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How to Really Overcome a Bully Before Negotiating

“A bully is a misguided person with perceived power. Extinguish his sources of power and you extinguish the bully.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Do you know how to really overcome a bully before negotiating with him? There you are. You’re negotiating against a bully! He’s someone that’s willing to lie, cheat, and steal to come out ahead in the negotiation. You think to yourself, ‘what can I do? This son-of-a-gun is not playing fair and I don’t know how to overcome him!’ The answer to, ‘what can I do’ was hidden in what occurred before the negotiation began.

The following insights will allow you to position yourself better to overcome a bully’s ploys before you negotiate with him.

Positioning:

In every negotiation, positioning occurs. It’s shown in the way the negotiators perceive each other and themselves. Thus, positioning is important because it determines how negotiators will interact with one another.

If you know you’ll be negotiating against someone that has bullied others in the past, before entering into the negotiation, attempt to discover the demeanor of those individuals. In particular seek to define whether they were perceived to be weak by your opponent due to their short-comings, or if your opponent felt empowered due to some other factor(s) he had going for himself at the time of the negotiation(s). That information will allow you to best position yourself from a position of strength. A bully’s loathing for weakness is the reason he only picks on targets that he perceives to be weak.

Leverage: (ploys you can employ when negotiating with a bully)

  • Using Other people
    • All bullies look up to someone. If you can find a way to curry favor with the bully’s icon, you can supplant his bullying efforts against you. After all, the bully wants an easy target. If the bully’s icon has favored you, that makes you less of a target to the bully.
  • Bully’s weakness
    • All bullies have an Achilles heel. It may be how they wish to be perceived by others. It may also appear in the form of the bully being perceived in one light versus another. Whatever it is, discover it and be prepared to exploit it during the negotiation if such is called for.
  • Bully’s Persona (his vanity)
    • If you’re aware of the pride a bully takes in having himself perceived in a certain light, attempt to alter that light; have it shine on someone or somewhere else. You will have taken away his source of motivation. Hold it hostage until he dismantles his bullying ways. The point is, hit him where you’ll get the most attention and where it will hurt him the most. Remember, he despises weakness and applauds strength.

Be Stealthy:

Every good negotiator gathers information about the opposing negotiator. When you know you’ll be negotiating against a bully, drip misinformation into places that he seeks to gather information about you. The better you can use such information to misguide him, the more difficult it’ll be for him to assess the type of negotiator you are; always be willing to display a different negotiation demeanor based on the opposing negotiator.

When engaging a bully in a negotiation, there are all kinds of mind games that occur. Utilize the insights above and you’ll be in a better mental state than the bully. The better you play the game, the greater the chance that you’ll be able to overcome a bully when negotiating … and everything will be right with the world.

What are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

#HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #Bully

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Accounting Best Practices Economics Entrepreneurship Health and Wellness Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Skills Women In Business

Life is Always Testing You; A Negotiation Inspirational Insight

“Tests are meant to measure your improvement. Life’s tests are meant to improve you!” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“Life is Always Testing You”

“This is a test. For the next 60 seconds …”

“Fear not the passing of time. Fear instead your lack of ability to use the gifts that time gives you.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Life is always testing us and thus, life is always a test. Be thankful for that because it means that you’re alive, with the ability to go higher in life.

We plan for one thing and something else happens. We set our expectations upon what we’ve planned for and life zags when we thought it was going to zig. At times, it can drive you nuts! But, you shouldn’t let it. Consider it as just another test that life is putting before you; it’s doing so to make you stronger. It’s doing so to see how quickly you can adapt to unexpected occurrences. To the degree that you don’t let such occurrences create mental angst within you, you’ll become infused with more resiliency in life, for your life. That can serve as a source of motivation to fortify your mental attitude and enhance your aptitude to achieve more in life.

The way we perceive and interpret what occurs in our life determines how we’ll adapt to those occurrences and how well we interact with them. Thus, if you view an occurrence from the perspective that it’s a test from which you can improve your abilities, the new/altered occurrence from what you expected can be viewed in a more positive light. That positive perspective should allow you to deal with the unplanned, unexpected occurrence easier and with less apprehension.

When something doesn’t serve you, don’t let it disserve you a second time. Occurrences will come to you from many different sources. Let the positive things that come from such sources support you. For those that detract from you and your goals, be thankful for their insights as you say goodbye to them, knowing that they too add value to your life.

Once you look at your life’s occurrences as being a value-add to your life, you will have adopted a mindset of openness, acceptance, and a mental state of ease. Once you do that … everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

Negotiations are fraught with occurrences that challenged your preconceived plans based on the plans you assembled for the negotiation. Again, to the degree you’re flexible in the flow of the negotiation and you’re adaptable to the changing flow that occurs in/during it, the better a grip you’ll have on determining its outcome. That means you should manage your emotional state during the negotiation, constantly be thinking of any hidden meanings in unspoken and spoken words and any additional insight that body language gestures convey. That assembly of insights will make you a more formattable negotiator, which will lead to better negotiation outcomes for you.

