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Tag: The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

There’s Hidden Value in the ‘Nice Factor’ When Negotiating

“The hidden value of the nice factor is exposed by reciprocation.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“I don’t know why I made those concessions. The other negotiator was so nice! Something made me want to be nice in return.” Unbeknownst to the speaker of those words, subliminally, he was affected by the nice factor.

Have you ever considered the hidden value of the nice factor when negotiating? Being nice is perceptional, depending on who you’re negotiating with. Nevertheless, it has a place at some point in every negotiation.

The following are ways you can deploy the settle ally of the nice factor to enrich your negotiation outcomes.

Positioning:

Negotiators set the tone for the negotiation at its outset. Note: The outset starts before you’re at the negotiation table. They may set a tone to suggest you should not take them lightly or one that implies they’ll go along to get along.

Some negotiators project a stern persona to convey the sentiment that they’re not to be dallied with; this persona can also be invoked to protect the veneer of insecurity. That’s worth mentioning because you should be watchful and asses if such a demeanor serves that purpose. That can uncover the personality type that you’re really dealing with.

In some cases, a stern type of projected positioning is advantageous. But, if you don’t consider the negotiation style of your negotiation counterpart, it can be the uncoupling of the negotiation before it starts. Thus, you should be mindful of the persona you project at the beginning stages and throughout a negotiation. You don’t want to turn the other negotiator into a more abstinent opponent if he’s not already one. If such occurs, attempt to mollify him by modifying your demeanor. Be nicer.

Soft Negotiators:

Soft negotiators will display their demeanor by presenting a broad smile upon meeting you and a handshake that is appropriate for the encounter (i.e. not too hard, not too soft). As you engage in the negotiation, assess to what degree this may be a façade. You can accomplish that by noting the slight changes in her personality when discussing points of disagreements. If she’s quick to placate you, make sure you let her win points, too. Doing that will enhance the nice factor.

Hard Negotiators:

Hard negotiators may present more of a challenge when attempting to invoke the nice factor. Depending on the degree of their hardness, moderate to obnoxious, the nice factor may not be appropriate. Instead, you may want to adopt a persona that matches the style of the other negotiator to get him to modify his demeanor. If he does, at that point you may consider implementing the nice factor. Depending on the severity of his modification, being nice can serve as his reward.

Negotiation Reset:

Most negotiators don’t like strong tensions in a negotiation. When tensions reach a certain level, negotiators tend to be more dogmatic about the positions they’ve adopted. So, if you find yourself in such a contention, consider employing the nice factor. This may be in the form of making a concession. If you’re not sure if doing that will ease tensions, preface your offer with an ‘if’ statement (e.g. If I do this, will you do ‘x’?). The point of using the nice factor at this point will be an attempt to reset the negotiation to a less pretentious position.

The more positive the experiential endowment you invoke within the other negotiator, the easier the flow of the negotiation will be. That will lend itself to an enhanced negotiation engagement, which in turn should lead to a greater negotiation outcome for you … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Value #factor #Fight #Negativity #cyber, cyberbullying #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #Negotiator #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Entrepreneurship Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

What’s the Difference Between a Lie and the Truth?

“A lie is only believable if you accept it.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Person 1: “I could tell he was lying.” Person 2: ‘How?” Person 1: “Because his words were unbelievable!” Person 2: “I missed that.”

Do you know the difference between a lie and the truth? It’s the degree to which you believe either. Let me explain.

As you’re hearing something, you assess to what degree it may be true; in part, that’s based on what you’ve known to be true from your past experiences. You continue to assess the believability of something the more you hear of it. You wonder to what degree the truth is stretched, at the point when words become suspect. As you continue to listen, once they’re stretched past your point of believability, you then consider the words to be lies.

Intellectually you may be aware of the process stated above. But, do you raise your sense of awareness to recognize the thought process you’re engaged in when it’s occurring? It’s important that you do so. In doing so, you raise your sense of consciousness to what’s said, which means you may become alert to prior passages that you overlooked. That also means, you may have allowed lies to go unchallenged, which emboldens its purveyor to continue lying.

There’s a thin line between a lie and the truth. Sometimes, it’s thinner based on who’s telling the story and who the listener is. To protect yourself in interactions with others, note what’s said, when it’s said, and the environment in which it’s said. In doing so, you’ll gain greater insight into the motivation behind when and why words part from the truth. That will also be the point when your sense of keenness insulates you from the mental depravity that occurs when one is falsely led by lies. You’ll truly be protecting yourself from mental anguish … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations? 

