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Accountability: 3 Steps to Holding Yourself Accountable to Grow Your Influence

Click here to watch Accountability: 3 Steps to Holding Yourself Accountable to Grow Your Influence 

It’s not the skills and techniques you and your team learn that make you more influential.  It’s what you do with what you learn.

Accountability is the most difficult aspect of having influence Monday to Monday®.

This video will share with you three steps you can take today to avoid slipping into your old habits.  These three steps will keep you focused and disciplined to do the work of communicating with influence Monday to Monday® until it becomes ingrained in you. 

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Skills Women In Business

The Hidden Value of Trust in Negotiations

“The Hidden Value of Trust In A Negotiation (DACA)”

When someone trusts you in a negotiation (you’re always negotiating), they’re more likely to believe what you tell them. Thus, there’s hidden value in trust when negotiating from a long-term perspective. Once trust is broken it’s difficult to regain it. Therefore, broken trust sets off negative ripples that can have unintended and unexpected consequences in the future.

Let’s look at the trust factor with DACA (Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals) as an example. The kids in the DACA program were brought to the US by their parents. In most cases, they had no input as to whether they would stay where they were, or travel to the US. They instinctively trusted their parents with that decision. Then, there’s the US government.

The US government basically said, if you register for the DACA program and abide by our requirements (i.e. check in every 2 years and make payment to stay in the program, go to college, serve in the military, stay employed, pay taxes), you’ll be OK in the US.

Some registered and some didn’t. Those in the DACA program trusted the government and abided by their mandate. Then, trust was thrust out the window. Those in the DACA program cried, ‘We did what you asked of us! Why are you going back on your word? We trusted you!’ Those that did not register for the program, if not stated out loud silently thought, ‘see, I told you so; you should not have trusted them. The government can’t be trusted. Now, the information you gave them will be used against you.’ The ripple that such a message sent to non-DACA members was, stay in the shadows and let the darkness protect you.

In the eyes of those in the program, the US government went back on its word and broke the trust it had conveyed. Suffice it to say, the ripples set forth from this situation will cause the government not to be trusted in future matters by different entities. They’ll mentally relate their situation to the resemblance of the DACA plight. That means those submitting information requested by the government will be skeptical at best and cynical at worse when contemplating a course of action that they should adopt. In essence, through the loss of trust, the government has made it more difficult for others to trust it.

If I tell you the truth, will you believe what I say and trust me? If my perception of the truth is altered in the future, will I be declared a liar? If so, what will become of our future negotiation efforts? Those are questions every negotiator needs to consider before and during a negotiation. That’s the hidden force that trust has on a negotiation.

When trust is the foundation upon which a negotiation is built, the truth becomes a happier companion in the negotiation. Therefore, when the truth as one knows it shifts, the shifting of the truth can still have believability.

Change allows you to embrace new experiences, and everything changes. Thus, what’s true today may be proven not to be valid tomorrow. Nevertheless, once trust has been established and nurtured by consistency, over a period of time change can withstand the onslaught of doubt and suspension. In so doing, even when your negotiations become difficult, you’ll have less of a challenge finding a path to success, simply because you had trust adding hidden value to your negotiation … and everything will be right with the world.

What are your takeaways? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

 “Without trust, failure awaits you.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator and Body Language Expert

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Entrepreneurship Leadership Personal Development

Do You Love What You Do?

How do you know if you love what you do for a living?

It’s a simple question that seems straight-forward enough, but it’s not always easy to answer. Many people would instinctively say something like, “I just know” or “I can just feel that it’s right” or “I definitely know the opposite – when I don’t love what I do.”

Those aren’t wrong answers, they’re just a bit vague. They are tied to emotions, which we know can be fleeting. And, frankly, they aren’t all that helpful. So if you’re not sure if you really love what you do or if you just want some validation, consider these two filters. They aren’t the only criteria, but they’re a good place to start.

