C-Suite Network™

Categories
Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Health and Wellness Human Resources Management Skills Women In Business

The New Normal (TNN) #2:Managing Your Stress Levels

(Stay Safe. Stay Smart. Stay Apart.) What can you do with today’s added stress? Tina defines “stress” as the amount of control we think we have over a situation (which, right away, puts the idea of “stress” into a scalable, manageable perspective). Take a deep breath and exhale fully before you read on. Really. We’ll wait. Okay, did you notice a change in your thoughts, feelings or body? That old cliché, “take a deep breath and count to ten before you respond” still works. Whenever you notice your mind drifting over to the aspects of the pandemic you don’t have any control over, take a deep breath and count to ten. What do you do to get your stress level under control?

REMEMBER: Stay Safe. Stay Smart. Stay Apart.

Categories
Body Language Management Negotiations Women In Business

“In A Time of Danger Read Body Language – How To”

“Hope springs eternal until reality resets it.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert.

 

“In A Time of Danger Read Body Language – How To”

 

He sensed danger. But instead of taking action, he wished upon a star. And then, that star fell on him!

In a time of danger, to protect yourself, you must be able to read body language accurately! Because that’s the one way, you’ll be able to detect the degree of someone’s truthfulness. That means you’ll be less likely to become fooled by what someone says, versus what their body language displays.

 

Senses

  • Intuition

Sometimes, you’re more attuned to what’s occurring then you realize. When you ‘have a feeling’ about something, is when your awareness becomes activated. While you may call it ‘a feeling’ or a hunch, what you’re experiencing is the sensation of intuition.

Your intuition is a powerful detector when it comes to assessing someone’s truthfulness. Because there are signals that you perceive subliminally through your subconscious sensory that attempts to alert you about a present situation. And not until the sensation alerts your conscious level of thinking do you become aware that something may be awry. So, when you have a hunch about something not being right, realize that it could be a signal alerting you to avoid possible danger.

 

Gestures

  • Small Gestures

When people are not truthful, they sense threats when questioned about the inaccuracies in their statements. If they believe their declarations may lead to some form of danger for themselves or those in their care, they may do one of two things to release that feeling. They may start to make smaller body language gestures (that’s an effort to protect themselves), or they may begin to make more significant ones (e.g., sweeping/broad gestures with their hands).

In either case, note the differences in their gestures, as they go through their story and how it alters when you question aspects about it. The fluctuation in the rhythm of their signals will alert you to when they’re straying from the truth. And that will allow you to stay clear of potential danger.

 

  • Facial Actions

Hair – Note when someone speaks, and they stroke their hand through their hair to expose more of their face. Based on whether the discussion is threatening or pleasant, that body language gesture could be a sign of defiance (i.e., don’t push me – I’m prepared to defend myself and push back on you) or one that displays more openness. You can note the difference between a situation that’s pleasant and one that’s more threatening by the actions and demeanor of the people in the environment. A threatening situation contains more hostilities and negative body language signals (i.e., frowning, elevated voice, people talking over one another, etc.).

Hands to face – When feeling threatened from lies, especially if the teller knows that the deception may lead to danger, people will tend to touch their face more than when they’re telling the truth. When being deceitful, they may place their hand over their mouth (i.e., I want to hold this lie back) around their ear (i.e., I wonder what the other person hears and thinks about what I’m saying). They may also momentarily rest their face on their hand or place their hand under their chin. Such actions denote an attempt to perform a self-comforting gesture until they’re sure that you have not detected their deception. Take note when you see these gestures. They could be signaling your attention.

Nose – Touching one’s nose when speaking was thought by some people to be an indication that the person was lying. There’s some truth to that statement. But to discern when that might be the truth, you should observe when someone touches or rubs their nose. If they do so while experiencing anxiety and you suspect it’s due to their lack of truthfulness, note further times when they do so. If it continues, you may have captured the reasoning for their action. And that should alert you to possible danger.

Head signals – Another giveaway sign that someone may be attempting to lead you into danger is the head signals they display when speaking. When there’s inconsistency in head movement (i.e., shaking one’s head indicating no while saying yes), be alert to the mixed message that person is emitting. Note the times when the mixed signal is displayed and when it occurs. Since the body always attempts to stay in a state of truthfulness, take your lead about someone’s believability from their body signals more than their words.

 

Signs of Sincerity

  • Pointing

Pointing to one’s self when making statements is a sign of sincerity (e.g., believe me – as the person points to himself). Just be aware that some deceitful people will attempt to use this gesture to convince you that they’re sincere. If you sense they’re insincere, ask them why they keep pointing at themselves when making statements. Observe if they respond with a curious look or if they seek further understanding of what you’re asking. Regardless of their response, you should note the degree the pointing becomes altered. That alteration will give you the insight to further assess how truthful they are and to what degree they may be attempting to pull you into dangerous territory.

 

Reflection

In a time of danger or uncertainty, watch someone’s body language to gather further insights about their believability. Since everyone’s body always attempts to stay in a state of comfort, displays of uneasiness will be the doorway that opens the betrayal of their deceit. And you can note their altered state by the signals mentioned (i.e., intuition, gestures, signs of sincerity).

Being able to read body language is like reading someone’s mind. Thus, the better you become at it, the better you’ll be at understanding how someone is thinking, along with what they may be attempting to do to you. That will give you a significant advantage in the interactions you have with others. And everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

Categories
Body Language Entrepreneurship Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“How To Negotiate In The Frightening Times Of Reckoning” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“The only thing that trumps fear is a conscious mind controlling it.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

Click to get the book!

“How To Negotiate In The Frightening Times Of Reckoning”

 

I didn’t need all this stuff. Then why did you buy it? Just in case I need it. They’re shutting down everything. And right now, I, along with a lot of people, are afraid of what’s coming. Heck, you’re scared of what’s happening? It’s already here!

With a worldwide pandemic upon us, some will perish, some will become mentally crippled, and some will thrive. The most predominant factor that will dictate the categories people fall into will be how well they negotiate in these and the coming times.