Most negotiators will misrepresent the truth during negotiations. It’s a fact and if you don’t think it occurs you’re being pollyannaish. Recognize that for what it’s worth.

Consider this, if a negotiator completely disclosed his circumstances, he’d expose his vulnerability and weaken his position. Thus, to prevent that from occurring, he’ll withhold aspects of his position to enhance his outcome. He’ll stretch the truth to accomplish that means. By noting his stretch point, you gain insight into his source of motivation. That will lend insight into the importance of the point. You can hone that insight to create discomfort for him. Do so and observe how quickly he wants to move from away from that discomfort. As an aside, the more he wants to move from that point, the more angst he’ll be displaying about his uncomfortableness.

It’s said that all lies are born from truth. That means a lie is only a lie to the degree that the people involved believe it to be. In your negotiations, understand the purpose that a lie serves and you’ll have greater insight as to where the truth lies.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Emotion #Lies #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #EmotionalControl #relationships #liars #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How to Prevent from Being Slaughtered When You Negotiate

“You set yourself up to be slaughtered in a negotiation if you don’t set yourself up right.” –Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“What the heck happened in there? They slaughtered us! They out-negotiated us at every turn! Why did we not see that coming?” “I guess we didn’t plan for that type of negotiation with that type of negotiator”, was the reply.

People engage in negotiations because they seek to maximize an outcome. In that quest, some people lose their focus. They use the same negotiation strategies they’ve used in the past and wonder why they get slaughtered when those strategies are no longer effective. To prevent that from happening to you, note the following.

Positioning

Environment: Know what the best environment is to conduct your negotiation in. That environment may encompass doing so in writing, or phone, versus in person. There are different dynamics that come into play when negotiating in different environments. Know the environment that will most benefit your style of negotiating compared to the negotiation style of the opposing negotiator.

Perception: Everyone has an image of who the person is that they’re negotiating with. That persona is based in part on what the perceiver knows about the other negotiator; that stems from what the perceiver has seen, heard, and thought of that person in the past.

Project the persona warranted for the negotiation. Take into consideration the negotiation style of the opposing negotiator in your calculation (i.e. hard (I’ll crush you), soft (I’ll go along to get along)). The perception you cast and how you perceive the other negotiator will determine the flow of the negotiation. To prevent being caught off guard, about your perception of the other negotiator and him of you, be adaptable as to the persona you project.

Strategy

Entity: Know who you’re really dealing with (i.e. what force and sources motivates the other negotiator). Consider how he interprets information and how best to message that information related to the messenger (i.e. your persona). Your message may be received more favorably with one persona based on how that persona is perceived.

Leverage: When assembling strategies, assess how you’ll employ the powers of leverage. Leverage is a tool that can embolden you with positional power (i.e. power you have for a specified time), which can improve your negotiation position. Be cautious of how you use leverage. If you state you’ll engage in an action and don’t follow through, not only will you lose the ability to invoke leverage further in the negotiation, you also run the risk of losing credibility.

End Game

What’s your end game and how will you know when you’ve entered it? You should develop the answers to those questions during the planning phase of your negotiation. The plan should encompass what might trigger the end game phase of the negotiation, how you might promote it to occur if it’s lagging, and what you might do to terminate the negotiation if you discern that your efforts will not get you there.

By having markers denoting possible exit points from a negotiation, you lessen the possibility of staying engaged longer than what’s necessary; staying engaged longer increases your vulnerability by making unnecessary concessions.

Once you arm yourself with the thoughts mentioned above, you’ll insulate yourself from the brutality that could otherwise occur. That insulation will also be a shield that prevents you from being slaughtered in your negotiations … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#slaughter #Fight #Negativity #cyber, cyberbullying #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #Negotiator #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

 

 

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Health and Wellness Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

What Emotional Currency Do You Accept?

“Emotional currency is the exchange we engage in when seeking self-satisfaction.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“I was just promoted and received the title of ‘Junior Assistant’ in the PR department. I don’t care if others in the department with my skill set are making $13k more than me. I’m a ‘Junior Assistant’!”