You most likely love what you do if …

  1. It’s not just about you.

Real love – the type of love we talk about with Extreme Leadership – is others-focused, not narcissistic. So if you think you love what you do but it’s all about you, then you’re missing the boat.

Scott Krist, a trial lawyer in Houston, put it this way: “I couldn’t do what I do if I didn’t have a genuine love for my clients, for the law, and for how I can help people rebuild their lives.”

He doesn’t mention winning cases or getting rich. There’s nothing wrong with those as motivators, but they can’t be the singular driving force, because those are self-focused pursuits. If you love what you do by focusing on others, the other things flow naturally.

Ryan Hulland, president of Netfloor USA, often sees this expressed as humility.

“For some strange reason, salespeople who don’t stay humble and think their customers absolutely love them never seem to do as well as the down-to-earth, likeable ones,” he said. The best sales people, he points out, are genuine, authentic, and live by the motto, “You have to love your customers more than you think they love you.”

  1. You willingly sacrifice for it.

When you love what you do, you are excited about giving your time to it. That doesn’t mean you don’t want to give your time to other important things. It just means you have an instinctive pull to invest time into your work.

“I don’t just meet with someone once in my office and then never see them again until their case goes to trial,” Krist said. “I’m talking to them and visiting with them regularly and becoming part of their lives while their case is in the process.”

It’s been said that where your “treasure” is, that is where you’ll find your heart. In other words, if you look at where you’re spending your time and money, it will show you what you truly love. Krist said he said he often gets to know more about his clients than “their closest friends or their doctors,” and that type of connection makes the outcome of the cases very personal to him. In other words, his “treasure” is tied up in knowing and helping his clients, which is a good indication that he’s doing something he loves.

What about you? Are you willing to sacrifice your time and money to pursue your work? And is it driven by a sincere desire to serve others, not just yourself? If so, there’s a good chance you love what you do.

 

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Skills Women In Business

The Value of Vulnerability

The Value of Vulnerability

So often when the topic is leadership, qualities like gravitas, confidence and strength are extolled as desirable and even essential. But just as important are some qualities at the other end of the spectrum. Today I’m specifically referring to vulnerability.

We’re all aware of the importance – and sometimes difficulty – of being vulnerable in our personal relationships. Without it, love and intimacy are impossible. But a certain degree of vulnerability is equally as important for development of our professional relationships as well.

I worked with a client who was told by her supervisor that she needed to let people get to know her better; that as head of the department (for quite a while already), it would help overall team chemistry and trust. For someone who was working to overcome perfectionism and fear of making any sort of public mistake, this was daunting.

“How can I open up to them? I don’t know if I can trust them to see that side of me,” she said.

I replied, “My guess is that they probably feel the same about you. But here’s the thing: When you have two people who need to feel like they receive trust (or respect) before they’re willing to give it, there’s a stalemate. Eventually, someone has to ‘blink’ first, take the chance and give the other person the opportunity to demonstrate that they are trustworthy. That starts the cycle.”

But one way or another, the beauty is that you don’t have to trust them with your deepest darkest secrets or the key to the vault. Sometimes it’s just being able to laugh at yourself, or letting them know that you’re under the weather and could use their help that day.

Last week I got a frantic email from a client asking to have a strategy call the next morning before a high-stakes meeting that had just been organized. Understanding her situation and wanting to accommodate, I told her the truth: “Tomorrow morning the only slot that’s open is 9am, but in full transparency, I’m going to be in ‘mommy mode’ at that time, since I have to take my son” (who is 1 year old) “for a checkup at 10, so the nanny won’t arrive until 11. I can’t guarantee what mood he’ll be in or how long we can speak without interruption, but if you want to give it a try, I’m game.”

“I’ll take it,” she said.

So at 9am the call comes in – we coach via FaceTime, video included – and I answer, in a t-shirt with my hair pulled back, hoping she wouldn’t be daunted by my less-than-executive appearance. “I think we’re safe – he’s in his highchair and I’m feeding him breakfast, so he’s busy and happy for a while,” I told her.