The following are a few insights to consider to increase the probability of getting through the Coronavirus pandemic.

Mindset

People are seeking calm and reassurance. If you’ve been reading my articles on body language, you know that the body always tries to stay in a state of comfort – it wants to feel safe and calm. And when it’s out of that state, it exhibits signals indicating that something’s wrong – that’s how you can decipher someone’s thoughts (i.e., by the body language signals they cast).

During this and any pandemic, people become scared. They’re afraid of the prevalent uncertainty that surrounds them. And thus, they don’t know what meaningful actions to take. So, they follow the herd, which in many cases doesn’t know where it’s headed. And that’s the void that you can step into. Show people, teach people, calm people, by giving them a sense of purpose and direction. Shine a new path of hope and safety for them to embark. They’ll trust you more when you negotiate with them.

Negotiation Strategies

Offers

In the coming months and years, some people will become less discerning about maximizing their gains versus losing an opportunity – because there will be a surplus of some big-ticket items (e.g., cars, etc.). When possible, negotiate with individuals that must move items quickly; less those items lose more value. And be mindful of the speed you use to make and accept offers, which will depend on whether you’re buying or selling. If you’re the seller and you have leverage, push to close the sale quickly. If you’re the buyer, let the seller sweat – move slower.

Cash

Having cash-in-hand will induce some people to lower their prices. To enhance that image, display the money when you’re at a close point of agreement. And then ask, as you show the cash, how about I give you ‘x’ right now (display the exact amount you intend to offer), as you extend the money to the person. Let it linger there for a moment to see if he accepts it. If he doesn’t take it after a few seconds, slowly begin to withdraw it and observe his body language. Note if he becomes nervous – that’ll be a sign that he’s grappling with indecision. You will have done two things with your offer and gesture. One, you’ll show him how close he is to getting something where he might not get anything. Two, your slow movement of withdrawing the money serves as a takeaway, a loss of something someone is about to incur. Psychologically, people will fight harder to keep from losing something than they will to acquire it. So, you have that factor in your favor too.

Takeaway

As indicated a moment ago. When someone senses loss, and it’s something they want, they become motivated to keep or acquire it. Once again, that’s the power of the takeaway. It implies that someone is about to lose something they want.

While this is a powerful tool in a negotiation, be mindful of not overusing it. Because, if you use it too frequently and still allow the other person to obtain what he wants, you’ll be teaching him to dismiss your takeaway. You will have devalued it. Thus, be aware of how and when you use it.

You, Thought Leader

Thought leadership is another form of negotiation. Because people follow the thought leaders that they trust. And they do so more in frightening times of reckoning.

On the back label of the products we consume, there are several factors listed for information purposes. There are nutritional facts, ingredients, and a ‘best by’ or expiration date. That information displays a sense of the product’s life cycle, and the continuum it’s on, along with its nutritional viability. It’s a way to set the expectation in someone’s mind for how long the product is usable. And that’s what you can do as a thought leader – reassure people that there’s no expiration on their health and financial future if they adopt specific procedures. To do that, you must be aware of reliable and current information that those who follow you can use. And that will enhance the perception of those with whom you negotiate.

Reflection

The thoughts on mindset, negotiation strategies, and thought leadership, are ways in which you can negotiate in frightening times and enhance the perception of your leadership abilities. To do so successfully, you must become well attuned to factual circumstances occurring around you. And, you must be aware of what those that follow you need and want – and don’t confuse those two. There’s a perspective difference in what people want versus what they need. If they truly need it but don’t want it, you may have a more difficult time getting them to accept it. That’s where your negotiation skills will become tested. In a best-case scenario, they’ll need and want your offering.

When we come through this pandemic, one day we’ll look back on it and think these times were not that bad. Time will be the healer of the pandemic image. Thus, no matter how bad a situation is when you’re going through it, those times always appear to be perilous. So, fret not. Instead, possess a healthy mindset that will insulate you from seeing unreasonable scary things ahead, and increase your negotiation skills (which will enhance your leadership abilities). By doing so, you’ll become better positioned to see it through (i.e., the pandemic). And everything will be right with the world.

 

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

#TheMasterNegotiator #GregWilliams #negotiation #Coronavirus #Recession #NegotiationSkills #Stress #Secrets #bodylanguage #csuitenetwork #thoughtcouncil #readingbodylanguage #Control #Conversations #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiation examples #Negotiation strategies #negotiation process #negotiation skills training #negotiation types #negotiation psychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

Categories
Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“This Is How To Unlock Secrets Hidden By Stress” – Negotiation Insight

“Secrets hidden by stress reveal themselves, once you unveil the stress behind which secrets hide.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

Click to get the book!

 

“This Is How To Unlock Secrets Hidden By Stress”

 

People become stressed for any number of reasons. It can occur due to their fear of upcoming interactions with others, especially with the Coronavirus pandemic plaguing people around the globe. And they can experience stress due to their attempts to conceal secrets or lies.

The point is, when you’re in the presence of someone displaying signs of stress, first, you should know what to observe. Then, you should be able to detect their source of stress. The reason being, the better you can understand someone’s source of motivation, the better you can understand what’s motivating their actions.

The following are body language signs highlighting the source that denote actions stemming from stress, and how you can use that information to uncover hidden secrets.

 

Stress From Current Environments

Some people experience stress in some environments due to their lack of assuredness about their placement. And that stems from how they compare themselves to others. If this person is concealing a secret, make him feel at ease before attempting to coerce it out of him. To do otherwise may cause him to bury his secret deeper.

 

Stammering/Forgetfulness

Another sign that stress induces is stammering and forgetfulness. Thus, when you encounter someone displaying these symptoms, recognize that they could be expressing discomfort.

Based on when the stammering or forgetfulness occurs, it may announce your relative closeness to hidden information. And the forgetfulness may also be the crutch they use as the excuse to keep from disclosing that information. If you sense that, and it’s crucial, probe to uncover what’s attempting to remain concealed. As you do, observe what becomes of the stammering. The more it occurs, the closer you’ll be to discovering what’s hidden.