Those were the words of a very jubilant individual that was more satisfied with a title than money. His fulfillment came from the emotional currency he’d received that made him feel complete.

What emotional currency do you accept when seeking to placate your needs and wants? The more you’re aware of how and when emotional currency moves you, the greater the chance you’ll have to control the degree of your acceptance of it.

Emotional currency can come in many forms. It can be in the form of a raise; you have more money and thus, you feel better about yourself due to your new financial status. It can stem from acceptance of you by a group or others; you feel wanted. It’s also born from the elevation of your mental wellbeing as the result of how you see yourself. It can also be a manipulator used against you.

So, why should you be aware of the emotional currency you accept and when you accept it? The answer lies in what you’ll do to obtain it based on the circumstances you’re in. A moment ago, I stated that emotional currency can be a tool of manipulation. That means, when you’re emotionally depressed, you’re more likely to leap at the opportunity to enhance your emotional state of mind; a high state of emotional satisfaction is something that everyone seeks. All of us should know our limits so that we don’t merge into a limitless desire to obtain what we need. Plus, the more attuned you are to your emotional needs, the better you’ll be at making decisions that are beneficial to your long-term wellbeing.

You’ve more than likely heard the statement, ‘get a grip’. That means you should control your desires. Once you raise your awareness about the emotional currency you deal in, and the sources from which it’s refilled, you’ll be more mindful of determining the sources you’ll allow to replenish your needs … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations? 

In a negotiation, value is perceptional. That perception is based on where you are in the moment of the negotiation. If someone attempts to assuage your feelings by telling you how great a negotiator you are, depending on your emotional state of mind, that compliment may be all it takes to take you for all you have.

Be keenly alert when someone begins to heap praise upon you during a negotiation, especially if it seems to appear out of nowhere. More than likely it’s a ploy to enhance your emotional currency. The real thought may belie the exact opposite of the compliment that’s used to mollify you. To keep from being ‘played like a chump’, accept compliments given to you, but don’t let them deter you from your goals of achieving what you want. Be steadfast in your quest and see what becomes of the compliments. Therein will lie the uncovering of their real intent.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Emotion #Currency #Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #liars #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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Best Practices Culture Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How To Fight The Negativity Of Cyberbullying

“Cyberbully – A person that seeks power by hiding behind the cloak of anonymity due to his cowardness to confront others head-on. Or, someone too weak in personality that it causes him to seek pleasure by denigrating others.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“He constantly picked on me by posting untruthful things that he said I engaged in. Then, he made unflattering comments about my mother. I found that of particular distaste.”

You may have thought the words above stemmed from two friends in their teens. The statement did come from two friends, but they were CEOs of major corporations. They were discussing the cyberbullying effects targeted against one of the CEOs in cyberspace.

Anyone can come under attack in cyberspace. The reasons for such don’t have to be valid. Do you know how to fight the negativity of cyberbullying? Continue reading this article to gather a few tips that you can use to combat a cyberbully.

Prevention:

Keep your guard up.

Be on the alert for those that might attack you. Some will do so because of the assets they perceive you to have. They may also do so because of the industry your business is in, your ethnicity and/or gender. Some people may just be mentally challenged, which causes them to seek out a target to bully.

None of this is to say that you should become paranoid. It simply means that you should be alert about how and why someone might attack you in cyberspace.

Turn yourself into a small target.

Know that some people engage in cyberbullying for pleasure. Others may do so as the prelude to extortion; extortion can be in the form of gaining leverage to achieve a goal, especially when negotiating.

To thwart a bully’s efforts, turn yourself into a small target. Don’t flaunt your assets in the manner that would attract and invite a possible attack. If you become a victim, keep a prepared set of documents that show you may not have what the bully wants. To do this, you must know what his ultimate goal is. You don’t want him to turn your perceived lack of assets against you and use that to enhance his position. Remember, it’s harder to hit a small target, but you must know what to morph that target into before it can be effective.

Fighting back:

Why me?

Bullies tend to target those persons or entities that they sense as being vulnerable. So, project strength when responding to the bully. You can do this by having others come to your defense and responding on your behalf. You can also respond by hitting the bully where he’s most vulnerable; it’s obvious that you’ll have to know his vulnerabilities to do this, which may require research.