My trust in letting my client see me this way was immediately rewarded.

“Oh, is he there? Can you turn the camera? I’d love to see him.”

I turned the camera so my client was face-to-face with the big blue eyes of my son, who stared back at her, mesmerized by the face on the screen. And then this high-powered CFO of a multi-billion-dollar company did the best thing possible: she launched straight into full-scale “peek-a-boo” mode.

My son burst into giggles immediately, and after a moment or two I turned the phone back to me. She had a huge smile on her face, and said, “That was the perfect antidote to the morning I’ve already had, thank you!”

From there we shifted gears and got down to business. We had each let down our guard with and I am confident that we both feel that the mutually shared vulnerability only served to strengthen our bond, both personally and professionally.

So once in a while, take a little chance: (metaphorically) play a bit of “peek-a-boo,” and let them see you.

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Do you have other questions or feedback about vulnerability and leadership? If so, contact me at laura@vocalimpactproductions.com or click here to schedule a 20-minute focus call to discuss it with me personally!

 

 

 

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Skills Women In Business

Know When to STOP Talking

Know When to STOP Talking

Usually I work with people to find the best way for them to talk to their audience and get to “Yes.” Today I want to focus on the exact opposite skill set: knowing when and how to stop talking.

If you’re like me, at some point or other you’ve had the “out-of-body experience” where you catch yourself rambling on, and your brain starts screaming, “for heaven’s sake, just stop talking already!” But you’re on a roll and can’t seem to stop the momentum.

Part of the reason this happens is because Americans are notoriously uncomfortable with silence, which quickly slides becomes “awkward silence,” is something to be avoided. That’s why there’s often a compulsion to fill silence at all costs.

In most of these occurrences, self-doubt is a major factor. Even if you were confident up to that point, something triggers a sudden insecurity, which you telegraph through your rambling.

With that in mind, let’s look at three contexts in which this situation is likely to emerge, why, and how to get yourself back under control.

Waiting for a response

The most common scenario is when you’ve asked a question or made a comment, and the other person doesn’t respond right away. You subconsciously fear that they didn’t understand what you’ve said, or didn’t like it and don’t want to answer it. So you rephrase, or qualify, or suggest possible answers to your own question, until someone finally jumps in.

In reality, sometimes people just need a moment to digest what you’ve said, especially if it is technical or an important decision. Be generous in allowing them time to think, uninterrupted, before they respond.

Over-explaining

The second context is when you think you need to keep explaining something. Maybe your topic is complicated and you are speaking to non-experts or you might be speaking to people who are experts, which can be intimidating, so you feel compelled to share more to demonstrate your expertise. Or you might interpret their silence as disapproval, at which point you keep talking in attempt to qualify or justify your argument and persuade them to agree with you.

Ironically, however, in these situations, the more you ramble, the more it will likely dissuade your audience because you sound nervous rather than confident. In these cases, make your point, then just hold your ground – and your tongue. This indicates that you’re okay with waiting for them to break the silence. If necessary, you can always ask them if they are confused by something, or would like clarification. Knowing when to stop demonstrates confidence.

Scrambling for answers

Finally, rambling often occurs when you need to answer a question or offer a response, and don’t feel like you have time to think it through before you are expected to speak. The pressure is on, and the silence seems interminable as all eyes are on you. But rather than thinking aloud you as you try to figure out what you really want to say, try starting with something like, “That’s a great question; let me think about the best way to answer it concisely.” Who would deny that request, especially if the alternative is a rambling mess?

Here’s a final tip: Write a note to remind yourself to avoid these pitfalls, and look at it before you go into the next high stakes meeting. If you wait until you catch yourself rambling, it’s too late. Priming yourself with these reminders before you start is one of the best ways to project persuasive confidence and leadership.