 

Adam’s Apple/Swallowing

You can glean insights from observing someone’s Adam’s apple. As they speak, when stressed, they’ll tend to swallow more than previously. If stress is the cause, their swallowing action will be due to an effort to hydrate the throat.

Attempt to calm the individual by backing away from the subject that’s causing discomfort. And note the movement of their Adam’s apple once they reach a state of calm. If it noticeably dissipates, that will be an indication of what caused their stress. If it behooves your efforts to obtain the truth, ratchet up the tension by delving back into the story that caused the anxiety. You can engage in that yin and yang until you’re satisfied that you’ve obtained all of the truth.

 

Taking A Seat

Do you observe how someone sits in a chair? Do they plop into it, ease into it while gripping the arms of the chair (if there are arms)? If so, how much weight are they releasing when they sit? And how much pressure are they applying while gripping the arms of the chair? Those actions indicate how they feel at that moment.

Someone experiencing a higher degree of stress than usual may plop into a chair or grip its’ arms tightly. The person that’s stating that action is attempting to rid themselves of the load they’re carrying. That load may be mental due to stress. If you note those signs, act to uncover what may lurk beneath them.

 

Lip Chewing/Licking

Another possible sign of stress occurs when someone constantly licks their lips. This action stems from a lack of moisture in the mouth, which causes the lip-licking to occur. It can be one of the most accessible signs to detect because it’s literally right in front of you.

 

Holding/Rubbing Wrist

Supporting one’s wrist or rubbing it is another indicator that stress is prevalent. That action denotes an attempt to release the pressure that may stem from other parts of one’s body. Thus, it serves as a release valve.

If you observe this gesture, ask if everything is okay. And note how the person responds. If they question why you’re asking, they’re seeking input before giving information. That could be an indicator of their attempt to conceal information. If they state a reason for their action, they’re less guarded, but they may still be harboring something.

 

Averting Eyes

When you were younger and saw a scary movie, you averted your eyes to prevent seeing what alarmed you. That’s a natural instinctive reaction. Thus, when someone averts their eyes, they’re sending a signal indicating they don’t wish to engage at that moment. The degree of aversion depends on the culture and other social factors relevant to one’s geographical location.

By noting when someone averts their eyes, you can gain insight into what they may not wish to discuss. And, by signaling that such matters are topics they’d like to stay away from, they’re drawing attention to the fact that there may be something for you to probe. Assess if you should.

 

Uncovering Lies

You can use a combination of the insights mentioned to assist in uncovering lies. Observing the rate of swallowing, when someone averts their eyes, the degree they stammer, and how they sit in a chair, can be clues signaling you to pursue your current direction. It can also indicate that it’s time to change tactics.

The body wants to stay in a state of comfort. Thus, when someone’s body lacks tranquility, it emits signals indicating its efforts to return to a state of calm. Therefore, when someone lies, they display gestures that call attention to their efforts to prevent the truth from coming forward. Once you sense you’re on the trail of a lie, decide if it’s worth pursuing. But always take note of how the person reacted when they sensed that you were on to their untruthfulness.

 

Reflection

To understand someone’s body language, you must understand their baseline behavior. The way to gather that insight is to observe how they behave when they’re not in a state of stress. Based on that behavior, you’ll have something to compare their current actions.

Absent baseline information, compare ongoing interactions to what’s typical for the environment. Only then will you be able to accurately determine what causes them to act and react in the manner they do. And keep in mind that most people respond differently to feeling awkward than they do when they’re trying to conceal secrets. When the latter is crucial for you to uncover, be more observant of those signals.

To protect yourself better, be more observant of the signals others emit when they’re in your presence. In some cases, the clues they give off should set off alarms. In other situations, such messages may be an outreach for assistance. In either case, the more aware you are of them, the higher the sense of direction you’ll have. And everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

# Coronavirus #Recession #NegotiationSkills #Stress #Secrets #NegotiationSkills #csuitenetwork #thoughtcouncil #Bodylanguage #readingbodylanguage #Negotiation #Control #Conversations #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiation examples #Negotiation strategies #negotiation process #negotiation skills training #negotiation types #negotiation psychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

Categories
Body Language Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“Your Um Is The Killer Of Your Opportunities” – Negotiation Insight

“The quickest killer of your opportunities is not representing who you are in the moment.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language expert (Click to Tweet)        Click to get the book!

 

“Your Um Is The Killer Of Your Opportunities”

 

His ums were the killer of his present and future opportunities. Are you doing that to yours?

He passed out his presentation to the 12 participants in the room. He thought this is going to be a make or break opportunity for me. If I do well, my career could take off like a rocket! And then he started.

Um, good morning. Um, thank you for allowing me to present this morning. I know, um, you’re going to find what I have to say to be, um, very interesting. And in a moment, um, I’ll begin. But first, um, I’d like to ask you a question. One attendee leaned towards another and said, when is he going to talk about what we came to hear? And if he says, um, one more time, I’m going to scream!

Not only had the presenter alienated his audience, but he’d also decreased his chances for a successful outcome. His ums, and his delay in getting to the point was a turnoff.

Are your ums and dullness killing your opportunities?

People make snap judgments about you based on how quickly you captivate them, which compresses the way you speak, the words you use, and the pace at which you deliver your words. Thus, the reception of your message, in part, depends on those variables.

So, before you attempt to implement any activity that you want others to embrace, consider the variables that will move them to adopt your position faster, versus what might cause them to hesitate. Your outcome potential will hang in the balance.

 

The pace of speaking

Be it in a negotiation (you’re always negotiating), a personal conversation with friends or a loved one, the speed at which you speak influences the perception of the listener. Thus, if you talk too fast, and the receiver of your message can’t keep up, they may become frustrated inwardly and stop listening to your message. Worse, they may stop listening to you but continue issuing body language and nonverbal signals (i.e., head nodding, grunting, etc.). In that case, they’d give the appearance that they’re attuned to what you’re saying when in reality, they will have tuned you out.