What are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to  sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

#HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #Lifetest

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Management Marketing Personal Development

The Decision Process IS the Product!

Your decisions are the result of the decision-making process you employ to make them.  Let me illustrate using a story.

When my kids were growing up, we had a family tradition of going out dinner every Sunday night. My wife and I were both great cooks. While it was easy to eat well at home, the dedicated — OK, captive — family time in a restaurant setting was great for connecting with each other, and started the coming week on a great footing.

For the first few years of this tradition, the process of picking a restaurant went like this: as we were driving out of the church parking lot, discussions – actually a low-intensity argument – would start. Options were proposed and rejected by one or more family members in what seemed like an hours-long process of consensus-building. The product of this process: about 95% of the time, we ended up at Chili’s. That was the only option that could survive that process/ discussion gauntlet relatively unscathed. We all knew we were in a rut, but every time we tried to propose options, the process we used directed us back to the same place. Our “variety” became “table or booth?”. Chili’s is a great place, which is why it made the cut so consistently, but…sheesh.

Same Program, Same People, Wildly Different Results

Then somebody had the great idea to change the process. Each week, one of us got their turn to pick the restaurant for the family. The oldest, in high school at the time, introduced us one week to the Mexican dive hangout he learned about from friends. Our kids were introduced to sushi, Greek, Thai, seafood and more – and loved every single one. My youngest developed a love for the culinary arts – I’m positive in part, due to his wide exposure. I can’t remember a single flop; we almost always walked out of a family meal happy about a new experience. We repeated a few of the big hits (usually at the request of somebody other than the original “chooser”), but the variety and quality of the choices when way up. Importantly, every single one of us agreed that they loved the new results better every. single. week.

Here’s the lesson: the people – the Buying Influences — involved in this decision didn’t change: same personalities, same preferences, same budget, same geographic constraints, same everything. Yet, we achieved far different, far better results.

If you are a Sales Professional:

How groups choose drives what they choose. Consumers choose different decision processes or heuristics. You can guide them to use different heuristics within reason.  They’ll easily choose from a short list of processes they’ve used in the past, for instance. Groups of people organize decisions in certain ways, and often default to the same process they used most recently even if the results were less-than-ideal.

Complex selling is a consensus sale among a group of humans making a group decision… much like my family’s restaurant selection decision. High-performing sellers become students of the group dynamic, and harness different group decision-making processes in order to optimize results. You can add critical players, propose new processes yourself, get coaching to help shape decisions from within the group, and even work within formal processes like RFPs and bids to optimize your chances of success.

If you are a Sales Leader or a Business leader:

Understand how process used determines the outcome achieved.

If you don’t like the product, you may not need to change the people or other resources. To change results, look at your processes. Great leaders become students of group decision-making, and learn how process affects product.

On making decisions: look at your decision process. The way you facilitate each decision shapes it. The process you and your team uses to make a decision indelibly shapes the product – the outcome — of the decision.   If you don’t know how the process you imposed is affecting that decision, you’re either blindly replicating old decisions (for better or worse) and hoping for better results this time…or relying on luck.

On looking at your Processes: Don’t kid yourself about what you already have. In my sales performance consulting practice, I help customers change selling processes. The clients who initially think they don’t have a process are wrong. They have a process, even if it’s just an “everyone does what they want” process. That’s why changing it is hard (it would be a lot easier if “no process” really existed).

Feel free to comment below, or contact me directly. I offer tools to help sales professionals effectively and efficiently optimize customer processes, and love talking about them with new people. If I can help you guide your thinking on your own processes, I’m happy to share my thoughts.

To your success!

#sales, #salesprocess, #millerheiman, #millerheimangroup, #MHIglobal, #salesperformance, #customercentric, #process, #decisiondynamic

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Best Practices Health and Wellness Human Resources Management Marketing Skills Women In Business

When You’re Just Too Busy

We wear busy like a badge of honor. Busy has become a status symbol within our society, which is crazy when you stop to consider how terrible it is to our productivity, personal well-being and relationships. We believe if we aren’t busy, we aren’t productive.

Researchers have discovered people are feeling overwhelmed at work dealing with constant distractions that then spill over into our personal lives, affecting our recovery, families and friendships. The result: the feeling of anxiety, stress, fatigue and a lack of focus on what matters most.

The Centre for Time Use Research at Oxford University says the total amount of time people work is the same as it’s always been and data indicates people who say they’re the busiest generally aren’t.

Question is: If we aren’t actually busier than in the past, why do we feel like it?  