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Do you have questions or comments about the issues in today’s post? If so, contact me at laura@vocalimpactproductions.com or click here to schedule a 20-minute focus call to discuss them with me personally!

 

 

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Entrepreneurship Personal Development Women In Business

People Leaving Their Corporate Positions is Increasing: They’re Running Out the Door

People Leaving Their Corporate Positions is Increasing: They’re Running Out the Door

During the past few years, more and more people have been leaving their corporate positions. They’re not walking, they are running out the door. Recent studies have suggested that there has been an increasing number of men and women quitting their jobs, regardless of the dips the economy has taken in recent years. It is apparent that this growing rate of people leaving the corporate world has very little to do with money. An astounding 74 percent of people stated that they were looking to leave their current corporate positions.

People in corporate positions are reporting that they feel unhappy, unappreciated, and unnoticed at work. People are also stating that internal politics and disrespectful bosses are having a negative impact on their lives, and no longer wish to continue working for an unethical corporation. Negative work conditions and poor leadership seem to be pushing people to start their own companies. They want to be in a position where they have the power to create healthier work conditions, and maintain happiness in the work place.

Making the decision to leave your current corporate position and become an entrepreneur can be nerve racking. Especially if you have been in the corporate world for the majority of your career. You are leaving something that is comfortable and secure to pursue your own dreams, which can sometime be unpredictable. This is why it’s important to have an exit plan. This will help you avoid leaving your current job in an abrupt way that will leave you broke and overwhelmed.

When you devise a strategy to leave your current career path, it can help you make your transition a bit smoother. If you are in a position where you have made investments that are tied to your current company, you may have to be a little more strategic when making your plans. Take your time when planning your strategy. Remember, the whole point of having an exit strategy is so you have a clear game plan. If you rush into it without being clear on every aspect of your strategy, you will most likely find yourself in a risky situation.

Have an Unstoppable Day,

Do you have questions or comments about the issues in today’s post, want to know how to apply them, or how to help others with them? If so, contact me at connie@pheiffgroup.com or CLICK HERE to schedule a 20-minute discovery call to discuss with you personally.

 

 

 

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Personal Development Women In Business

Do You Hold Yourself Back From Success?

Do you hold yourself back from success?

“Whenever I’m in a meeting and I think of a question or comment, I end up debating with myself about whether or not to say it… then a few minutes later someone else says what I’m thinking, and it leads to a great discussion. I could kick myself when that happens!”

This is a challenge described by many of my clients, both men and women alike, and it stems from a lack of confidence on a variety of levels. But regardless of the origin, the outcome is the same: you hold yourself back from being recognized for your insights, expertise and overall value to the team.

So what causes this behavior, and what can you do about it?

The late, great sales guru, Zig Ziglar, had a powerful expression that has stuck with me from the first time I heard it many years ago. He said that you have to ask yourself, “Is your fear of failure greater than your desire to succeed?”

The short answer is that, for people who typically hold back as described above, their default answer, often subconsciously, is a resounding “YES.” That’s why they hold back.

What is most powerful to me is the thought process you inevitably go through if you actually ask yourself that question when you find yourself holding back That’s because it actually leads to three deeper and more concrete questions that will help you regain confidence and hopefully compel you to take action:

The first is, how would you define “failure” in that situation, and what’s the worst thing that could happen if you did “fail”? Maybe it means you could make a mistake, share wrong information or demonstrate ignorance. And what would be the repercussions of one of those situations? I highly doubt that you could lose your job, take a major hit to your reputation, or die of embarrassment. The worst that would happen is that you might get corrected in public. You’ve heard others make contributions that were not received with open arms; what happened to them? Most likely, nothing

The second key question is, how would you define “success” in that context? Success could be simply a matter of knowing you made a valuable contribution to the discussion. Maybe your idea provides a critical piece that will help the group to problem-solve more efficiently. One way or another, you will show yourself to be a valuable, proactive member of a team, and it might put you on someone’s radar, for all the right reasons.

