Standards Are for Quitters

The Power of Gut-Driven Leadership

NOTE: Sarcasm in management, the eighth out of ten articles on the weird way to view leadership

Standards? Best practices? Benchmarks? Please, those are crutches for the unimaginative and the faint of heart. For the true leaders among us, standards are nothing more than speed bumps on the road to greatness. Why bog yourself down with “measurable goals” and “objective evaluations” when your gut instinct has already assured you that everything is unfolding exactly as it should?

Who Needs Standards When You’ve Got Unyielding Confidence?

Standards are just limits dressed up in fancy jargon. They’re the nagging voices of mediocrity whispering that maybe, just maybe, things could be better. But for leaders who know they’re always right, standards are irrelevant. The only real standard is your gut feeling. And if your gut says that what you’re doing is brilliant, why let arbitrary expectations stand in the way?

Benchmarks Are for People Who Doubt Themselves

Benchmarks serve only one purpose: to make people feel like they aren’t quite there yet. But real leaders don’t need those pesky reminders—they’re already there, wherever that is. Setting a benchmark would imply there’s something to reach for, some elusive “better” waiting to be achieved. But if you’re already at the peak of your powers, why waste time measuring? Go with your gut, because it never needs validation from anything as flimsy as numbers or data.

Best Practices? More Like Boring Practices

“Best practices” are just a collection of other people’s old ideas—predictable, tired, and downright uninspired. Why settle for doing what’s been done before when you can blaze a new trail entirely of your own invention? Your gut isn’t interested in what’s been proven to work; it’s interested in what feels right in the moment. Sure, it might look like chaos to the untrained eye, but to you, it’s pure, unfiltered genius.

Standards Just Get in the Way of Perfectly Good Spontaneity

A real gut-driven leader doesn’t waste time on rigid “rules” or “standards.” Planning is overrated, and sticking to a plan? Well, that’s just plain restrictive. After all, some of the best ideas come when you’re flying by the seat of your pants. Why agonize over rules when you can simply create your own rules as you go along? Gut-driven leadership means embracing the thrill of spontaneity and trusting that things will magically work out just fine.

Accountability Is Optional When You’re Always Right

Standards have this nasty habit of holding people accountable. But when you’re leading from the gut, accountability is a non-issue. Who needs to track performance or measure results when you’re absolutely certain that your decisions are golden? Accountability just slows things down, like dragging an anchor behind a perfectly good ship. Trust your gut, ignore the data, and let everyone else marvel at your boundless self-assurance.

If It Feels Right, It Must Be Right

Metrics and data are for people who lack intuition. If it feels right in your gut, then it is right. It’s an infallible system. Who cares if there’s no logical basis for a decision when it feels solid on a purely instinctual level? Numbers can be manipulated, trends can shift, but your gut? It’s a rock—an unyielding source of “truth” that requires no validation from anyone or anything else.

The Freedom of Gut-Driven Leadership

Imagine the freedom of leading without the weight of standards pressing down on you. There’s no red tape, no unnecessary second-guessing, just pure, unrestrained action. You make a decision, and that decision is final because your gut told you so. And since your gut is never wrong, why would you ever look back or reconsider? The freedom to ignore standards is a gift that only the truly enlightened leaders allow themselves.

In Summary: Who Needs Standards When You’ve Got Vision?

In a world obsessed with standards and benchmarks, you stand as a shining example of fearless leadership. Standards are for people who don’t trust their instincts; you, however, have chosen a higher path. Your gut is your compass, your barometer, and your guiding light. With this kind of unshakable self-assurance, who needs standards? The rest of the world is too busy tracking progress and measuring success, while you’re simply basking in the glory of your own gut-driven brilliance.

Confidence Over Competence

Why Try Harder When You’re Already Perfect?

NOTE: This is the seventh of ten articles on the sarcastic way to discuss management

Who needs competence when confidence can get you everywhere you want to go? Real go-getters know that the best way to win in life is to skip the whole “learning” and “growing” thing altogether and just go straight to being amazing. Improvement is for those who doubt themselves, but you? You’re practically a genius, and it would be a shame to let pesky facts or “hard truths” interfere with that blissful reality.

Improvement? Overrated. Just Assume You’re Brilliant

There’s a certain kind of magic in assuming you’ve already nailed it. Why mess with success by entertaining the possibility that you might need to grow? Growth, after all, is for people who have room to improve. Not you. You’re already operating at peak performance—whether anyone else can see it or not. Self-awareness only opens the door to pesky doubts, and who needs that negativity? Confidence, unlike competence, requires zero effort and brings with it all the warmth and satisfaction of genuine accomplishment.

Who Needs Facts When You Have Unwavering Belief?

Facts are so cumbersome. They get in the way of perfectly good confidence. Why burden yourself with inconvenient realities when you can glide through life on the sheer power of self-assurance? Just think of all the mental energy saved by not bothering with things like “accuracy” or “realistic assessments.” Facts may be for scientists, but you’re far too busy being effortlessly brilliant. Besides, facts change. Your confidence? Unbreakable.

Feedback? Please, Only Amateurs Seek External Validation

Let’s talk about feedback, the favorite tool of those who lack conviction. Why go fishing for opinions from others when you’ve already established, quite conclusively, that you’re exceptional? Feedback is just a gateway to second-guessing, a thinly disguised attempt by others to throw you off your game. Real leaders don’t look for validation; they exude confidence so deeply rooted that it’s immune to any outside critique. After all, if you’re already perfect, what could anyone else possibly add?

Self-Awareness: A Perilous Path to Self-Doubt

It’s no secret that self-awareness is a dangerous road. Once you start down that path, you risk becoming aware of flaws. And flaws, as everyone knows, are the enemy of true confidence. Why reflect on your actions, your knowledge, or your skill level when you could simply assume they’re flawless? Self-awareness might help some people become better, but for you, it’s a slippery slope to uncertainty. And there’s nothing more damaging to the ego than an unwelcome dose of reality.

Competence? Optional. Confidence? Essential.

If you’re choosing between competence and confidence, the answer is obvious. Competence requires time, training, and ongoing effort. Confidence, on the other hand, only requires the unwavering belief that you’re fantastic just as you are. People often say “Fake it till you make it,” but why bother with the “make it” part? Just keep faking it with unshakable confidence, and you’ll never have to actually be competent. The beauty of confidence is that it looks exactly like expertise to the untrained eye.

Ignorance as a Warm, Cozy Blanket

Facts and feedback may keep some people up at night, but you? You’re wrapped in the warm blanket of blissful ignorance. In this wonderful state, you’re immune to the harsh truths that might suggest a need for change or effort. You don’t need the discomfort of acknowledging gaps in your knowledge or skill set. Ignorance keeps you cozy, content, and confident—a combination that’s absolutely unbeatable.

So, Why Try Harder When You’ve Already “Arrived”?

In a world obsessed with competence, you’re a refreshing reminder that self-assurance is all it really takes. Improvement, self-reflection, and hard truths are for people with doubt. But for those blessed with unyielding confidence, there’s no need to lift a finger. After all, you’ve already nailed it—or at least, you believe you have—and in the end, that’s all that really matters.

So, here’s to the path less traveled, the one that skips all the hard work and lands you at the summit of self-belief. Competence might be a journey, but confidence is a destination—and you’ve already arrived.