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How to Use Micro-Expressions to Negotiate Better

“The mind conceals hidden thoughts. Micro-expressions expose them.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Are you aware that you can see the thoughts of other people? It’s not a magic trick. It’s accomplished by observing micro-expressions. Microexpressions are displays of emotion. They last for less than a second. They occur before the brain has a chance to alter the displayed emotion. Thus, the display is a genuine reaction to the stimulus that caused the emotion to be displayed.

There are seven microexpressions that are generic to everyone on the planet. That means if a stimulus occurred to someone in Europe or Asia, or anywhere in the world, the reaction would be the same.

This article identifies the seven microexpressions and how their recognition can be used in a negotiation.

Fear – Why do we become frightened? In part, it’s a way we protect ourselves. But fear can be debilitating too. In a negotiation, accurately detecting fear will give you an advantage. To obtain that advantage, you must know what the other negotiator is fearful of.

When detecting genuine fear, look for raised eyebrows, widened eyes, and parted lips with the bottom lip protruding downward.

Anger – People become upset in degrees. When it reaches a point of nontolerance, that’s when it becomes anger.

When negotiating, always be mindful of the other negotiator’s temperament, as well as your own. In both cases, when one loses one’s cool, that person can become irrational. Manipulation can easily occur at that time. Thus, they’re opportunities contained in such a mindset if you know how to advantage your position.

There are two main differences between the displayed microexpressions of fear and anger. With fear, eyebrows are raised and they’re lowered when displaying anger. In addition, with anger, one’s nostrils will flare like what a bull might exhibit prior to charging.

Disgust – In a negotiation, this is a temperament that we see when someone is not in agreement with our statement, offer or counteroffer. The other negotiator may say yes to the offer. But if he has his upper lip lifted and his nose turned up in a wrinkle while doing so, he just displayed the microexpression denoting disgust. It’s important to note the distinction between his words and actions because his statement of agreement is not as firm as his body language is indicating.

Surprise – Expressions of surprise can be good or bad (e.g. That’s better than I thought, or there’s no way I’d go for that.) You can recognize surprise by raised eyebrows, wide eyes, and a mouth that’s agape. Fear and surprise have these characteristics in common.

When negotiating, note if the expression of surprise stems from happy or sad expectations. If the other negotiator is too happy about an offer you’ve extended, you might consider reducing it.

Contempt – This gesture is conveyed by a sneer with one corner of the mouth turned upward. The meaning is, “I’m not enamored with this – I might think it’s insulting.’

Take note when you observe this gesture because it can lead to disgust and then anger.

Sadness – When sadness is displayed it’s done through drooping eyelids, lips turned down, and a change in the voice’s inflection and tonality.

If a negotiator displays sadness, it may stem from him realizing that you have the upper hand and there’s no negotiation wiggle room. If that’s a reality, don’t beat him up. You don’t want to turn that into anger, which might lead to unimagined responses.

Happiness – You’ll see this in the form of wide-eyes, a smile, raised cheeks, and a degree of exhibited gaiety.

When perceiving happiness, take note on what caused it but don’t let your guard down. If it’s genuine, you’ll sense an easy flow in the negotiation. If contrived, it may be an attempt to lull you into a false sense of security.

Negotiators look for advantages in every negotiation. Being able to accurately detect microexpressions can be the advantage you need. So, if you want greater advantages during your negotiations, look for the advantages that microexpressions offer. You’ll be a greater negotiator with greater outcomes … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.co 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

# microexpressions #Power #Powerful #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

Do You Know How to Stop Your Negative Thoughts?

“Either you control your negative thoughts, or your negative thoughts will control you.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

He worried about the worst-case scenario and his stomach became queasy due to his negative thoughts. He thought, “I’m through if this doesn’t work.”

I’m willing to bet that you’ve had such occurrences in your life – I know I’ve had them. Have you thought what causes us to focus on negative thoughts?  Do you know how to stop your negative thoughts from pummeling your mind?

What causes people to have negative thoughts?

Negative thoughts stem from our brain attempting to protect us. Thus, if it senses something that caused us angst in the past, we become guarded. We may do that even if our latest perceived threat is only loosely associated with a past occurrence. If we become obsessive, our thought may become negative.