A third question that gets overlooked is, “What is the effect of silence on my part?” Remember, holding back judiciously from time to time is probably appreciated by most people. But when your reputation in those meetings becomes one of someone who is non-participatory, playing it “safe” and hiding in self-defense mode unless forced to speak, does that really project leadership?

And just in case you were thinking about playing the “introvert” card, stop right there. That excuse won’t work. Introversion is not about fear of public speaking, confidence or general shyness. It’s about how you get energized, and what takes energy from you. Don’t mistake being an introvert with being hesitant to ask a question or offer a comment in a team meeting.

So the next time you recognize that you are holding back, do two things: First, decide what you want your leadership reputation to be. Then ask yourself: “Is my fear of failure greater than my desire to succeed?”

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Do you have questions or comments about the issues in today’s post? If so, contact me at laura@vocalimpactproductions.com or click here to schedule a 20-minute focus call to discuss them with me personally!

 

 

 

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Entrepreneurship Management Operations Personal Development

Lessons From Love-Focused

Love has always been good business. No, I’m not talking about the world’s oldest profession. That’s not love. I’m talking about the kind of love that leads to wedding bells – businesses that cater to people who want to find true love or who have found it and want to celebrate it.

But what can those types of love-focused businesses teach us about how we can use love as a principle that shapes any business? Plenty.

Janis Spindel, the president of Serious Matchmaking, believes the type of trust and confidence you need when looking for personal love are also vital to leadership in any business.

“A loving relationship is about being committed,” Spindel said. “Business leadership requires the same commitment and intuitiveness.”

When people love others, Spindel said, they communicate more clearly and support each other more proactively, which makes for healthy relationships in business as well as in life.

Lindsey Sachs, whose company Collective/by Sachs plans weddings in Colorado and Minnesota, believes love is an essential lens through which to view business decisions.

“Considering love in the context of business helps to make companies human, authentic, relatable and better yet, more than a transaction,” Sachs said. “As professionals and consumers, we all understand the overwhelming feeling love plays in our emotions and decisions. A company that infuses love is more likely to stand out.”

Love, she said, creates empathy and purpose in her work.

“With love present, we can more clearly relate to our clients and staff, find common goals to lead to more powerful solutions, products, and services,” she said. “And keeping love at the forefront encourages us to see our work through a different lens of appreciation. … Reminding ourselves that our work stems from a love of something much greater, our overall context, attitude and ultimately productivity will adapt for the good.”

Businesses that promote love and celebrate love still need profits to keep their doors open, but they understand the powerful connection between loving what you do in the service of people who love what you do. It builds strong relationships, trust, loyalty, and the commitment that allows a business to not only make money but make a difference.

 

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Entrepreneurship Personal Development Women In Business

How Did Eight Senior VPS Perform Against All Odds

Companies large and small have an opportunity to create a culture of success from looking at the lens of the employee.

Case Study

My business success and acumen presented me the opportunity to be the CEO of Girl Scouts. It was a position I will cherish forever. As CEO, my responsibility was to serve our staff, board members, girl and Adult membership. Girl Scouts is an organization to serve every girl everywhere. However, competition was growing fierce and girls were seeking other opportunities ~ opportunities that would compete with the Girl Scout programs.

Stakeholders were concerned with the loss of girl membership and quality of programs. Being the CEO allowed me to use my skill of Emotional Engagement; which means getting people to ‘want’ to do something. People don’t want to be told what to do. People in general ‘want’ to do what is right for the organization.

The culture was clear, the Girl Scout organization has a mission to serve the girls~ it’s not what’s in it for the organization… it’s what we can do for our members.

The outcome of the year was unexpected. As this was the year the Girl Scouts would realign its boundaries. The leadership team was under pressure to perform knowing that at the end of the year each would be re-applying for their position, myself included. That didn’t hold them back. A clear path was set, each were determined to work side-by-side to get the job done.

