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“Body Language 3 Secret Myths To Increase Your Influence” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

There are three body language myths, once dispelled, that will increase your level of influence

 

and give you greater control over other people. Discover what they are in this week’s …

 

Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

“Body language can be the dispeller of myths that increases your influence.”  -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

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Click here to get the book!

“Body Language 3 Secret Myths To Increase Your Influence” 

People don’t realize they’re always negotiating.

How do you determine your degree of influence based on the body language gestures you detect when talking with someone? And what body language signs in particular of theirs do you observe to make your assessment?

How about your body language? Do you observe your emotional state and the signals you emit when interacting with others? Your emotional state influences your gestures, which in turn affect your emotions. And that shapes the degrees of power you have with others. What follows are three body language myths you can use to reshape your paradigm.

 

Click here to learn how to increase your influence with other people.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!  

 

Check out this offer to learn more about negotiating better and reading body language!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcasts at https://megaphone.link/CSN6318246585  Once there, double click on the one you would like to hear.

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

 

 

 

Categories
Culture Growth Health and Wellness Skills

Dear Katherine: We Give Her an Inch, She Takes a Mile

Dear Katherine,

My 5-year-old daughter has always disliked being told what to do. Now that we’re changing our approach to the parent-child relationship, she’s convinced that she was right all along about being able to do whatever she wants. 

When we give her even a little bit of freedom, she tries to take as much power as she can get. It isn’t sustainable! 

How can we achieve a healthy balance? 

Sincerely,

Not So Sure About This

Hey there, Not So Sure About This! I love this question.

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First of all, congratulations on having a confident and strong-willed child. Behaviors like what you’re describing can be the source of many parenting challenges. Take comfort in knowing that autonomous children grow up to be strong, capable adults who positively impact the world around them.

Right now, your daughter is getting her sea legs, so to speak. You’re transitioning from one parenting style to another, and she’s experimenting with her new boundaries. Where her autonomy was once limited, it’s now being encouraged. She’s grasping for power because she’s afraid she’ll lose it again.

Your daughter needs to know that you aren’t going back to the old way, which left her feeling dismissed and out of control.

The transition to conscious parenting can be disorienting for children. But the good news is that your daughter is only 5. The rule of thumb is that for each year of a child’s age, you can expect them to need that many weeks to adjust.

Here’s how to make it through the next 5 weeks:

Talk her through this transition.

Your daughter probably doesn’t realize that there is a cultural shift taking place in your family. It’s important to talk her through why you’re changing your tactics.

Help her understand that the sense of healthy empowerment she’s feeling isn’t going anywhere and that you’re committed to this new approach.

Reinforce new habits. 

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The techniques your parents used on you as a child likely inspired the parenting style you’ve relied on for the last 5 years. It’s become habitual—and habits are hard to break.

In a challenging situation, your first instinct may be to revert to your old behavior patterns. Keep reminding yourself that those habits won’t yield the results you’re hoping for.

It takes strength and determination to replace old habits with new ones. But the more committed you are to conscious parenting, the faster you’ll see positive changes.

Manage your expectations.

It’s easier said than done, but try not to get frustrated that your daughter hasn’t adjusted to these changes quite yet.

Motivating your 5-year old to act out of consideration for others, rather than because she was told to behave a certain way, is a big ask. And your daughter can pick up on your stress, so accepting that she’ll need time to evolve is key to a smooth transition.

Not So Sure About This, the most important thing of all is to keep going. You’re on the right track, and I have full confidence that you and your daughter will overcome these challenges.

Love and Blessings,

Katherine

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Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“3 Every Day Power Secrets You Can Use To Help Negotiate Better” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“To negotiate better, you must know when, and how, to use your sources of power.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)   

Click here to get the book!

 

 

“3 Every Day Power Secrets You Can Use To Help Negotiate Better”

 

 

People don’t realize they’re always negotiating.

He said, “To negotiate better in a power negotiation, you must know the secrets of power, along with how and when to use them. And there are three power secrets that will help you negotiate better in any negotiation.” That was the advice a master negotiator gracefully imparted to a rising negotiator seeking to increase her negotiation skills.