Part of the answer is simple – attention is our new currency and is more valuable than ever before. With a constant stream of incoming emails, meetings to attend, things to read, ideas to execute, it’s no wonder we feel unable to give our undivided attention to what is most important.  When you couple everything competing for our attention with the digital age of technology, it’s no wonder we are feeling overwhelmed, overstressed and overtired. Fact is: we work 24×7. We never get a break.

Technology and societal pressures leave us feeling the need to be accessible to everyone all the time. As a result, everything suffers. Ironically, being constantly accessible actually decreases our productivity, not the other way around. When we feel rushed, we actually suffer from decreased production, focus and attention to detail. The pace of which we work slows, we are more apt to make mistakes and more likely to disconnect from meaningful relationships.

When we are overwhelmed and lack concentrated focus, we inadvertently compile our stress by taking on even more obligations than we can handle. Before we know it, we are sacrificing what matters most to suffice what matters now. Even worse, we have preprogrammed ourselves to believe we must always be on, plugged in and responsive. We fail to give ourselves the necessary time to recover and refocus.

It’s time to change our mindset. It’s time for an Attention Revolution.  We must stop considering busy as an indication of our importance. We must measure our success not by the time it takes to complete a task, rather the results we achieve. It’s time to prioritize what matters most to us and use those priorities as filters for what we commit to doing. We must learn to say ‘no’ to requests for our time that steal our attention from what matters most. It’s time to start realizing the value our undivided attention brings to relationships, productivity and accountability.

Maybe then, we’ll see we aren’t as busy as we thought we were.

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Personal Development Women In Business

Are You a Thought Leader? Get Your Ideas the Attention They Deserve

Have you ever heard the term ‘Thought Leadership’ and wondered what it was and who gets to call themselves a ‘Thought Leader?’ True thought leaders shape and shift ideas, perspectives and focus in others.

Thought leaders don’t just know something, they are known for something. People often consider themselves Thought Leaders and yet are actually just thought repeaters. If you really want to stand out as a unique leader who drives passion and focus in others, you must know with conviction, or be willing to develop the skills that meet the following Thought Leadership criteria:

  • Within your business or corporation, you are the go-to resource that best represents your brand, idea and thoughts.
  • You can quickly strategize using thought leadership as a marketing strategy to operationalize your unique ideas.
  • Create ideas and information your business and department can capitalize on by sharing it with the world in a way that is unique and one-of-a-kind.

Utilizing your unique talent and ideas in Thought Leadership can help you inspire and develop top talent within your company. It can also help you attract and retain a larger client base with great connection, engagement and partnership with your brand.

Question is, once you’ve identified your inner thought leader, how can you share your insightfulness to those around you?

1. Capture what you know: You must take the ideas from your head and create ways to communicate them to the marketplace. Thought Leaders can be found in any existing field of work imaginable; however, having a thorough knowledge and unique insights into a topic is only the beginning. Document what you know, your intellectual property. Become a subject-matter expert with unique insights and perspectives to share in your area of expertise. Communicate them in a way that demonstrates value, with language that is uniquely yours.

2. Make your ideas known by others: Of equal importance is the Thought Leader’s ability to educate others on their ideas. It is critical to to share ideas in such a way that you inspire others to want to pass the information along to those in their inner circle. So, package your ideas in an accessible and attractive format to distribute to a market hungry for insights and solutions to problems, and those hearing your message will be eager to distribute it accordingly.

3. Communicate with other Thought Leaders: Communicate with other industry thought leaders, those that are shaking up the way their industry operates. Those with unique insights and ideas often value like-mindedness. They will embrace your approach and engage others willing to listen and learn.

4. Concentrate your messages to the markets that will value your expertise: Your ideas offered must be powerful enough to shift, or contribute to the future direction of an industry, community or even a whole way of thinking. If your thought leadership ideas focus on customer engagement, focus on developing relationships and creating connections with those whose interests concur. If technological ideas are what you’re known for, engage with other like-minded industry thinkers that will see the value in your message and understand the long-term impact your ideas will have.

Thought leadership is a unique skill set and way of packaging solutions to problems others may not consider. Once you’ve identified this talent within yourself, or developed the skills to be known for what you know, move forward with the communication strategy presented so you can spread your knowledge and ideas successfully.

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Entrepreneurship Health and Wellness Management Marketing Technology

Billionaire Naveen Jain Shares His Moon Shot

As part of my nationally syndicated radio show, Take the Lead, I interview top leaders and successful individuals who share their success stories. Naveen Jain, the billionaire behind Viome and Moon Express, sat down for a live interview with me.

To hear the entire interview, you can go to:  http://drdianehamilton.com/episodes and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Z0KVSnO9Ow&t=219s.