Creating a culture of Emotional Engagement was the strongest it had been in years. The council ended the year exceeding the membership goal by 86%, the number of Gold Award participants and individual Scout awards increased by 48% and philanthropy giving increased by 42%. The board grew in size while gaining members of influence and staff-rating scores set a record high because of the advocacy, pride, and enjoyment of the job. The organization flourished because the culture of emotional engagement flourished from the Camp Staff to the Board of Directors.

 

Be Unstoppable Together

Connie Pheiff, Unstoppable DIVA

 

Do you have questions or comments about the content in today’s post; want to know how to apply Emotional Engagement in your business, or how to help others grow a successful business? If so, contact me at connie@pheiffgroup.com or <CLICK HERE> to schedule a 20-minute discovery call to discuss with you personally.

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Entrepreneurship Leadership Marketing Personal Development

Use Podcasting to Share Your Story

These days, you can’t run a successful business and be in a position of leadership without being connected to the online world. However, getting your business started online isn’t always easy. Just knowing where to start can be a challenge. It can be overwhelming and confusing, but you don’t have to do this alone. Podcasting is a great way to get your name out there and share your story, services, and even your products online. There are a lot of podcasts that cater to women in leadership and entrepreneurs. I know, this may sound a bit challenging for someone who’s not sure how to even get themselves started online, but don’t worry you’re in the right place. Here are 5 steps that will help you get booked on a podcast so you can share your story with listeners.

  • Identifying The Podcast That’s Right for You
    • The first thing you have to do is identify the podcast that will be right for you. Knowing which podcast is right for you is probably a lot simpler than you think. All you have to do is figure out what your demographic is. For example; If you are in a c-suite position, you should find a podcast that caters to people in high level positions like yours. If you’re an entrepreneur striving towards leadership and success, you’ll want to find a pod cast that focuses on entrepreneurs.
  • Make Sure You Do Research
    • After you have found a podcast that suits your agenda, make sure you do some research. Find out how many listeners the podcast has on average, listen to a few of the podcasts to make sure it’s a right fit, and make sure you are dealing with professionals. If you’re booked by a podcast that has unprofessional hosts with no experience, you will not be helping your business or cause at all. In fact, it can even do damage to your credibility.
    • You should also see what kind of topics the podcasts that you research covers. Up or Out with Connie is a podcast on the C-suite network that often covers topics surrounding both entrepreneurs and people that work in high level C-suit positions. It’s perfect for someone that is looking to go from C-Suite, to successful entrepreneur.
  • Devise A Plan
    • Before you can approach a podcast about sharing your story you’ll have to devise a plan. Think of what you would like to talk about on the podcast, and how you would like everything you say to come across to listeners. Figure out what your key points are as well. After you have done that, work on putting your plan on paper. You should also plan how you’re going to approach the podcast about sharing your story. Believe it or not, you may even be able to get some good advice about this listening to Up or Out with Connie. She’s all about lifting up women in leadership, and helping them to grow.
  • Reach Out
    • Now that you have done some research, devised a plan, and found the podcast that’s right for you, it’s time to reach out. Contact the podcast that you believe would be a good platform to tell your story. You can send them an e-mail or message with your plan attached. Remember, it’s not a marriage. You don’t have to stick to one podcast – so don’t get discouraged if someone turns you down. It’s always good to have a few prospects.
  • Crush It
    • Don’t underestimate the benefits of telling your story on the right podcast. If you don’t practice and don’t have everything together it can damage your bottom line. So make sure you study your plan, have some things memorized (especially your key points), and speak clearly. Don’t be shy either. If you show up with confidence it will show strong leadership skills, and you are guaranteed to get your point across to their listeners.

 

Be Unstoppable Together!

 

Do you have questions or comments about the issues in today’s post? Want to know how to apply them, or how to help others with them? If so, contact me at connie@pheiffgroup.com or CLICK HERE to schedule a 20-minute discovery call to discuss with you personally.