When it comes to delivering your message at some point, stop and ask the other person a question about what they’ve heard and what they understand the intent to be of your message. Do that to discern their understanding and reception of your message. But even more, monitor their emotional displays (i.e., mouth agape, widen eyes, foot movement, etc.) to assess the impact your message is having on them. And you can take note of the expressions of different people in a larger audience to make the same assessment.

The point is, to deliver a concise message, you should consider matching the pace of its delivery to the speed the receiver needs to hear it. That means you should provide it at a pace that allows them to understand and sense it at an emotional level as the result of having received and perceived it. Sometimes that’ll mean talking quickly to induce excitement, or slowing down the tempo to produce a more solemn mode.

 

Filler Words

When you use filler words (i.e., ums, you know, etc.), those words can distract the listener from the message you’re delivering. And that distraction decreases the perception of you as someone knowledgeable about what you’re saying. Note: In a negotiation, if you wish to cast yourself as someone unsure of his position as a ploy, you might use filler words and stammer to enhance the effect of the role you’re playing. If you don’t wish to project that image, eliminate the fillers.

Outcomes

Another point to consider when you’re attempting to sway someone to adopt your position is how you’ll position the result of them doing so. By painting a picture of what the outcome might be if someone does or does not embrace your perspective, you cast their thoughts into the future. That’s a distinction to be made from having them reflect on their past, which is not bad in all cases.

By having someone focus on their future, you set the expectation for things to come, while allowing them to influence that occurrence. Thus, if you wanted them to see themselves in a better position in the future, depending on the individual, you might consider painting a future scene that’s bright with happiness, excitement, and worry-free. If you wanted them to see what they might forgo as the result of not adopting your suggestion, you might consider painting a doom and gloom picture. Just be aware that people tend to move away from something quicker than they’ll move towards something. That means they’re more likely to avoid pain before they seek pleasure.

 

Implementation

Once you’ve addressed the variables mentioned, give severe and prolonged consideration to how you’ll implement your plan, strategy, request, etc. In particular, think about the timing of your implementation. Ask yourself, how might it impact or be impacted by other occurrences? Who might be most upset or pleased by your application, and what might key people do to assist or challenge it?

To have the most significant opportunity of a successful implementation, you must consider the variables that will impact its chance to achieve the outcome you’re seeking. Then, you should address the potential negative influencers that might challenge it and addressing the concerns they have in opposition. That will require modifications to your plans. But that’ll still allow you to implement them with less resistance had you not addressed those that were in opposition. And that will enhance your chance of greater success.

Reflection

There will always be variables to address to overcome obstacles that’ll stand between what you want and what you have to do to obtain what you want. The better you are at addressing those variables and aligning the forces you’ll need to aid your efforts, the faster you’ll be at implementing more of your plans, with fewer obstacles, and more allies. And everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Killer #Opportunities #Ums #FillerWords #csuitenetwork #thoughtcouncil #Bodylanguage #readingbodylanguage #Negotiation #Control #Conversations #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiation examples #Negotiation strategies #negotiation process #negotiation skills training #negotiation types #negotiation psychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Categories
Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“This Is What Happens When You Abuse Compliments” – Negotiation Insight

“Compliments like smiles wear off if extended too long.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

(Click to get the book)

 

“This Is What Happens When You Abuse Compliments”

“You know what he was saying, right?” “He was complimenting me,” was the response. To which the retort was, “he said, you looked interesting, as a black man in a gold Mercedes. He wasn’t complimenting you. That was mockery! What did he want from you? I’m sure he was trying to persuade you to do something.”

 

Even if unintended, compliments tend to persuade the receiver to adopt a particular view of the sender. And in most situations, that opinion tends to be favorable. Even when an insidious compliment comes from an opponent, it can shift the trajectory of the interaction. Thus, with the best of intent, if you abuse the usage of complements, they can produce more harm than good.

Here’s what to consider when complimenting someone – especially if you don’t want to incur a backlash.

 

Listening/Hearing

Listen to what you’re hearing, and for what’s not said. That means, to understand the intent of the compliment better, seek to glean insight by observing the sender’s body language and other nonverbal cues. As an example, if the praise was about you, as the black man and the gold Mercedes, you might have detected the tone of the accolade, body language gestures that accompanied it, and any statements made immediately after that. That degree of awareness would have increased your intuition from which to assess the intent and sincerity of the compliment. After that, if you thought it was a mockery, you might have pushed back on its genuineness, or sought clarification about its intent.

If you compliment someone, and you sense they misperceive it, don’t offer another one to bolster the one before it. Make your sincere intent known about the initial one you made. If you don’t do that, you’ll continue slipping down a slope that could pull you deeper into a chaotic mess of unbelievability about your future compliments.

Tip – When in question, always listen intently to how something’s said, the body gestures and sounds that accompany it, and what precedes and follows it. By doing so, you’ll be able to discern better the intent of the words spoken.

 

Abuse of Compliments

Another concern to be mindful of, as the sender or receiver of compliments, is its frequency. If you’re overly infusive with your compliments, it can make you appear as though you may be ‘sucking up’ to someone. To that end, you should understand the personality of the individual to whom you’re complimenting. Some people don’t like the attention to themselves that compliments bring.

If you’re on the receiving end of compliments, once again, understand their intent. Question their validity, what the intention is to make you feel or do, and where the sender may be going with them. While some people are genuinely pleased about an aspect of your being, which causes them to extend a compliment to you, some know how to use tributes as a sly form of manipulation. If there’s any manipulation to occur, you should be the dapifer that determines when it happens. The point is, control all attempts when someone is attempting to manipulate you!

Suffice it to say, if you compliment someone, you should know the purpose of it, and so should the person to whom you give a compliment. The assessment and balance of your interactions and relationship will hang on that scale.

 

Complimentary Points To Consider

To give a compliment that has more pizzaz, consider these factors.