Are you aware of the powerful secrets that the master negotiator was referring to? Do you know how to use power secrets to control negotiations? If you are unaware of those secrets or want to increase your negotiation abilities, continue.

Click here to discover more!

Remember, you’re always negotiating!  

 

Check out this offer to learn more about negotiating better and reading body language!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcasts at https://megaphone.link/CSN6318246585  Once there, double click on the one you would like to hear.

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive weekly free 5-minute sneak peeks into the brilliant techniques offered by Greg, click here

https://www.themasternegotiator.com/negotiation-speaker/   and sign up at the bottom of the page

 

 

 

 

 

Categories
Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“Situational Awareness How To Help Increase Your Body Language Skills” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“When situational awareness is lax, the journey’s end may not be the destination sought.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)    Click here to get the book!

 

 

“Situational Awareness How To Help Increase Your Body Language Skills”

 

 

People don’t realize they’re always negotiating.

Do you know the benefits of situational awareness related to body language? When reading body language, the greater your situational awareness as to what may have caused a displayed gesture, the greater will become your ability to read body language accurately. And the same is true about your self-situational awareness per the gestures you emit.

Once you become tuned to them, your awareness and recognition of the following four color-coded situational awareness stages will benefit you. Accordingly, having a sense of situational awareness will enhance your negotiation and reading body language skills as you interact with others. Thus, it is for that reason I tie situational awareness to reading body language.

 

Click here to continue and discover more!

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!  

Check out this offer to learn more about negotiating better and reading body language!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcasts at https://megaphone.link/CSN6318246585  Once there, double click on the one you would like to hear.

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive weekly free 5-minute sneak peeks into the brilliant techniques offered by Greg, click here

https://www.themasternegotiator.com/negotiation-speaker/   and sign up at the bottom of the page

 

 

 

 

 

Categories
Best Practices Body Language Culture Health and Wellness Human Resources Management Skills Women In Business

Important and Urgent

Right before the pandemic hit, I was speaking to a highly-regarded CEO about how I help business leaders up-level their game as it pertains to stress management. She was intrigued, but ultimately said, “You know, what you do is important, but not urgent (referring to the Eisenhower Matrix, a simple decision-making tool that helps you prioritize tasks).”

Almost two years to the day, managing stress and the consequences of not managing it well, have finally captured our attention. Mental health, wellness, work-life balance, burnout, depression, anxiety, and sadly suicide have become all too common in our everyday lives. Here in the US, we’ve plummeted down the world rankings for happiness.

But what does that mean for employers in the coming year? If you haven’t heard the term “The Great Resignation,” it’s important you do.

According to the Harvard Business Review, more than 9 million global employees quit their jobs in July 2021. And of them, the largest share went to the 30-to-45-year-old bracket. Unsurprising as this average age of new managers, carrying a large amount of stress and usually the least equipped to deal with it.

There are many complicating reasons for this exodus, but according to the study: “many of these workers may have simply reached a breaking point after months and months of high workloads, hiring freezes, and other pressures, causing them to rethink their work and life goals(https://hbr.org/2021/09/who-is-driving-the-great-resignation).”

In my 38 years as a mental health professional, my most engaged clients have been those between the ages of 30 and 45. They’ve lived past their 20’s when they thought they knew everything. And haven’t yet reached their 50’s where again, they will think they know everything.

It’s a time of growth when the existential meaning of life is most compelling. This generation, in particular, is hungry to learn, purpose-driven, and doesn’t want to wait until retirement to start enjoying what the world has to offer.

Given that we are living in unprecedented times, we must all pay attention to the underlying forces at play and the real costs of ignoring them. These issues are complicated and not easy to solve. Yet, if we don’t address them, our continued spiral towards an unhappy society will rage on.

To be very specific, when stress hormones flood the body and the brain, a person’s executive functioning goes “offline.” The desire may be there, but the capacity is not. Much has been said and written about focusing on the “whole person.” But what does that look like from an employer’s perspective?

1. Good mental health is not intuitive – it’s learned. Stress relief apps, office yoga, massage gift cards, etc. They are helpful, but not sufficient in building the kind of internal resiliency needed to cope with our current stressors. Picture bringing a plastic fork to a gunfight. Management teams need real skills and proven methods for managing staff happiness.

