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How to Listen Better to Win More Negotiations

“When asking questions, listen to the response! Be sure to hear the meaning and any hidden meaning in the message you received.” –Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

To win more negotiations, listen better. When you negotiate, how well do you listen? The better you listen, the more negotiations you’ll win.

… but he didn’t answer the question! Good negotiators are very adept at diverting questions that don’t serve their purpose. In some cases, they’ll give superficial responses that appear to answer the question, or like a good magician, draw your attention in another direction without you noticing that they’ve done so.

To enhance the probability of winning more negotiations, listen to how questions are answered, and listen to the words used to represent the answers. In so doing, you’ll gain invaluable insight into hidden meanings and the thought process behind those meanings.

Listen to how questions are answered:

Take note to what degree a question is answered, avoided, and/or modified. As an example, if you ask, “Is that your best offer?” You might receive several responses:

A.) In the past, that’s as much as we’ve paid.

B.) Due to our current ‘situation’, we have a ceiling on the amount we can pay.

C.) Other vendors/suppliers are accepting our price structure.

In each of the above answers, you received a response to your question but what you did not receive was a direct answer to your question. Depending on your alertness or how diligent you wanted to appear, you might rephrase the question, point out that you’d not received an answer to it, or accept the answer given in order to address the situation from another perspective. The course of action you adopt should be aligned with how you wished to position yourself and the person with whom you’re negotiating to enhance your negotiation position.

 Listen to the words used to answer questions:

Words are the representation of the thoughts being conveyed. In the above answers, the word choice conveyed additional insight per how that person was thinking. In response ‘A’, the information conveyed is stating, “That’s our norm.” It could also be perceived as, you shouldn’t consider going outside of the norm. Conform to our standards.

In response ‘B’, the subliminal message is, “We’re in a challenging time, please bear with us. Help us by being understanding.” If you acquiesce, you might attempt to acquire chits that can be used in future negotiations. If you do so, attempt to instill in the current negotiation when and how you might use such chits. Keep in mind, you’ll also be setting a precedent to ‘help them’ again in the future, since you did so this time.

Depending on the value of your offer, you could position it so that it’s seen as ‘added value’ that warrants a ‘higher investment’ on the part of the purchaser, or one that you can fit into the current pricing structure because of the reason that’s best suited for the situation and your purpose. The point is, after you’ve gleaned the additional information based on how your questions are answered, you have a better understanding of how to position yourself.

You make decisions based on your interpretation of the situations you’re in. Then, based on your interpretation, you decide how you’ll act and react to situations. Thus, you and only you control your actions in a negotiation. So, to control more of the aspects of the negotiation, listen to the meanings and hidden meanings in the answers given by the other negotiator. Your reward will be in winning more negotiations … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

 

 

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Growth Human Resources Management Personal Development

Trust Is Essential for the Health of an Organization – Part 2

In a recent blog I promised to expand and clarify how a leader can, and must, predictably manage the variation in trust to produce desired results.  Therefore, the purpose of this 4-part series of blogs is to clarify why trust is so important, define and appreciate a definition for trust, to clarify the most effective way to think about trust, and to provide a framework for a predictable method for building and maintaining trust.  It needs to be predictable.

To accomplish this requires two important sets of ideas.   The first is an appreciation of the right definition of trust. We adopted The International Association of Business Communicators definition of trust: “a willingness to be vulnerable because of the presence of integrity, concern, competence and shared objectives.”

Second, I suggested we adopt a leadership structure of THINK – BEHAVE – IMPROVE (TBI). This structure will give us an introduction to how an optimum leader thinks, how an optimum leader behaves and how an optimum leader acts to improve both behaviors and the system within which they and their team members operate.  In this blog we will expand and clarify the THINK portion of the structure.

Leadership theory is so challenging because it’s paradoxical. We want control, but we don’t want micro-management.  We want freedom to act, but we must avoid chaos.  What is the best way of thinking about the world (about people and problems) that will enable us to manage the variation in trust and deal with the complexity and the paradox?  The answer is ‘systems thinking.’