To thwart the thoughts of past negativity, consider the fact that you survived whatever trauma came from it. More than likely you learned something new, something about yourself, and a new way to cope with negativity. I’m not suggesting that you haphazardly discount negative thoughts, I’m suggesting that you not allow them to debilitate you.

You can prevent negative thoughts from overwhelming you by:

1. Focusing on something more positive.

2. Getting drunk! You’re probably shocked I said that. I’m just joking. But that’s an example of how you can alter your thoughts. You can shock your mind, which will take it off the negative thought. While this may be temporary, you can do this over a longer period. Just keep thinking of more shocking thoughts.

3. Preparing for a worst-case scenario, know that you’re prepared if it occurs, and ridding your mind of the negativity associated with that thought.

4. Focus on what’s positive in your life. While doing so, negativity will take a back seat.

5. Use negative thoughts as a source of motivation. If something is nagging at you, realize that it’s doing so for a reason. Something is probably lurking in the subconsciousness of your mind. Elevate it to your state of consciousness. Then, you can deal with it. Once done, banish it to an island of loneliness.

Negative thoughts are the killer of wellbeing and advancement in life. Once you learn to deal with your negative demons, you will have slain a hidden source that prevents you from moving to higher points in your life … and everything will be right with the world.

What does this have to do with negotiations?

If you’re focusing on negativity during a negotiation, you’ll be more likely to play defense. You’ll be less likely to go on the offense and take advantage of momentary openings. The latter will be due to your hesitation to act at that moment. More than likely, you’ll get stuck in an analytical mode. Before you realize it, the opportunity will have passed.

When you find you’re focusing too much on negativity during a negotiation, take a break and clear your head. Assess the cause and source of your thoughts. Create a strategy to deal with negative occurrences. Above all, never negotiate while in a negative frame of mind. Stop your negative thoughts.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Negative #Stop #Thoughts #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

How to Out-Negotiate and Understand Powerful Handshakes

“When someone shakes your hand, take note of what their other hand is doing. Their other hand heightens the meaning of the handshake.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“During our introduction, I felt uneasy. There was something in his handshake that made me think that he was attempting to project himself as being powerful. I wasn’t really sure what that handshake meant but I knew he was sending me a message.” Those were words spoken by a team member when recalling how he felt at the outset of a negotiation.

Handshakes convey hidden meanings. They are one aspect of body language that people should pay more attention to. They can make you feel powerful, be perceived as powerful, or make you appear weak.

Continue reading to discover the hidden meanings conveyed simply by shaking someone’s hand.

Meaning of Handshakes:

  • Hand on Top – One hand on top of the other person’s hand

    • Normally, the person whose hand is on top is signaling superiority. But, allowing one’s hand to be on the bottom can be a ploy to allow the other person to believe he’s in a superior position.

  • Hard – One that appears to be overbearing

    • A hard handshake can be a sign of attempted intimidation. It can also stem from someone that is naturally strong and unaware of the strength they convey when shaking someone’s hand.
    • One’s perception is what denotes the degree that a handshake is strong or overbearing. If you’ve had prior encounters with the other party and have shaken their hand, you have a basis for comparison in the present situation. If you don’t have that comparison, consider what a normal handshake would be like from someone of the same size, gender, and background.

  • Weak – Lacking power, dainty, gentle

    • Weak handshakes convey the exact opposite meaning of those that are hard. Again, don’t necessarily infer that someone is weak because they deliver a weak handshake. It may be the way they wish you to perceive them at the outset of your meeting.

  • Hand/Arm Jerk – While shaking the hand, a quick movement is made that pulls the hand quickly in a jerking motion in one direction and then pushes it backward in the opposite direction.

    • Sometimes, in a playful setting, friends will engage in such banter. In negotiation settings, this gesture is most likely a subtle signal that the one exhibiting it plans to keep the other negotiator off guard. Take note when receiving such gestures and compare it to what follows.

  • Firm – Not too hard, not too soft, both hands parallel to each other

    • In a negotiation, negotiators state through this gesture that they’re equal and respectful of each other.

The person holding the handshake the longest is the one controlling it – they’re stating that they’re not ready to let go. A normal handshake usually lasts for 3 to 5 upward and downward movements. Any more is excessive, which means it’s being done for a reason.

Here’s the rub. Just because someone extends a weak handshake doesn’t make them weak, nor does a strong handshake make them strong.  It can all be a ploy. That means you can use this ploy as a tactic in your negotiations.