The following are highlights of what he discussed in our interview:

  • Going from being poor to becoming a billionaire is a mindset
  • Ask what can I do about a problem
  • What if energy becomes like oxygen and does not cost money
  • Abundance makes things demonetized
  • Half of the Fortune 500 companies will go bankrupt in next 15 years
  • The pace of disruption
  • What Uber has accomplished and what will happen to them
  • What is your moonshot and what is possible
  • Smaller problems are harder to solve then bigger ones
  • How to get to the point of landing on the moon
  • Don’t have a plan B as a crutch
  • How to create a billion-dollar company
  • Reason people buy products
  • Curing all disease
  • Better to get into industries with which you are not familiar
  • 70% of serotonin is produced in the gut and not the brain
  • Tony Robbins and Peter Diamandis and the Joe Polish Genius Network event
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Best Practices Human Resources Management Marketing Personal Development

Ken Fisher of Fisher Investments Discusses Leadership

As part of my nationally syndicated radio show, Take the Lead, I interview top leaders and successful individuals who share their success stories. Ken Fisher, the billionaire behind the success of Fisher Investments, sat down for a live interview with me. To hear the entire interview, you can go tohttp://drdianehamilton.com/episodes and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MDNSdlhM9cE&t=27s

The following are highlights of what he discussed in our interview:

  • Whether leaders are born or made
  • The importance of knowing yourself
  • What people will do vs. what they can do
  • Activity and attitude equals success
  • What his day is like
  • The key to success in life is wise choices, keen observations, and recognizing your observations are often wrong and modifying when they are wrong
  • The importance of degree programs
  • Universities like Harvard or Stanford are broken, and degrees are equivalent to a bad education in 1910
  • What he wants to hear from an interviewee
  • John Tamny’s article about the uselessness of patents
  • How the economy will change before and after an election
  • Trump vs. Clinton
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Investing Management Marketing Personal Development Technology

Crypto Currency Explained by Currency Expert

As part of my nationally syndicated radio show, Take the Lead, I interview top leaders and successful individuals who share their success stories. Bitcoin and cryptocurrency expert and CEO of FIREapps Wolfgang Koester, sat down for a live interview with me.  He was named as one of the “100 Most Influential People in Finance” and is regularly included in Global Finance’s annual “Who’s Who in Foreign Exchange”. To hear the entire interview, you can go tohttp://drdianehamilton.com/episodes and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wMm8R6WJObU&t=1105s.

The following are highlights of what he discussed in our interview:

  • What is crypto currency and Bitcoin
  • The security and traceability of crypto currency
  • Block chain technology or ledger technology and digital mining
  • Supply and demand of Bitcoin and why the price changes
  • 130 cryptocurrencies out there – creating a market for currency
  • How many crypto currencies there should or will be
  • Countries like Russia and others going with crypto currency soon
  • Chinese raise to beat others to become dominant currency and displace the dollar
  • Millennials interest in crypto currency
  • Criminal activity hiding transactions
  • Winklevoss Bitcoin marketers will never spend their money
  • How much is in circulation
  • Difficulty getting out of digital currency
  • Rules getting made up as we go and scamming
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Economics Management Marketing News and Politics Personal Development Technology

Dr. Diane Hamilton Interviews Steve Forbes

As part of my nationally syndicated radio show, Take the Lead, I interview top leaders and successful individuals who share their success stories.  Steve Forbes, the Chairman and Editor-in-Chief of Forbes Media, was a recent guest on my show.  He and I worked together when I was the MBA Program Chair at the Forbes School of Business and Technology.  To hear the entire interview, you can go to:  http://drdianehamilton.com/episodes. The following are highlights of what he discussed in our interview.

  • Whether leaders are born or made
  • Taking Forbes digital
  • His favorite people he has interviewed
  • Why he ran for the presidency
  • The biggest changes he has seen in politics during his life
  • Predictions for future markets and innovation
  • The three big reforms we need to address
  • The flat tax and whether we will ever see it
  • The Fed and what changes will we see
  • What to look for in employees
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Best Practices Human Resources Management Marketing Skills Women In Business

Embracing Generational Differences in the Workplace

To reduce conflict and improve productivity, it is important to understand generational issues, culture, emotional intelligence, and engagement.  Leaders are often frustrated by some of the conflict that stems from generational differences in the workplace.  For real progress, we must learn to share the things that we have in common and appreciate the things that we do not. Once we understand people’s preferences and perspectives, we can embrace multiple generations in the workplace.  To watch a recent speech I gave to a large group in Phoenix, regarding these important issues, please go to: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gh7WLNJ1O4o&feature=youtu.be

During that speech, I discussed:

  • Avoiding generational stereotyping
  • Embracing each generation as unique and important
  • Improving soft skills
  • Developing emotional intelligence
  • Improving engagement
  • Improving productivity and turnover
  • Embracing diversity
  • Reducing conflict