As recently as 2012, a nurse, in an Ohio Hospital, accidently discarded a kidney that was awaiting a transplant and had been provided by a living donor.  The nurse had been on break, had been replaced by a different nurse, and was therefore unaware the kidney was submerged in an ice filled sludge.  She purposely disposed of the contents into a disposal hopper thinking the kidney was still in the operating room because “that’s what usually happens.”

The hospital suspended the two nurses after the incident; one was later fired, and the other resigned.  Furthermore, a surgeon was stripped of his title as director of some surgical services.  What a tragedy on many levels.

The nurse who discarded the kidney had walked past a doctor and other nurses carrying the container.  Should someone have noticed?  Should someone have said something?  How was she to know?  If we embrace the typical “industrial age” model of management, which uses command and control leadership strategies and focuses on holding people accountable for results, the act of firing the nurse makes total sense.  The general rule in this model is: “results were not achieved and someone (or perhaps multiple people) must be at fault!”  That’s the prevalent philosophy most of us were taught.  That model continues to dominate in our schools and our organizations yet today, i.e. “someone must be held accountable for the results.”  This model cannot create optimum trust.

Systems thinking is a way to see the world recognizing the interdependency of the parts of the whole. The interdependency idea helps us to realize that each part of the system (each employee) is impacted by and can impact all the other parts.  This idea makes cooperation and the quality of communication essential for achievement of the aim or purpose for which the system was created. Everyone cooperating and communicating fosters trust.

The industrial age model can be described using two different metaphors.  The first, “an organization is like a machine”. In this metaphor all parts can be individually evaluated for efficiency and effectiveness and are easily replaceable.  Furthermore, the parts serve no purpose on their own.  The parts each perform only to serve the machine.  They cannot make independent decisions.  Management is by domination.  The parts are dominated by their position in the workings of the machine.

The second metaphor is: “organization is like a human body”.  This is where the parts (the organs, the extremities) have no other purpose than to serve the whole.  Management of the parts is by command and control.  The parts serve the “head” because the “head” makes all decisions.  The parts have no decision-making skill nor purpose separate from serving the “head”.

A more useful metaphor for the systems thinking approach is “an organization is like an orchestra”.   In this metaphor the parts can exercise choice.  An orchestra and an organization are social systems.  A social system is self-organizing and self-regulating.  The parts cannot be controlled.  They instead can be influenced because they all have choice.  They can choose to serve the community (and the customer).  The quality of the interactions and the cooperation between the parts are the most important factors in achieving the purpose of the whole (the community).  It’s not about replacing the parts when a mistake occurs.  It’s about the parts understanding the purpose of the social system (to produce beautiful music), understanding their roles and responsibilities in that system, and how they can cooperate with each other.  These elements enable the system to produce the desired outcomes (e.g. beautiful music to be enjoyed or a successful operation).

In 2016 Wells Fargo fired 5,000 employees for creating millions of unauthorized bank and credit card accounts.  Customers complained, and leadership acted.  The employees were incentivized by the Wells Fargo leadership to sell a certain number of new accounts to banking customers within a certain timeframe.  More so, they were threatened by that leadership with disciplinary action if these stretch goals were not met.

To save their careers they created new accounts using customer data and without customer knowledge. Did the employees do this completely on their own or did the policies influence them?  What they did was wrong and there is no defending it.  Simply stated, in a social system, one part will influence the other and to remove root causes requires a new way of thinking about leadership and the impact it has on the parts and on the community. Wells Fargo leadership blamed the people, yet their incentive policy contributed to the inappropriate behaviors.

In our hospital example, there was probably a dozen or more hand-offs that occurred in that operating room between the surgery preparation time and the time the nurse returned from her break.  Each of those hand-offs was an opportunity for effective communication and cooperation.  Information about the location of the kidney was a hand-off.  What to do with the slush was a hand-off.  Each of those hand-offs was a process that could be improved.  To blame the nurse(s) does nothing to improve those hand-offs and therefore, nothing to prevent a reoccurrence.

If we fired every nurse and every bank employee in the country and replaced them all with highly trained substitutes would anything improve?  It’s unlikely because the system did not change.  Systems thinking provides every leader with the best opportunity to create an environment where trust can flourish.  The first section of our leadership structure is labeled THINK.  It means an optimum leader who wants to effectively manage the variation in trust must embrace systems thinking and the metaphor of the orchestra.  Do you want optimum trust?  Have you embraced “systems thinking”?