By understanding the meaning of handshakes, you understand more of what’s occurring. Thus, when someone shakes your hand, you can respond based on how you wish them to perceive you. That will alter the setting of any negotiation. That will also empower you … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Handshake #Power #Powerful #Emotion #Business #Progress #SmallBusiness #Negotiation #NegotiatingWithABully #Power #Perception #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions

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Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

Do You Want to Know How to Negotiate Better?

“You should only seek to negotiate better if you seek to acquire better outcomes in life.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Are you aware that they’re specific components that go into a good negotiation? Those components determine the probability of a negotiator’s success. If you would like to know how to negotiate better, note the components that follow.

Observe Body Language and Nonverbal Signals:

Being able to accurately detect body language and nonverbal signals allows a negotiator to hear and see the unspoken thoughts of the other negotiator. Most negotiators can detect when “something’s off”. But most miss more signals than they catch.

As the basis to reading body language, understand that one’s body always attempts to stay in a state of comfort. Thus, when a stimulus causes it to be out of that state, the body reacts to being out of balance. Therefore, to note when the body transfers from one state to another, note its cause.

Pre-Negotiation Probing Questions:

Negotiations are about control. It flows between you and the other negotiator throughout the negotiation. You can control that flow through questions.

Before engaging in the negotiation process, ask yourself deeply seeded probing questions (e.g. what you’re seeking from the negotiation, why do you want the outcome, what will you do if you can’t achieve it, what does a winning/losing outcome look like, etc.). The purpose of this is to uncover hidden thoughts that might drive your actions at the negotiation table. You should also put yourself in the shoes of the other negotiator and pose similar questions from his perspective.

Negotiation Strategies:

Be prepared to address the following occurrences in the negotiation.

Opening: Start by making sure that you and the other negotiator know what you’re negotiating for. Do this at the beginning of the negotiation by stating your understanding. You’d be surprised at the number of miscommunications that occur due to the negotiators not being on the same page.

Dealing with offers:

The first offer – Depending on your negotiation abilities, you can make the first offer – it will set an anchor. The tradeoff about making or not making the first offer really lies in your abilities to out-negotiate the other negotiator, due to the anchoring effect that the first offer provides.

Counteroffers – Make counteroffers with the degree of deliberation required for the situation. If the offer has a substantial bearing on the negotiation, don’t give the impression of countering it with haste. Remember, you’re conveying subliminal messages through your actions throughout the negotiation.

Take it or leave it – Don’t make this offer unless you’re serious about exiting the negotiation. This type of offer has a sense of hardening a negotiation if it’s not accepted. It also places you in a difficult position if you must retreat from it.

What if – The ‘what if’ offer can be used to test the other negotiator. It’s akin to being behind a shield. Because, if the other negotiator does not accept your offer, you’re not obligated to commit to it. Plus, you gain insight into his thoughts per what he will or will not accept.

Closing – You should be very vigilant in the closing phase of the negotiation. It’s the point that some negotiators make concessions to keep the deal together. Thus, savvy negotiators will take the opportunity to make a ‘slight’ request at that time. All the time, they’ve been planning for just this moment to do so.

As you know, they’re many moving parts to a negotiation. Thus, the more you can flow with the altering terrain that occurs, the greater the chances of success. Utilize the insights above and you’ll heighten that probability … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#power #powerful #Negotiate #Negotiations #bodylanguage #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

 

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Management Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

Negotiator – Do You Know How to be More Powerful?

“Power is perceptional. To control the perception of power, control how it’s perceived.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“The patient fussed with her fur coat as she sauntered up to the doctor’s receptionist. “I have an appointment in 15 minutes with the doctor. Is she on time to see her special patients today?” The receptionist replied with a taunt to her tone, “The doctor’s patients are all special to her. She’ll see you soon.” With that, the receptionist left her station and engaged in other activities.

Are you aware that you can be perceived as more powerful by the way you present yourself? Do you know how to be more powerful as a negotiator? Continue reading and you’ll discover how to enhance your power in your negotiations.

Display of Empathy:

In the story above, the patient ‘sauntered’ into the doctor’s office, fussing with her fur coat and positioned herself as the doctor’s special patient. She projected an image of someone that was self-absorbed. Had she taken the time to observe the receptionist’s activities, commented about them and conveyed a pleasantry, the patient would have been displaying empathy. In doing so, she would have enhanced her power. Instead, she diluted it.

The display of empathy towards another’s plight is one way to bond with that individual. It also says subliminally that you’re not just concerned about yourself. You recognize the other person for what they’re dealing with.

Never discount the value or role that empathy plays in any interaction. It humanizes you while strengthening the emotional ties between people. And that enhances power.

Your Persona:

I’m the king. Bow down to me – Not! When you project an image of self-aggrandizement, some people will rebuff you. They’ll be appalled at the perception you have of yourself, which will cause them to become rigid to your request. While such a persona may work favorably with some people, over time, they too will become tired of it. Then, they will seek ways to avoid or demean you.

Your persona changes over the course of your life. Always attempt to align it with how you’d like to be perceived. During a negotiation, you can dilute a powerful position simply because your persona rubs someone the wrong way.

Demeanor When Rebuffed:

When you’re rebuffed, how do you feel? I’m sure your answer is dependent on who the person is, what the subject matter was, and where it occurred. Just as your answer depends on those variables, so it does with those you engage with.

To possess more power, limit its display to environments where it’s less likely challenged (e.g. boss vs. subordinate, etc.). In addition, if you know you’ll be in an unfriendly environment, have retorts ready that will subdue the subject of the rebuff. Just make sure you don’t escalate the situation and cause yourself distress.

Some of the reasons people are perceived as more or less powerful are mentioned above. There are more reasons but let those be a starting point. To enhance your negotiation efforts and outcomes, always be mindful of how you’re perceived. To the degree it fits the negotiation, align your perceived power based on the person you’re negotiating with. If it’s not perceived as being threatening or overbearing and that’s what you’re striving to achieve, you will have aligned the perception of your power successfully. That will make you appear to be more powerful … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#power #powerful #Negotiate #Negotiations #bodylanguage #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Body Language Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Skills Women In Business

Body Language Dread – How to Avoid Disaster When Negotiating

“To avoid disasters, recognize what they look like and avoid actions that lead to them.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

“… He touched his knee! I thought, what does that mean? I #dread trying to read body language when negotiating!” An associate recounted her thoughts to me when discussing how she was attempting to avoid disaster during a negotiation. She wanted to understand and decipher the meaning of an individual’s body language. I told her, the gesture could have meant anything, nothing, or everything. Then, I went on to explain that one isolated body language gesture does not necessarily lend insight into someone’s emotions or thoughts – you must look at a cluster of gestures for that. I then stated, there’s an exception – it occurs when you’re observing micro-expressions.

Observe the body language gestures below. Cross-reference them to gain greater insight into the meaning they have when they’re clustered. That will grant you the insight into someone’s thoughts and what might have caused them. Being able to accurately detect these signals will enhance your negotiation abilities.

Crossed Arms:

Crossed arms by themselves does not mean that someone is unapproachable or close-minded. It could mean that the person is cold. Also, women tend to cross their arms more than men because of their anatomy.

To gain more insight about why someone crossed their arms, note the stimuli that caused it. To test their demeanor, say or ask something that will cause them to uncross their arms (e.g. that’s a nice watch – may I see it). Then, notice if they go back into their crossed arms position. If they do, you can test again with another question. After that, if they still cross their arms, you’ll have more information to make a better assessment of their demeanor.

Hands:

Movement – When someone speaks, note the timing of their hand movement. If it’s rhythmically aligned with their speech, subliminally, more believability will be lent to their words.

Handshakes – A handshake can connote hidden meanings (e.g. hands vertical to each other, we’re equal – hand on top, I’m superior). Never fall prey to the hidden meanings of handshakes. Good negotiators may intentionally allow someone to have the ‘upper hand’ as a ploy to convey subservience.

Fist – When a discussion becomes heated, observe when someone’s hand forms a fist. The fist can denote deepening anger or commitment in what’s being discussed. If the stimuli that caused the fist to be displayed was unintended, seek to de-escalate the conversation.

Smiles:

A genuine smile is denoted by crow’s feet at the corner of the eyes and elevated cheeks. It’s important to recognize the distinction from non-genuine smiles. Knowing the difference can assist in uncovering someone’s alignment.

Micro-expressions:

There are seven micro-expressions that are generic to everyone on earth. Thus, the stimuli applied to someone in Asia will have the same effect applied to someone in Europe, or anywhere else in the world. The seven micro-expressions are:

  1. Fear (eyebrows raised, wide eyes, lips slightly stretched & parted, bottom lip protruding downward)
  2. Anger (eyebrows down and together, eyes glare, narrowing of the lips)
  3. Disgust (lifting of the upper lip, scrunching of the nose)
  4. Surprise (raised eyebrows, wide eyes, open mouth)
  5. Contempt (one side of the lip raised and pulled in on one side of the face)
  6. Sadness (upper eyelids drooping, eyes unfocused, lips slightly turned down)
  7. Happiness (crow’s feet wrinkle around eyes, cheeks elevated, eye orbit muscle movement)

Misinterpreting someone’s body language can lead to unanticipated consequences. To assure that doesn’t occur to you, observe the gestures above when they’re clustered.

While reading body language is not a perfect science, it can give clues into someone’s thought process. Knowing what to look for, and interpreting nonverbal signals accurately, can help you avoid disasters when you negotiate … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Dread #Avoid #disaster #Negotiate #Negotiations #bodylanguage #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Negotiator – How To Be Smarter About Risk Assessment

“To abate risks better, deal with those that pose the greatest threat to your goals first.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

What do you consider when thinking of risk assessment? Do you think about the impact that your past will have on it? Do you consider the same about the person you’ll be negotiating against? There is a multitude of things to consider. Doing so before the negotiation will make you a smarter negotiator. Before your next negotiation, mull over the following insights when pondering how to be smarter about risk assessment.

Gains versus Losses:

Sometimes, people become caught up in the moment. They forget to weigh their potential gains against their potential losses. Losing track of such mindfulness can leave you wondering why you engaged in such folly, once you’ve returned to a clear state of mind.

When assessing risk, know what you’re assessing as it relates to your larger goal. Don’t place yourself in a position where you make a tradeoff or offer, get it, and then discover that there’s an unintended cost for the acquisition. If a request is too costly, it may behoove you not to enter the bidding. A risk matrix can assist in that avoidance.

Risk Matrix:

You can use a risk matrix chart to assess the probability of an outcome in a negotiation. That will help you uncover any hidden risks that you may not have considered. Based on what you know of the other negotiator, you can assess the probability of how he’ll act/react to certain offers and counteroffers. Thus, you might have your offers and potential counteroffers plotted on one scale and markers denoting the probability that he’ll respond in a certain way on the other (e.g. strong possibility, likely, maybe, low probability, not likely). Then, weight each category (e.g. 85-100%, 65-85%, 45-65%, 25-45%, 0-25%, respectively). Of course, your risk matrix will only be valid to the degree your assessment of the other negotiator is accurate. If it’s not you’ll have garbage in, garbage out.

Ploys:

  • Lead/Led – Ask the other negotiator for his thoughts and inputs on matters that you’re unsure about his thoughts. By obtaining his thoughts you’ll gain insight into how he’s thinking. The bonus of that will be of him having the appearance that he’s leading the negotiation. That will also assist your efforts in decreasing the risk that the negotiation might go into unseen and unsuspected areas.

 

  • Offers – Don’t make offers that would demean or insight the other negotiator. You don’t have to tread so gently that he begins to press you on issues. instead, find the balance between the point of leading and following and know when to commit to either.

 

  • Anger – When thinking of the strategies you’ll employ in the negotiation be leery of using anger. There are potential hidden risks involved when you anger someone. They can become unpredictable, which means not only would you demean the validity of your risk matrix, you might do irrevocable harm to the negotiation.

 

Suffice it to say, the fewer variables you can account for when negotiating the stronger your negotiation position will be. That will lead you to be smarter about risk assessment … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com 

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

#Risk #RiskAssessment #Negotiate #Negotiations #bodylanguage #Negotiator #Business #Management #SmallBusiness #Money #Negotiating #combat #negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #PersonalDevelopment #HandlingObjections #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #NegotiationPsychology

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Best Practices Entrepreneurship Human Resources Investing Management Marketing Negotiations Sales Women In Business

Can You Negotiate in a Life and Death Challenge?

“Perception determines how you’ll engage in an endeavor. Thus, you should always assess your perception before doing so.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

There you are. Everything is on the line. You’re negotiating in a life and death challenge. What might you do and how might you negotiate differently giving the life and death challenge that confronts you? Would the answer depend on whose life you were negotiating for?

Okay, let’s turn the temperature down a little. Suppose it was your job or a contract that you were negotiating for instead of someone’s life. Would that alter the negotiation tactics and strategies you’d employ?

There are central components that flow through every negotiation. The only thing that changes is their order based on the severity of the negotiation.

The following are components that will occur in every negotiation you’ll encounter. Master them and you’ll have a greater chance of mastering successful negotiation outcomes.

Mindset: Your mindset is your greatest ally or foe.

  • Always be aware of the mindset you possess when negotiating. Your mindset will determine the degree that you think logically or illogically.
  • Your mindset will change based on the challenges you perceive and how you address them. That will impact the interactions you have with the other negotiator.
  • Be aware of what causes you to see yourself differently. Therein will lie embedded clues about why your mind shifts. 

Bonding: I understand you. We’re alike.

  • People like people that are like themselves. And, they want to be heard and appreciated.
  • Bonding helps people to perceive you as being like them.
  • The time to ask for concessions in a negotiation is when you’ve bonded sufficiently. It’s an important factor that increases the odds of getting what you want.

Positioning/Controlling the negotiation: Look how far we’ve come. I see a positive outcome on the horizon.

  • Prior to starting the negotiation establish what will be discussed. That will determine the flow of the negotiation.
  • Set the agenda to discuss the items of greatest importance first. The other negotiator will have his priorities. So, be prepared to trade points to ensure you control the negotiation’s flow.
  • Determine which strategies and tactics are most appropriate for the type of negotiation you’ll engage in.

Reframing: That’s not what I meant.

  • Know when to reframe an offer. Sometimes people perceive offers differently from what was intended. If you sense that, reframe the offer. That will allow it to be viewed from a different perspective, which could make it more appealing.
  • To reframe an offer to make it more appealing, position it as a benefit to the other negotiator.

Pace: Change of pace alters a negotiation’s flow.

  • Bypass points of contention when you want to avoid them (e.g. Let’s come back to that later).
  • Negotiate slower or faster to increase or relieve anxiety or pressure when it’s to your advantage to do so.
  • Changing your pace of speech when making offers will impact their perception. If more time is required to have the importance of an offer appreciated, consider speaking slower. That will subliminally convey its importance.

Hope: The outcome doesn’t have to be bleak.

  • Brandish hope as an ally. Doing so will keep people engaged in the negotiation.
  • Take hope away when the other negotiator strays in the wrong direction. Your intent is to let him know that he’s engaged in a losing proposition.

Every negotiation you’ll be in will not be life and death. But the components above will be in every negotiation you’re in. Using them adeptly will enhance your probability of having a successful negotiation outcome … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

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Avoid Bias Mistakes – How to Negotiate Better

“Biases are motivators that move us to action. Be aware of those that serve you and those that don’t.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Negotiator #1 – “I knew they’d back out of the deal. All of them negotiate like that.”

Negotiator #2 – “As I was negotiating with those guys, I knew I’d have to back out of the deal. They never negotiate fairly.”

In the above situation, neither negotiator was aware of their bias. The absence of that mindfulness brought unrecognized pressures on the negotiation. Each negotiator made mistakes because of it. It was also the reason the negotiation fell apart. Are you aware of your biases when you negotiate?

To negotiate better, note when you might possess the following bias mindset.

Cognitive:

These are biases that you’re aware of. They can easily slip your mind when you negotiate. It’s like breathing, automatic. The potential danger arises when you negotiate in an automatic mode and having this bias unknowingly directing your actions. To address it, be aware of what you’re aware of. Don’t shrug off a thought too lightly because you think you’ve addressed it. The more aware you are of how you feel, the better you’ll be at identifying why you feel a certain way.

Unconscious:

To be unconscious of anything is to be unaware of it. In a negotiation, when you’re unaware of a driving force, unconscious biases may be the source. To combat this possibility, note the source of your emotional sensations. Identify if you’re fearful, elated, expectant, or cautious. Then, note if it stems from a visual, kinesthetic, or auditory source. Doing that will sensitize your emotions to your state of mind. That will alert you to the realities of what’s motivating your action.