  1. Make your compliments personal. The more they address specific characteristics a person possesses, the higher the chance of it having a more impactful impression.
  2. Try to avoid compliments that speaks to someone’s physical appeal. If they possess a physical trait that’s genuinely appealing, they’ve more than likely heard what you’re saying from other people, which will lessen your compliment. Instead, focus your praises on their achievements and/or something about their demeanor that’s pleasing to you.
  3. When giving a compliment, highlight someone’s strengths. While you might say, “don’t worry, you’re getting better.” An endearment such as that can ring hollow. Instead, you might say, “you have improved significantly!” That type of statement has more energy in it, and it’s more uplifting.

Reflection

When extending praise, understand your intent, which means have a purpose in mind for why you’re offering it. It’s okay to compliment someone with a sincere intent in mind. Just be sure that they perceive it as such. If you sense that they don’t, make your meaning known by stating your intention and rectifying any ambiguity. The better you become at providing perceived sincerity when complimenting someone, the more the receiver will be enriched by them. That will bode well for you, your communication abilities, and the enhancement of your persona.

It’s always nice when you can genuinely compliment someone. Delivered and perceived in the right way, both you and the other person will get a good feeling stemming from your graciousness. And everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#compliment #abuse #csuitenetwork #thoughtcouncil #Bodylanguage #readingbodylanguage #Negotiations #Control #Conversations #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiation examples #Negotiation strategies #negotiation process #negotiation skills training #negotiation types #negotiation psychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

Categories
Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“How To Expose Hidden Secrets By Reading Body Language” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“Secrets can harm you. To uncover them, learn to read body language.” – Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)

 

“How To Expose Hidden Secrets By Reading Body Language”

 

To interpret someone’s body gestures accurately, you must understand the meaning of their movements and verbal utterances. And that’s how you expose their hidden secrets. Because reading body language is like peeping into someone’s mind, it’s a skill that enhances your negotiation efforts too. To interpret someone’s body language accurately, you should observe the following.

 

Using Power Words

You can’t make me. Oh, yes, I can. No, you can’t. You might remember hearing such words when you were a kid. During such times, when kids spoke those words, they were spurred to adopt one position versus another. And even though you’re not a kid any longer, you can still use words to motivate someone to expose themselves. But wait, you may be thinking – this is about reading body language. And you’re right, it is. You can use words, coupled with your body language gestures, to create emotional movement and displays in others. And that’s how you can unlock their hidden secrets.

Power words (e.g., I will, I’m sure, that’s right) make you appear more assured of your position, compared to assertions that project a less compelling image (e.g., maybe, I think, possibly). When you use powerful words, coupled with a decisive body language gesture and verbal signaling (i.e., leaning forward, speaking more forcibly and at a quickened pace), you promote a defiant image that signals, don’t be trivial with me – I’m on to you. That persona enhances the thought that you may know more than your target suspects. If you intentionally choose to be less challenging and decided to use less forceful words, you’d adopt a softer body language posture to affect your façade, one that was less in-your-face.

Click here to watch a brief video about Power Words.

Body Language

Inducing Fear

Think of a growling dog for a moment. Did you imagine saliva oozing out of its mouth? If you’ve ever had a bad experience with a dog that frightened you, you probably had a flashback to that experience a moment ago. How did you feel then and how do you feel right now? Did your heart rate increase then? Is it elevated right now, just thinking about the situation?

Fear shows itself through widened eyes, quick breathing, elevated perspiration. If an attempt to mask it occurs, it may also show through a change in speech pace, and more touching of one’s self. Those actions are an unconscious attempt to relieve the stress that one is experiencing.

You can induce the fear factor into a discussion by injecting an unpleasant memory into the mind of your target, and implying that you know they’re not truthful with you. To enhance your efforts, use assumptive questions (questions that suggest you know more than you’re letting on – e.g., you know I know you’re not telling me the real story – don’t you?) Lean forward as you make your pronouncement. And watch the demeanor the person adopts. Note if they appear frightened per the signs mentioned (e.g., widening of the eyes, mouth agape, clutching themselves for protection or comfort) to indicate that.

Stance/Demeanor

I’ve already mentioned a few ways you can solicit information to unlock secrets based on the posture you adopt (i.e., leaning forward, back, coupled with using the appropriate words to suit the persona you wish to project, etc.). The following are additional ways to propel your image and to unlock someone’s secrets.

Strong Image – Hands on your hips, a snarl on your face, coupled with words that are sharp, short, and poignant – This image conveys a no-nonsense stance. And it can be used when attempting to enhance the intimidation factor in someone.

 

Subdued Image – Hands spread apart, palms turned upward, a smile on your face – This persona signifies that you’re open to listening to the other person’s side of a story. Adopt this demeanor when you’ve gained the cooperation of the other party. Do it to display that you’re not out to harm him as the result of him telling you his secret.

 

Be Reflective – People unconsciously adhere to the wishes of others when they perceive their actions stemming from others that they’ve emitted. Thus, to control someone’s thought process better, mimic their movements and words to convey that the two of you are alike. Subliminally, they’ll see their reflection in you and open up. But, if after several occurrences of mimicking them, they don’t open up, stop imitating them. Instead, initiate a more doubting posture (e.g., crossing your arms, closing your hands to indicate how dire the situation is, etc.).

When that person begins to mirror your movements, start questioning them more intensely. At that point, they’ve started to follow your lead, which means they’re more susceptible to being more truthful. Be aware of the time spent in your attempts to extract someone’s secrets. That will also have an impact on their willingness to separate themselves from their secrets.

 

Micro-expressions

There are seven micro-expressions generic to everyone on earth – they’re displayed approximately for one-quarter of a second. That means everyone will react the same way to the same stimuli no matter where they live in the world. Once you become astute at identifying micro-expressions, you’ll have additional insight per someone’s inner emotional state. The seven micro-expressions are.