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Accounting Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Personal Development Taxes Technology

What Does It Mean to Be a Leader in the Age of AI? Part 1

With the advent of artificial intelligence (A.I.) and machine learning, it’s time to re-evaluate how we hire, train and lead our employees.

The ability to do a job faster or cheaper will no longer be what sets an organization apart from its competitors, but rather the ability of organizations and its human component to critically and strategically think for the organization and its customers.

With improved critical thinking, machine learning and A.I., an organization will be able to move faster and more effectively than its competitors making it both more interesting and challenging for its human workforce and valuable to its customers.

In an A.I. environment, co-workers will be expected by its customers and the organization to work in teams, improve communication with customers, come up with original thoughts and strategies, explain how A.I. came up to its conclusions and implement their strategies. Objectives of the organization and its customers probably will not change (e.g. enhanced customer and trusted relationships, bottom and top line growth). However, the way the organization uses its human components will change dramatically.

What does it mean to critically think? According to the Foundation for Critically Thinking.org you and your co-workers should be able to:

  • Raise vital questions and problems, formulating them clearly and precisely.
  • Gather and assess relevant information, using abstract ideas to interpret it effectively.
  • Come to well-reasoned conclusions and solutions, testing them against relevant criteria and standards.
  • Thinking open-mindedly within alternative systems of thought, recognizing and assessing, as needs to be, their assumptions, implications, and practical consequences.
  • Communicate effectively with others (in teams) in figuring out complex solutions.

How to go about implementing and dealing with co-workers who are unfamiliar or unable to cope with the new paradigm?

  • Link their compensation and future to these management objectives so they realize the importance of these new organizational directives.
  • Identify your stars who understand and employ “critical thinking” methods and encourage them to lead by giving them authority and autonomy to do so.
  • Recognize, embrace and communicate this as a cultural shift that will enhance the well- being and livelihood of everyone involved.
  • Be prepared to promote team members that exhibit these skills and counsel out those who can’t adopt.
  • Prioritize these skill sets as a core competency of new hires.
  • Make it as a top goal for your organization.
  • Hire the right professionals.
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Best Practices Management Marketing Personal Development

People Want Entrepreneurial Culture!

Suddenly, entrepreneurial culture is in demand by C-Suiters of large corporations. Why? They see small companies doing what they aren’t—moving fast and seizing opportunities. They see more and more start-ups taking industries by storm with innovative products, groundbreaking services, and fresh takes on consumer demand. And they want to do the same.

Large businesses are under pressure from stockholders and board members to make entrepreneurial culture happen, and they don’t understand why that culture is off-limits in their own companies. Slowly, they realize where they went wrong. They learn that their rigid structure, strict processes, and scale of standardization they’ve polished over the years have actually worked against them. Their own employees have become discouraged and disempowered.

An employee can’t be forced to feel inspired and invested, and C-Suiters can’t develop entrepreneurial culture overnight. This takes long-term commitment—it is not a fad or an item on a checklist. The basics of entrepreneurial culture contradict some sacred corporate cows, such as structure, compliance, and compensation. This shift will require you to introduce 3 new wild horses:

  1. Work like a two-division company. If your customer is at the top, how can customer service and sales be at the bottom? No matter how an entrepreneur’s company and office are organized, there is a permeating two-division attitude and structure. These are sales and sales support. Sales is on top, and everybody else works to support sales. This includes production, marketing, and administration. Even the CEO is in sales support. Why? Because every entrepreneur knows that employees are paid by the customer, through sales. To ensure that departments such as marketing and production do their best, keep them informed and in the loop. Sales and customer service know the most about the market, so why not use them to keep everyone relevant and updated?
  2. Pay for performance. This might be difficult for a large corporation to implement. Your employees will be doubtful of this shift unless they are already paid according to performance. But, in order to foster entrepreneurial culture, a portion of their pay must be measured by profitability, growth, and sales. You need to make sure that your employees are driven by much more than a stable paycheck. Paying your employees just for attendance tells them, “Whether or not the company makes a profit, you’ll get paid the same, so relax!” Dedicated members of an entrepreneurial workforce are eager to gamble their pay on personal productivity.
  3. Be mindful of the legal department. Corporations can suffer from the restraint of legal departments. Hidden in their good intentions to protect against liability is a tendency to halt creativity. In our opinion, legal should develop a system where strict compliance reviews simply are not necessary. Part of their pay should be based on growth, sales, and profitability, just like everyone else. Why should their pay stay the same no matter how competitive the company is? Their challenge should not be “Can we do this?” It should be “How can we do this?”