2. Peak Performance is predictable and repeatable. Again, one needs to understand how both the body and mind work to achieve these highly productive states. To achieve a sustainable workflow while operating in high-stress environments, one needs to be properly equipped.

3. Mind, Body, Spirit, and Emotion. These four pillars comprise a whole system and thus, a whole person. Pay attention to them and your team will notice. I can’t guarantee these methods will make you their favorite boss, but I can guarantee that you will be setting them up for success both inside your organization and for life.

The last few years have provided us with great challenges and even greater opportunities. It would be a shame to let this time of introspection pass by without making genuine change for the better. When the calendar rolls around to 2022, do you want to find yourself repeating negative thought patterns? Neither does your team.

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Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“6 Secret Negotiation Tips To Help You Get Better Outcomes” – Negotiation Insight

 

“To reach better outcomes, you must unlock the doors that conceal them.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)     Click here to get the book!

 

“6 Secret Negotiation Tips To Help You Get Better Outcomes”

 

People don’t realize they’re always negotiating.

When people negotiate, they want the best outcome. But some people are unaware of how to achieve that quest. They lack knowledge about secret negotiation tips, negotiation tips that profoundly impact the talks. After incorporating the following six negotiation tips into your negotiation repertoire, you will reach better outcomes.

Click here to discover how to get more from every negotiation you’re in!

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcasts at https://megaphone.link/CSN6318246585  Once there, double click on the one you would like to hear.

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive weekly free 5-minute sneak peeks into the brilliant techniques offered by Greg, click here

https://www.themasternegotiator.com/negotiation-speaker/   and sign up at the bottom of the page

 

 

 

Categories
Entrepreneurship Human Resources Negotiations Skills Women In Business

“Negotiating A Salary Increase — How To Do It Properly And Persuasively” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“To negotiate salary increases successfully, you must know the perception of value and how to use it.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

 

 

Click here to get the book!

 

“Negotiating A Salary Increase — How To Do It Properly And Persuasively”

 

People don’t realize they’re always negotiating.

Whether you are a fresh graduate or a seasoned professional, you have probably given some thought to the tricky salary negotiation process. That is because negotiating a salary increase can be fraught with opportunities and disappointments. Thus, like in any negotiation, the better prepared you are for the coming interactions, enhanced will become the probability of getting what you seek.

What follows are insider thoughts and ideas about how you can become more successful in your salary negotiations and enhance your negotiating salary increases.

Click here to discover more!

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Coauthor Reese Jones

 

 

Listen to Greg’s podcasts at https://megaphone.link/CSN6318246585  Once there, double click on the one you would like to hear.

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive weekly free 5-minute sneak peeks into the brilliant techniques offered by Greg, click here

https://www.themasternegotiator.com/negotiation-speaker/   and sign up at the bottom of the page

 

Categories
Body Language Management Skills

Six Ways To Channel Nervous Energy Into An Influential Message

The day has arrived, and you are moments away from stepping in front of an audience to give your big presentation. Your heart is racing, and your palms are sweating. You’re a nervous wreck. You’ve done everything necessary to prepare: created a strong outline of speaking points, carefully curated bullet points for motivating slides, and practiced until the data was a part of you. You simply can’t understand why you feel so nervous, so you immediately begin to question your ability to deliver your message.

Don’t worry! If you’re nervous, it means you’ve got a pulse. You’re human. Nervous energy is natural, especially when you’re put into a situation that doesn’t occur often enough to make it feel like second nature. If you weren’t nervous, I would question whether you were truly committed to doing a good job.

Here are six ways to channel that nervous energy into an influential message. By doing so, you can motivate your listeners to act upon what you have to say.

Everyone wants to see you succeed

Your listeners are rooting for you. They’ve taken time from their busy schedules to attend your meeting. They don’t have to be there; they want to be there. They want to hear what you have to say. It’s up to you to make it worth their time. No one in the audience is hoping that you’ll trip, stumble, stutter or forget a point. You’re on the same team, and they want to see you succeed. Your success equals their success. Get out of your own head and realize the presentation is about them, not you. You are simply the messenger sharing data points that benefit your audience and meet their needs. When you stop worrying about yourself, you can redirect your inward thinking and prioritize what’s most important: your listeners.

