“Either you control your negative thoughts, or your negative thoughts will control you.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert
He worried about the worst-case scenario and his stomach became queasy due to his negative thoughts. He thought, “I’m through if this doesn’t work.”
I’m willing to bet that you’ve had such occurrences in your life – I know I’ve had them. Have you thought what causes us to focus on negative thoughts? Do you know how to stop your negative thoughts from pummeling your mind?
What causes people to have negative thoughts?
Negative thoughts stem from our brain attempting to protect us. Thus, if it senses something that caused us angst in the past, we become guarded. We may do that even if our latest perceived threat is only loosely associated with a past occurrence. If we become obsessive, our thought may become negative.
To thwart the thoughts of past negativity, consider the fact that you survived whatever trauma came from it. More than likely you learned something new, something about yourself, and a new way to cope with negativity. I’m not suggesting that you haphazardly discount negative thoughts, I’m suggesting that you not allow them to debilitate you.
You can prevent negative thoughts from overwhelming you by:
1. Focusing on something more positive.
2. Getting drunk! You’re probably shocked I said that. I’m just joking. But that’s an example of how you can alter your thoughts. You can shock your mind, which will take it off the negative thought. While this may be temporary, you can do this over a longer period. Just keep thinking of more shocking thoughts.
3. Preparing for a worst-case scenario, know that you’re prepared if it occurs, and ridding your mind of the negativity associated with that thought.
4. Focus on what’s positive in your life. While doing so, negativity will take a back seat.
5. Use negative thoughts as a source of motivation. If something is nagging at you, realize that it’s doing so for a reason. Something is probably lurking in the subconsciousness of your mind. Elevate it to your state of consciousness. Then, you can deal with it. Once done, banish it to an island of loneliness.
Negative thoughts are the killer of wellbeing and advancement in life. Once you learn to deal with your negative demons, you will have slain a hidden source that prevents you from moving to higher points in your life … and everything will be right with the world.
What does this have to do with negotiations?
If you’re focusing on negativity during a negotiation, you’ll be more likely to play defense. You’ll be less likely to go on the offense and take advantage of momentary openings. The latter will be due to your hesitation to act at that moment. More than likely, you’ll get stuck in an analytical mode. Before you realize it, the opportunity will have passed.
When you find you’re focusing too much on negativity during a negotiation, take a break and clear your head. Assess the cause and source of your thoughts. Create a strategy to deal with negative occurrences. Above all, never negotiate while in a negative frame of mind. Stop your negative thoughts.
Remember, you’re always negotiating!
After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com
To receive Greg’s free “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/
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