In our book, The Entrepreneurial Culture: 23 Ways to Engage and Empower Your People, you’ll find the tools we used to create entrepreneurial culture at Barefoot. These tools can be applied to corporations of any size. Released in 2014 alongside Jeff Hayzlett’s on-demand C-Suite TV, it is the ideal companion to our New York Times bestselling book, The Barefoot Spirit: How Hardship, Hustle, and Heart Built America’s #1 Wine Brand. Check ‘em out!

For more, read on: http://csnetworkadvis.staging.wpengine.com/advisor/michael-houlihan-and-bonnie-harvey/

 

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Best Practices Growth Management Personal Development

So, You Say Your Company Wants an Entrepreneurial Culture

Anyone who owns or manages a business or organization can say they want their employees to be invested in the company’s mission. They can say they want to hire natural entrepreneurs. Of course, it is doable to hire the crème de la crème. Aside from entrepreneurship college graduates, you will find and interview people whose core values exhibit those of self-sufficiency, resourcefulness, imagination, and responsibility, but your company environment is what will either keep or frustrate those bright-eyed new hires. It will be impossible for them to identify with the company’s goals without the proper environment.

It can be quite the paradox. Job security is a top-priority item for all employees, but for those who are met with office politics and petty status issues, job security can become the only reason to go to work. How can these people be imaginative and empowered at work when they have a career to worry about? Before Barefoot Wines was conceived, Michael was a government employee. He was motivated, like most college grads, to be productive and move forward in his field. But the negative office environment gave Michael a wake-up call. He did not want to become an employee who was detached from his actual job, only going to work because it was his duty to show up. From then on, he was determined to avoid working for any such organization.

In part, Barefoot Wine is due to what Michael learned from his stint with the government. As a company grows, it is further and further removed from accountability for the customer experience, and sales. Any employee may think, “Sales is someone else’s responsibility. I’m going to get paid regardless.” This leads to people becoming comfortable in their specialty. Why does their individual job matter in terms of customers and sales? This thought process is even worse at the governmental level, where many are so detached from customer responsibility.

Simply put, sales is the foundation from which entrepreneurial culture grows. If two people start a business together, they both know that sales need to happen to guarantee them a job the following day. As the business grows, new departments develop, and the two owners are not as close to sales as they once were. Here, you can see how easy it is to lose an entrepreneurial culture. Maintaining an entrepreneurial culture is more important than building it! As a company grows, compliance and fear can replace productivity and sales. Employees are no longer dedicated to responsibility, ownership, and empowerment—their basic checklist is simplified to attendance and status.

So, before you interview and hire for people who are natural entrepreneurs, you must first make sure your company environment will keep them there. Whether it is a startup or an established company, it is essential for any organization to create a culture of acknowledgement, respect, ownership, and enthusiasm. Always keep the customer experience first in mind. This, instead of organizational politics, must be most important.

Get in tune with the company’s foundation and what got it all started—sales. Sales must be the motivational factor that drives and fosters a proper entrepreneurial culture. How can you maintain a proper environment if you’re out of touch with your core goals? When your employees understand that they are appreciated and are capable of making a difference, they will be devoted to delivering the best customer experience!

For more, read on: http://csnetworkadvis.staging.wpengine.com/advisor/michael-houlihan-and-bonnie-harvey/

 

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Growth Human Resources Management Personal Development

Overcoming the Leadership Gap

Leadership or rather a deficit of available, competent leadership has risen to become one of the most pressing talent challenges faced by global organizations. Deloitte University Press stated, “nearly 9 out of 10 global HR and business leaders (86 percent) cited leadership as a top issue.” This, coupled with the widening gap between organizational leadership needs and leaders available to meet those needs indicates what many of us already know, most companies have been unable to successfully develop their current leaders as well as build an effective leadership pipeline for the future.