  • Fear – When detecting genuine fear, look for raised eyebrows, widened eyes, and parted lips with the bottom lip protruding downward.
  • Anger – Anger is denoted by lowered eyebrows and flaring nostrils reminiscent of a bull before charging.
  • Disgust – This micro-expression is displayed by the upper lip turned up, while the nose is wrinkled.
  • Surprise – You’ll recognize surprise through raised eyebrows, wide eyes, and open mouth.
  • Contempt – This gesture appears as a sneer. You’ll note it by one corner of the mouth turned upward.
  • Sadness – Note sadness through drooping eyelids and downturned lips. A change in voice inflection and tonality may also accompany genuine sorrow.
  • Happiness – Happiness is shown through wide-eyes with crow’s feet or wrinkles at their corners, a smile, and raised cheeks. A degree of exuberance may also accompany this gesture.

Click here to hear more about the seven micro-expressions that are generic to everyone on earth.

 

Reflection

When you’re questioning someone, their heightening degree of stress signals how close you are to exposing their secrets. Be aware of those signals. Noting them will allow you to unlock more secrets. It will also be an indicator that you’re reading their body language accurately. And everything will be right with the world.

 

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Secrets #csuitenetwork #thoughtcouncil #Bodylanguage #readingbodylanguage #Negotiations #Control #Conversations #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiation examples #Negotiation strategies #negotiation process #negotiation skills training #negotiation types #negotiation psychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

Categories
Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“To Confront Biases Better – Know How To Empower Truth“ – Negotiation Insight

“Before confronting someone’s biases, know the sources of their beliefs.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)  (Click to get the book)

 

 

No matter if you’re negotiating (you’re always negotiating) or in the most serene environment you can imagine, biases confront you. They appear in the form of how others treat you, think about you, and what they say to other people about you. Even if they don’t know you, sometimes they’ve prejudged you based on the biases they have about you. Thus, you should anticipate how people will engage you and how you’ll address them before entering into their domain. You should also do so during the interaction you have with them. That’s especially true when doing so may enhance or prevent opportunities that might await you. One way to do that is to empower the truth as your aide. That means confronting them with the facts of reality. But as we know, some people create alternative realities as their truth. Thus, you should also be astute about the following.

 

Freudian Slips

When people speak, their words represent the thoughts they’re having. Therefore, if someone makes a Freudian slip (e.g., I think John is great – when they meant to say Bob), the ‘slip’ discloses what was residing in their unconscious mind. And thus, their statement reveals their hidden sentiments about John, not Bob. While they may think Bob is great, too, John is more prominent in their mind. That means the person has higher thoughts about John. And that can prove to be valuable information.

So, what can you do with this information? You can silently thank that person for revealing their real sentiments, knowing that you’ve uncovered their true feelings. Or, you can ask him why he called one name when he meant another (do that while observing how he responds to your query). Note if he becomes frustrated, exasperated, or unnerved? If so, you’ve more than likely probed deeper into beliefs that he’d rather not have exposed. If you believe his bias lacks fairness, and you think it’s appropriate, confront him about it. While doing so, leave room for him to become empowered. Do that by offering him truthful information about his opinion, and back it up with proof. Then, note to what degree, if any, he alters his perspective. His response and altered disposition will lend insight into the type of mindset you’re dealing with, which will allow you to assess the degree of time you’ll exhaust in altering his views. In some cases, it’ll be better to move on. For you, per him, the opinion of the dead can’t be changed.

 

Body Language Gestures That Might Indicate Biases

While body language gestures can convey an array of sentiments, those that follow indicate a dislike for one in the presence of another.

Nose – The upturned wrinkling of one’s nose indicates that a person finds something unpleasant. If the gesture occurs when you enter that person’s environment, he’s signaling displeasure with you. And it’s most likely revealing a bias the person possesses about you.

Mouth – If you observe one corner of someone’s mouth momentarily turning upward, he’s displaying a signal of contempt. That means he’s disgusted by something he perceives about you. If it occurs multiple times when you speak or when you enter his environment, take note of the action. He may not be aware of it consciously, but he’s signaling his bias. And that’s information you can use.

Click here to watch a brief video about disgust.  

Feet – When people are in small groups, and they’re facing one another, their feet will point towards the most thought-provoking person. Not only is it a way to gain insight into whom they may admire at that time, but it also gives insight into the thoughts that others accept. And that can become a barometer as to how well your sentiments will be received. Thus, if they ignore you, the indication might be that you’re not presenting value per the discussion. It might also indicate that others don’t perceive you as being up to their level. Regardless, be mindful of what’s occurring. And, assess how you’ll use that insight to identify why others might be displaying a bias towards you.

 

While these gestures don’t necessarily have to indicate a definitive bias, they can give you insight per where one’s thought may lie about you. If you’re unsure of one’s intent, test them. Do that by observing their response to others in the environment, whom they gravitate to, and the views of those that they accept. That information will give you additional insight, which may serve as confirmation about that person’s perspective.

 

Reflection

No matter the environment, expect biases to be part of it. Thus, to help yourself, be observant about the body language of others, and adopt procedures to overcome the prejudices they may have about you. The insights mentioned will allow you to do just that.

When using these insights, know that exposing someone to the truth about their beliefs may cause them to reject you. But when confronted by practical information, unless they don’t want to accept your premise due to their biases, they will be left to look foolish. And that will leave them out of step with reality. If that’s so, it may be the best place to dispense of them – move on. Don’t waste your time with them. The people that accept your premise will be the individuals that display an open mind. They’ll also be the ones that’ll aide you most in your quest. And everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Biaes #Truth #csuitenetwork #thoughtcouncil #Bodylanguage #readingbodylanguage #Negotiations #Control #Conversations #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiation examples #Negotiation strategies #negotiation process #negotiation skills training #negotiation types #negotiation psychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

Categories
Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“How To Avoid Assault By Observing Aggressive Body Language” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“To foretell assaults, observe someone’s body language. All insights into someone’s mind starts there.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)       (Click to get the book)

 

 

“How To Avoid Assault By Observing Aggressive Body Language”

 

One moment, he was standing there, and everything was fine. Then, in the blink of an eye, he was punched in his eye. As he winced in pain, he thought, I didn’t see that coming. His lack of focus on the changing demeanor of his assailant led him to be unprepared. And now, he was under attack.

