new opportunities for yourself.

 

The new prospective employer will not tolerate why your resume has formatting issues, why your references won’t return a call, why your LinkedIn profile is not up-to-date and professional, why you have been too stressed out with fear of Covid19, family, kids, etc.  These issues and attitudes could very well cost you the job offer later.

 

Asking Better Questions might allow you to look more appealing than the candidate with more experience who DID NOT prepare.  Doing a proper evaluation of yourself will better prepare you when you are competing for the same job with others who may be more qualified than you. Employers will be looking for a candidate with that something extra as they determine the best applicant for the job.  You can turn this into a time of reinventing yourself through discovery. Discovery will come about because of your self-analysis in preparation for re-entering the New Work World.  History has shown that gain can come out of destruction. The Phoenix will rise from the ashes.  It’s important to remember that not only are you, the applicant, going through a new learning curve on how to approach securing a new job, so are companies and employers. The qualities they are seeking are also changing.

 

Some things to consider are as follows:

 

  1. Do a realistic self-analysis to document your skills and weaknesses related to your job and desire to secure a new career.  Identify your strengths and weaknesses.
  2. Do research to target a new job or industry which will perhaps be more profitable and secure than the one you currently have or came from.
  3. Contact previous bosses, if you are NOT currently unemployed, of course, to secure reference letters, inform them of a possible prospective employer calling, and expressing gratitude for them taking the time out of their day to answer any questions about your past work performance.
  4. When asked why you might have been laid off, terminated, or furloughed in this pandemic, how will you explain? Remember to express gratitude for the experience, reserve any hard feelings about the loss of your unemployment, and omit any negative talk about a particular industry, boss or co-worker.
  5. Analyze your monthly household living expenses to see if there are ways to cut back so that you are not working for just a paycheck. You want to find employment that is going to satisfy your passion and utilize your skills. It can be worth taking a step back for perhaps a giant step forward.  Have you examined your realistic worth in the current market place?
  6. Clean up ALL SOCIAL MEDIA content. This is more important than you might imagine.  Your LinkedIn profile and social media pages should be professional.  Make sure all your content does not contain anything inappropriate.
  7. Find a trusted mentor, friend, previous boss, or family member who you can lean on for support when the stress of your job search becomes overwhelming.
  8. Engage in mindfulness techniques such as YOGA, meditation, prayer, or visualization to help you get centered and calm down during this process of seeking new employment in the New Work World.
  9. Make time to exercise, relax, and involve yourself in hobbies that you might enjoy and have something fun in your life.

 

This transformational time can be used as a very important step by re-introducing ourselves to the world as our mask is removed, and we are much more in touch with who we are and what we have to offer the world to make it a better place. We are truly finding our place within that new work world and our own world as we emerge a much better version of who we had been. In the process, we may find that our new life is better than the one we left behind.

Categories
Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“This Is How To Win Comparisons In The Negotiation” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“The value of what you compare lies in the value of what you’re comparing.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

“This Is How To Win Comparisons In The Negotiation”

 

People don’t realize; they’re always negotiating.

 

When people evaluate situations, they may not realize it, but they’re making comparisons. About that, you should raise your level of consciousness; because it’s a truism. In some instances, people compare a present situation to the ones that appear related to prior cases. At other times, they compare the current condition to the possibility of future outcomes. And that’s especially true during a negotiation. Regardless of the timeframe, when making comparisons, you’re evaluating the course of action to take. Thus, in your negotiation and other aspects of your life, when making comparisons, be aware of the impact that the following factors have on the outcome.

 

Listening

An intricate part of good communications in a negotiation, and other interactions, is the ability to listen well. To understand someone’s perspective, first, you must listen to what they say about the situation that’s before them. That’ll give you a mental picture of that person’s perception, and the opinion they have about it. That’ll also be the insight source that determines which comparisons to draw from later in the conversation.