I used the above strategy in an online forum in which someone attempted to bully others in the group. I asked the group if anyone knew that the bully had done the same thing in other groups. Someone said they did and that individual took the bully head-on. The bully retreated and was never heard from again. As an aside, I and the cohort that I used to fight the bully had already discussed this tactic before my ally engaged him. The bully had perpetrated the same tactics in a different forum that my ally and I were in.

Depending on the severity of the cyberbullying, you can get law officials involved, private detectives, etc. Regardless of the countermeasures you engage in, use them strongly enough to arrest the bully’s activities. Crush his will to engage you further so he dares not return to his former activities against you … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Fight #Negativity #cyber, cyberbullying #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Anchoring #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #Negotiator #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Marketing Negotiations News and Politics Sales Skills Women In Business

Lie To Me, Please

“Alternative facts are aversions to the truth, to the degree that the truth remains concealed.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“Okay. If you say that wasn’t you, I’ll believe you. Just know, the person I saw from 15 feet away looked just like you. Even more, when I called your name, the person that wasn’t you turned around, saw me, and hurriedly left the area. As that person scurried away, they walked like you, too.”

Do you know why some people will allow others to lie to them, accept the lie, and be okay doing so? The answer lies in one’s current circumstances and the environment they’re in.

1. Some people will subjugate themselves because of their circumstances (e.g. the liar is the one that pays the bills, earns the money in the relationship, is dominant in the relationship, etc.)

2. They do so for the better good of others that are involved.

3. In other cases, the target of the lie wants to be perceived as fitting into the norms of the group they belong to; to do otherwise might mean expulsion from the group.

4. In yet other situations, it’s easier for some people to accept an altered reality because the truth would hurt too badly (e.g. I can’t believe they’d do that to me. It must not be true.)

5. Some people may go along for a while to see what a liar will do next.

Here’s the point. We’re all driven by our emotions. Thus, our emotions will lend insight into what we’re willing to believe and accept. It’s not until that belief is too heavy a burden to bear that we change our beliefs about others and ourselves. That’s when we’ll take our life in a new direction.

Always be aware of why someone possesses certain beliefs. Having that insight will allow you to understand the person’s source of motivation and thinking. That will also allow you to better assist that individual in determining what reality really is. You’ll be able to use that to benefit yourself and them … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

In a negotiation, there will be times when you sense that the other negotiator is lying. You may gather such sensations from the manner that the opposing negotiator conveys certain sentiments via their body language (e.g. leaning away when defining a statement as the truth, altering the pitch of their voice while constantly looking away from you when doing so, fidgeting with other items in their proximity).

In such situations, it may behoove you to allow the liar to continue his lies to understand the characteristics of the person you’re dealing with. You may also do so if he’s telling little white lies so as not to embarrass him. Then, when that position no longer serves you, consider confronting him to validate his perception of the truth versus what he professes it to be.

Always remember, people will only do to you what you allow them to do. That means you have a degree of control in every environment you’re in. When it comes to dealing with those that lie incessantly, recognize them for who and what they are and deal with them appropriately.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #liars #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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How to Use Anchoring Better in Your Negotiations

“Anchoring is a way to keep a negotiation within boundaries, but it can also be a way to weigh it down.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“We can pay your bill if you’re reasonable about the settlement. That means, we’re willing to start the discussion at $300,000, not the $650,000 that you indicated. Anything else is a none starter. Do you wish to start the discussion?” Those were the words of one negotiator to another. He was using a technique known as anchoring to advantage his position. How would you respond?

The following information will give you insights as to how you can use and defend the technique of anchoring in your negotiations.

What is anchoring?

Anchoring is a strategy that you can use to set boundaries in a negotiation. If you and the other negotiator agree to those boundaries, you have the confinements in which the negotiation will occur.

Be mindful, depending upon the depth of the negotiation, those outposts can be violated and lead the negotiation to unsavory places. Thus, be cognizant of the signals that indicate that the other negotiator might be in the process of abating those boundaries. At the first sign of such actions, note the cause that promoted the change in behavior. That will give you the clue about what to address if you wish to bring the negotiation back in bounds.

Why use anchoring?

As stated, anchoring is a way to set parameters around the negotiation. Therefore, if abided by, the agreement should allow for an easier flowing negotiation.