Many organizations propose leadership training as the recommended solution for this problem (and trust me, I am all for leadership training), but I believe that ignores the core leadership deficiency in most organizations. Before training, must come selection and most organizations do a poor job of selecting leaders.

Most supervisors and managers are promoted first and foremost because of their technical skills and often that is the source of the problem. Starting with first time supervisors, many are promoted for the wrong reasons and this is the source of the problem. Many supervisors become supervisors because they were good at their previous position. If they worked as customer service representatives, they stood out as customer service representatives. If they worked as engineers, they were stood out as engineers. If they were sales people, their sales were above average.

But there is an inherent problem with this: The skills necessary to succeed in a leadership, supervisory, or managerial role are completely different than those necessary to succeed in a non-managerial role. Yet, as people’s roles travel from contributing to leadership, the skills necessary succeed go from technical and specific, to tactical and social. Where as a contributor, the ability to handle specific task, may have been critical, as a leader the ability to motivate and instill vision within people is an absolute must.

Although the ability to perform is an absolute must when looking for candidates who can take on greater leadership responsibility, data shows that high performance does not equal high leadership potential. CEB, a member-based executive team advisory company, says that just one in six high-performance employees also exhibit the attributes that indicate leadership potential. Research from the Corporate Leadership Council of the Corporate Executive Board indicates that only 15% of high performers show high leadership potential. There are many other surveys that have produced similar results. The bottom line is clear, being a top performer is not an accurate indicator of leadership potential.

Many organizations never consider this when promoting people into leadership positions. Instead it is assumed that because they excelled beyond their peers, they should be promoted above their peers, yet in reality many of these new leaders do not posses the skills needed to succeed in management. For these individual, the words of Marshall Goldsmith ring true, “What got you here won’t get you there.”

Unfortunately, most organizations have no alternative method of rewarding their top performers. There are many who are subject matter experts in their field, who in the best interest of everyone involved should remain as such. But too often, the only way to work your way up the ladder and increase your compensation is to take on a supervisory role.

Let’s use baseball as analogy to show how unreasonable this really is. Let’s say that a baseball team has an all-star catcher. This catcher is the best player on the team. No manager in his (or her) right mind would entertain the idea of moving that catcher to the first base in the name of upward mobility (on average 1st basemen make approximate 74% more than catchers). That would be a horrible idea, but unfortunately, in the workplace it happens everyday. Lineman are moved to receivers, catchers are moved to first base, centers are moved to point guard, and left wings are moved to goalie, and the team suffers.

Not only is this not in the best interest of the organization (we need more people who really know their areas of expertise inside and out and who love learning more about them), its’ not in the best interest of the people they will attempt to lead. And many of these individuals end up resenting their new roles and miss being “in the trenches” of whatever they were doing before. But what are they going to do, turn down the opportunity to be more highly compensated for what they bring to the table? Stall their career path because there is no alternative?

Organizations must decide to choose potential over performance as a basis for leadership selection. In addition to this, an alternative career path needs to be developed that rewards high performers who are not capable of effectively taking on leadership roles. Until this occurs, we will continue to see a shortage of effective leaders.

 

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Growth Management Personal Development Women In Business

Intentions: Your Key to Empower Mindful Leadership

Mindfulness grows as you practice in little bits each day. Just like a bodybuilder doesn’t become lean and muscular in one session, a mindful leader must continue to work on the seven practices we’re introducing in this series. This week, keep practicing your centering breath and beliefs work, we will add a new mindful practice: intention.

Intention is becoming clear about what you energetically want to have happen. I like to think of it as where your head goals meet your heart of action. For example, I intend for this experience to be educational and fun—intention adds a feeling to your goal. We live in a feeling universe, but all too often our human experience does not embrace those feelings. Mindful leaders choosing to live mindful lives make time to set powerful intentions, feelings for the life they want to live. They do this one day, one experience at a time. It’s even more critical we do this as we face the business, often mindlessness of the holiday season.