If you’re astute, you’ll listen to the words they use to express themselves, the degree of excitement they share while doing so, and the pace at which they speak – word choice gives vision to someone’s thoughts. Thus, by being attentive to their word choices, you’ll gain a more profound sense of their emotional mind. And that’s the reason why you should listen for a deeper meaning than just the conveyance of their words. To do that, you must give that person the time and space they need to let their feelings be known, heard, and shared.

 

Tension/Apprehension

While you’re actively listening, note the comparisons someone makes while they’re speaking. In particular, observe the points about the tensions or apprehensions they’ve encountered. That’ll give you more clues about the pain they’ve experienced. Later, you’ll be able to employ that information as anchoring points of negativity or positivity during the negotiation.

Most people are moved to action by fear of loss, versus gaining something they don’t currently possess. Thus, if you hear someone speak about protecting what they have, catalog it for later use. At the appropriate time, make a comparison to a situation in which they lose something they have. Then, create a worse condition scenario than the first one. After that, offer your solution as the savior of their woes. By initially making comparisons to a bad situation and one that’s worse, your best-case offering will appear more pleasing, and more likely to be accepted.

 

Anchoring

Anchoring occurs when you set someone’s initial point of perspective. Thus, if someone said your price was too high, you might ask, compared to what? In their response would be the answer to what they were comparing your price. And there’d be gold in their reply. Because they will have given you their anchoring point about why they thought your price was high.

At that point, you’ll have a momentary advantage in the negotiation. That advantage will be in the form of thoughts, ideas, and positions from which to find a medium point. You might consider evoking some of the points you gathered while listening to the tensions and apprehensions that individual had in the past. Or, if warranted, you might instead employ something from the positive aspects of which they spoke.

The point is, you should seek to anchor that person’s perspective to the point that will best serve your purpose. In theory, that would be a position that was best for both of you. That would allow the perception of your point to become embraced as being more solvable to the challenge at hand. And that would mean your anchoring point would become accepted as an influencer to the proceeding that follows from there. Anchoring is a powerful tool when it comes to influencing someone’s views. Use it adroitly, and you’ll enhance your negotiation efforts.

 

Storytelling

The stories you tell are another factor that’ll serve as your ally when making comparisons in a negotiation. A well-told story injected into the conversation at the right time, can instantly alter someone’s position and the perspective they have about a situation. To tell a good story, consider the following components.

 

  1. When telling a person how he can acquire a goal that you see as obtainable, the story should have easily recognized components that the person perceives as being real, and not too difficult to achieve. Allow him to see himself bursting with new pride in the imagery of his new acquisition.

 

  1. Paint the mental picture you project with details you gleaned during the listening part of your interaction. Thus, if the person spoke about a dire time when he missed the chance to improve or maintain a situation, due to moving slowly, you might paint the image of someone being overly deliberate and missing an opportunity. Let him draw his conclusion between that situation and the position that he’s currently in.

 

  1. The timing and pace you tell a story will determine its impact. Therefore, to enhance the effect, recite your story’s depiction at a pace that’s easy to follow and consume. While doing so, observe the body language displayed by the person listening to it. In particular, note when they close their eyes, turn or drop their head, or show a momentary frown, as you mention what they may lose if they don’t act fast enough. The body language gestures mentioned will indicate a fear of loss. Cues such as those will announce the impact your story is having on that individual.

 

Reflection

First, realize that during your interactions with other people, you’re negotiating. And in a negotiation, you move someone’s perspective by the comparisons you make and the way you position those comparisons. Therefore, if you wish to win more negotiations when using comparisons, seek to evoke the level of emotions, positive or negative, in which you touch someone’s heart. Following these guidelines will allow you to do just that. And everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Comparisons #csuitenetwork #thoughtcouncil #Bodylanguage #readingbodylanguage #Negotiation #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #negotiationPsychology #HowToNegotiateBetter #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Control #Conversations #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself