Breaking Free from the Chains of Financial Self-Sabotage

Imagine finally being able to afford something you’ve worked hard for—a symbol of your effort and dedication—only to have it stolen a week later. This is exactly what happened to Bobby. That stolen bike wasn’t just a loss of material value; it became a metaphor for his life. Over time, Bobby internalized the belief that planning, saving, and sacrificing simply weren’t worth it. If things never seem to work out, why bother? This mindset didn’t just affect his ability to create wealth; it shaped his entire approach to life, especially his relationship with money.

 

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Instead of pursuing opportunities that could lead to financial growth, Bobby chose the path of least resistance. When it came time to go to college, he opted for a school close to home where acceptance was guaranteed, avoiding any risk of rejection or failure. He didn’t apply for scholarships or student loans because, in his mind, the effort would be futile. This pattern of self-sabotage is more common than we might think, and it holds us back from achieving our full potential, including the ability to create income we will never outlive.

 

The beliefs that drive these behaviors, known as “money scripts,” often form in childhood. At one point, they might have served a purpose, but over time, they can become destructive. These scripts are deeply ingrained and act as barriers to financial growth and personal development. To break free, we must first recognize these patterns, understand their origins, and identify the circumstances that trigger them. Only then can we begin to rewrite the narrative and take control of our financial destiny, moving towards creating wealth that sustains us.

 

You might be thinking that these money disorders sound extreme, maybe even a little scary. And yes, they can lead to exaggerated behaviors, but that doesn’t change the fact that we all have them to some degree. The real danger lies in the shame that often accompanies these behaviors. Shame can be paralyzing; it tells us that we’re not good enough, that we don’t deserve success, and that we’re unworthy of financial peace. This mindset keeps us from taking the steps necessary for financial growth and from creating income we will never outlive.

 

As a financial counselor who has worked with thousands of individuals, families, and businesses, I’ve seen firsthand how pervasive these feelings of shame can be. Many clients describe their past financial behaviors with a sense of deep regret and self-loathing. But here’s the thing: shame robs us of our power. It convinces us to give up before we’ve even started, preventing us from creating the wealth and security we desire. To overcome this, we must embrace our humanity—flaws and all—and take an honest look at where we are. It’s only by doing this that we can begin to dismantle our money disorders and replace them with healthier, more productive behaviors.

 

What are the money stories you were born with? Perhaps you’ve heard phrases like “A penny saved is a penny earned,” or “Money doesn’t grow on trees.” These messages, passed down from generation to generation, shape our beliefs and behaviors around money. But what if we could change the narrative? What if, instead of clinging to outdated beliefs, we focused on financial growth, on creating wealth that empowers us, and on building an income that we will never outlive?

 

Consider the impact of a single experience from childhood—like losing money that was desperately needed by a parent. Such an event can leave a lasting impression, one that shapes your financial behaviors for years to come. But recognizing the power of that moment allows you to take control and rewrite your story. This is what I encourage you to do: identify your money story, share it with others, and begin the process of transformation.

 

The best part of this journey is that change is possible. By removing the mental and emotional blocks that hold us back, we can reprogram our financial mindset. If you’re frustrated by your inability to change your financial habits, if you’re tired of feeling anxious about money, or if you long for a sense of financial peace and freedom, now is the time to act. Don’t just reach for the next quick fix; instead, dig deep to uncover the hidden causes of your financial stress. Embrace the challenge of financial growth, focus on creating wealth, and commit to building an income that you will never outlive.

 

It’s time to overcome our fears and step into the light of who we truly are. Financial freedom isn’t just a dream—it’s within reach for all of us. But it starts with changing the way we think about money, letting go of the shame, and taking bold steps towards a future filled with abundance and security.

 

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Do you have questions? Email me at Kris@HealthyMoneyHappyLIfe.com

Phone (951) 926-4158