Boundaries in a negotiation can be a curse or a blessing. That’s the inherent dilemma in using this strategy. If you’re negotiating with a weaker negotiator, you can skillfully use anchoring to limit his abilities, while leaving your options open to explore the upper realms of possibilities. If you’re the weaker negotiator (i.e. fewer resources, little leverage, etc.), you risk being susceptible to an unfavorable negotiation outcome.

Factors to consider when using anchoring tactics.

  1. Negotiation (resources, personalities)

As mentioned above, you should consider the resources that you and the other negotiator have at your availability. The more resources that a negotiator has, the more leverage he can bring to bear on the negotiation. That doesn’t mean if you have fewer resources that you’ll automatically fall into the weaker category. It means, if you’re the weaker negotiator, you should attempt to limit the leverage of the other negotiator so he’ll not be able to employ those resources against you.

In addition, consider the other negotiator’s personality. Some negotiators don’t like to take advantage of others. And other negotiators will stomp on you while you’re down to keep you from getting up. The better you know the personality type that you’re negotiating with, the better you’ll be able to predict what he might do.

  1. Leverage points to consider (i.e. urgency, unseen negotiators, etc.)

If you have a grasp into the urgency, deadlines, and timeframes that the other negotiator needs to conclude the negotiation, you’ll have insights into how you can use anchoring to lead him down the negotiation path. For example, if you know that he must conclude your negotiation before another phase starts with those that are not part of your negotiation, you can anchor his deadline to a timeframe. Then, if he doesn’t make concessions that you request, you can slow the negotiation down.

Anchoring can be an extremely powerful strategy to use in your negotiation. Most negotiations contain some form of anchoring embedded in them with them identified as such. If you’re more aware of anchoring in your negotiations, you’ll be less likely to get sunk by them … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Anchoring #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #Negotiations #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #Negotiator #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Are You There Yet?

“Perception is driven by attitude and attitude is driven by desire. To be more successful in life, you must allow your attitude and desire to be driven by actions.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“Don’t blame me for your mediocrity when you’re not willing to take the actions required for greater success.” That was the retort exchanged between two individuals that shared a relationship.

To advance in life, one must be willing to take the actions required to move from one position to another. It’s okay to dream, but until you put your dreams into actions, they’re nothing more than images in your mind; they’ll never become your reality. Worse, if not acted on, they could turn into nightmares.

When seeking greater achievements, you must be mentally prepared to enact the actions necessary for those achievements. One achievement becomes a steppingstone to higher achievements. Thus, you should never view yourself as reaching a final-destination, because if you have life, you should seek to achieve more in life. By doing so, you leave a doorway through which knowledge and future opportunities may enter.

Understand that a hopeless mind doesn’t serve you. It’ll leave you in a state of hopeless situations. You’ll be drained by your mental energy leakage, which otherwise could serve as fuel to lift you higher.

You create your own success in life. Where you are today is not where you were yesterday. Where you’ll be tomorrow is the design that you engage in today. That means you’re the person in control of your life. So, if you don’t like yourself or where you are, change it! You have the power, you have the control. Exercise that power and control to take yourself to a better place.

Here’s the point, even if you’re in a very happy and successful place in life, life will change. That means, what exists today will not exist tomorrow. Thus, you must constantly change with life. Once you do, you’ll become part of the evolution of life … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations? 

The outcome of many negotiations is somewhat of a foregone conclusion before they start. That’s due to the mindset the negotiators possess as they prepare and enter the negotiations.

If you constantly seek to advance a negotiation, based on the determination you display to achieve your quest (this would occur in the planning and implementation stages of the negotiation), you’ll be empowered with more confidence. The other negotiator will perceive your confidence and address you in a more serious manner.

Never shortchange yourself in a negotiation by thinking that the other party has more resources from which to out-negotiate you. That may be true but remember, David slayed Goliath. He did so by adopting a strategy that gave him an advantage; that began with David’s mental attitude and adopting a strategy to achieve his goals. It’s the strategies that you employ in a negotiation that will give you an advantage too. The first strategy starts with the way you think. Don’t limit yourself by possessing limiting thoughts.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Business #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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When Should You Act More Like A Stubborn Child

“Childlike behavior can be advantageous to adults when adults use them in an adult-like manner.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“He was told that he should not act like a stubborn child. Then he became more obstinate.” Those were the words exchanged by associates as they discussed the behavior of a friend of theirs.