Mini-Practice As you look forward to the upcoming holiday season, pick one event and ask yourself, what is the intention for this? How do you want to show up energetically to that event? Office parties be a good one to try intention setting. Maybe the family holiday meal? What do you want to have happen or to feel as a result of the experience? What do you intend for this holiday season? The words above can help you get started.

The practice of setting intentions will help you align your goals with your feelings and to those of the universe around you. And you may be surprised how often you get what you intend.

AFFIRMATION:  I intend to experience ease in all I do this holiday season. I release stress and receive mindfulness.  

 

Mindfulness matters, HD

Holly Duckworth, CAE, CMP, LSP, is a nationally recognized speaker, author, and coach for mindful leadership. I work with stressed-out leaders to create profits, peace, and presence.

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Management Marketing Operations Personal Development

Eliminate Customer Complaints… Switch Things Up!

“Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results,” is a very famous quote by Albert Einstein. If you’re doing something and getting a negative result, it’s probably time to switch things up.

In other words, “Stop it!”

This quote reminds me of a video I saw once on YouTube, called “Stop It!” It features comedian Bob Newhart as a therapist. In the video, a patient comes to see him and explains a recurring fear, of being buried alive in a box, that she thinks about all the time. Remember, this video is meant to be funny. The simple solution he gives her is, “Stop it!”

We can say the same thing about customer service. There’s an exercise I sometimes do when I’m presenting on service where I ask audience members to tell me some of the common complaints they hear from customers. I then ask these same people how regularly they hear these complaints. I am amazed (not in a good way) when they answer saying that they hear some of these complaints daily. Some even say that they hear them several times a day! This is when it’s time for me to share the secret solution. I become serious, look at the audience, and say, “Are you ready to hear the solution?” I pause for dramatic effect, and then I say, “Stop it!”

The seriousness ends when everyone starts laughing. They laugh because they know it’s never that simple. If it were, they would have solved the problem long ago. Even though this is a joke, it is a set-up for a very serious conversation on how to eliminate, or at least minimize, the problems that are causing these complaints.

Is it a common occurrence for us to bother our customers with policies, rules, or processes? Just remember that there’s a good chance that there are more people with the same complaints than just the ones you are hearing from. These people simply aren’t letting you know about it.

When it comes to hearing complaints from your customers, the statistic most commonly shared is this: in an average business, for every complaint you receive, there are 26 others who have the same complaint, but choose not to tell you. Even if that stat is only half true, that’s still a lot of unhappy customers. And these are unhappy customers that you don’t even know about. You think they are happy because they don’t complain to you, but that is the furthest thing from the truth. They may choose to never do business with you again. Can you afford to take that chance?

Sit down with your team. Talk about the common complaints you get. Then, get to the root of it. What is driving that complaint? There is always a way to make it better. Bad things that are happening over and over again simply shouldn’t be happening over and over again. So… Stop it!

 

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Best Practices Growth Management Skills Technology

The Importance of a High Performance Cybersecurity Team

In this six-part series I am going to address five pillars for creating a high performance security team. we are starting at a high level in this article and then each week I will go into more detail on another pillar.

Because cybersecurity professionals face a lot of adversity and burnout it is incredibly important for their leadership to understand what it takes to create a high performance security team.

If you are the type of leader who is striving to make big things happen for your organization, protect your organization’s data, and possibly create a competitive advantage through security, a high performance security team is the answer. If you are reading this and you don’t have a security team at all, then forming one or bringing in security consultants is the place to start. As you build that team you can incorporate the lessons from this series in order to build a high performance team from the ground up.

High performance teams in general get more done with less effort and with better results. They have less drama and more creative ideas. A High performance security team is one of the cornerstones of your competitive advantage because when you have rock star security talent that isn’t going to leave, you have something your competition probably does not, which puts you in a leading position.

You are probably intimately familiar with teams that are not high performing from your own experiences throughout your career and so am I, that is why I wrote The Corporate Detox. Therefore let’s dive right into the signs of a high performance team because so you can start focusing on what you want vs. focusing on what you don’t want.