Such assaults can occur in business settings and your personal life. And while they may not always be physical, the emotional pain caused by such attacks can still be traumatic. But there are ways you can avoid potential assault, be it verbal or physical, by observing body language that foretells aggressive behavior.

 

Facial Features

Wincing – Imagine for a moment that some form of annoyance happens to you. What’s your reaction? Depending on the stimuli you imagined, you may have swiped it away, winced at it, or made another gesture to ward it away. Wincing is one such gesture that indicates someone’s annoyance. When you see it, understand what it means and what thoughts may be occurring in the mind of the person displaying the gesture. He’s just given you a glimpse into his mind, notice it and heed the signal he’s sending. It could be the moment a situation begins to escalate to aggressiveness.

 

Eyes – When someone narrows their eyes and become fixated on you, they’re pinpointing their focus and attention. That means, in their mind, they’re dispersing outside distractions so they can lend their full attention to what’s occurring between you and them. If this happens in a situation that’s begun to become heated, interject an action to defuse it, or prepare for the festering aggression that will follow.

 

Hands

Someone’s hands can be the most reliable indicator that they’re about to become aggressive, which can then lead to an assault. If you observe someone flexing their hand(s), opening and closing it, take note of the speed at which it occurs. The faster the speed, the more aggressive will be the behavior that follows. The moment someone’s hands close into fists can indeed indicate that there may only be seconds before an attack occurs. Before that happens, take steps to escape the environment or prepare to defend yourself. An alternative is to go on the offense. That can take the form of talking the other party down or taking physical action before he initiates his. Either way, the more equipped you are for the inevitable, the better positioned you’ll be to deal with it.

 

Feet

When two people are confronting one another, and both individuals have their feet directly aligned with the other person, they are in full commitment to each other. That means, if you observe someone pointing their foot away from you after they previously had their feet aligned directly with yours, they’re in the process of disengaging. That doesn’t mean you’re out of harm’s way. They could deliver a sucker punch, physical or verbal, as they depart. So, don’t let your guard down until you’re sure of the act they intend to commit has occurred, and you know you’re safe.

Stance

Have you observed when two professional fighters are brought to the center of the ring to hear the rules before the fight confront one another? They cast a no-nonsense demeanor that’s usually accompanied by a death stare to indicate the seriousness that they’re adopting for the battle to come. To a degree, some of the posturing’s are an attempt to psychologically defuse the other fighter’s mental energy, which would cause him to doubt himself and whether he can win against such a worthy opponent.

Anytime you’re in an environment when you note such actions (i.e., someone, in your face), they’re also sending you a message. If you step back, you’re saying, take my space, and I’ll back down. If you hold your ground by not moving, you’re stating, I’m not backing down from you, nor I’m I afraid. Now, what are you going to do? Again, be prepared for what may occur next. If you’ve observed other signs of aggression, at this point, they may escalate or deescalate. Be ready in either case to take control of the situation.

Contradictions

Contradictions can lead to frustration, which can serve as a vehicle that delivers a crisis in confidence. When people become frustrated, they lose a form of rationality. That means, they can become more mentally unstable, which can lead to aggressive actions that they might not have participated in if they were in a calmer state of mind.

Always be aware of someone’s heightening level of frustration. It can be the bellwether to assault-like behavior to come. By becoming psycho astute, which means paying attention to the changing psychological mood of other people, you’ll enhance your vigilance about the mental mood shift of others before it occurs.

 

Trigger Words

Words cause reactions in people. And some words will generate more of an emotional charge than others. To that point, be aware of terms or phrases that trigger someone to adopt a negative point of view. Such as the ‘N’ word or alligator bait with some people of color, holy roller, or bible thumper for those of some religious persuasions, and Ayrab or Abbie of people from other ethnicities – all such words or phrases can lead one to adopt an unreceptive demeanor. Then, depending on that person’s temperament, it can lead to more significant hostile actions.

As the world becomes smaller through enhanced communication platforms, you should also be aware of how the same words can possess different meanings to people around the globe. In some cases, those words are the doorway to insults, while in other environments throughout the world, they may solicit a mild reproach or lightheartedness. To avoid a costly pitfall, be aware of the meaning that certain words cast.

 

Reflection

An environment can become hostile at a moment’s notice, and aggression can ensue that leads to an assault. It can do so while not sounding an alarm about the pending state of change to come. And, if you don’t heed such signs, you leave yourself open to the whims of chance, and that can lead to and leave you in an unwanted place and position.

But if you’re aware of the body language and verbal cues mentioned and you adopt controlling actions, you’ll be more aware of their pending occurrence. That will give you more time to react and control imminent assaults. To untie that knot, once you sense mental angst turning into a potential attack, initiate action. It can be in the form of taking a more forceful position (beware of escalating the situation if you do), or it can be in the way of adopting a milder demeanor (be aware of being perceived as someone weak by the other entity). The point is, take action to confront it. And everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Assault #csuitenetwork #thoughtcouncil #Bodylanguage #readingbodylanguage #Negotiations #Control #Conversations #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiation examples #Negotiation strategies #negotiation process #negotiation skills training #negotiation types #negotiation psychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself

 

 

 

 

Categories
Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

“7 Wicked Strategies To Unlock Non-Crisis Negotiations” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

“The difference between a crisis and a non-crisis is the difference in perception. To be better prepared to address either, no what separates them.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert  (Click to Tweet)

 

 

 

Click here to get the book

 

 

“7 Wicked Strategies To Unlock Non-Crisis Negotiations”

 

When you engage in crisis negotiation, there’s usually less time to consider what strategies you’ll employ compared to when you negotiate in a non-crisis environment. But, just because a non-crisis negotiation should be less stressful doesn’t mean you should lower your guard.

The following are seven negotiation strategies to consider when negotiating in non-crisis negotiations.