When they were children, most adults possessed a limitless amount of imagination and a boundless degree of determination. As they became older, more mature, their childlike actions were abandoned so that they could be perceived as fitting into their environments. Unknowingly, conformity to those environment norms may have cost them opportunities.

Do you recall your childhood? When you sought a specific outcome, how determined were you to achieve it? How many ‘adult rules’ did you break in your efforts to uncover the solution to your quest? Then, you got older and supposedly wiser, which meant, you left those childish ways behind. Truth be known, those childish ways served you well then and they can serve you well, now.

When you find yourself in situations that you really want to get to the bottom of why certain actions occurred, or if you want to enhance the probability of a particular outcome, be persistent in uncovering a solution.

The point is, you will only receive in life what your actions indicate you’re willing to put forth to achieve. If something is denied you and you don’t put up a fight to get it, you send the signal to the holder of that source that what you sought wasn’t really that important to you. Either way, you’ve set the stage for future interactions and degree that you’ll fight for what you want. Thus, if you give up easily when requesting something, the person to whom you make that request knows that he only has to say no a few times and you’ll slither back into your den of mediocrity. Your hopes for future opportunities will lackluster and you’ll have no one to blame except yourself.

When it comes to achieving more in life, when appropriate, consider acting like you did when you were a child. Ask why, how come, who else, type of questions. You’ll be rewarded with greater outcomes in life … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations? 

Some negotiators use stonewalling tactics to keep you from reaching your goals. They may do so to enhance their negotiation position. If you use probing questions (e.g. why can’t that be done, who else might be able to approve this, what do you suggest we do to avoid this impasse), you’ll receive greater outcomes from your negotiation efforts. That’s true because you’ll acquire more insight into what’s really behind the other negotiator’s efforts to disallow your request. Once you know that, you’ll be better positioned to hone in on the discovery of what he’d rather keep hidden. Your probing with questions, like you did when you were a child, will reveal those hidden opportunities and bring them to light.

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In Negotiations Be On the Alert For Setup Questions

“Setup questions can be to a person what a snake charmer is to a snake, mesmerizing. Watch the person that uses setup questions to mesmerize you!” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“I can’t believe he asked me when I stopped beating my wife. I’ve never beaten my wife; I love her too much to do that! Those were the dejected words spoken by a man that was in the throes of a messy divorce proceeding to the question posed by the lawyer of his soon to be ex-wife.

Are you aware of how and why setup questions are designed to motivate you to a particular thought or action? In negotiations, you should be on the alert for setup questions.

A setup question (e.g. Most people would be horrified if that happened to them, right?) is used to position someone’s response as measured against what is viewed as being normal by others; it can also be used to alter the thought process of an individual.

The challenge to the responder is, if he answers contrary to the norm, he appears to be outside of that norm. That makes him appear to be abnormal. That’s a position that most people attempt to avoid, especially when such is exposed to others. The perception of abnormality can position someone as, he’s not like the rest of us, which can place that person in a squeamish position. It’s another way to apply a sense of unseen but felt leverage upon him.

When this tactic is used to alter someone’s thought process, it can be even more devastating, due to the attack on that person’s mental psyche. Thus, it can also be used to take someone off the offense and put them on the defense.

This tactic becomes more burdensome to the recipient of this ploy when used by someone that’s an aggressive or bully type of negotiator. The reason being, when confronted by an aggressive negotiator, more than likely, you’re already experiencing a heightened sense of anxiety. That may be in the form of just being more aware of your negotiation environment. The point is, you’re not relaxed, you’re on edge. That will prohibit your normal thought process from occurring which could lead to making errant decisions.

To recount, in all of your negotiations, be aware that setup questions may be posed at different times and for multiple purposes. They can be used:

For the purpose of altering your mental state. Once your mental state is altered, you may be more susceptible to falling into a defense that simply keeps you off the offense.

For positioning purposes, a setup question may be used to have you viewed in an unflattering manner, so as to marginalize the perception that others have of you and to disallow them from having empathy to your point or position.

To alter one’s mind, such questions may also be used in an attempt to make you forget, defuse, or confuse the point you were attempting to make.

The more alert you are to the possibility of setup questions being used in your negotiations, and how they might be used, the better prepared you’ll be at defending yourself against them. Doing so will give you an advantage in the negotiation … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

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