Get comfortable being uncomfortable

If you’ve ever learned how to play a sport or musical instrument, you know the fear that comes with uncertainty. Coaches and teachers give us skills to practice, which stretch our abilities. At first, it feels awkward and unnatural. As the coaching continues, your skills are fine-tuned, helping you develop and improve. Each coach-recommended modification requires us to carefully concentrate and think through even the slightest motions. It is frustrating and often invokes defense mechanisms. The same holds true with our communication skills. When we aren’t used to routinely stepping on stage or delivering high-stakes presentations, it feels unnatural. We question if we are doing it right. In this moment, we must commit to embracing the discomfort and realize it is part of the development process needed for improvement.

Your discomfort is not noticeable

When stepping on stage, your audience can’t tell how you feel. Nervous energy may course uncontrollably through your body. Maybe your palms are sweaty, or you are slightly shaking. Maybe you feel your face turning red or that you might throw up. Fortunately, your audience does not see how you feel. Think back through the last few people you witnessed giving presentations. They likely felt the same nerves you’re experiencing now. It’s unlikely that you saw their nervous energy. The same holds true with you. What you feel is not what your audience experiences.

Breathe

No matter how much you’ve practiced or rehearsed, butterflies are normal. You can control that nervous energy by learning to control your breathing. Controlled breathing will help you pace your rate of speech, calm your jitters and focus on what you have to say rather than on the adrenaline rush you’re experiencing. Breathing requires practice. While rehearsing your presentation before the big day, concentrate on your breathing. Identify areas in-between topic transitions or big data points that you want to resonate. Pause to breathe deeply and allow the point you just made to resonate with your listeners. When you practice this behavior, it becomes a natural part of your presentation.

It’s like a daily conversation

It’s unlikely you would be quite this nervous if you were presenting your points to just one or two people. Your tone, energy, and speaking rhythm would be comfortable and conversational. There is no rule that says you can’t treat an audience of 100 the same as you would an audience of one. Think of it as less of a presentation and more of a conversation. Invite your audience to be a part of the discussion. They will feel less like they are being spoken to and more like a part of the discussion. When you realize the presentation is the same no matter the audience size, you become more natural and authentic.

Treat every day like game day

Instead of focusing your efforts on one specific presentation or event, start treating every conversation as if it were a high-stakes moment. Practice your communication skills in every interaction so they become second nature. The more you practice in day-to-day conversations, the easier it becomes. If you wait to practice until right before the big day, it’s already too late.

Nervous energy can work in your favor when you recognize its power to elevate your message. We all get nervous. The goal is to channel that energy to influence your audience to act upon your recommendations. Embrace it. Recognize that it is human nature, and let it work for you.

Categories
Best Practices Culture Growth Health and Wellness Skills

Dear Katherine: My son and his stepfather are no longer speaking

Hello, Conscious Parent! This post is the first installment of “Dear Katherine,” a letter written in response to a real-life question from an anonymous parent/caregiver. If you’d like to submit a question of your own, email me at katherine@consciousparentingrevolution.com. 

My teenage son had a massive falling out with my husband, his stepfather. My husband was triggered by my son’s actions, and the whole thing escalated into a fever pitch. Now my son refuses to talk to his stepfather, and my husband refuses to apologize. What do I do? How can I help repair the damage and find a way to move forward?

– Caught in Between

Dear Caught in Between,

It sounds like there’s more than one culprit in this story. Your husband was triggered by something your son said, and he escalated events by reacting to his stepfather’s heightened emotions. So both of them seem to have felt attacked, and both of them were also the attacker.

The first step to healing any wounded relationship is to apologize. But your child shouldn’t be the only one expected to say sorry—your husband has to do so, too.

One of the most common and long-held beliefs I’ve come across in my career as a parenting coach is that adults should never have to apologize to children. This belief assumes that adults are perfect (which we all know we’re not) and never to blame for a household argument.

But refusing to admit wrongdoing tells your kid that they’re not important enough to receive an apology, that perhaps their feelings are insignificant. Children are humans too! And as their caregivers, it’s our responsibility to recognize when we’ve hurt them and to make things right.