The signs you have a high performance team:

  • Team members genuinely like spending time together and trust each other
  • Everyone is working towards a shared goal and vision
  • Projects are completed on time and on (or under) budget
  • Assigned roles are based on individuals strengths and interests
  • Team members communicate with each other and with you (their leader)
  • Everyone talks about what is working and what isn’t working
  • During brainstorming sessions no idea is ridiculed
  • Everyone is encouraged to participate in discussions
  • Feedback is provided in real time and in a constructive way
  • There is no finger pointing or blame when things don’t go as planned
  • Roles and accountability are openly discussed
  • No one is “just hanging in there” and counting down the days until Friday

If your security team is missing some of these signs, it’s okay, you can turn it around, and I’m going to provide you a roadmap to do this. In this series, each article will discuss one of the five pillars of not just high-performance teams, but EPICC high performance teams:

EPICC Teams are Engaged, Productive, Have Integrity, Collaborate and Communicate.

Now between reading this and next week’s article, I encourage you to conduct a review of your current security team. How many of the signs that I described in the above checklist can you say your team embodies? How many need a little work? How many are non-existent? Don’t pad your answers; be honest because this will help you focus on what you want. When you see areas that you are not happy with you will better know what changes you need to make.

Sometimes it’s easier to identify what you don’t want in order to more clearly identify and define what you do want. In looking ahead to next week’s article in which we will discuss the first pillar, Engagement, start to think about the times you have been most engaged and the times you have been least engaged at work.

In the meantime you can always reach out to me at sharon@c-suiteresults.com to discuss this topic, security teams, or security strategy. If you enjoy podcasts you can listen to C-Suite Results Radio to tap into the wisdom of other successful business people who know the path you’re traveling.

 

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Personal Development Women In Business

Expert Advice on How to Negotiate With a Bully

 

“To be fearless against a bully display what he fears.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

“Expert Advice On How To Negotiate With A Bully”

Follow this expert advice to negotiate with a bully.

  1. Differentiate between a bully that may be controlling versus bullying. Some people don’t see themselves as bullies. They may be the type that likes to be in control of situations and display overly aggressive means to maintain that control. The two perspectives possess different mindsets.
  2. Identify the personality type of the bully you’re negotiating with (you’re always negotiating). Thus, even in your first encounter with a person (and after that time), you should assess that person’s traits, demeanor, and characteristics. Doing so will give you the insight needed to formulate a negotiation strategy.
  3. Determine the best environment to negotiate with a bully. He may be stronger in one environment as the result of resources surrounding him or those he has to ‘save face’ for; this may also tend to make him cockier than he’d normally be. If that’s the case, get him out of his environment; this should be done physically and/or psychologically. In doing so you’ll dilute his psychological powers and weaken him mentally in the process (i.e. power is perceptional).
  4. If addressing a bully on a one-on-one basis doesn’t achieve your objective(s), marshal forces to use as leverage against him. Depending on the situation, let those that he has more respect for take the lead on your behalf; never let a bully know how strong your forces are. You must be prepared to send in a second, third, fourth, etc., wave that’s stronger than what preceded it. For maximum effect, the timing of your next foray should occur just when the bully thinks he’s squashed your best efforts. In normal situations, over time you’ll wear the bully down and he’ll acquiesce to your wishes. Be mindful of the bully that won’t acquiesce over a period of exhaustive negotiations when forces have been marshaled against him. You might be dealing with a bully that’s willing to destroy himself for the sake of denying you any kind of victory. To prevent from making too many concessions, establish exit points that indicate when you should depart the negotiation. Always be mindful that, the longer you stay engaged in a negotiation, the likelier you are to make concessions to your disadvantage. This is due to the psychological need to see the negotiation to its end. This could be to your severe detriment.
  5. Once you’ve achieved your objective(s), over a period of time reengage the bully from a polite perspective and observe how he interacts with you. To the degree the relationship is important to you, be prepared to let him win an encounter, but never let him bully you again. Your prior actions should be engrained in his mind to the point that he’d not want to experience the prior encounter that you two engaged in.
  6. As further insight into the affects your engagement has had with a bully, note how those closes to the bully engage with you after an encounter. Their actions will allow you to assess the degree of sting that still resides in the bully.

Bullies only pick on those that they perceive to be weaker than themselves. Don’t let a bully perceive weakness in you and he’ll have no target to attack … and everything will be right with the world.

What are your takeaways? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

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