Culture:

It can be risky to lump everyone from the same culture into the same category. People are individuals with their own perspective of reality. The more you view someone as an individual, the greater the chance to see that person for the unique qualities they possess. Negotiating with them on that bases will enhance the opportunity to connect with them at their level. That will lead to better understandings about why they negotiate in a particular manner, while you help them obtain what they seek from the negotiation.

Bullying:

Some people bully others and some are just tough. Based on what you’ve experienced in life, you may deem someone a bully when negotiating. The person may just be a tough negotiator. There’s a difference in those personality types. Be very cautious about how you brand someone when negotiating. Because, the way you brand them will affect the way you view them, their actions, and the way you negotiate with them.

Confirmation:

We see what we expect to see. That affects our perception. Realize that your perception of reality won’t always be right. That should cause you to pause when you think, “I know he’s like ‘x’. Everyone in his group is just like that.” When making broad assumptions, be aware that anything which seemingly supports your beliefs may serve as confirmation about those beliefs. The truth may lie further from reality than you think. Don’t conflate like-appearing assumptions that should be thought separators.

The more you’re aware of the biases you carry into a negotiation, the less mental baggage you’ll have. Being aware of that fact and heightening it in the negotiation should lead you to greater negotiation outcomes … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating! 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

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Negotiate More Effectively by Knowing How to Act Better

“Everything in life is an act. And you’re the actor on the stage of your life.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

Do you plan how you’ll #act when you #negotiate? What #role do you decide you’ll play? Knowing the right role to display will allow you to negotiate better. You can’t predict every circumstance you’ll encounter in a negotiation. But the better prepared you are, the better your act will be.

Your act:

Everyone plays a role when negotiating. And, your role should align with how you wish the other negotiator to perceive you; that’s your act. You should not view it as bad or inauthentic; it’s an act. If it’s misaligned, you run the risk of weakening your position. As an example, you shouldn’t become a bully if you’ve been playing the role of someone that’s helpful. That would be a misalignment.

Consider the following and keep in mind that you can morph from one act to another. Just be sure there’s an easily perceived reason for doing so.

Nonchalant

You can adopt this act to project a ‘no-care’ attitude (i.e. if it happens, fine – if it doesn’t, fine). You might employ this demeanor when you wish to confuse the other negotiator about your real interest in what he’s offering. Make sure not to become unmasked by being too deep into the role. Because a fleeting offer may disappear before you can shift acts.

Defiant

“I won’t accept that offer under any circumstances!” Be cautious when adopting this act. It can leave you in a position that’s difficult to retreat from. While this can be a good tactic, if it’s overused and you must concede, you’ll be weaker throughout the rest of the negotiation.

To combat the perception of being in a weaker position, consider feigning momentary hopelessness. It’ll lend credence to your act. But you must attempt to regain your defiant act, be it from a less entrenched position, to regain your position. You’ll only be able to use the hopelessness ploy once, twice if you’re overly convincing. So, be mindful of how and when you employ it. If you do so too early in the negotiation, you’ll lessen its effect later. If you do it too late, you’ll bring additional scrutiny upon your act.

Helpful

Most people like helping people. It’s a characteristic that’s pleasing. It’s also a characteristic that some people despise. Thus, you must know when to be a helpful actor and when to drop the act.

Dominant negotiators, the bullying type, tend not to want help. They already know what’s good for the negotiation. From their perspective, your insights will only hinder the process.

Invoke the helpful act with collaborative negotiator types. They seek input to promote win-win negotiation outcomes. To better effect this act, consider when you’ll lead and when you’ll follow. To follow, ask the other negotiator for her opinion. Then, build on it. To lead, present a non-threatening offer and ask your collaborator what she thinks of it. Build on what she says.

Dominant

Most people don’t like to be dominated; it places too many restrictions on them. Nevertheless, acting dominantly versus someone that’s savvy and in control can have its benefits. The difference lies in whether you’re perceived as being overbearing, strong-willed, or just knowledgeable. To effect this act, attune yourself to the other negotiator’s perception. There can be hidden value in this role. Knowing how to uncover that value makes it more valuable.

The stage you’re in, in the negotiation, should direct how you act. Like a good director, if you time your actions appropriately, your actions will be more believable. That will lead to more winning negotiation outcomes … and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.TheMasterNegotiator.com/greg-williams/

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