You are caught in Between. First, you must explain to both your son and your husband that they both have to apologize. I know you weren’t a part of this mess, to begin with, but you do have the ability to facilitate and lead your family members to reconciliation.

Find some time to talk with your husband about the Guidance Approach to Parenting, a method founded on principles of compassion and empathetic listening instead of obedience and compliance. Tell him how it’s helped you have a better relationship with your son.

Talk to your son. Tell him that his stepfather is a product of generations worth of traditional parenting hard-wiring, and that kind of conditioning can be hard to break. Explain to him that as his mother, you’re trying your best to change old patterns, but it’s a work in progress, and nobody’s perfect.

At the end of the day, Caught in Between, connection is more important than being right. Nobody is right or wrong. Apologizing is about admitting that your actions hurt another person so that you can find a way to balm the hurt and move on as a family.

 

Love and Blessings,

Katherine

P.S. For more tips on how to handle discord in the family, listen to my interview “How to Resolve Family Conflicts” with Mindful Mama podcast host, Hunter Clarke-Fields.

Categories
Growth Health and Wellness Skills Women In Business

Don’t Let Conflicts with Your Kids Spook You This Halloween

Halloween is an important night for kids of all ages.

 

It’s a wonderful social opportunity combined with the chance to exercise their creativity.

 

And of course, let’s not forget about all that candy. 

 

But like many holidays and major events, the excitement of Halloween can also increase conflict between parents and children. And fighting with your kid is a surefire way to derail the spooky fun of All Hallow’s Eve.

 

Here are three scary conflicts you may face this Halloween, and some parenting tips to help you avoid them.

 

Candy, Costumes and Curfews:

Three Conflicts to Avoid

this Halloween

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1. Candy

 

If you have younger children, you’re probably used to doing the same song and dance about their Halloween candy every year. They want to eat all that candy the minute they get home, but you know that will result in a stomachache.

 

And if the candy makes it through the night, they’ll want it for all three meals the next day!

 

Are you just going to throw your hands up in frustration and accept the cavities and belly aches in your future? You don’t have to.

 

Avoid the conflict altogether by talking to your kids before Halloween night about the smartest way to enjoy their candy.

 

Explain why you suggest saving some candy so that they can enjoy it for a longer period of time. Without laying it on too thick, let them know that eating too much candy might make them feel sick.

 

Then, work with your child to create a candy-consumption schedule together. It’s important that your child feels included in this process so that they won’t feel like something important to them is totally out of their control.

 

2. Costumes

 

Halloween costumes can be such a headache for parents. When kids are little, they may not like the costume you choose for them, or they may change their mind at the last minute. Teenagers, on the other hand, might want to venture out of the house in something you find inappropriate.

 

How do you navigate these minefields without causing a blowup?

 

With younger children, you may have to bite the bullet and accept that their whiplash tastes are out of your control. Before buying a costume, encourage your child to help make or pick out part of the costume to fulfill their desire for autonomy.

 

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But if in the eleventh hour they still throw a tantrum because they don’t like their costume, your best bet might be to go along with it. You may get some memorable photos out of whatever they come up with!

 

If you have a teenager, open the dialogue about what constitutes an inappropriate costume and why. Approach them as if you’re picking their brain and offering your opinion. You’ll make the most headway if your teen feels heard and understood, rather than controlled. Show them that they have a say in the decision you come to together.

 

3. Curfew

For parents of teenagers, curfew can be a major point of contention on special occasions. You want to be an understanding parent raising an independent kid, but you also want them to stay safe. Especially on Halloween, a night that’s associated with mischief and other potential dangers.

The best course of action to avoid a conflict is to compromise. If it’s important to your kid, let them stay out a few hours later than normal, provided they are willing to check in with you at the top of the hour or let you pick them up from wherever they are.

This type of agreement will help build trust between you and your teen.

Halloween is such a special night—not to mention a source of positive memories for the whole family. It’s a great opportunity to show your kids what a supportive parent you are. Don’t let the small stuff get in the way!

Love and Blessings,

Katherine

P.S. If you want to see how other parents navigate special occasions with their kids, join the growing community inside our private Facebook group!