 

Mindset/Mindfulness

While non-crisis negotiations may not possess the level of stress of crisis discussions, don’t let your demeanor laps into a state of complacency. This means, plan for a less stressful engagement but be prepared for circumstances that might cause provocations. Also, monitor your state of mind before and during the negotiation. Be very much aware of how you’re thinking, where your thoughts are leading you, and what mental interventions might occur to alter any thought path you’re on. You want to be aware of as many variables that might impact your thoughts, so you’re able to control them better.

 

Social Media

Social media is a powerful tool. You can use it to soften or alter the perspective of those against whom you’ll be negotiating, and to have your viewpoint enhanced. In essence, you can use it as a tool to position the opposing side to be viewed in a particular manner – one that suits your purpose. Another tactic is to have surrogates post positive attributes about you and your position.

 

Questions/Statements

The questions you ask, their timing, along with statements you make, can play a pivotal role in the flow and outcome of a negotiation.

 

Assumptive Questions – You can ask assumptive questions, questions that give the appearance that you may know more than you’ve disclosed (e.g., you’ve awarded this type of contract with a high dollar amount in the past, right?). By posing a question in that manner, the opposition can answer in the affirmative, hesitate in responding, or deny your assertion. Either way, you’ll gain information that you can use in the negotiation. And, a bonus will occur in causing the other side to wonder what additional insights you might have that you’ve not disclosed.

Implied Questions – Ask questions that imply an answer (e.g., why would you only focus on one company that might be involved in corruption, if you state you’re concerned about business fraud throughout the country?) The hidden implication is, you weren’t worried about business crime, you had other thoughts that motivated your actions.

Statements – To alter the momentum of your opponent, make false statements to which he has to respond. If he doesn’t retort, his point is clouded, and your comment becomes perceived as truthful. The point is, by having the other negotiator focus on your false accounts, he’ll have to extend time refuting them. That’ll give you more time to regain momentum in the negotiation. Just be cautious about how outlandish your assertions are. If they’re too far out of the realm of reasoning, you’ll appear buffoonish.

 

Always attempt to ask questions and make statements when they have the most significant impact on the negotiation.

 

 

Timing of Negotiation

There will be optimum times when you should negotiate. Such times will occur when you’re in a dominant position (i.e., you have something that the other negotiator must have quickly), the other negotiator is weakened by internal or external forces (e.g., they need to complete your negotiation to move to something more important). Whatever sources might cause you to have an advantage at a particular time, seek them out – and negotiate then. Doing so will enhance your negotiation efforts.

 

Single Versus Team Negotiations

The dynamics of a negotiation change whenever multiple people are involved. Even when everyone on your side or that of the opposing party is in agreement about how the negotiation will unfold, there will be occasions when someone says or does something unexpected. Prepare for such occurrences, and when they materialize, take advantage or squelch them.

 

When you’re alone negotiating against a team, spread your materials out. You want to take up space to combat the appearance of a numerical disadvantage. The intent is to convey mentally and visually that they’re more resources on your side than just you. Psychologically, this will give the appearance that you’re not alone. Also, to strengthen your persona, act with extreme confidence. Your silent message is, you’re not afraid because of the other side’s numerical advantage – you’re ready, prepared, and able to take them on.

 

 

Body Language and Nonverbal Cues

When people are in a nonstressful environment, they tend to relax. That’s why in non-crisis negotiations, you should be mindful of when discussions become stressful. There will be degrees of stress – they occur in most negotiations. But if it elevates to an unwarranted point, you should question why it happened and what’s causing it to ensue. The ‘why’ and ‘what’ will offer insight into having something exposed that the other negotiator might want under wraps.

 

 

Breathing – When face-to-face or engaged in phone negotiations, take note of the other negotiator’s breathing patterns. At the moment they become short and laboring, he’s entering into a mode of stressfulness. That may be due to his uncomfortableness about the discussion or something he senses that he’d rather avoid. And that’s the reason you should note it. You may be on to an aspect of the negotiation that warrants more in-depth inspection.

 

Word Choice/Speech Pace – The words a person uses conveys his thinking and how he chooses to represent his thoughts. Thus, when a person begins to speak more deliberately, ask yourself why he’s doing so. Question why he’s cautious about the word choices he uses, and what’s caused him to become more deliberate. Such clues will be the gateway from which more significant insights will follow. Note their occurrence and lineup.

 

Perspiration and Fidgeting – Another sign of stress reveals itself in self-touching (i.e., forehead, mouth, rubbing eyes, arms, hands, etc.) It can also be seen in someone needlessly fidgeting while standing or sitting. Again, note when this occurs, it indicates a mental shift in the perspective of the person displaying the action.

 

Negotiation Baiting

Baiting is a strategy employed by savvy negotiators to pull the opposing negotiator into a disadvantaging position. You’d use it by baiting that negotiator to adopt a perspective that appears out of step with commonly held beliefs of the masses or whomever you’re attempting to sway. By positioning him in that manner, his views also seem to be outside the bounds of normalcy, and thus he appears less appealing.

 

Reflection

In every environment, there’s a cascade of information to glean about an individual. That’ll give you great insights into how you might motivate that person to adopt one action versus another. By using the prior suggestions, you’ll have a less challenging time in persuading someone to implement your perspective. And everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://anchor.fm/themasternegotiator

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

 

#Crisis #Strategies #csuitenetwork #thoughtcouncil #Bodylanguage #readingbodylanguage #Negotiations #Control #Conversations #NegotiationStrategies #NegotiationProcess #NegotiationSkillsTraining #NegotiationExamples #NegotiationTypes #ReadingBodyLanguage #BodyLanguage #Nonverbal #Negotiate #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #Negotiator #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #BodyLanguageExpert #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #GregWilliams #success #negotiation examples #Negotiation strategies #negotiation process #negotiation skills training #negotiation types #negotiation psychology #Howtowinmore #self-improvement #howtodealwithdifficultpeople #Self-development #Howtocontrolanegotiation #howtobesuccessful #HowToImproveyourself